BlackestLily
3rd Level Green Feather
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When every gathering ends, I usually relive it with my wives Euphoricy and Skippy. When Bella Bash of 2010 wrapped up, we decided it would be very difficult, if impossible, to top how happy we were and what a good time we had. There was just no way another gathering could possibly trump it.
And then there was NEST 2011. We all had the time of our lives. I made a conscious effort to spend as much time as I could with as many as I could, and still felt like I barely scratched the NEST surface. We had an amazing time and it has NOW managed to become the best gathering I've had to date. And honest to God, without all of you amazing, beautiful (and some bearded) people, I don't know what my life would be like.
Instead of straight up listing individual names, I'm going to try to remember names based on funny/wonderful/amazing/etc experiences I had with them. And then of course, some thank yous. 🙂
Thank yous:
The NEST Team: Without all of your blood, sweat, tears, and effort, NONE of us could have added this experience under our belt. Thank you so much for all you do, including giving up YOUR NEST time to make sure the rest of us enjoy ours. From coordinating all classes, bringing in equipment, ordering food, checking everyone in, making nametags and packets, pin and cover creations, inside book artwork and stories, to having things printed and sitting up until 2 in the morning putting them together, you truly have something brilliant going on. I appreciate and thank you for your every effort. And thank you Lee, for thinking of giving me pins for my portfolio. You didn’t have to do that, but it was awesome and incredibly thoughtful of you. <3
Pokey: Without you, I wouldn’t have been at NEST at all. You continuously volunteer every year to leave a day later and let me be your road trip buddy. And I can’t tell you how much this means to me. You’re one of the most kind and generous human beings I know (and that’s saying a lot, because we both know some good people)! You even let me take over the music playing! 😀 And somehow this year we managed to make almost the entire trip in ONE day. HOW did we do it?? And you delivered me into the house and arms of Skippy-wife. I can’t thank you enough for that. I love her and you knew I wanted to see her so you made sure that happened sooner rather than later. Thank you SO much for your company and generosity. There’s no way I could ever repay you. 😀
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And now for my play by play (or at least as much as my hazy brain can remember):
Wednesday:
Immediately after work, I drove roughly a little over an hour to Pokey’s place; we packed his car and headed out. This year I bought one of those FM transmitters for my ipod so we wouldn’t run out of music. My NEST playlist was freaking awesome. 😀 We managed to hit hardly ANY construction, which made the trip much smoother. As both of us didn’t feel as tired as last year, we actually were able to make it to Skippy’s house at about 1:30 in the morning where Pokey dropped me off. Wife and I made love on the apartment lawn, and then we gathered my luggage and headed inside. Pokey met her kitties and we showed him the hoodies* we planned on presenting to rhino and other wife.
*The hoodies were an idea that began back sometime in September or October. She and I thought it would be cool to have some IFD hoodies. First the idea started with just dinosaurs, but grew from there. Sadly when Bellas hit, we didn’t have the money to have them made, so we were determined to have them by NEST. At some point we thought our rhino needed a hoodie to commemorate his rhino-ness as well. We tried as hard as humanly possible to hold it inside and tell nearly no one. We wanted it to be a COMPLETE surprise so that neither of them accidentally found out beforehand. I even printed out a stick figure throwing up rainbows and a purple rhino printed like a pattern on paper so we could have the perfect wrap for the gifts. 😀 We were SO EXCITED about the gifts that we nearly threw up on each other 5 million times. Now back to the story.
Pokey decided to head out and find a hotel along the way. Meanwhile, wife and I sat on her couches and talked for what we thought was maybe 30 minutes, but was actually more like 2 hours. After, we cleaned the rest of her apartment from top to bottom. She continued cleaning and doing laundry for most of the rest of the night while I slept like an asshole in her bed. 😀
Thursday:
After her class the next day, we both got ready and drove to Slacker’s place to get him and y0ungmachine for the drive to Philly. Neither of them knew I was going to be there so early, so we thought it would be funny to not tell him at all, and see his reaction when he saw me in the car. EXCEPT HE DIDN’T SEE ME IN THE CAR! They all had an entire conversation outside and packed their stuff in the trunk before he came around the side and noticed me there. We had a hug fest, and then it was onward to NEST! (This was a huge step considering the day before we didn’t know what was happening with Skippy’s car because it was being fixed.)
Along the way, we stopped at a gas station for breakfast that consisted of chips, beef jerky, and pop. Ohhhh yeaaaahhh. Slacker and I traded beef jerky, but I told him the piece he gave me had to be bigger than the one I gave him. 😀 Someone (I forget who) noticed some beef jerky in Slacker’s Beard. We then decided that Beard needed to eat to keep up its strength as feeding off host Slacker wasn’t enough. Almost the entire way down we enjoyed Disney songs…till Slacker finally had enough estrogen and we changed the music (only sometimes of course) to something of his liking. 😀
When we arrived at the hotel, the first people we met were the smoking crew outside. Hugs, love, and moar were given. Everyone was lovey and excited to be there! When we walked in, we met some newbies, and they were a bit shy and apprehensive (I think), but totally opened up and blossomed as the weekend went on (which was awesome!!!!) Wife and I hung out in the lobby for a bit before deciding it was traditional couch time for us. Within a few hours, many more people arrived and it was truly beginning to feel wonderful. We all sat in chairs and on the couches and bs’ed for lord knows how long. Kered presented me with a box one of my favorite snacks: cheezits! (Yeah…doesn’t take much to make me happy.) We all ate them and I wiped my cheezit dust off on Slacker, because of course, he is my napkin substitute. We tried to get as many people as we could to go to a restaurant called Shady Maple. I had never been there before, but all of the native PA people I’ve spoken with say it’s the most amazing thing since my cat Walter.
