how do you bring up your fetish to someone your dating?

[poptart]

how do you bring up your fetish to someone your dating? do you just tell the person out right or do u let them figure it out by themselves?


the person im seeing said she has a sock fetish, but im pretty sure it's not a true fetish, i think she just likes socks in the same sense that i like hats in a non-sexually way. i almost told her then about my tickle fetish but i decided not to cuz i didnt no how she'd react but i dont no how i would tell her.

 

[Mike_The_Lee]

how do you bring up your fetish to someone your dating? do you just tell the person out right or do u let them figure it out by themselves?


the person im seeing said she has a sock fetish, but im pretty sure it's not a true fetish, i think she just likes socks in the same sense that i like hats in a non-sexually way. i almost told her then about my tickle fetish but i decided not to cuz i didnt no how she'd react but i dont no how i would tell her.

lol hey this might seem crazy but i was just about to ask ?, im seein this gurl as well weve been talkin for like a few months now and i really wanna tell her about my fetish but dont know how to break it to her so yea same ? for me if ne 1 whould b to kind as to respond 😎

 

[Michael514]

Well in my situation, the girl I was dating figured it out for herself. Apperently I spent alot of time worshipping her feet. One day a couple of years after we were dating I made a comment about going to a poker game. She asked why I had to go on our time. I told her it was a little fetish I had and that I liked to play cards. She then floored me when she said" fetish huh, like the one you have for kissing and tickling my feet"? Well I was cornered but I stood firm and admitted I had one for her feet. She couldn't figure out why I had one, but even though she didn't like feet she never really protested. I wanted to bring it up to her but I was afraid to so I did kiss and tickle her feet hoping that she would accept it or maybe like having it done. But understand I always had that fear that my fetish would seperate us, but until she demanded I stop I still did it. I can't promise this approach will work for every relationship. Anyway I married the girl I was dating. She accepted my foot/tickle fetish even though she hates the looks of her feet and having them touched, let alone kissed and tickled. I hope I was some help to you. I have been there and it's a tough situation to be in. Also I had two secretaries figure out I had a foot fetish. These two might not be fair to your question because we weren't dating. I just wanted to tickle their feet. If you are interested those experiences they are in the true tickling story forum titled,"Christmas party tickle", "Christmas party tickle part two", "one more tickling in the car experience".and "Tickling Laura again, dedicated to mel" on the recent page. These were two women who found out about my foot fetish and let me act on it. The story titled "Christmas party tickle part 2 is where I tickled this women named "Laura" and the second story" Tickling Laura again, dedicated to mel. is where she accepted my foot/tickle fetish and I tied her uo and tickled feet. I hope it works out for you . GOOD LUCK!! THANX

 

[TicklishLayla]

I guess I got lucky. The only person I ever admitted it to figured it out for himself. He was tickled me to tears one day, and when I was begging for him to stop, he said "Why? You like it." so I came clean about it.

We're not together anymore, but we're still good friends, and hopefully I'll get some holiday tickles after Christmas.

 

[Coffee]

IMHO i would say carefully, honestly and try to compare it to something they like.

 

[kcantankerous]

I dont know but I garantee your relationship will not last if you keep it a secret and also dont act on it. Thats because your fetish is so much a part of you that you belong to this forum. Therefore if your girl doesnt share this or you wont explore this with her you'll be unhappy, just alittle at first but than it will grow like a virus and soon it will aid in the destruction of the relationship.

 

[Hiryu]

Like this... "So! What do ya think about tickling?"

