Now why does this not surprise me?

[BigJim]

Dumb-ass

 

[Limeoutsider]

People are stupid

 

[TKpervert]

BigJim spares nothing to make us Murcans look like idiots.
We all know that the haggis is native to Peru, not Scotland.

 

[BigJim]

BigJim spares nothing to make us Murcans look like idiots.
We all know that the haggis is native to Peru, not Scotland.

That had me on the floor!

Actually, credit for this find should go to Biggles, because he was the one who found it.

 

[Mimi]

I must admit this certainly makes the U.S. look like a bunch of fools (not myself, mind you....I've known for many many years what goes into making a haggis)...but you must take this into consideration:

Here in the U.S., we actually make USE of our taste buds, and generally eat things flavorful and worth consuming. Given that fact, it is no surprise many people here have no idea what haggis is, since we'd never be fool enough to EAT that nasty concoction! 😛 😛 😛

Mimi

 

[Alex Warfield]

People are stupid

Leave the poor humans alone.

 

[BigJim]

Here in the U.S., we actually make USE of our taste buds, and generally eat things flavorful and worth consuming. Given that fact, it is no surprise many people here have no idea what haggis is, since we'd never be fool enough to EAT that nasty concoction! 😛 😛 😛

Mimi

This from the country who gave the world chittlins?

 

[Dave2112]

Actually, I rather enjoy haggis, but I'm a Scot.

We should put together a Haggis Appreciation Campaign with TV spots and such. We could get Krusty the Klown to reprise his great line in the RibWich commercials...

"Haggis. I don't mind the taste!"

😀

 

[Moses25]

It's Robbie Buuurn's night at the BigJim household, no doubt.

Me love haggis. 🙂

Cheers.😀

 

[BigJim]

Haggis is like black pudding; a dish that tastes good, unless your sensibilities are offended by the offal they use to make it.

 

[Haltickling]

Haggis = yummy!

Actually, the legend about haggis-hunting is used by some Scotsmen to pull the legs of tourists. We have a similar fantasy creature here in the Bavarian Alps: the "Wolpertinger". It even exists as manipulated stuffed animal in the Hunting & Fishing Museum in Munich, a hilarious crossing of hare, roebuck, beaver, marmot, and bird. Here's a pic:

And we use to pull the legs of tourists from northern Germany (no mountains there) by telling them how to hunt the "Wolpertinger": You need an empty sack, a candle, and some salt. Then, during a moonlit night, you place the sack and the burning candle on an Alpine pasture and wait for the animals. They will be lured there by the burning candle, and when they see the sack, they look inside for some food. As soon as that happens, you have to put some salt on the animal's tail, and it freezes instantly. You won't believe how many tourists swallow that story... 🙄

OTOH, Japanese tourists to Scotland regularly visit the "Sherlock Holmes Pub", because they believe he was a real person! 😀

 

[Knox The Hatter]

For a second, I thought they were referring to Harry Potter's tall, burly friend...but then, isn't his name Haagrid?
I'd venture a bet that all those people who want to go to Bonnie Scotland to hunt haggis share one thing in common: they listen to Rush Limbaugh 🙄

 

[Cav88]

I wouldn't call them stupid, just uninformed.

 

[Morning Angel]

I'd never seen an actual recipe for haggis before... man, I can't believe some people will put that stuff into their mouths... I mean, oatmeal is just disgusting😛 😀 😉

 

[red indian]

Hey come on BJ!!!!...........

.......thats very unfair of you, you are displaying exactly the kind of attitude that Americans detest in us Brits. So, ok, they are not sure what haggis is, big deal!!! is it really good enough grounds for displaying the kind of snobbish, superior, patronising predjudices that most Americans feel lie under the thin exterior of cordiality, which we rather grudgingly extend to them?

How about I stick up for the U.S. and turn the tables on your pathetic "Little England" attitude? lets see how you would cope if you had to answer the following questions about U.S. customs and traditions?

1. What is "Thanks giving"? and why cant the Americans wait for bloody christmas like the rest of us?

2. Do the Americans have any genuine "World Champions"? or can you get such a title free with 10 gallons of gasoline?

3.Why does it take a whole bloody day to play one game of American "football"?