When we got there I determined it was size of a small country. Wife told me beforehand that you could probably fit 4 large weddings in the place and not ever run into one another (and she was right). The buffet stretched as long as the restaurant. Being drink-woman, my favorite part was the machines that dispensed pop and cappuccinos. I only ate 1.5 plates because my eating schedule was so screwed up that I couldn’t manage any more (very sad considering I wanted to pack a lot away, like a fat snake eating an entire deer). Euphoricy-wife met us there along with Korastus and much love and hugs were had. 😀 At some point, Slacker brought back a bowl of jello and a bowl of pudding. We started egging on people at the table to take it and hide it when he was at the food bar. Eventually the intrepid y0ungmachine took his desserts and we hid them in Euphoricy’s lap. When he came back he knew IMMEDIATELY we had something to do with it. (I’m pretending he’s a genius rather than we are obnoxiously predictable.) Eventually he walked away, and she set them on the table and started eating them, pretending she went up and got them herself. 😀 He came back, took his desserts, and told us basically we were all dead meat - Euphoricy and y0ungmachine for taking them, and Skippy and me for being accessories to the crime. (We sat there laughing. GUILTY IN SLACKER COURT!)
After all bellies were full, we carpooled back to the hotel. Skippy and y0ungmachine napped like Adorables in the back seat while Slacker drove and we talked about music on the way back. We met with more people who arrived while we were at Shady Maple and stayed at the hotel until probably 1 am when Soda Bobinksi told us he was on his way to Skippy’s house. Skippy, CapnMad, Euphoricy, and I all headed to the cars so we could meet him back at her house. Poor Skippy on her 1.5 hours of sleep wasn’t driving so hot, so we all stopped off at a Wawa (I seriously can’t get over that name) for something caffeinated and some noms. CapnMad did an amazing job of helping me navigate the store for a hot drink and some cough drops (because I am store-directionally retarded). Once we got back to her house, wife and I came in the back door so we could quickly hide Euphoricy’s and Rhinos gifts. We let everyone in and gave hello hugs to Soda.
In a glorious show of amazing, wife literally was able to rip her bra off without taking off her shirt while sitting at her computer desk and threw it in some random place in the room. 😀 We all got settled in and set up people and bedding. The 3 wives slept in Skippy’s bed while the boys slept out on the couches. We all stayed up FAR too long talking into the night. The cats were annoying, so we locked them out of the bedroom. Apparently the entire night they used CapnMad as their personal Yeti playground. 😀 Poor Yeti…
Friday:
When we woke up, Skippy was gone in class, arranging affairs with her car, etc. It was slow going, but both Euphoricy and I managed to squeeze in our showers. I’m having difficulty remembering the EXACT order of things in the morning, but I know I painted Euphoricy’s fingernails and toenails. I helped her pick her outfit for the day (as if I needed to…cause she’s frickin ridiculously hot in everything) and we started getting our stuff together.
The boys went to a local store to pick up a few things for breakfast in the meantime like the gentlemen that they are. When everyone was together, CapnMad and I decided it was time to start making breakfast. Except cooking in wife’s kitchen is like going camping (you know I love you wife). There were no oven pans to cook bacon on (or skillets for that matter), so we did some ghetto cooking. That included wrapping serving plates with aluminum foil and trying to roast it that way (no microwave!). We also made pancakes and scrambled eggs for all. The founder of the feast was CapnMad, and he was generous enough to buy all of the ingredients we needed. So thank you so much for your thoughtfulness and kindness! And like the asshole I am, I left the entire mess in her kitchen to clean when she came back. We wanted to be at NEST and we wanted it BAD. So there was much finishing of packing and loading things into cars. (And of course wife took her fucking gross and stupid stuffed monkey with the belly button that looks like the mouth on a sex blowup doll.)
CapnMad took the luggage in his car and was the intrepid guide and leader since he had the GPS. Hypothetically, wife lives about an hour and 15 to an hour and 30 minutes away from the hotel so we should have gotten there at 5:30. We didn’t get there until after 7 pm!! That was the most painful drive ever. The roads were filled with such heavy traffic that we ended up taking back roads for most of the way. Soda drove, while the wives took over the rest of the car and, OF COURSE, rocked out to MOAR DISNEY!!
Wife and I, in the meantime, were getting SO EXCITED about the hoodies that it was beginning to hurt our inner beasts that we couldn’t let it out. Once we finally arrived at the hotel, we snatched the luggage from the cars and went in. This was the beginning of what could have been a potentially painful situation. The hotel wouldn’t let us check in under the card we had because they screwed up how they charged it and the card locked. Out of NO WHERE our knight in shining NEST armor came to the front desk and said, “You can put it on my card until they work it out.” That knight was Kered. So thank you SO, SO, SO, SO much Kered for doing that for us. You didn’t have to do that, but you saved our IFD skins so we could get into our room. But of course, we needed to do our NEST registration first. So I want to apologize to Brighteyes for being a rushed asshole and trying to run out of the room. I was SO EXCITED about giving them the gifts that I wanted to get out of there ASAP. Forgive me! <3 (Speaking of registering, A+++++ on the time it took to register this year! It gets faster and better every time!)