 

[CuteJill143]

its HARD to hint around

usually if you tell a guy that something turns you on they might like it only cuz a good man or boyfriend, spouse or husband should wanna do things to turn his wife or girlfriend on, they should be willing to not judge her and do whatever it takes to please her..usually i will tickle a boyfriend and try to make a sorta game ritual out of it and just hope i'll get tickled back =)..if you do it in the middle of sex it helps too, if a guy realizes you see it at a sexual level, he might like it, it might turn him on and hopefully he might see it on that level too..its hard and takes time im sure cuz most men hate being tickled..cosmopolitan even said it turns men off, shatters their ego and makes them feel "girly"..but like i said if he LOVES you he'll want to please you any way he can

 

[Tickler Bart]

how do you bring up your fetish to someone your dating? do you just tell the person out right or do u let them figure it out by themselves?

the person im seeing said she has a sock fetish, but im pretty sure it's not a true fetish, i think she just likes socks in the same sense that i like hats in a non-sexually way. i almost told her then about my tickle fetish but i decided not to cuz i didnt no how she'd react but i dont no how i would tell her.

Ok,first, let me correct the spelling of your post.
It really bothers me that people do not take the time to spell properly.
I don't mean the occassional mis-typing, but outright wrong spelling of easy words.

How do you bring up your fetish to someone you're dating? Do you just tell the person out right or do you let them figure it out by themselves?
The person I'm seeing said she has a sock fetish, but I'm pretty sure it's not a true fetish, I think she just likes socks in the same sense that I like hats in a non-sexually way. I almost told her then about my tickle fetish but I decided not to 'cause I didnt know how she'd react but I don't know how I would tell her..

Ok, now on to my comment.
I've discovered that it is always best to tell the person immediately BEFORE you start dating seriously. Usually by the 2nd or 3rd date you know if you like this person enough to reveal your secret love for tickling.
If she/he rejects you because of this then you know that she/he is not the one for you.
My opinion to your situation. Sit her down & tell her NOW!
Tell her that you do not like to keep secrets from her but you were apprehensive about this par-tickler thing because of what her reaction might be. It is VERY important that you tell her this. She may not like what she will hear but she will appreciate you being honest with her.
If you are in love with her then it is the most important thing you can do.

 

[The Sean Man]

I bring it up when the dating conservation turns to sexual turn ons and turn offs. I also make it clear up front that I don't expect my date to like or participate in my particular turn-ons....that's her choice. The way I look at it, if she's skittish about it, if I indulge her fantasies, she may reciprocate

 

[kis123]

I've been seeing a gentleman off and on for about two months now. He's not one of "us" but has some serious ler skills. I've been wondering if I should come clean or leave it alone. Unfortunately, he's not ticklish so I don't get my "ler" on but get to enjoy the benefits of being the lee.

I'm not good at exposing intimate details of my life. My ex took care of that for me by throwing my intimacies in my face during arguements. I simply don't trust people that way anymore.

In other words, I may never tell this man anything about my tickling passions. He might figure it out on his own eventually.

 

[CaptainQuantum]

To me, there's 2 ways of approaching this. One is to just get it out of the way as soon as possible in order to "weed out" the potential partners who just aren't open to it at all. I could never have anything serious with a woman who wouldn't let me tickle her or wasn't ticklish at all. Not gonna happen.

The other way is just to wait until you think she feels comfortable enough with you, where you can say "if she's not receptive to it now she never will be". As far as the actual how, I would do like this. Next time the 2 of you are having a good laugh over something, comment what a beautiful smile she has or what a cute laugh she has. And then say something about how you love to make a woman laugh and that you love to tickle women. The word "fetish" makes it sound kinda heavy but you can use it if you want.

Or another way would be this: I don't know if you have tickled her already. But if you have, the next time you tickle her (as far as she knows its just horseplay), when youre done tickling just say something like "I guess you might have noticed I have a thing for tickling." And then just gauge her reaction. If she doesn't seem to mind, lay it on her. The fetish I mean, not more tickling 😀

Hope that helps.

 

[Hiryu]

I'm not good at exposing intimate details of my life. My ex took care of that for me by throwing my intimacies in my face during arguements. I simply don't trust people that way anymore.

He sounds like a first class jerk.

 

[chrisheaven]

Ok,first, let me correct the spelling of your post.
It really bothers me that people do not take the time to spell properly.
I don't mean the occassional mis-typing, but outright wrong spelling of easy words.


