His And Hers Road Trip

[goddess_nemesis]

HERS:
Pulls off at wrong exit.
Opens window.
Asks directions from a knowledgeable police officer.
Arrives at destination presently.

HIS:
Pulls off at wrong exit absolutely positive it's the correct one.
Drives five miles into wilderness, still thinks he's right.
Drives an extra 5 miles just in case.
Finally rolls down window just to get fresh air.
Pulls up to a 7 -11.
Gets three hot-dogs, a large slurpee, and beef jerky.
Asks person behind counter how to get back onto the highway.
Gets back into car.
Laughs at the idea of looking at a map as he pulls away from the 7-11.
Drives down a dirt road with no street lights insisting this is the way back because guy from 7-11 said it was.
Almost hits a deer.
Curses the night.
Curses you.
Curses the large slurpee.
Drives and fiddles with radio.
Yells at you for suggesting the map again.
Admits he didn't want to go to Thanksgiving at your sister's anyway.
He hates your sister.
Ever since she called him a pernicious weasel.
He had to look up pernicious.
Couldn't find a dictionary.
Finally found a dictionary.
Couldn't spell pernicious.
Seethes at the memory of it all.
But she is laughing inside..
And of course you're still lost.

 

[Bugman]

Hers.

Takes an hour to find her keys.(which are in her purse to start with.)
Starts car.Gas Gauage is on E,which means enough.
Backs the car out of the driveway.(Husband has nothing else to do,you need a new mail box anyway.)
The change oil light is on,which means when you get around to it.
Assumes that turn signals must work just because you want to change lanes or make a turn.
Assumes that when the left turn signal is blinking,its obvious you should know she is turning right.
The rearview miror is for putting on makeup and fixing your hair while talking on your cell phone.

 

[milagros317]

LMAO 😛
Very funny indeed. 😀

 

[goddess_nemesis]

Hers.

Takes an hour to find her keys.(which are in her purse to start with.)
Starts car.Gas Gauage is on E,which means enough.
Backs the car out of the driveway.(Husband has nothing else to do,you need a new mail box anyway.)
The change oil light is on,which means when you get around to it.
Assumes that turn signals must work just because you want to change lanes or make a turn.
Assumes that when the left turn signal is blinking,its obvious you should know she is turning right.
The rearview miror is for putting on makeup and fixing your hair while talking on your cell phone.

But still gets to destination quicker than a guy. 😛

 

[Mastertank1]

Mastertank1's

Gets off highway at wrong exit because he sees an interesting building and wants a closer look.
After examining building up close, notices a wilderness road that looks like it might be fun to drive, drives down it for ten miles, enjoying hairpin turns and scenery.
Consults map, figures out scenic route from where they are now to destination, takes it.
Bends speed laws ALL out of shape, avoids getting ticket by scattering handfuls of caltrops in roadway, blowing all four tires of cop car.
Pulls into driveway at destination, sends GF in to say hi while he changes to spare license plate he carries for emergencies.
Still arrives ahead of HIS and HERS.