We sent a text to Rhino, telling him to meet us in our room for the surprise. After some waiting and settling in, we finally got them both to sit on the couch. I swear at this point wife and I were going to shit ourselves we were so excited. We gave our small speech about how it took everything in us not to tell them, and then gave them the gifts! Euphoricy’s was a rainbow tiger, while Rhinos was…uh DUH, a rhino! We all hugged and loved on one another, and then wore the hoodies downstairs outside so we could get some photos. (We did take a photo that didn’t show our faces so we could show everyone who is interested in seeing them on the forum. That should be popping up shortly.) My highlight during that was when a family of about 5 pulled up to the curb and a little boy looked at me and asked, “Are you Bowser?” OPERATION HOODIE A SUCCESS!! We wouldn’t get official pictures until later though.
Because Friday night was casino night, we opted to stay at the hotel and eat and hang there. The wives went to the main room and grabbed some sandwiches, oranges, drink, and desserts. By the WAY. I heard through the grapevine that Skulls made all of those chocolates at the dinner. Holy. Crap. THOSE WERE AMAZING AND BEAUTIFUL!! And I was a huge fan of the chocolate covered marshmallows. 😀 We huddled around what I’m sure was an end table and ate our food. A little bit later a rhino, kraziedog, and musicroxmysox joined us. 😀 It was so wonderful to be able to be in the presence of old friends again, I nearly burst inside from being so happy. We also had the pleasure that night of meeting even more newbies, and they were polite, open, and WONDERFUL!
I also heard (but sadly didn’t see) Lamashtu get kidnapped. She put up the most B.A. fight in the history of histories. SHE’S FEROCIOUS AND I LOVE HER FOR IT!!
Skippy and I eventually meandered our way back to the couches to talk to newbies and others. Midway into our conversations, Euphoricy walked up and said she REALLY needed to talk to us privately and definitely in our room. We were hesitant to go, as we were having awesome conversations. But when a wife summons you, you heed the call. Up we went in the elevator, becoming increasingly suspicious when she wouldn’t even start talking about the matter on the way there. Both wives went into the room first, and then I went in last. As I was about to close the door, I saw a rhino standing behind it. Wife and I both had our panicked moment and I went to run out the door, but rhino slapped it shut with his rhino-y arm trunk.
Fate: sealed.
*Eventually we made our way to separate parts of the room where both wife and I fought bravely AND ferociously until we defeated the weak and unprepared pair. I punched the shit out of Slacker, doing 1000+ points of damage every time, while wife tore the rhino’s damn HORN OFF!! Some say the wives were divided that day, but I know the truth. Wife was just testing the both of us to make sure our fighting skills were still up to par. And they are wife, they are.
*If Rhino or Slacker has differing accounts about our demise, do not listen to them. They are lying liars. They know nothing. This is the truth.
After the Slaughter of 2011, we headed downstairs to continue participating in the NEST festivities. For the wives, that means sitting our lazy asses back on the couches and talking to MOAR PEOPLE!!! We got some drinks and talked the night away.
Persephone walked around generously dispersing her AMAZINGLY TASTY cookies, and we all munched. But what is a gathering without cookie tits? Krazie asked Persephone if he could use her cookies to do the honors. She gave the nod. It was on. Skippy’s shirt was opened and IN WENT THE COOKIES! We gathered them all and put them in a bowl after all was said and done. Bella walked over later and began noming on one of the cookies.
Everyone: “Wait Bella! Those were cookie tits!”
Bella: *Looks at cookie, shrugs, and continues to eat it*
There WAS going to be pizza delivered, but the asshats at the place DENIED us. At about 4 am or so, we all rolled into bed.
Saturday:
IFD was FAR more together this round, but we still slept in super late. The other members of IFD found me sleeping next to the bathroom on the floor in the morning. A combination of broken air conditioning and other factors lead to my cocooning there. I woke up to a Rhino talking shit and wives lovingly rubbing my back to gently wake me. (I highly recommend this over an alarm clock.) We all showered and beautified before heading downstairs.
We were starvin’ like Marvins so it was time to visit the front desk to take care of a few things before heading out for noms. Along the way we ran into…NEW KID! New Kid (his now official title) didn’t know this at the time, but we were going to get him to go to a restaurant with us whether he wanted to or not. So all of us went out and fit (somehow) into ONE car: Skippy, Euphoricy, SnailShell, me, New Kid, and Homer28. After taking a visit to the airport (because the GPS didn’t tell us the closest restaurants were THERE) we went to THE BEST BUFFET! (Seriously, in name and food.) It was a Chinese buffet, and they had a sushi bar, CRAB RANGOONS (FAV!), a fruit bar, and other amazing foods. We snagged a table, ordered drinks, AND DESTROYED!! Euphoricy gave Skippy her crab in an effort to break it open with a fork (which was a lost soldier after she was done). Crab gore covered the table. New Kid came back with a plate full of oranges, and IFD commandeered them because we pillage and plunder. Orange gore covered the table. We bs’ed and laughed about every little thing before heading out to a Rite Aid for vitamin waters. After that adventure, it was back to the hotel!