Ok, now on to my comment.
I've discovered that it is always best to tell the person immediately BEFORE you start dating seriously. Usually by the 2nd or 3rd date you know if you like this person enough to reveal your secret love for tickling.
If she/he rejects you because of this then you know that she/he is not the one for you.
My opinion to your situation. Sit her down & tell her NOW!
Tell her that you do not like to keep secrets from her but you were apprehensive about this par-tickler thing because of what her reaction might be. It is VERY important that you tell her this. She may not like what she will hear but she will appreciate you being honest with her.
If you are in love with her then it is the most important thing you can do.

Perhaps I should point out that the phrase "my opinion to your situation" is not a correct use of English----for someone who is pedantic about the correct spelling of easy words you may be interested in taking a look at the use of prepositions in English- admittedly a little more difficult but well worth the effort.
From now on perhaps we should resist the urge to be critical about the efforts of others and use the forum for posting about the subject for which we are all here

 

[Tickler Bart]

Perhaps I should point out that the phrase "my opinion to your situation" is not a correct use of English----for someone who is pedantic about the correct spelling of easy words you may be interested in taking a look at the use of prepositions in English- admittedly a little more difficult but well worth the effort.
From now on perhaps we should resist the urge to be critical about the efforts of others and use the forum for posting about the subject for which we are all here

At least I TRY to sound somewhat intelligent.
I am neither an english major nor have any vast knowledge in vocabulary or prepositions.
I'm just pointing out how it looks when people read posts.
Besides, spelling is not prepositions. 2 different things.
When someone uses 'no' instead of 'know', that doesn't look good for the poster.
Yes, prepositions are more difficult, but I am referring to basic english.
I never claimed to be perfect.
When I wrote "My opinion to your situation", you are correct. I should have wrote, "My opinion to your situation IS THIS . . ."
And I can criticize someone's use of the english language if I feel it will benefit others.

 

[LoveSoles81]

Its easy for me, not on the first date. Maybe like the second. I want to bring it up before I get to close to a girl. If there the type that is like, "I hate feet" or Don't touch my feet" See ya later.

Usually after a few dates you start opening up to someone. This always works for me. If a chick has nice hands, she gets manicures, I would think she takes care of her feet. I always tickle my dates though. Maybe after like the second date, while your cuddling or fooling around I like to sneak a tickle in.

 

[sexypapi]

well

dude if you are dating someone just tell them...thats what i do!

no the real question is bringing it up to someone you are married to. havent figured that one out yet

 

[chrisheaven]

just be yourself and tell them-no problem

 

[poptart]

Ok,first, let me correct the spelling of your post.
It really bothers me that people do not take the time to spell properly.
I don't mean the occassional mis-typing, but outright wrong spelling of easy words.


Ok, now on to my comment.
I've discovered that it is always best to tell the person immediately BEFORE you start dating seriously. Usually by the 2nd or 3rd date you know if you like this person enough to reveal your secret love for tickling.
If she/he rejects you because of this then you know that she/he is not the one for you.
My opinion to your situation. Sit her down & tell her NOW!
Tell her that you do not like to keep secrets from her but you were apprehensive about this par-tickler thing because of what her reaction might be. It is VERY important that you tell her this. She may not like what she will hear but she will appreciate you being honest with her.
If you are in love with her then it is the most important thing you can do.

I appreciate your concern about my spelling.... but im 19 years old, it's called slang. Why write the whole word out if I don't have too? you still know what i am refering too.

 

[catapy_girl]

I have let my husband tickle me on numerous occasions. If it makes you feel any better, normally the occasional-whether incidental or accidental-brushup can cause a tickling sensation. Even the gentlest of foot massages can bring you to giggling like a schoolgirl. I think God made us ticklish for a reason. He figured we needed a little laugh now and then.

