fantasy/reality disconnect

[here4stories]

As my name implies, I joined TMF to read the stories and role play. But I’m more of an outsider, not in “the community” of those who pursue it in real life through sessions, conferences, tickle parties…

I’ve noticed that most of the stories (at least many of them, especially those that seem to get recognition) involve hardcore noncon scenarios. It’s as if the interest is how hard can the ler tickle the shit out of the victim in the most sadistic, creative way. Maybe I’m exaggerating, but there definitely is a lot of this.

In real life, though, no one craves these tortures. Sessions usually involve safewords, boundaries, etc. I asked a question the other day about who has experienced true tickle torture - as in total domination - and even the most seasoned members said it was in limited format.

Why do you think we like unfettered sadism so much as bystanders when it is something we would never want in real life? Even as lers? I know As much as I like tickling people, I wouldn’t want to literally torture someone within an inch of their sanity.

 

[MikeMenace]

Our sexual fantasies tend to be darker than what we are actually willing to experience IRL.

To bring up a non-fetish example, there are dozens if not hundreds of romance novels centered around rape and/or Stockholm syndrome. "365 Days" is an example from my country.

 

[here4stories]

Our sexual fantasies tend to be darker than what we are actually willing to experience IRL.

To bring up a non-fetish example, there are dozens if not hundreds of romance novels centered around rape and/or Stockholm syndrome. "365 Days" is an example from my country.

I guess that’s my point. It’s an interesting phenomenon. Says something about the human condition. I guess fiction is also a good way to purge anger and hatred. What better way than to create a fictional character and tickle the hell out of them; like a verbal punching bag

 

[WickedTouch]

As my name implies, I joined TMF to read the stories and role play. But I’m more of an outsider, not in “the community” of those who pursue it in real life through sessions, conferences, tickle parties…

I’ve noticed that most of the stories (at least many of them, especially those that seem to get recognition) involve hardcore noncon scenarios. It’s as if the interest is how hard can the ler tickle the shit out of the victim in the most sadistic, creative way. Maybe I’m exaggerating, but there definitely is a lot of this.

In real life, though, no one craves these tortures. Sessions usually involve safewords, boundaries, etc. I asked a question the other day about who has experienced true tickle torture - as in total domination - and even the most seasoned members said it was in limited format.

Why do you think we like unfettered sadism so much as bystanders when it is something we would never want in real life? Even as lers? I know As much as I like tickling people, I wouldn’t want to literally torture someone within an inch of their sanity.

It's like most other facets of our lives. Many people fantasize about all kinds of things all the time that aren't reflective of what they want to do or are willing to do in reality. We play games, watch movies, read books, and listen to music with extreme themes and storylines that are interesting to imagine at some level, but that we don't always want to have as a real-world experience. In part, a lot of these are appealing to deep primal wiring that is not necessarily compatible with or reflective of the values of our higher levels of consciousness. Sometimes this manifests as a sort of cognitive dissonance where we have difficulty reconciling the difference in our decided conscious values and the more primal or subconscious drives and behaviors. I'm immediately thinking of how some people really enjoy gory horror movies, but also may have a part of them that feels strange about it because that sort of material is not at all representative of who they are or what experiences they want to have in the real world. Kink fantasies work like that, but with the extra erotic component. While we have the gift of a higher consciousness, a large part of our brain, body, and overall experience is still very much like an animal. In pure fantasy, we are connecting with that animalistic side and safely exploring it. In play, we are often acting out the parts of fantasy that have passed the test of our conscious values, allowing us to process and express that primal energy without compromising are core principles.

 

[C4urself85]

There are no limits on fantasy and what we can imagine. So our minds take things as far as they can go, doing things we would never do in real life like kidnapping celebrities, non consensual, torturing people to their absolute limits.

Fantasy is a safe place to explore these things. In real life, we have limits. And lots of them. So we play safe and don't do crazy, reckless and immoral things. Well, most of us anyway. Thankfully not a lot of depraved ticklephiles making headlines.

 

[hopefulscrambl]

I feel that it's not unlike the common fantasy of being a gangster. We're not fantasizing about torturing a man's family unless he pays his gambling debts, we're fantasizing about being Feared and Powerful and Able To Do Whatever We Like Without Consequences.

There's the fetish element here too, but I think the core idea remains the same. Fantasy lets you helpfully elide the actually unpleasant aspects of being evil, letting you instead bask in the "person of power" part.