By the time we got back, other people were pondering what to do for dinner. Sadly we were all stuffed so we opted out of the first Nifty Fifties run that many enjoyed. Instead, we got our drink on and enjoyed the alcoholic drank-noms that the bar provides free of charge during certain times. I was able to FINALLY meet a lot more newbies and enjoy the company of MOAR people! (The bar even named one of the drinks after Skippy!)
At some point Euphoricy was gone enjoying herself elsewhere, which left wife and I. We went for a walk and ended up, yet again, on more couches in the lobby area. Rhino eventually joined us, along with New Kid and Lee. We all had cuddles and good conversation. <3 Wife and all others ended up going upstairs to Reverend’s party while I went to find Gin. I met up with her and NG02 and we had a GREAT time talking. FYI ladies, his massages are second to NONE. The man just knows what he’s doing, trust him.
After all was said and done, IFD reunited downstairs and found a group hanging by the bar area. We walked over and joined them and I was greeted by Amnesiac with, “FUCK YOU!!” Ahhh me. 😀 We verbally destroyed Slacker and Rhino yet again, leading them to go on a rage and mash wife and I together between them like meats on a sandwich. The crew ended up getting hungry later, so after massive arranging and arguing, a group got together and headed out late late late. I stayed behind and hung and cuddled with a few before getting super tired and heading to bed.
Sunday:
I would probably consider Sunday the best day of all for us. NG02 stayed in our room crunched up on a chair for the night because he didn’t want to wake his roomies. Wife and I got up earlier and showered so our roomies could sleep. We woke them to let them know we were heading downstairs and the bathroom was free. Once down there, it’s a big foggy how it went down but I know we got some noms and bullshitted on the couches for a while. Snail then offered to give me my first experience in rope binding. And if I do say so myself it was frickin amazing!! I have some pictures that I posted to my fetlife that he took of his awesome job. I want MOAR rope binding! He also lent me some comics (have I ever mentioned that he is an awesome human being? No? Well he’s an awesome human being. If you haven’t spent time with him or his love Tropic, DO EET!!)
He and I headed back downstairs and I went straight for the couches so wife and I could chat. Mid-chatting, we looked up to see the Rhino staring threateningly at us. I told the Rhino to come closer because I had a secret to tell him…THEN PUNCHED HIM IN HIS EMPTY HORN HOLE. He became so enraged in the general public that Skippy had to drag him off into a room and beat him into submission. (I don’t know how this Rhino can take so many, but he’s stubborn and has a thick hide.)
During Rhino-beating time, I managed some wonderful cuddles with my NEST-husband Kraziedog (who is also the most fantastic, wonderful human/bear being in the whole world). After wife came back downstairs, we began the hunt to find 13’s phone and organize everyone for the food run to Nifty Fifties. Once we FINALLY got all of our collective shits (ew) together, to Nifty Fifties it was! We had a lovely time ordering, seeing Dino again, nomming in the parking lot, and just enjoying our last day together. When we drove back, wife and I lay on our bed and talked in the room for a while to digest that which was bigass burger. We left the room after a little while and sat on the couches, but I was lured upstairs by a Shark and his gorgeous bait. 😀 I dressed in my school girl outfit, and met up with them for literally one of the best sessions I’ve ever had. I am more than a spanking convert now…I freakin LOVE IT! I feel like I have to go on his forum visitor message wall and spam the words “Fuck VOLLEYBALL” so he has some incentive for Bella Bash. 😀
As I was getting my land legs to leave, we all saw on the TV that Osama was killed. It’s still a bit difficult for me to believe. It seems in some strange way he’s just been there for so long that I thought he would always be there. We all took it in for a bit before I went to our room to change back and head (yet again) downstairs. I found out later from wife I was up there for a total of 3 hours. (A pretty glorious 3 hours if you ask me.)
For the remainder of the night, we hung out with everyone, cuddled, ate noms, and did whatever we felt like in those moments. (Literally, IFD hid in the bathroom for some private conversation at some point that probably could have taken place anywhere. The bathroom seemed the most appropriate though.)
I also brought a hoodie I created (Boo from Mario) and made a video with the help of Kraziedog and Skippy of me haunting Slacker. 😀 It was something fun and stupid I wanted to do, so it’s posted on my facebook for those who are on my list wondering what the hell that even is. And Kraziedog BRILLIANTLY edited it with the background music from the haunted houses. Thank you!! As for Slacker: cross me again…and MOAR HAUNTING!
And this will be a thank you to Amnesiac. He gathered us all together and helped us take some B.A. photos of us posing in our new hoodies (which hopefully we can get those soon so one of the pics can go up in our sig).
It was a very sad night because we knew it was our last, but we tried to make the best of it. No one wanted to go to bed, so in short, we didn’t. I gave a lot of goodbyes to some wonderful people the night before in case I didn’t get to the next day. At about 5 am I got up, packed my stuff upstairs, and came down for 1 final hour of loving and cuddling. Having the wives cry makes me very, very sad inside so I had a lot of trouble looking at them. Hugs were better so I could keep them close and pretend I didn’t have to go. Final I love you’s were given to Rhino, Euphoricy, and Skippy before I just had to walk out with my things. I slept for 6 hours on the way home (as per my usual sleeping quota), eventually made it home, and haven’t been the same since. 🙁
So as summary: thank you to all my friends who helped to give me memories I'll never forget. I love you! I wasn't able to mention everyone because...well my memory is bad and also this was long as it is. But if we talked, I find you pretty damn amazing. If we aren't friends on here, friend me.
