Ahhh, now we're talkin'! I've been out of the game for a few years, but I still know 'em when I see 'em!
THE TEXAS CHAINSAW MASSACRE (1974)
A fact of life: the original is always the best. The remake had more money and gloss, but it had nowhere near the intensity and downright balls of the classic. The title is self-explanatory, and the film's reputation precedes its actually bloodless reality, because it's not about blood and gore, but about the fear and visceral dread the film inspires. To this day, it remains one of the few horror movies unsuitable for CABLE TV...watch it and find out why.
THE BLAIR WITCH PROJECT (1999)
Yes, there has perhaps never before been such a divide between whether this movie sucks or doesn't, but the fact remains that this is one of the most innovative horror films in over 20 years. The entire film is a collection of lost-lost footage from a documentary crew that disappeared while researching a local legend about a haunted forest. Instead of ghosts and monsters, the film documents the complete breakdown of the crew and the eerie atmosphere of the maybe-not-so-empty night. While the same idea was done in 1980's Zombie Holocaust and the same year with an eerily similar but inferior The Last Broadcast, this one got all of the attention. Say what you want about it, but even those who hated it had trouble sleeping the night after the show.
NIGHT OF THE LIVING DEAD (1968)
THE granddaddy of hugely successful low-budget hit-or-miss horror films. For some reason, the recently dead are returning to life and attacking the living for food. A frail woman fleeing pursuit hides in an old farmhouse where other survivors gather, with a mob of the dead following behind. Although the surprising amount of gore is offset by the obvious social commentary in the subtext, the film is a masterwork of virtuoso camerawork and tight, practical editing. Remade in 1990 by effects maestro Tom Savini, but the original is the one to watch. Followed up by Dawn of the Dead and Day of the Dead.
THE EXORCIST (1974)
Vastly overrated film with outdated effects, but the premise and damned frightening makeup still manage to scare the bejeezus out of people today. A demon pretending to be the devil possesses an innocent little girl in New York City and causes enough psychic havoc to draw the attention of the elderly priest who exorcised it years ago. Slightly uneven, but well-paced, well-performed and looking quite well for its age, it's worth a gander for its status, reputation and ability to just get in under any skepticism you might have.
THE SHINING (1980)
After almost 30 years, the stories are obvious: if The Exorcist didn't scare you, it was this film that did. Auteur extraordinaire Stanley Kubrick took one of Stephen King's few good novels and turned it into an indelible classic beloved by millions for over 25 years. A poverty-stricken family accepts the job of caretaking a snow-bound resort so the father can get his writing career back on track; unfortunately, the hotel is haunted and the spirits inside begin to pressure the alcoholic father to murder. Kubrick horrified King by stripping the novel of almost all its context, the largest being the suggestion that maybe the ghosts are all in a psychotic man's head, but for once, it was worth it: The giant sets, eerie cinematography and Jack Nicholson's over-the-top performance make this one motherfucking tense film that gets in your head and stays there for a while. It also boasts one of the goddamned scariest soundtracks of all time.
THE HAUNTING (1963)
Fewer ideas are more frightening than a haunted house, and Shirley Jackson knew it; so did Robert Wise when he adapted her book to film. A troubled woman is invited with a host of others to investigate the supposedly haunted Hill House mansion in an experiment in human fear. While there are no ghosts seen, they are definitely heard, and all the time, the viewer is left to determine whether they are real, or all in one's mind. The scary part is the plethora of evidence suggesting that the former is true. It's a bit dated and the idea has been worn out in inferior rip-offs in the last 40 years, but when taken for what it is, this is a great little piece of work.
THE THING (1982)
Howard Hawks turned a Joseph W. Campbell paranoia story into a traditional sci-fi film about an outer-space vegetable in 1951, but John Carpenter took it back to its original sensibilities with this film that was much-maligned thanks to its 1982 competitor: E.T. A research station in Antarctica comes under seige by an alien lifeform that can assume the physical form of anything it touches, and unless it is stopped, it can overtake the world in weeks. Unfortunately, nobody knows who is human and the paranoia runs to white-hot proportions. This is one of the finest scripts I've ever seen and is probably even more successful in its presentation of suspicion than even The Treasure of the Sierra Madre. Great acting and particularly gruesome special effects that accentuate the alien's desperation when it's cornered.