4. Why do Americans think Bill Cosby is funny?

5. What made John Denver give up a promising career as a plumber?

6. Why cant cant Americans pronounce the words "Nuclear" "Aluminium" and "Leicestershire"?

7. What the hell is a "Fawcett" a "Seeing eye dog" and a "sidewalk" and whats wrong with the proper British words for these items?

8. Why are they incapable of accepting that the Supermarine Spitfire, Concord and the Harrier Jump jet are the greatest flying machines ever devised by man?

9. Why can they not accept the painfully obvious fact that the Dambusters raid on germany,s hydro electric dams was the turning point of WW2?

10. Can they not see that the British Empire was a great and glorious concept? and that it will rise from the ashes once again and soon the whole world will be drinking tea, playing cricket and straffing the Hun in mark 1X spitfires!!!!

 

[BigJim]

Re: Hey come on BJ!!!!...........

1. What is "Thanks giving"? and why cant the Americans wait for bloody christmas like the rest of us?

2. Do the Americans have any genuine "World Champions"? or can you get such a title free with 10 gallons of gasoline?

3.Why does it take a whole bloody day to play one game of American "football"?

4. Why do Americans think Bill Cosby is funny?

5. What made John Denver give up a promising career as a plumber?

6. Why cant cant Americans pronounce the words "Nuclear" "Aluminium" and "Leicestershire"?

7. What the hell is a "Fawcett" a "Seeing eye dog" and a "sidewalk" and whats wrong with the proper British words for these items?

8. Why are they incapable of accepting that the Supermarine Spitfire, Concord and the Harrier Jump jet are the greatest flying machines ever devised by man?

9. Why can they not accept the painfully obvious fact that the Dambusters raid on germany,s hydro electric dams was the turning point of WW2?

10. Can they not see that the British Empire was a great and glorious concept? and that it will rise from the ashes once again and soon the whole world will be drinking tea, playing cricket and straffing the Hun in mark 1X spitfires!!!!

1/ The economy needs the extra holiday.

2/ Only if it's a proper imperial gallon, because they even managed to fuck that up. 🙄 (Also anyone who is an American can get himself a WBA boxing title, provided the genuine champion at the time is British.)

3/ The poor darlings need a rest every now and again, on account of having to carry all that armour about.

4/ Because they're too afraid of being called racist if they don't laugh.

5/ Who? 😛

6/ Aluminium they actually spell a-l-u-m-i-n-u-m, so not only do they not pronounce it right, they can't even fucking spell it! 🙄 And you think giving directions to "Lie-sester-shiree" is bad? You should try one attempting to find "Luger-bur-uga". (Loughbrough.)

7/ Dunno what a "Fawcett" is, unless it's an actresses surname, but a "faucet" is their word for a tap. Strange really because they use the term "tap water". 😕 But then, whoever said septics were logical? 😀

8/ To be fair, I'd sooner be flying a Tomcat in a dogfight than a Harrier. Mind you, even the Tomcat is limited by having to maintain radar lock when using RH missiles. The software can only cope with Sparrow and Phoenix MRAAMS, neither of which are "fire-and-forget". At least the newest version of the Harrier can fire AMRAAMS which are F&F, and Niner-Limas that have decent filters so they don't end up locking on to some blokes arse when he's sunbathing. (Usually if he's lying next to a Canadian or British flag with military equipment of obviously Western origin nearby.)

9/ Even more important, why can they not accept that that's where George Lucas got his idea about Luke Skywlaker flying down the trench and hitting the exhaust port with his proton torpedoes, to destroy the first Death Star?

10/ Once was? It still is! All the industrial and mineral stores may be in mainland America, but their leaders and nobs all come directly from the British aristocracy. Or maybe they think it's just a coincidence that whoever the latest President is, he's always a cousin of the English royal family and we had to deliberately lose the War of Independance so we'd have a covertly controlled base over the pond?

Mind you, they think a bloke who lost the last election by half a million votes or so, actually won it, so anything's possible.

 

[Cav88]

Re: Hey come on BJ!!!!...........