And then there was NEST 2011. We all had the time of our lives. I made a conscious effort to spend as much time as I could with as many as I could, and still felt like I barely scratched the NEST surface. We had an amazing time and it has NOW managed to become the best gathering I've had to date. And honest to God, without all of you amazing, beautiful (and some bearded) people, I don't know what my life would be like.
Instead of straight up listing individual names, I'm going to try to remember names based on funny/wonderful/amazing/etc experiences I had with them. And then of course, some thank yous. 🙂
Thank yous:
The NEST Team: Without all of your blood, sweat, tears, and effort, NONE of us could have added this experience under our belt. Thank you so much for all you do, including giving up YOUR NEST time to make sure the rest of us enjoy ours. From coordinating all classes, bringing in equipment, ordering food, checking everyone in, making nametags and packets, pin and cover creations, inside book artwork and stories, to having things printed and sitting up until 2 in the morning putting them together, you truly have something brilliant going on. I appreciate and thank you for your every effort. And thank you Lee, for thinking of giving me pins for my portfolio. You didn’t have to do that, but it was awesome and incredibly thoughtful of you. <3
Pokey: Without you, I wouldn’t have been at NEST at all. You continuously volunteer every year to leave a day later and let me be your road trip buddy. And I can’t tell you how much this means to me. You’re one of the most kind and generous human beings I know (and that’s saying a lot, because we both know some good people)! You even let me take over the music playing! 😀 And somehow this year we managed to make almost the entire trip in ONE day. HOW did we do it?? And you delivered me into the house and arms of Skippy-wife. I can’t thank you enough for that. I love her and you knew I wanted to see her so you made sure that happened sooner rather than later. Thank you SO much for your company and generosity. There’s no way I could ever repay you. 😀
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And now for my play by play (or at least as much as my hazy brain can remember):
Wednesday:
Immediately after work, I drove roughly a little over an hour to Pokey’s place; we packed his car and headed out. This year I bought one of those FM transmitters for my ipod so we wouldn’t run out of music. My NEST playlist was freaking awesome. 😀 We managed to hit hardly ANY construction, which made the trip much smoother. As both of us didn’t feel as tired as last year, we actually were able to make it to Skippy’s house at about 1:30 in the morning where Pokey dropped me off. Wife and I made love on the apartment lawn, and then we gathered my luggage and headed inside. Pokey met her kitties and we showed him the hoodies* we planned on presenting to rhino and other wife.
*The hoodies were an idea that began back sometime in September or October. She and I thought it would be cool to have some IFD hoodies. First the idea started with just dinosaurs, but grew from there. Sadly when Bellas hit, we didn’t have the money to have them made, so we were determined to have them by NEST. At some point we thought our rhino needed a hoodie to commemorate his rhino-ness as well. We tried as hard as humanly possible to hold it inside and tell nearly no one. We wanted it to be a COMPLETE surprise so that neither of them accidentally found out beforehand. I even printed out a stick figure throwing up rainbows and a purple rhino printed like a pattern on paper so we could have the perfect wrap for the gifts. 😀 We were SO EXCITED about the gifts that we nearly threw up on each other 5 million times. Now back to the story.
Pokey decided to head out and find a hotel along the way. Meanwhile, wife and I sat on her couches and talked for what we thought was maybe 30 minutes, but was actually more like 2 hours. After, we cleaned the rest of her apartment from top to bottom. She continued cleaning and doing laundry for most of the rest of the night while I slept like an asshole in her bed. 😀
Thursday:
After her class the next day, we both got ready and drove to Slacker’s place to get him and y0ungmachine for the drive to Philly. Neither of them knew I was going to be there so early, so we thought it would be funny to not tell him at all, and see his reaction when he saw me in the car. EXCEPT HE DIDN’T SEE ME IN THE CAR! They all had an entire conversation outside and packed their stuff in the trunk before he came around the side and noticed me there. We had a hug fest, and then it was onward to NEST! (This was a huge step considering the day before we didn’t know what was happening with Skippy’s car because it was being fixed.)
Along the way, we stopped at a gas station for breakfast that consisted of chips, beef jerky, and pop. Ohhhh yeaaaahhh. Slacker and I traded beef jerky, but I told him the piece he gave me had to be bigger than the one I gave him. 😀 Someone (I forget who) noticed some beef jerky in Slacker’s Beard. We then decided that Beard needed to eat to keep up its strength as feeding off host Slacker wasn’t enough. Almost the entire way down we enjoyed Disney songs…till Slacker finally had enough estrogen and we changed the music (only sometimes of course) to something of his liking. 😀
When we arrived at the hotel, the first people we met were the smoking crew outside. Hugs, love, and moar were given. Everyone was lovey and excited to be there! When we walked in, we met some newbies, and they were a bit shy and apprehensive (I think), but totally opened up and blossomed as the weekend went on (which was awesome!!!!) Wife and I hung out in the lobby for a bit before deciding it was traditional couch time for us. Within a few hours, many more people arrived and it was truly beginning to feel wonderful. We all sat in chairs and on the couches and bs’ed for lord knows how long. Kered presented me with a box one of my favorite snacks: cheezits! (Yeah…doesn’t take much to make me happy.) We all ate them and I wiped my cheezit dust off on Slacker, because of course, he is my napkin substitute. We tried to get as many people as we could to go to a restaurant called Shady Maple. I had never been there before, but all of the native PA people I’ve spoken with say it’s the most amazing thing since my cat Walter.
