I did not expect this....is this normal?

[brainiac]

Hello all, I kind of have another topic related to my dating help request subject. [it is kind of long.....I like details]

I have a female friend who I met at a dating service back in march, we have become pretty good friends. As much as I would like the chance to date her we are open with each other and I have no chance to date her anytime soon. We had our usual sunday breakfast/hang out session today and she just left my house after we watched "28 weeks later" [aweful movie].

While she wanted to talk about my dating experience that I had yesterday she said she wanted to share a romance story with me about a guy we both know. Long story short.........I am very relaxed and more bold around her now. For some reason knowing she is "off the market" so to speak makes me feel better about not getting my chance.

Anyway [sorry this is taking a while], while we are watching the movie we pause a few times and one of those times we are talking about ways I can introduce contact with my date and when it is appropriate. She say for instance if she comes to my house, then I ask her "So if she is sitting on the couch like you and I are right now, it would be ok for me to do something like this?" at which point I lean forward and hold her ankle as I tickle her bare foot for about 3 seconds before I let her pull away. When she stops laughing she says "You just wanted an excuse to tickle my feet." I said "any chance I get, yea."

The movie continued and 30 minutes later she got up to go to the bathroom and then get her a glass of water. She sits down and I take the cup from her, lean her forward like I am pulling a thread or something off her shirt and then ask her "You have been to the bathroom so there is no chance you will wetting yourself if I do this?" I then reached my hands on both of her sides and begin tickling her ribs. That was sooo much fun as she started to laugh and bounce around desperatly trying to get away. After she almost fell off the couch I let her go and helped her back to her seat.

When it was time for her to leave I walked her to the door we said our good byes and as she turned to the door to open it I said "One more for the road." and put my hands in her arm pits and had fun. She collapsed up against the wall next to the door and I then moved my hands to her ribs as she was protecting her pits well sitting on the floor. As she started to try to kick me off her, laughing the whole time, I grabed her sandled foot and tickled that for a second or two. I could tell she was getting more determind for it to stop so I did. I helped her up and said "I am just playing with you, now have fun on your date today."

Now the discussion or question part. My heart is really pounding and my hands are shaking because I was having a wonderful time tickling her and it got me aroused [partially because I would still like to have sex with her]. I was not expecting this feeling of nervousness after the fact. Is that normal, that was my FIRST tickling experience [yeaa...I got one finally] and she doesn't seem upset about it. I am all jittery right now [and it is making typing difficult].

Did the nervous jitters happen to you the first time you tickled someone you find attractive even though you will never sleep with them? [man I have got ot catch my breath]

 

[tommytikl]

You basically just broke your "tickling Cherry"... Congrats.

Yeah, it is pretty normal to get excited after tickling someone, whether sex is intended or not. All the "activity" tends to get the heart racing anyway and salutes tend to happen.
I don't think her being on or off a list had anything to do with your reaction but more that you finally got to really tickle someone.

I say just enjoy the experience and IF the opportunity arises again to tickle her then go ahead but DON'T force tickling on her, or you won't get another opportunity for anything!

 

[ticklebunny 2]

Well yeah I believe it is quite perfectly normal. You just spontaneously tickling a woman for the first time on the spur of the moment and she was not offended and she did freak out and did not run away screaming. So that is a great sign and that is very encouraging to say the least. It is normal for the rush of adrenaline and the absolute natural high soaring feeling to last with you before, during and especiall after tickling someone the first time. This was your first time tickling a woman-you were not sure she would be ok with it, but you were brave anyways and it sounds like it was a great successful tickle session so congrats. Not many can pull something like this off on the spur of the moment unplanned. Sounds like you both had lots of fun.

So yes it is normal to feel excited and trying to catch your breath and feeling your heart beat faster-because tickling arouses you-tickling her even though innocently and lightheartly only for a little while-since you were attracted to her-it is going to be exciting and very arousing for you sexually. There is nothing wrong with that. It is to be expected. So congrats on this fun great tickle session and hopefully you will have many more tickle sessions w her in future. Long as it is mutual something you both want. Savor and relish this great feeling and super adrenaline first time tickle/ler rush, it is awesome!!! Nothing like feeling that rush the first time. So congrats. Enjoy.