.......thats very unfair of you, you are displaying exactly the kind of attitude that Americans detest in us Brits. So, ok, they are not sure what haggis is, big deal!!! is it really good enough grounds for displaying the kind of snobbish, superior, patronising predjudices that most Americans feel lie under the thin exterior of cordiality, which we rather grudgingly extend to them?

How about I stick up for the U.S. and turn the tables on your pathetic "Little England" attitude? lets see how you would cope if you had to answer the following questions about U.S. customs and traditions?

1. What is "Thanks giving"? and why cant the Americans wait for bloody christmas like the rest of us?

2. Do the Americans have any genuine "World Champions"? or can you get such a title free with 10 gallons of gasoline?

3.Why does it take a whole bloody day to play one game of American "football"?

4. Why do Americans think Bill Cosby is funny?

5. What made John Denver give up a promising career as a plumber?

6. Why cant cant Americans pronounce the words "Nuclear" "Aluminium" and "Leicestershire"?

7. What the hell is a "Fawcett" a "Seeing eye dog" and a "sidewalk" and whats wrong with the proper British words for these items?

8. Why are they incapable of accepting that the Supermarine Spitfire, Concord and the Harrier Jump jet are the greatest flying machines ever devised by man?

9. Why can they not accept the painfully obvious fact that the Dambusters raid on germany,s hydro electric dams was the turning point of WW2?

10. Can they not see that the British Empire was a great and glorious concept? and that it will rise from the ashes once again and soon the whole world will be drinking tea, playing cricket and straffing the Hun in mark 1X spitfires!!!!

1 Remember learning all about this in school, but I can't remember a single detail now.

2 I guess World Champions is just a more marketable title. Besides it does fir in a sense. There are a lot of foreign players playing for U.S. teams.

3 Where did you get the slightest impression it takes a whole day to play football?

4 I think he is, all in taste I suppose.

5 Don't even know who he is.

6 Your referring to the differences in U.S. and U.K. english. I've always known it the U.S. way, it's what I grew up with.

7 Nothing

8 What?

9 If you say so

10 I guess it depends on the empire, but history shows that empires never last.

 

[red indian]

Let me explain Cav.........

.......it was suppose to be a joke. It goes something like this, I take the opportunity to apparently humilliate and berate BJ for his zenophobic attitude towards the U.S. as expressed in his initial post in this thread. I then seem to be taking the high moral ground much to the suprise of my U.S. friends who become over whelmed at my "road to damascus" transformation from boring predictable U.S. piss taker to "Hand on heart oath of alliegence spouting apple pie making uncle sam".

My U.S. friends then expect to find a list of embarrasing questions about U.S. customs that will render poor old BJ speechless with shame and ignorance, and make them feel all smug and pleased with themselves.

In fact what they find is a list of questions which start off with a suprise, the list is in fact the opposite of what they might have expected. It starts off with a few gentle, soft jibes at the U.S. way of doing things and gradually reaches a cresendo of small minded, petty, nationalistic ranting which betrays my "true" feeling towards the U.S. I end up making my self look much worse than BJ and appear to committ all the crimes i have accused BJ of!


So, that is how to explain a joke, for anyone who needs guidance on the matter.........dont know why I bother sometimes....sigh...

 

[Oddjob0226]

Straffing the Hun!!??!!

Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha burp ha ha ha ha ha ha!

Good show old chap! I fell off my horse, dropped my Lone Star Beer and crushed my Stetson reading that one!

 

[red indian]

Thank god for the oddmiester general!!!.......

.....thank god for that oddjob! I thought i was loosing my touch.

 

[Cav88]

Re: Let me explain Cav.........

I knew it was a joke, I just decided to answer seriously for the hell of it.

 

[red indian]

ok..well thanks for that Cav........

....seems like the joke is on me then!!...but stop scaring me like that ok??

 

[BigJim]

Don't get too excited Indy, Cav's response to the "How American are you???" thread seems to bely more than just a talent for playing the straight man. I even asked him if he'd ever thought of being a professional limbo dancer, because everything seems to go over his head.🙄

 

[Cav88]

Ha, didn't get that joke until you mentioned that.

 

[BigJim]

Ha, didn't get that joke until you mentioned that.

To refer to the title of this thread ...


Now why does this not surprise me?


😉 😛 😀