New Girl, Awful Feet, What To Do??

[maniactickler]

Jaba has it right. i think women dont understand the extreme importance of a certain fetish that men can have. its all consuming. ive yet to meet a woman who has those same feelings. women will overlook their fetish if they happen to find a guy they really click with even if hes not much into the tickling thing.

 

[MrPartickler]

There has been a lot of great comments and I appreciate them all.

I do like this girl, we have a lot in common. If you're a foot guy like me, you'll realize that its quite an important thing. So really what I am in is a crap situation. She's beautiful, has a great personality, and really likes me. But rather then have the slim and beautiful feet of my ex which I grew accustomed to for years, she has large wide feet that I don't find attractive. It just sucks. I almost wish I didn't have the fetish because I could be potentially happy with her if it weren't for that one huge problem 🙁

I think if my ex didn't have some amazing looking feet it would be easier...

Chin up, Dirk. Your situation is really no different than many others here. Feet, tickling preferences, whatever. There are tons of threads posted by men AND women questioning what to do if/when their partners (often through no fault of their own) aren't able to give them what they really want. Yours is a physical limitation. Others could be more mental or psychological (e.g., not into tickling or feet for some reason, or not "enjoying it").

Since I recently got out of a similar situation myself, I learned one big thing: The hard truth is that if you're "on the fence," you just don't know enough about yourself yet to make the decision. You're not sure what's more important to you or how much you want/need certain things. It's tough to admit sometimes, but we're all human so we're always learning.

I'd say give yourself some time to figure it out for yourself. And relax. Just be with this woman, and have a great time. Both she and you will have a great time too--provided you're actually in the moment and not obsessing about worst-case "what if" scenarios. Enjoy yourself....or "enjoy the journey" as they say. Give yourself a little time to discover just how much this really means to you in the context of what this great new woman (i.e., not reminiscing about your ex) has to offer. IMO, if she's that special to you, she probably deserves at least some time and careful consideration from you--alone--apart from some rash "break it off now" advice solicited from this anonymous forum.

Revisit the question after a month or so with a clear idea of how your life has been affected and what you need. Who knows? You might actually find more to like than to dislike. Or it could end for some totally unrelated reason. However, if the appearance of her feet is really something you really cannot get past, it'll probably begin to negatively affect other aspects of your relationship. So you'll have to let her go. But at least you can do so with the confidence that you're really doing what's best for both of you.

Good luck!

 

[LindyHopper]

Revisit the question after a month or so with a clear idea of how your life has been affected and what you need. Who knows? You might actually find more to like than to dislike. Or it could end for some totally unrelated reason. However, if the appearance of her feet is really something you really cannot get past, it'll probably begin to negatively affect other aspects of your relationship. So you'll have to let her go. But at least you can do so with the confidence that you're really doing what's best for both of you.

You're so smart! I totally agree that, at least in the early stages of a relationship, the argument of "don't waste your time if she might not make you happy" is overly rash. I've certainly been in relationships where I wasn't attracted to the person initially, but once I got to know them, that changed. If you bail too soon, you'll never know!

 

[P[a]pi]

I don't think there is anything wrong with not wanting to be with a chick because you aren't attracted to her feet. Just like I would think it's okay if you weren't attracted to her face or her legs or her personality or laugh or smile.

For me, I have to be attracted to the whole girl, everything. And I'm fine with girls thinking the same way.

So, my advice would be to find what you want. A pretty girl with nice feet, and whatever personality you are looking for. The girl you are talking about has 2 out of 3. You don't have to settle. You can find a girl who goes 3 for 3 haha.

 

[palladium]

From an episode of Scrubs:

Dr. Kelso: I used one of these on my wife once. She's a terrible snorer. She used to keep me up all night. I made her have the surgery but, of course, that just made things worst. But here's a twist: now, whenever she goes out of town, I can't fall asleep without the sound of that gasping, weezing woman lying right next to me. Trust me, if I ever met a Japan air-stewardess who snored like Enid I'd marry her tomorrow. But here's the point: you might find out that thing you hate so much is the very same thing you miss when it´s gone.

 

[Soda83pop]

Its funny the reactions I am seeing to this thread...if you replace the word 'feet with 'tickling' a thread of this type has been started here about once every six months since this place started. I dont recall anyone ever being called shallow for trying find someone who was into tickling, or even leaving a relationship because the person wasnt into tickling. But since its feet it's deemed by some as shallow...I dont really see the difference.

 

[Dirkman]

quick update here. So I almost came back with positive news because I did manage to sneak some upper body tickles in and she is really ticklish. But then I picked her up yesterday, she came running down the paved driveway.. barefoot. She's the kind of girl who goes everywhere barefoot. Probably my biggest pet peeve. It kinda grosses me out. I asked her if she feared stepping on something sharp to which she replied "my feet are so calloused anyway I wouldn't feel it".

I'm pretty sure you can all imagine that the final straw hast been dealt. Too bad. Nice girl. Thanks guys.

Dirk

 

[kis123]

But then I picked her up yesterday, she came running down the paved driveway.. barefoot. She's the kind of girl who goes everywhere barefoot. Probably my biggest pet peeve. It kinda grosses me out. I asked her if she feared stepping on something sharp to which she replied "my feet are so calloused anyway I wouldn't feel it".

I'm pretty sure you can all imagine that the final straw hast been dealt. Too bad. Nice girl. Thanks guys.

Dirk

Well, I believe that no amount of advice will fix this one and I can't say I blame you. I guess everyone has their limits. The good news is that the weather's getting warmer and since feet are so important to you, you can check them out in advance. But get rid of the ex-girlfriend stuff; no woman likes to be compared to the ex, feet or anything else.

Good luck in your pursuits.

 

[maniactickler]

quick update here. So I almost came back with positive news because I did manage to sneak some upper body tickles in and she is really ticklish. But then I picked her up yesterday, she came running down the paved driveway.. barefoot. She's the kind of girl who goes everywhere barefoot. Probably my biggest pet peeve. It kinda grosses me out. I asked her if she feared stepping on something sharp to which she replied "my feet are so calloused anyway I wouldn't feel it".

I'm pretty sure you can all imagine that the final straw hast been dealt. Too bad. Nice girl. Thanks guys.

Dirk

I support your decision.

 

[LoveSoles81]

Think of it this way, she might have ugly feet. If there ticklish you will still have fun.

 

[jaba]

It is what it is, Dirkman.....

And we are what we are, for better or worse....

 

[aurora5150]

Jaba has it right. i think women dont understand the extreme importance of a certain fetish that men can have. its all consuming. ive yet to meet a woman who has those same feelings. women will overlook their fetish if they happen to find a guy they really click with even if hes not much into the tickling thing.

i actually agree with jaba and most of the postings here. i posted eairler in this thread that if it bugs you that much then move on. don't settle. and i disagree with you maniactickler just a bit cuz there are a lot of women who would move on from a guy if something bothered her. that's not to say all women are like that or that all men are like that. it's a human trait to move toward what we like, not a male or female trait. and i for one will not overlook my fetish if i'm not happy with a guy. but overall i think the main point to everyone is don't settle if you're unhappy. i couldn't live if my man wasn't into tickling . lord i would go nuts just try to find what makes you happy and go from there.