When we got there I determined it was size of a small country. Wife told me beforehand that you could probably fit 4 large weddings in the place and not ever run into one another (and she was right). The buffet stretched as long as the restaurant. Being drink-woman, my favorite part was the machines that dispensed pop and cappuccinos. I only ate 1.5 plates because my eating schedule was so screwed up that I couldn’t manage any more (very sad considering I wanted to pack a lot away, like a fat snake eating an entire deer). Euphoricy-wife met us there along with Korastus and much love and hugs were had. 😀 At some point, Slacker brought back a bowl of jello and a bowl of pudding. We started egging on people at the table to take it and hide it when he was at the food bar. Eventually the intrepid y0ungmachine took his desserts and we hid them in Euphoricy’s lap. When he came back he knew IMMEDIATELY we had something to do with it. (I’m pretending he’s a genius rather than we are obnoxiously predictable.) Eventually he walked away, and she set them on the table and started eating them, pretending she went up and got them herself. 😀 He came back, took his desserts, and told us basically we were all dead meat - Euphoricy and y0ungmachine for taking them, and Skippy and me for being accessories to the crime. (We sat there laughing. GUILTY IN SLACKER COURT!)
After all bellies were full, we carpooled back to the hotel. Skippy and y0ungmachine napped like Adorables in the back seat while Slacker drove and we talked about music on the way back. We met with more people who arrived while we were at Shady Maple and stayed at the hotel until probably 1 am when Soda Bobinksi told us he was on his way to Skippy’s house. Skippy, CapnMad, Euphoricy, and I all headed to the cars so we could meet him back at her house. Poor Skippy on her 1.5 hours of sleep wasn’t driving so hot, so we all stopped off at a Wawa (I seriously can’t get over that name) for something caffeinated and some noms. CapnMad did an amazing job of helping me navigate the store for a hot drink and some cough drops (because I am store-directionally retarded). Once we got back to her house, wife and I came in the back door so we could quickly hide Euphoricy’s and Rhinos gifts. We let everyone in and gave hello hugs to Soda.
In a glorious show of amazing, wife literally was able to rip her bra off without taking off her shirt while sitting at her computer desk and threw it in some random place in the room. 😀 We all got settled in and set up people and bedding. The 3 wives slept in Skippy’s bed while the boys slept out on the couches. We all stayed up FAR too long talking into the night. The cats were annoying, so we locked them out of the bedroom. Apparently the entire night they used CapnMad as their personal Yeti playground. 😀 Poor Yeti…
Friday:
When we woke up, Skippy was gone in class, arranging affairs with her car, etc. It was slow going, but both Euphoricy and I managed to squeeze in our showers. I’m having difficulty remembering the EXACT order of things in the morning, but I know I painted Euphoricy’s fingernails and toenails. I helped her pick her outfit for the day (as if I needed to…cause she’s frickin ridiculously hot in everything) and we started getting our stuff together.
The boys went to a local store to pick up a few things for breakfast in the meantime like the gentlemen that they are. When everyone was together, CapnMad and I decided it was time to start making breakfast. Except cooking in wife’s kitchen is like going camping (you know I love you wife). There were no oven pans to cook bacon on (or skillets for that matter), so we did some ghetto cooking. That included wrapping serving plates with aluminum foil and trying to roast it that way (no microwave!). We also made pancakes and scrambled eggs for all. The founder of the feast was CapnMad, and he was generous enough to buy all of the ingredients we needed. So thank you so much for your thoughtfulness and kindness! And like the asshole I am, I left the entire mess in her kitchen to clean when she came back. We wanted to be at NEST and we wanted it BAD. So there was much finishing of packing and loading things into cars. (And of course wife took her fucking gross and stupid stuffed monkey with the belly button that looks like the mouth on a sex blowup doll.)
CapnMad took the luggage in his car and was the intrepid guide and leader since he had the GPS. Hypothetically, wife lives about an hour and 15 to an hour and 30 minutes away from the hotel so we should have gotten there at 5:30. We didn’t get there until after 7 pm!! That was the most painful drive ever. The roads were filled with such heavy traffic that we ended up taking back roads for most of the way. Soda drove, while the wives took over the rest of the car and, OF COURSE, rocked out to MOAR DISNEY!!
Wife and I, in the meantime, were getting SO EXCITED about the hoodies that it was beginning to hurt our inner beasts that we couldn’t let it out. Once we finally arrived at the hotel, we snatched the luggage from the cars and went in. This was the beginning of what could have been a potentially painful situation. The hotel wouldn’t let us check in under the card we had because they screwed up how they charged it and the card locked. Out of NO WHERE our knight in shining NEST armor came to the front desk and said, “You can put it on my card until they work it out.” That knight was Kered. So thank you SO, SO, SO, SO much Kered for doing that for us. You didn’t have to do that, but you saved our IFD skins so we could get into our room. But of course, we needed to do our NEST registration first. So I want to apologize to Brighteyes for being a rushed asshole and trying to run out of the room. I was SO EXCITED about giving them the gifts that I wanted to get out of there ASAP. Forgive me! <3 (Speaking of registering, A+++++ on the time it took to register this year! It gets faster and better every time!)
