luv2bt&tickled
3rd Level Red Feather
- Joined
- Sep 30, 2002
- Messages
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Female keywords and their meanings:
"Fine": This is the word we use at the end of any argument that we feel we
are right about but need to shut you up. NEVER use fine to describe how
woman looks. This will cause you to have one of those arguments.
"Five minutes": This is half an hour. It is equivalent to the five minutes that your football game is going to last before you take out the trash, so it's an even trade.
"Nothing": This means something and you should be on your toes. "Nothing"
is usually used to describe the feeling a woman has of wanting to turn you
inside out, upside down, and backwards. "Nothing" usually signifies an argument that will last "Five Minutes" and end with the word "Fine".
"Go Ahead" (with raised eyebrows): This is a dare. One that will result in
a woman getting upset over "Nothing" and will end with the word "Fine."
"Go Ahead" (normal eyebrows): This means "I give up" or "do what you
want because I don't care". You will get a raised eyebrow "Go ahead" in just
a few minutes, followed by "Nothing" and "Fine" and she will talk to you
in about "Five Minutes" when she cools off.
:::...... This is not actually a word, but is still often a verbal statement very misunderstood by men. A "Loud Sigh" means she thinks you
are an idiot at that moment and wonders why she is wasting
her time standing here and arguing with you over "Nothing".
...::... Again, not a word, but a verbal statement. "Soft Sighs" are
one of the few things that some men actually understand. She is content.
Your best bet is to not move or breathe and she will stay content.
"Oh": This word followed by any statement is trouble Example; "Oh, let me
get that." Or, "Oh, I talked to him about what you were doing last night."
If she says "Oh" before a statement, RUN, do not walk, to the nearest exit.
She will tell you that she is "Fine" when she is done tossing your clothes
out the window, but do not expect her to talk to you for at least 2 days.
"Oh" as the lead to a sentence usually signifies that you are caught in
a lie. Do not try to lie more to get out of it, or you will get raised eyebrows "Go ahead" followed by acts so unspeakable that we can't bring
ourselves to write about them.
"That's Okay": This is one of the most dangerous statements that a
woman can say to a man. "That's Okay," means that she wants to think long and
hard before paying you retributions for what ever it is that you have done.
"That's Okay" is often used with the word "Fine" and used in conjunction
with a raised eyebrow "Go ahead." At some point in the near future when
she has plotted and planned, you are going to be in some mighty big
trouble.
"Please Do": This is not a statement, it is an offer. A woman is giving you
the chance to come up with whatever excuse or reason you have for doing
whatever it is that you have done. You have a fair chance to tell the truth, so be careful and you shouldn't get a "That's Okay".
"Thanks": A woman is thanking you. Do not faint; just say you're welcome.
"Thanks a lot": This is much different from "Thanks." A woman will say,
"Thanks a lot" when she is really ticked off at you. It signifies that
you have hurt her in some callous way, and will be followed by the "Loud
Sigh." Be careful not to ask what is wrong after the "Loud Sigh," as she will
only tell you "Nothing."
I hope this clears up any misunderstandings...
~ The Women's council for confusing all men
"Fine": This is the word we use at the end of any argument that we feel we
are right about but need to shut you up. NEVER use fine to describe how
woman looks. This will cause you to have one of those arguments.
"Five minutes": This is half an hour. It is equivalent to the five minutes that your football game is going to last before you take out the trash, so it's an even trade.
"Nothing": This means something and you should be on your toes. "Nothing"
is usually used to describe the feeling a woman has of wanting to turn you
inside out, upside down, and backwards. "Nothing" usually signifies an argument that will last "Five Minutes" and end with the word "Fine".
"Go Ahead" (with raised eyebrows): This is a dare. One that will result in
a woman getting upset over "Nothing" and will end with the word "Fine."
"Go Ahead" (normal eyebrows): This means "I give up" or "do what you
want because I don't care". You will get a raised eyebrow "Go ahead" in just
a few minutes, followed by "Nothing" and "Fine" and she will talk to you
in about "Five Minutes" when she cools off.
:::...... This is not actually a word, but is still often a verbal statement very misunderstood by men. A "Loud Sigh" means she thinks you
are an idiot at that moment and wonders why she is wasting
her time standing here and arguing with you over "Nothing".
...::... Again, not a word, but a verbal statement. "Soft Sighs" are
one of the few things that some men actually understand. She is content.
Your best bet is to not move or breathe and she will stay content.
"Oh": This word followed by any statement is trouble Example; "Oh, let me
get that." Or, "Oh, I talked to him about what you were doing last night."
If she says "Oh" before a statement, RUN, do not walk, to the nearest exit.
She will tell you that she is "Fine" when she is done tossing your clothes
out the window, but do not expect her to talk to you for at least 2 days.
"Oh" as the lead to a sentence usually signifies that you are caught in
a lie. Do not try to lie more to get out of it, or you will get raised eyebrows "Go ahead" followed by acts so unspeakable that we can't bring
ourselves to write about them.
"That's Okay": This is one of the most dangerous statements that a
woman can say to a man. "That's Okay," means that she wants to think long and
hard before paying you retributions for what ever it is that you have done.
"That's Okay" is often used with the word "Fine" and used in conjunction
with a raised eyebrow "Go ahead." At some point in the near future when
she has plotted and planned, you are going to be in some mighty big
trouble.
"Please Do": This is not a statement, it is an offer. A woman is giving you
the chance to come up with whatever excuse or reason you have for doing
whatever it is that you have done. You have a fair chance to tell the truth, so be careful and you shouldn't get a "That's Okay".
"Thanks": A woman is thanking you. Do not faint; just say you're welcome.
"Thanks a lot": This is much different from "Thanks." A woman will say,
"Thanks a lot" when she is really ticked off at you. It signifies that
you have hurt her in some callous way, and will be followed by the "Loud
Sigh." Be careful not to ask what is wrong after the "Loud Sigh," as she will
only tell you "Nothing."
I hope this clears up any misunderstandings...
~ The Women's council for confusing all men