 

[solescratcher99]

Yep. Sounds like a normal reaction to me. After the nervousness dies off and you become more experienced, you're body will naturally realize that's it not as big a deal as you made it out in your head.

 

[kis123]

I don't think her being on or off a list had anything to do with your reaction but more that you finally got to really tickle someone.

I say just enjoy the experience and IF the opportunity arises again to tickle her then go ahead but DON'T force tickling on her, or you won't get another opportunity for anything!

Tommy, I wish I could agree with you.

Brainiac, you have just placed yourself in your own dilemna.

-You're trying to establish a relationship with a woman
-You have another woman who you've admitted you're physically and sexually attracted to in your house.
-You're now starting to have physical contact with you doing the very activity that turns you on.
-You got turned on

Exactly just har far do you want to tempt fate before you actually go over the edge?

Please do yourself a huge favor; before this happens again, you need to make some ground rules about personal space in private. Whatever you guys do in public is going to have some limitiations, but having this woman over your house is a really bad idea IMO.

If I had a man I was physically and sexually attracted to in my life right now, our "hang outs" would be in public. Anything at home would be off limits especially if I knew he was seeing someone else. That's how stuff starts and how a lot of people (including yourself) can get hurt in the long run.

This is the voice of experience behind the keyboard and I know the consequences can be devastating. I could be off base with my thoughts on your OP, but I don't think I'm wrong. You can end up losing out on both women if you don't put the horse back in the barn, so to speak.

Oh, and to answer your OP; yes it's normal. But I get really nervous when I have sexual activity for the first time with someone, so I could be on the side of weird.......

 

[brainiac]

I have thought about that already. However my friend is comfortable around me and is not interested in dating me. [we have already talked about that] I am a very honorable and loyal person. I would never allow it to go any further than the kind of experience that happened. I am dating a 30 year old woman and we have our thrid date coming up tuesday, that in and of it self is all I need. I will never betray her even though we are not actually a couple yet. She is an independant woman and as far as I can tell right now, she is not a jealous type.

I in no way plan to tickle my friend with others around or anything that resembles regularly. If I am lucky enough to exclusively date the 30 year old, I now for afact I will not ever tickle my friend again as I will feel like I am betraying the one I love. I am sure people say things liek that about other sticky situation but my honor is strong enough I will not do anything to hurt someone I care about no matter if it hurts me or not. [Wow this took a slightly dark and serious turn huh?] 😈

Since I am not exclusively dating and I was on "cloud 9" as my friend put it I did not want to hold back from having fun with someone who is special to me [my friend I mean] I will not give up a friend for a potential lover, they will love me enough to know my frineds are good people or they will not be a part of my life.........Ok I am getting off my soap box now....I don't know how I got there..scary.

Anyone else on the original question or any extra advice?

 

[c7_assassin]

Sounds like a perfectly normal reaction. 🙂

And the fact that it was a girl you're not dating makes it a little naughty...I'm glad you had a good experience! 😉

 

[kis123]

I have thought about that already. However my friend is comfortable around me and is not interested in dating me. [we have already talked about that] I am a very honorable and loyal person. I would never allow it to go any further than the kind of experience that happened. I am dating a 30 year old woman and we have our thrid date coming up tuesday, that in and of it self is all I need. I will never betray her even though we are not actually a couple yet. She is an independant woman and as far as I can tell right now, she is not a jealous type.

That's good. I hope you know I'm not trying to accuse you of anything. I hated to be the wet blanket on your thread, but that scenario sent bells ringing. Sometimes people don't know how close they are to a cliff until someone tells them.....that is all.