We sent a text to Rhino, telling him to meet us in our room for the surprise. After some waiting and settling in, we finally got them both to sit on the couch. I swear at this point wife and I were going to shit ourselves we were so excited. We gave our small speech about how it took everything in us not to tell them, and then gave them the gifts! Euphoricy’s was a rainbow tiger, while Rhinos was…uh DUH, a rhino! We all hugged and loved on one another, and then wore the hoodies downstairs outside so we could get some photos. (We did take a photo that didn’t show our faces so we could show everyone who is interested in seeing them on the forum. That should be popping up shortly.) My highlight during that was when a family of about 5 pulled up to the curb and a little boy looked at me and asked, “Are you Bowser?” OPERATION HOODIE A SUCCESS!! We wouldn’t get official pictures until later though.
Because Friday night was casino night, we opted to stay at the hotel and eat and hang there. The wives went to the main room and grabbed some sandwiches, oranges, drink, and desserts. By the WAY. I heard through the grapevine that Skulls made all of those chocolates at the dinner. Holy. Crap. THOSE WERE AMAZING AND BEAUTIFUL!! And I was a huge fan of the chocolate covered marshmallows. 😀 We huddled around what I’m sure was an end table and ate our food. A little bit later a rhino, kraziedog, and musicroxmysox joined us. 😀 It was so wonderful to be able to be in the presence of old friends again, I nearly burst inside from being so happy. We also had the pleasure that night of meeting even more newbies, and they were polite, open, and WONDERFUL!
I also heard (but sadly didn’t see) Lamashtu get kidnapped. She put up the most B.A. fight in the history of histories. SHE’S FEROCIOUS AND I LOVE HER FOR IT!!
Skippy and I eventually meandered our way back to the couches to talk to newbies and others. Midway into our conversations, Euphoricy walked up and said she REALLY needed to talk to us privately and definitely in our room. We were hesitant to go, as we were having awesome conversations. But when a wife summons you, you heed the call. Up we went in the elevator, becoming increasingly suspicious when she wouldn’t even start talking about the matter on the way there. Both wives went into the room first, and then I went in last. As I was about to close the door, I saw a rhino standing behind it. Wife and I both had our panicked moment and I went to run out the door, but rhino slapped it shut with his rhino-y arm trunk.
Fate: sealed.
*Eventually we made our way to separate parts of the room where both wife and I fought bravely AND ferociously until we defeated the weak and unprepared pair. I punched the shit out of Slacker, doing 1000+ points of damage every time, while wife tore the rhino’s damn HORN OFF!! Some say the wives were divided that day, but I know the truth. Wife was just testing the both of us to make sure our fighting skills were still up to par. And they are wife, they are.
*If Rhino or Slacker has differing accounts about our demise, do not listen to them. They are lying liars. They know nothing. This is the truth.
After the Slaughter of 2011, we headed downstairs to continue participating in the NEST festivities. For the wives, that means sitting our lazy asses back on the couches and talking to MOAR PEOPLE!!! We got some drinks and talked the night away.
Persephone walked around generously dispersing her AMAZINGLY TASTY cookies, and we all munched. But what is a gathering without cookie tits? Krazie asked Persephone if he could use her cookies to do the honors. She gave the nod. It was on. Skippy’s shirt was opened and IN WENT THE COOKIES! We gathered them all and put them in a bowl after all was said and done. Bella walked over later and began noming on one of the cookies.
Everyone: “Wait Bella! Those were cookie tits!”
Bella: *Looks at cookie, shrugs, and continues to eat it*
There WAS going to be pizza delivered, but the asshats at the place DENIED us. At about 4 am or so, we all rolled into bed.
Saturday:
IFD was FAR more together this round, but we still slept in super late. The other members of IFD found me sleeping next to the bathroom on the floor in the morning. A combination of broken air conditioning and other factors lead to my cocooning there. I woke up to a Rhino talking shit and wives lovingly rubbing my back to gently wake me. (I highly recommend this over an alarm clock.) We all showered and beautified before heading downstairs.
We were starvin’ like Marvins so it was time to visit the front desk to take care of a few things before heading out for noms. Along the way we ran into…NEW KID! New Kid (his now official title) didn’t know this at the time, but we were going to get him to go to a restaurant with us whether he wanted to or not. So all of us went out and fit (somehow) into ONE car: Skippy, Euphoricy, SnailShell, me, New Kid, and Homer28. After taking a visit to the airport (because the GPS didn’t tell us the closest restaurants were THERE) we went to THE BEST BUFFET! (Seriously, in name and food.) It was a Chinese buffet, and they had a sushi bar, CRAB RANGOONS (FAV!), a fruit bar, and other amazing foods. We snagged a table, ordered drinks, AND DESTROYED!! Euphoricy gave Skippy her crab in an effort to break it open with a fork (which was a lost soldier after she was done). Crab gore covered the table. New Kid came back with a plate full of oranges, and IFD commandeered them because we pillage and plunder. Orange gore covered the table. We bs’ed and laughed about every little thing before heading out to a Rite Aid for vitamin waters. After that adventure, it was back to the hotel!
By the time we got back, other people were pondering what to do for dinner. Sadly we were all stuffed so we opted out of the first Nifty Fifties run that many enjoyed. Instead, we got our drink on and enjoyed the alcoholic drank-noms that the bar provides free of charge during certain times. I was able to FINALLY meet a lot more newbies and enjoy the company of MOAR people! (The bar even named one of the drinks after Skippy!)
