Post a pun!!

[Bugman]

They don't have to be original, just really good (meaning really bad). 😀

I wanted to buy some pants today, but all the stores were clothed.

 

[ChosenofMystra]

I got one for you buddy 😀

Did you know I'm writing a Broadway musical based on the dictionary? Its the ultimate play on words 😛

 

[PhilipRJ_UK]

Always be aware if someone offers you a choice of shovels and asks you to take your pick 😉

 

[milagros317]

Ad by a gynecologist: Come to my office and I'll be at your cervix.

 

[jhop220]

I'm reading a book about anti-gravity. It's impossible to put down

It's not that the man did not know how to juggle, he just didn't have the balls to do it.

The roundest knight at King Arthur’s table was Sir Cumference. He acquired his size from too much pi.

A chicken crossing the road is poultry in motion.

 

[Bohemianne]

Ad by a gynecologist: Come to my office and I'll be at your cervix.

Bwahahahahahaha!

...........

Oooooooooooooooo! I love puns. They tickle my punny bones!................ 😱

 

[Bugman]

I got one for you buddy 😀

Did you know I'm writing a Broadway musical based on the dictionary? Its the ultimate play on words 😛

Ad by a gynecologist: Come to my office and I'll be at your cervix.

😛

1. Two antennas met on a roof, fell in love and got married. The ceremony wasn't much, but the reception was excellent.

2. A jumper cable walks into a bar. The bartender says, "I'll serve you, but don't start anything."

3. Two peanuts walk into a bar, and one was a salted.

 

[milagros317]

A neutron walks into a bar and asks for a draft beer.

"How much is it?" the neutron asks.

"For you, no charge," says the bartender.

😛

 

[C.A.B.]

A neutron walks into a bar and asks for a draft beer.

"How much is it?" the neutron asks.

"For you, no charge," says the bartender.

😛

 

[Xodlirv]

Did you hear Mr. Potato Head was in a car accident? He'll live, but he'll be a vegetable for the rest of his life.

 

[General Zod]

Hope this counts.

A baby seal walks into a club.

 

[Xodlirv]

What do you call a cross-dressing nun?

A trans-sister.

 

[Bugman]

Thanks to all who have posted, I love this thread! 😀

Two Eskimos sitting in a kayak were chilly, but when they lit a fire in the craft it sank -- proving once and for all that you can't have your kayak and heat it, too.

Two boll weevils grew up in South Carolina. One went to Hollywood and became a famous actor. The other stayed behind in the cotton fields and never amounted to much. The second one, naturally, became known as the lesser of two weevils.

 

[Xodlirv]

The baker had to quit his job to marry his girlfriend Edith; because you can't have your cake and Edith too.

 

[ChosenofMystra]

When chemists die, they barium
I changed my iPod’s name to Titanic. It’s syncing now.
How does Moses make his tea? Hebrews it.
I stayed up all night to see where the sun went. Then it dawned on me.
England has no kidney bank, but it does have a Liverpool.
I used to be a banker, but then I lost interest.
A cartoonist was found dead in his home. Details are sketchy

 

[Bugman]

-I used to work in a blanket factory, but it folded.
-Marriage is the mourning after the knot before.
-Corduroy pillows are making headlines.
-Is a book on voyeurism a peeping tome?

 

[Xodlirv]

The World Origami Champion is a guy from the Phillipines. He's a Manila folder.

 

[ChosenofMystra]

I thought I saw an eye doctor on an Alaskan island, but it turned out to be an optical Aleutian
The midget fortune-teller who escaped from prison was a small medium at large.
A backward poet writes inverse.
She was only a welder's daughter but she had acetylene legs.
Did you hear about the Buddhist who refused Novocain during a root canal? His goal: transcend dental medication.

 

[Bugman]

The World Origami Champion is a guy from the Phillipines. He's a Manila folder.

😛

 

[Xodlirv]

Quasimodo? That rings a bell.

My ex-wife still misses me; but her aim is getting better.

 

[Xodlirv]

Was Oscar Wilde? Was Gene Wilder?

 

[Xodlirv]

Did you hear about the fire at the circus? The heat was in tents.

 

[manga_geek13]

-PMS jokes aren't funny. Period.
-Energizer bunny arrested: Charged with battery.
-This girl said she recognized me from the vegetarian club, but I'd never met herbivore.
-A dyslexic man walks into a bra.
-I tried to catch some fog, but I mist.

 

[Xodlirv]

Did you hear about the stage magician who used hypnosis to help a police informant quit smoking? He pulled a habit out of a rat.

 

[Xodlirv]

How about the prostitute who became a songwriter? She went from bed to verse.