GRM13
TMF Poster
- Joined
- May 23, 2008
- Messages
- 107
- Points
- 0
Hey everyone, it's been a long time since I posted here. Getting back to the routines of colleges have kept me busy for the most part but what has really torn me is something that I have been feeling. I come here to tell all those who are willing to listen, so please if you have something in you mind tell me, I feel sadness, guilt and a bunch of other emotion both good and bad so I like to hear what others think. Now that this has been said, lets begin.
I had been together with my girlfriend (referred as GF) for more than a year, and we've always been there for each other, both good and bad. I really love her and truly mean what I say that I would had probably become a dropout if I didn't have her in my time of need. Just like she has been there for me I have been there for her and many occasion, from family arguments, to mistreatment from both academics and social dilemmas. Now this is were things get complicated, Realizing that she wasn't getting the education that she wanted for her career here she transferred to another university. We promised each other that we would still be there for one another and we kept in touch all this time. But now, I feel like I'm loosing most of those emotions I had with her, not only that, but I am falling for another friend of mine (known as G2). I actually had feelings for G2 before I even met GF, but she was impossible to keep in touch since she was a commuter in our University and not only that, she had no driver license so her parents drove her there (that meant she just when to classes, maybe see her for an hour or 2 and then when she was done she leave) I thought that I would never really be able to spend that much time with her, so I closed all those emotions I had tightly and then I met GF. But now she has gotten an appartment in campus and I've been able to spend more time with her and all those feeling I had forgotten have just come rushing back. My mind feels like it has split in two over this, part of me is a dreamer that wishes that I not only get together with G2, but that GF and me still keep being close (not as an item but as friends), part of me feel guilty since I truly felt like I loved GF and am ashamed of how I have already fallen for someone else, and finally part of my is pessimistic as in saying that this will never happen and I am just kidding myself.
The third is justified cause G2 has had terrible experiences with boys (stalker[3 actually]) so she is usually very distant of people, not to the point that she won't make friends, but to the point that if I guy goes just a little bit to strong, she will run from him and all chance is lost. I know this my sound greedy or selfish but I still love GF, but it's more of a love for a friend who I have complete and utter trust and faith and will do anything for them, and I also love G2, and want to be with her, eve if it means just being on the very edge of the friends zone while she finds her happiness from someone else.
I've lost sleep from this a two nights, and have talked about this with my parents, and my friends. but I want to know what people here think, if you think I'm scum than let me know, if you've understand what I'm going through lend my some of your wisdom gained from experience, if your still confused let me know so I can clarify all doubts. This place has been a place were people have been able to tell their fears and dilemmas, so I guess it's my turn to open up with everyone.
I apologies to anyone if this has offended them, I'm just fear of loosing both of them completely...
I had been together with my girlfriend (referred as GF) for more than a year, and we've always been there for each other, both good and bad. I really love her and truly mean what I say that I would had probably become a dropout if I didn't have her in my time of need. Just like she has been there for me I have been there for her and many occasion, from family arguments, to mistreatment from both academics and social dilemmas. Now this is were things get complicated, Realizing that she wasn't getting the education that she wanted for her career here she transferred to another university. We promised each other that we would still be there for one another and we kept in touch all this time. But now, I feel like I'm loosing most of those emotions I had with her, not only that, but I am falling for another friend of mine (known as G2). I actually had feelings for G2 before I even met GF, but she was impossible to keep in touch since she was a commuter in our University and not only that, she had no driver license so her parents drove her there (that meant she just when to classes, maybe see her for an hour or 2 and then when she was done she leave) I thought that I would never really be able to spend that much time with her, so I closed all those emotions I had tightly and then I met GF. But now she has gotten an appartment in campus and I've been able to spend more time with her and all those feeling I had forgotten have just come rushing back. My mind feels like it has split in two over this, part of me is a dreamer that wishes that I not only get together with G2, but that GF and me still keep being close (not as an item but as friends), part of me feel guilty since I truly felt like I loved GF and am ashamed of how I have already fallen for someone else, and finally part of my is pessimistic as in saying that this will never happen and I am just kidding myself.
The third is justified cause G2 has had terrible experiences with boys (stalker[3 actually]) so she is usually very distant of people, not to the point that she won't make friends, but to the point that if I guy goes just a little bit to strong, she will run from him and all chance is lost. I know this my sound greedy or selfish but I still love GF, but it's more of a love for a friend who I have complete and utter trust and faith and will do anything for them, and I also love G2, and want to be with her, eve if it means just being on the very edge of the friends zone while she finds her happiness from someone else.
I've lost sleep from this a two nights, and have talked about this with my parents, and my friends. but I want to know what people here think, if you think I'm scum than let me know, if you've understand what I'm going through lend my some of your wisdom gained from experience, if your still confused let me know so I can clarify all doubts. This place has been a place were people have been able to tell their fears and dilemmas, so I guess it's my turn to open up with everyone.
I apologies to anyone if this has offended them, I'm just fear of loosing both of them completely...