At some point Euphoricy was gone enjoying herself elsewhere, which left wife and I. We went for a walk and ended up, yet again, on more couches in the lobby area. Rhino eventually joined us, along with New Kid and Lee. We all had cuddles and good conversation. <3 Wife and all others ended up going upstairs to Reverend’s party while I went to find Gin. I met up with her and NG02 and we had a GREAT time talking. FYI ladies, his massages are second to NONE. The man just knows what he’s doing, trust him.
After all was said and done, IFD reunited downstairs and found a group hanging by the bar area. We walked over and joined them and I was greeted by Amnesiac with, “FUCK YOU!!” Ahhh me. 😀 We verbally destroyed Slacker and Rhino yet again, leading them to go on a rage and mash wife and I together between them like meats on a sandwich. The crew ended up getting hungry later, so after massive arranging and arguing, a group got together and headed out late late late. I stayed behind and hung and cuddled with a few before getting super tired and heading to bed.
Sunday:
I would probably consider Sunday the best day of all for us. NG02 stayed in our room crunched up on a chair for the night because he didn’t want to wake his roomies. Wife and I got up earlier and showered so our roomies could sleep. We woke them to let them know we were heading downstairs and the bathroom was free. Once down there, it’s a big foggy how it went down but I know we got some noms and bullshitted on the couches for a while. Snail then offered to give me my first experience in rope binding. And if I do say so myself it was frickin amazing!! I have some pictures that I posted to my fetlife that he took of his awesome job. I want MOAR rope binding! He also lent me some comics (have I ever mentioned that he is an awesome human being? No? Well he’s an awesome human being. If you haven’t spent time with him or his love Tropic, DO EET!!)
He and I headed back downstairs and I went straight for the couches so wife and I could chat. Mid-chatting, we looked up to see the Rhino staring threateningly at us. I told the Rhino to come closer because I had a secret to tell him…THEN PUNCHED HIM IN HIS EMPTY HORN HOLE. He became so enraged in the general public that Skippy had to drag him off into a room and beat him into submission. (I don’t know how this Rhino can take so many, but he’s stubborn and has a thick hide.)
During Rhino-beating time, I managed some wonderful cuddles with my NEST-husband Kraziedog (who is also the most fantastic, wonderful human/bear being in the whole world). After wife came back downstairs, we began the hunt to find 13’s phone and organize everyone for the food run to Nifty Fifties. Once we FINALLY got all of our collective shits (ew) together, to Nifty Fifties it was! We had a lovely time ordering, seeing Dino again, nomming in the parking lot, and just enjoying our last day together. When we drove back, wife and I lay on our bed and talked in the room for a while to digest that which was bigass burger. We left the room after a little while and sat on the couches, but I was lured upstairs by a Shark and his gorgeous bait. 😀 I dressed in my school girl outfit, and met up with them for literally one of the best sessions I’ve ever had. I am more than a spanking convert now…I freakin LOVE IT! I feel like I have to go on his forum visitor message wall and spam the words “Fuck VOLLEYBALL” so he has some incentive for Bella Bash. 😀
As I was getting my land legs to leave, we all saw on the TV that Osama was killed. It’s still a bit difficult for me to believe. It seems in some strange way he’s just been there for so long that I thought he would always be there. We all took it in for a bit before I went to our room to change back and head (yet again) downstairs. I found out later from wife I was up there for a total of 3 hours. (A pretty glorious 3 hours if you ask me.)
For the remainder of the night, we hung out with everyone, cuddled, ate noms, and did whatever we felt like in those moments. (Literally, IFD hid in the bathroom for some private conversation at some point that probably could have taken place anywhere. The bathroom seemed the most appropriate though.)
I also brought a hoodie I created (Boo from Mario) and made a video with the help of Kraziedog and Skippy of me haunting Slacker. 😀 It was something fun and stupid I wanted to do, so it’s posted on my facebook for those who are on my list wondering what the hell that even is. And Kraziedog BRILLIANTLY edited it with the background music from the haunted houses. Thank you!! As for Slacker: cross me again…and MOAR HAUNTING!
And this will be a thank you to Amnesiac. He gathered us all together and helped us take some B.A. photos of us posing in our new hoodies (which hopefully we can get those soon so one of the pics can go up in our sig).
It was a very sad night because we knew it was our last, but we tried to make the best of it. No one wanted to go to bed, so in short, we didn’t. I gave a lot of goodbyes to some wonderful people the night before in case I didn’t get to the next day. At about 5 am I got up, packed my stuff upstairs, and came down for 1 final hour of loving and cuddling. Having the wives cry makes me very, very sad inside so I had a lot of trouble looking at them. Hugs were better so I could keep them close and pretend I didn’t have to go. Final I love you’s were given to Rhino, Euphoricy, and Skippy before I just had to walk out with my things. I slept for 6 hours on the way home (as per my usual sleeping quota), eventually made it home, and haven’t been the same since. 🙁
So as summary: thank you to all my friends who helped to give me memories I'll never forget. I love you! I wasn't able to mention everyone because...well my memory is bad and also this was long as it is. But if we talked, I find you pretty damn amazing. If we aren't friends on here, friend me.
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For you, wife!
at the Bash 
