Meeting people

[MrSinister]

Where do you guys go to meet new people? I’ve been trying the whole dating app thing for a while but it’s truly gone no where and really just made me kinda depressed.

I’d like to be in a relationship but I’m not really sure where to go or what to do. I’m 29 and male if that helps inform your suggestions.

Thank you everyone

 

[Ghostwriter727]

I'm pretty sure that I tried everything from bars to arcades, to hikes in the woods, to climbing to the top of the house and saying hey to everyone that passed by.😂

The best results generally come when I go to places that are interesting to me already.
-The irish pub watching a game
-the driving range banging some balls😂
-the coffee shop that had a soothing atmosphere
-just walking around a historical, or scenic part of town observing things.

Wherever I go I try to center myself on the perspective that I'm on a journey to becoming a better person and making progress.
That kind of a mindset benefits you, and the people that you meet; and it matters.😉

Its ridiculously harder now days because technology, and people with bad attitudes have made communicating and socializing way more difficult, but the world still needs another you..🤙

Hope that didn't get too deep, but "putting ourselves out there" isn't like it used to be, but we definitely need people who break the molds, and dare to stay mindfully present, and chase opportunities for growth, companionship, and just making the people around us feel seen, and heard.

Hope you find some places that are not only interesting to you, but to the people that you influence while your out.

Hope this helps a little.
Cheers.🍻


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[MrSinister]

I'm pretty sure that I tried everything from bars to arcades, to hikes in the woods, to climbing to the top of the house and saying hey to everyone that passed by.😂

The best results generally come when I go to places that are interesting to me already.
-The irish pub watching a game
-the driving range banging some balls😂
-the coffee shop that had a soothing atmosphere
-just walking around a historical, or scenic part of town observing things.

Wherever I go I try to center myself on the perspective that I'm on a journey to becoming a better person and making progress.
That kind of a mindset benefits you, and the people that you meet; and it matters.😉

Its ridiculously harder now days because technology, and people with bad attitudes have made communicating and socializing way more difficult, but the world still needs another you..🤙

Hope that didn't get too deep, but "putting ourselves out there" isn't like it used to be, but we definitely need people who break the molds, and dare to stay mindfully present, and chase opportunities for growth, companionship, and just making the people around us feel seen, and heard.

Hope you find some places that are not only interesting to you, but to the people that you influence while your out.

Hope this helps a little.
Cheers.🍻


-

Thank you for the insight, that does give me something to think about😁

 

[footfan69]

I meet the best people when we are doing an activity that shares a common interest, whatever that may be. The connection comes from the shared experience more than any other factor. If it leads to something more, so be it.

 

[nondato]

I stopped using dating apps because the people that I was meeting were not interesting anyway and because these apps are a huge privacy problem, for me. (For example Its legally possible to find Tinder profiles without actually having an account). By their nature also, these apps pushes users to provide very personal information without a nickname like here.

In general to meet new people I am looking for events (cultural, games, parties) and trying to put myself in a situation where is possible to speak with other people. Maybe try to find a local group connected with a interest that you have (a foreign language course for example, you can meet a lot interesting folks there.

 

[cletus]

My two cents will probably not be helpful. I always had a movement disorder I did not know was a movement disorder until I was 28 and from there my health has went to hell. If you met me and I wasn't experiencing a really bad twitch making me angry you might just think I was normal, but without Botox I wouldn't be able to function.

I always believed that getting with someone would happen once I felt secured in my life meaning having a good solid job with a decent paycheck. 2026 #'s that looks like 75-100k at a minimum. I'm at 75k, but solid job hasn't happened yet. I have yet to find the company I want to stay at for the long haul and often times they go out of business or sell a division costing me my job as an accountant.

With that about me out of the way I used to try dating apps maybe 2006-I'm not sure when but the movement disorder became a real thing for me 2010 so maybe sometime in the 2010's. I never had any luck not with dumping lots of money or time into them, but the half dozen times or more I tried I found the following things to be true: all the women are the same. There are no nerds because all the profiles say the same things like they like going to the game or hanging out at the lake. If you do make contact often times it's actually a scam from Nigeria or some other place. Sounds legit for a few exchanges until you get the my mother is sick and blah blah blah.

I find it hard to get out of the house to just go hang with people I don't know because I'm a homebody, my movement disorder, and I have immediate family nearby enough and 6 college best friends that I can see often enough that with my being an introvert is maybe enough. It seems like in this country right now too that you'd have to be careful for who you meet and their politics.

I know that I've been told that getting out of the house and doing something you love you'll eventually bump into other like minded people. That you have to put yourself out there to begin with. And just have fun without expecting anything out of it.

A book that might have a bad rap now, but I think it had some good points would be Neil Strauss "The Game" where he went inside the world of pickup artists and being an introvert himself learned how to score with the opposite sex but obviously it's probably better if you just learn human behavior from that and other sources as well.

And keep in mind that there is apparently a loneliness epidemic or so I'm told. So evidently people are not getting the connections that my grandparents generation had but obvoiusly probably due to how this economy has become and the strain it has been on the average person now versus what I presume it was like during my grandparents time based on their lives, and of people coupled with people being more self centered now than 75 years ago along with all the gadgets we can preoccupy ourselves with.

I know that it would be amazing to have a partner who likes being tickled half to death but who also isn't hard to get along with and maybe I'm slightly ever so slightly autistic or something as the idea that I could be with someone and that being in a relationship with another human being just has always seemed odd to me.

So good luck. I don't know what else to say.

 

[duderino84]

The thing is, it can't be about sex, and you have to have enough content to bond over.

First idea that comes to mind is conventions, but I'm not good at finding them for myself, and I don't think there are many around me.

Work is another place but today's world is "strictly professionally or else" so that's out.

Personally I just don't try anymore.

 

[MrSinister]

The thing is, it can't be about sex, and you have to have enough content to bond over.

First idea that comes to mind is conventions, but I'm not good at finding them for myself, and I don't think there are many around me.

Work is another place but today's world is "strictly professionally or else" so that's out.

Personally I just don't try anymore.

I could be around some conventions, I’m in a decently sized area

Work actually kind depresses me because I’m pretty sure I’m the only single person in my whole department😭