JAWS (1975)
Yes, the shark is fake, but if you try to go swimming after watching this, you'll realize the shark itself is not as frightening as NOT SEEING it. A peaceful beach community is under siege by a massive and frighteningly intelligent great white shark just before the tourist season, and the meek town sheriff is at a loss as to what to do as the bodies pile up. The movie deals beautifully with its collection of different characters and personality, and often its as humorous as it is exciting. Great music, great setup, great script and great performances all around; but none of this deters from the fact that this is a pretty intense movie that shows that no monster is frightening without its shadow.
HELLRAISER (1987)
One of THE most original horror films ever. PERIOD. When a scuzball man solves a mysterious puzzle-box, he opens the gate to Hell, where he is destroyed by the Cenobites; demons who explore the potential of suffering through indescribable pain and torture. When his family moves into his house, an accident causes his incomplete ressurection and he uses his influence over the wife to bring him victims to facilitate his rejuvenation. Unfortunately, The Cenobites learn of his escape and command his neice to deliver him back to them alive or else suffer in his place. Ruined by cumulatively horrible sequels, the original and its direct sequel are the only one's worth watching (although the third did have some killer speeches).
NOSFERATU (1922)
This German adaptation of Dracula barely escaped the wrath of Bram Stoker's widow, who was incensed at the film's attempt to evade copyright law, and thank Heaven it did. A masterpiece of silent cinema, the film retells the story of Dracula with the dapper and sophisticated count replaced by a emaciated rat-like and taloned vampire who remains one of the most recognizable villains in film history to this day. There are numerous video and DVD versions out there and I imagine any of them may do, but don't miss this, it's a scream. There was also a film about the fictionalized filming of Nosferatu called Shadow of the Vampire with John Malkovich and Willem Dafoe, also worth watching.
THE EVIL DEAD (1979-1982)
A horror movie several years in the making set the bar for movie gore...and then raised it 20 notches. Using bizarre and effective camera moves and over-the-top physical comedy of the Three Stooges, Sam Raimi turned the story of five teenagers attacked by demons in the woods into one of the most pitch-fucking-black comedies ever. One by one, the demons overtake the group and turn them against each other until Ash (Bruce Campbell) is the only one left to face the carnage. Word of caution, this film is unrelenting in its violence and ABSOLUTELY DISGUSTING, and the cheapness of the effects only make it more vomit-inducing. Followed by Evil Dead II and the hilarious (good kind) Army of Darkness.
DAWN OF THE DEAD (1978)/(2004); DAY OF THE DEAD (1985); 28 DAYS LATER (2003)
Zombies Zombies Zombies...and not-really zombies. Dawn and Day are sequels to the original Night of the Living Dead, detailing the efforts of the dwindling human population to evade the army of zombies taking over the world. The original Dawn has terrible acting, low production value and awful music, but is surprisingly fun to watch and quite poignant in its satirization of consumerism long before it was popular; Day is a weaker film about civilians and militants squaring off in a mine compound while the Dead encroach on their territory. Dawn was remade in 2004 as a surprisngly effective action film involving zombies that scream and sprint after the living rather than limp after them. This was due mostly to the success of 28 Days Later a Dead-esque film where a plague ravages London, turning people into raving zombie-like maniacs who attack and kill at breakneck speeds. All of these films deal with the post-apocalyptic effects of Zombiedom and, even if they aren't the greatest horror films ever, they're certainly among the most influential.
THE RETURN OF THE LIVING DEAD (1984)
And finally, a often overlooked punk-rock masterpiece of horrifically funny proportions. Based on the premise that Night of the Living Dead was based on real events as a result of a botched military experiment, a warehouse lackey and his boss accidentally open a sealed container of zombie-juice and unleash the residents of a nearby cemetary onto the unsuspecting public. Only these zombies don't go down with a bullet in the head. As gruesome and horrible as the film is, it's extremely funny at the same time, and has deservedly established itself as a cult classic. This is NOT a Troma film, so dont worry.