 

[CaptainQuantum]

just be yourself and tell them-no problem

Yes poptart, just be yourself like chrisheaven says. But for GOD'S SAKE use correct spelling!! 😱 j/k

 

[HisFlyinFingers]

On Topic: I usually tell the fine lady at about the time we're getting into some mildly sexual encounters. The fact is, if she's ticklish, and I'm getting hugs, she's going to get tickled at least once in a while. So, by the time we're hopping in bed together, she already knows a little bit about how I feel about tickling. All I have to do at this point is emphasize that it's not just fun and games for me, that it seriously turns me on. It's usually easier to go from "I like tickling" to " . . . a lot" than it is from "Hey, let's go to dinner" to "Oh, and TICKLING = SEX!"

Off Topic: Although it has already been mentioned, I think it needs to be pointed out again: you, Tickler Bart, are hardly one to correct another gentleman's use of our English language. I would go so far as to say that his posts showed better use of the language than your posts did. Although he spelled words phonetically at whim, your posts simply have incorrect, extraneous and improperly ordered words all over them.

I'm sorry to go off topic like that, but this is really a case of the pot calling the kettle a low-down dirty no-good pot.

 

[Nekoto]

You know. I had the same question a year ago, when I first met my current girlfriend. I went down to Florida to visit and stay with her for a few weeks. That first night after getting back from the airport she took her socks off and propped her feet up in my lap. I was too nervous to take action, but I got severely turned on by it. She knew from talking on the phone that I liked tickling, but didn't know to what degree. It took enough courage to tell her that I liked tickling. She didn't find it weird or anything, but she never commented on it. I was extremely backwards about my fetish too. I was scared to admit both my tickling and foot fetish. Well, she started the tickling that evening. We were watching an anime and she asked if I was ticklish and started tickling me. At that point I got more comfortable with it and tickled back and it turned into our first tickle fight. After a few days being together, I finally told her that it was a tickle fetish I had, but I refused to tell her about my foot fetish, for fear she would think it was weird. When she got a suspicion that I had a foot fetish, she would start sticking her foot in my face and saying if I had one to just say it. Eventually I caved. She helped me to get over my fear of telling people about my fetish.

Long story short, just be open with your significant other about your fetishes. Hopefully she will be understanding, like mine was. She was actually curious about them, and after I become open, she lets me indulge whenever I want. If she truely cares about you, she'll understand. 😀

 

[Tickler Bart]

Off Topic: Although it has already been mentioned, I think it needs to be pointed out again: you, Tickler Bart, are hardly one to correct another gentleman's use of our English language. I would go so far as to say that his posts showed better use of the language than your posts did. Although he spelled words phonetically at whim, your posts simply have incorrect, extraneous and improperly ordered words all over them.

I'm sorry to go off topic like that, but this is really a case of the pot calling the kettle a low-down dirty no-good pot.

Did you read my reply?
Didn't I say that I am NOT perfect?
Didn't I say that I, too, make mistakes?
My use of the English language does NOT have incorrect, extraneous and improperly ordered words all over them.
Correct ME. Please. Show me where I am wrong.
I will refrain from acting like an English professor from now on.

 

[mrfrench58]

This probably won't be the best answer, but my approach always varied according to the situation.

When I was meeting ladies via on-line dating, I would sometimes get the ultimate answer by playing a quiz of sorts. For example, I would suggest we play "10 questions" where each of us gets to ask each other things we are curious about. Of course, the big question would be among the 10. I would usually place it somewhere in the middle so it would not appear to be the most important.

Other times, if we were having a good IM chat, I would just ask and let nature take its course. I don't ever recall a time when the lady would act offended. The only time I recall a reaction even remotely negative was one in which the lady said she was very ticklish but hated it. Even so, she didn't hold it against me.

In another situation, I found out about a lady's ticklishness during our first phone conversation. Our talk was going great, she was acting feisty and laughing a lot. She made some wise-ass comment to me and I responded that if she had made the statement to me in person that I would have to grab her and tickle her. She laughed even louder and said she would wet her pants. Needless to say, we met and she got tickled. A LOT.

I guess what I am saying here is to relax and listen to your potential "partner in crime." Take his or her cues and go from there. Don't be afraid to make a mistake because if the person has that bad a reaction, they aren't for you anyway.