I in no way plan to tickle my friend with others around or anything that resembles regularly. If I am lucky enough to exclusively date the 30 year old, I now for afact I will not ever tickle my friend again as I will feel like I am betraying the one I love. I am sure people say things liek that about other sticky situation but my honor is strong enough I will not do anything to hurt someone I care about no matter if it hurts me or not. [Wow this took a slightly dark and serious turn huh?] 😈

Yes, it was supposed to; hence my "wet blanket" stance. Cloud 9 is okay for a short while, but eventually you must come back to earth. Sorry if my post made you do it too soon. I wasn't really intended that way.

Since I am not exclusively dating and I was on "cloud 9" as my friend put it I did not want to hold back from having fun with someone who is special to me [my friend I mean] I will not give up a friend for a potential lover, they will love me enough to know my frineds are good people or they will not be a part of my life.........Ok I am getting off my soap box now....I don't know how I got there..scary.

Not really sure why you went there either. No one is supposed to exchange their friendships for their SO. But that person is your significant other for a reason so there should be some boundaries placed down the road that make everyone (including you) feel safe and comfortable.

Anyone else on the original question or any extra advice?

As for me, I'm done and hope your Tuesday date goes well.

 

[brainiac]

Thank you I am sure it will [at least I am sure now since she hugged me last time]. I knew you were only giving advice and not being mean. 😉

Quote:
Originally Posted by brainiac
Since I am not exclusively dating and I was on "cloud 9" as my friend put it I did not want to hold back from having fun with someone who is special to me [my friend I mean] I will not give up a friend for a potential lover, they will love me enough to know my frineds are good people or they will not be a part of my life.........Ok I am getting off my soap box now....I don't know how I got there..scary.

Not really sure why you went there either. No one is supposed to exchange their friendships for their SO. But that person is your significant other for a reason so there should be some boundaries placed down the road that make everyone (including you) feel safe and comfortable.

I thought you were suggesting that my date would get upset that I was tickling another woman, even one I knew long before her. I don't put up with jealousy as I know I would never let anything happen. I think that is what I ment.

 

[kis123]

I thought you were suggesting that my date would get upset that I was tickling another woman, even one I knew long before her. I don't put up with jealousy as I know I would never let anything happen. I think that is what I ment.

Honestly I didn't even consider that thought at all.

Notice I used words like "SO", "down the road", "boundaries." Those are relationship terms, not friendships or dating words. Should your date evolve to relationship status, some things will change and some will not. I didnt even think on the other stuff.

I guess both of us went a little off topic....I am sorry about that.

Now that I've inadvertantly but sufficiently hijacked your thread, I'm handing it back to you now!

 

[rhiannon]

It is perfectly normal, even if you had experiences before. I usually can't sleep after a session because I am so worked up, even though I'm totally exhausted.

 

[brainiac]

Any info is good info.

 

[brainiac]

Oh man...I thought I had finally got over it but I was just playing guitar hero and during a song that is 1100 notes long my mind starts to wander [most songs are about 400-600 long] and I started getting giddy and jittery all over again as if my friend and I were dating. I am hopeful I get to do this with my actual date here soon. How long does this normally last? I am having a difficult time concentrating and I have to work tomarrow. 🙂

 

[brainiac]

HOT DAMN!

I sent my friend a few e-mails because I knew she was going on a date with a guy we both know and I wanted to tease her a bit. [and finally find out I never stood a chance to ever date her as she feels no chemsitry] In one of the e-mails I sent her I basically told her I promise not to tickle her everytime she is around but it will happen again in the future, as long as she is nt pissed at me. Low and behold much to my suprise she didn't give me the "I really don't like that so please don't" responce I though she was. She instead said "You can tickle me again as long as you stop when I ask you to stop."

I say again HOT DAMN!!! I only hope the woman I am dating is as open minded....oh the fun I am going to have. excuse me while I get a towel to whipe up the drool............

This woman is the girl of my my dreams........smart, caring, sexy and very ticklish and lets me tickle her alot [I think she likes it a bit]...but I will never get to date her as she has no "chemistry " for me. I am stuck as the friend so I am going to just have to settle for her letting me do tickle experiments on her to practice on how to tickle the woman I am dating now. I pray my date is as ticklish as my friend......I will be with her a very long time if she is.