 

[Jola]

I believe that the appeal of stories in general is that they allow us to break through boundaries that are strictly defined in the reality of our society. When I read a story, I want to transport myself to another world and escape from my own. I want to put myself in another person's shoes, to suffer with them, to empathize with them. A story in which everything goes according to plan and ends well without any incidents quickly becomes boring. And that doesn't even happen in reality.

 

[Miss_Gigglish]

I believe that the appeal of stories in general is that they allow us to break through boundaries that are strictly defined in the reality of our society. When I read a story, I want to transport myself to another world and escape from my own. I want to put myself in another person's shoes, to suffer with them, to empathize with them. A story in which everything goes according to plan and ends well without any incidents quickly becomes boring. And that doesn't even happen in reality.

I agree with you. Although some of the stories go way too overboard to be relatable, a little bit of crossing of what are 'normal' real-life boundaries is what make them spicy to read. Really amazing way you have put out your opinion @Jola

 

[yinzer]

As my name implies, I joined TMF to read the stories and role play. But I’m more of an outsider, not in “the community” of those who pursue it in real life through sessions, conferences, tickle parties…

I’ve noticed that most of the stories (at least many of them, especially those that seem to get recognition) involve hardcore noncon scenarios. It’s as if the interest is how hard can the ler tickle the shit out of the victim in the most sadistic, creative way. Maybe I’m exaggerating, but there definitely is a lot of this.

In real life, though, no one craves these tortures. Sessions usually involve safewords, boundaries, etc. I asked a question the other day about who has experienced true tickle torture - as in total domination - and even the most seasoned members said it was in limited format.

Why do you think we like unfettered sadism so much as bystanders when it is something we would never want in real life? Even as lers? I know As much as I like tickling people, I wouldn’t want to literally torture someone within an inch of their sanity.

I'm kind of your opposite, in that I'm not here for RP or reading stories about tickling. For me, it's watching video clips, and doing real life tickling sessions more recently. But like you say, I can enjoy watching other people and imagining myself tickling more intensely in fantasy than what I find myself doing in an actual session, at least up to this point. Maybe as I get more experience doing the tickling myself these things will start to coincide, but for now, I'm not all that sadistic of a tickler in reality.

 

[here4stories]

I believe that the appeal of stories in general is that they allow us to break through boundaries that are strictly defined in the reality of our society. When I read a story, I want to transport myself to another world and escape from my own. I want to put myself in another person's shoes, to suffer with them, to empathize with them. A story in which everything goes according to plan and ends well without any incidents quickly becomes boring. And that doesn't even happen in reality.

Oh absolutely. This is true for stories of any kind, whether they be erotic, fantasy, or children’s fiction. I just don’t always like stories where the primary hook seems to be blind noncon sadism. If done creatively, they stand out, but some of the best stories I’ve read are relatively vanilla.

One was about a soldier with a tickling fetish paralyzed from the waist down except for his foot. Because he knew he’d never have sex again, he asked his mother to tickle his foot in the hospital, which got him excited enough to orgasm. It was actually touching (no pun intended 😋) Another was about an attorney who knew she could acquit her client if she tickled her foot in court because she was on tape cackling like a maniac at a place other than the crime scene. It was hot reading about a powerful lawyer tickling a woman’s foot, caught between trying to deal with it to win the case and the frantic desire to make her stop. Hybrid noncon I suppose…

 

[Jola]

Oh absolutely. This is true for stories of any kind, whether they be erotic, fantasy, or children’s fiction. I just don’t always like stories where the primary hook seems to be blind noncon sadism. If done creatively, they stand out, but some of the best stories I’ve read are relatively vanilla.

One was about a soldier with a tickling fetish paralyzed from the waist down except for his foot. Because he knew he’d never have sex again, he asked his mother to tickle his foot in the hospital, which got him excited enough to orgasm. It was actually touching (no pun intended 😋) Another was about an attorney who knew she could acquit her client if she tickled her foot in court because she was on tape cackling like a maniac at a place other than the crime scene. It was hot reading about a powerful lawyer tickling a woman’s foot, caught between trying to deal with it to win the case and the frantic desire to make her stop. Hybrid noncon I suppose…

The appealing thing about a tickling story is that it fits into many different themes. It can be about love and tenderness, or about power games and even torture. Just like in movies or literature, there are different areas. And everyone likes something different. I also like to read emotional stories, like the ones you mentioned in your example. But sometimes I also like to read something a little harder. Of course, you're right, it shouldn't always be pure sadism. But it can be...