Psychology Today Article on Fetishes

[rwd1731]

I ran across this article in the on-line version of Psychology Today and thought I'd pass it along.

http://www.psychologytoday.com/conditions/fetishism.html

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rwd1731

 

[Horatio]

Wow, we are depraved!!

Studies show that fetishists have poorly develop social skills, are isolated in their lives and have a diminished capacity for establishing intimacy.

n the far more common cases, involving males, the patterns suggest that causes stem from doubts about ones own masculinity, potency, and a fear of rejection and humiliation.

Or masturbation training might focus on separating pleasure in masturbation and climax from the deviant behavior.

Wow, I am such a pathetic pansy of a man that I must be trained to masturbate correctly!

Great find, I love ready these studies (honestly!)

 

[aurora5150]

just my own thoughts

as a psychology student i found that article to be extreamly lacking in an exploration of all those fetishes it named. the problem is it lookes at a fetish as if it were a bad thing. fetishes, or anything that gives you pleasure is a good thing. and as long as you're not hurting anyone who cares?

i totally understand that this is a private thing because for me at least the only people that know i'm into this are those that share the same interest. and just to let you know paychology today is not a reptuable sourse. if i were to use it as a reference in a paper i'd be a laughing stock with my professor. and i say this not to counter the original post but please don't let an "article" like this ever impede what you like and what turns you on. cuz when it comes down to it we all have our little fetishes. and they are perfectly healthy. okay i'll stop now. 🙂

 

[slacker2114]

This is one of the many reasons I believe a lot of this new psychology stuff is just drivel. Every aspect of a person's life is now an "issue" of some sort of deviant behavior. It's because of crap like this that people are really getting messed up because they read this garbage and start to believe that what was once a normal urge to them is now a sickness and they need help.

I have a tickling fetish, a foot fetish, and I enjoy sex with women and guess what? THERE'S NOTHING WRONG WITH ME! I work, pay bills, have friends. Wow, what a deviant I am.

This actually brings to mind something I read in the Satanic Bible about indulgence vs. compulsion. Indulgence is healthy because it means you're enjoying yourself with whatever it is that you enjoy, including sexual fetishes, provided you harm no one. Compulsion is caused by frustration (i.e. a society that looks down upon whatever it is you like) and causes the person into situations where he feels compelled, almost against his will, to act out these desires and can result in someone getting hurt.

Fetishes are a prime example of things society looks down upon and people are made to feel as if they are perverts and cause more problems because of the compulsions these people now feel. If society would just live and let live and allow people to indulge themselves (again, provided they hurt no one), then all this psychobabble bullshit would be exposed for exactly what it is.

 

[Redmage]

For whatever it's worth, the article seems to be focusing on pathological manifestations of fetishism. It notes as one of the diagnostic criteria, "The fantasies, sexual urges or behaviors cause significant distress or impair social, occupational or personal functioning." In other words, if that condition isn't met, then there can be no diagnosis of pathological fetishism. This is the standard "clinical significance" criterion that is attached to almost all psychological diagnoses. The article also notes that some degree of fetishistic attraction is common in "normal" people.

I think they could have been more clear in distinguishing between pathological and non-pathological fetishism, but they probably just took the distinction for granted. I think if one reads the article carefully it's clear that they aren't talking about most of us.

 

[ChosenofMystra]

BAH! *waves hand dismissivly* I exhibit none of those traits. I'm quite outgoing and social, I'm quite secure in my masculinity/sexuality and I never knew there was a wrong way to masturbate. And somehow I'm still deviant because I have a tickling fetish? This article makes me giggle. I and from what I've seen, everyone else on this board is perfecty normal and can fuction quite well in society.

Perhaps I'm the exception to the rule? Or they just choose to study a bunch of awkward wallflowers

 

[Skipadeedoodah]

i think ya'll are misunderstanding...

I'm pretty sure what they're trying to say is that having a fetish is common, it's when it interferes with your every day life, you don't go out, skip work, or do the crazy things we read about once in awhile like sneaking into people's homes in the middle of the night to tickle their feet, that it becomes an issue because, let's face it, these are all very unhealthy behaviors. If you have a fetish, like most of us do, and still function in your every day life, go to work, have meaningful relationships, and don't stalk people in the middle of the night, lol it's just a part of your natural sexuality and that's a-okay 🙂
(yeah i'm a psych major LOL)

 

[nenezinho]

The term "fetishism" was coined in the late 1800s. It originates from the Portuguese word feitico, which means "obsessive fascination".

But it´s nice! maybe we invented fetishes here in portugal so please ladys come and visit me in Lisbon to se how a true descendent from the creators of our fetish will tickle you 😉

Fetishism is characterized as a disorder when there is a pathological assignment of sexual fixation, fantasies or behaviors toward an inanimate object -- frequently an item of clothing -- such as underclothing or a high-heeled shoe -- or to nongenital body parts -- such as the foot.

Clearly a biased opinion! So if it´s a fetish when it´s about nongenital body parts why the hell does he/she fails to refer breasts which are the most comon fetish?? Or are we considering breast as genitals in medicine these days????? 😕 😕 😕

Fetishism is a more common occurrence in males, and the causes are not clearly known

Really??? then the paranoia girls have for stong arms, tight ass, strong legs and others are clearly all genital.....yeahhh...sure!!!!

Nearly all fetishists are male, though some women also exhibit fetishism.

Again!!! are we sensing here some very disturbed female??? 😉 humm she might need to know a lot of our fellow female frieds here on the tmf! maybe get a severe "punishment" by them for totally negleting their existence 🙂

 

[Redmage]

There´s no such word in portuguese. Actually the word "feitiço" is correctly translated to english as "spell"...you know...magic stuff 🙂

So enough said about the knowledge of the author/s 😛

The paper is about half right. Here's the etymology of "fetish" as provided by Webster's dictionary: "Etymology: French & Portuguese; French fétiche, from Portuguese feitiço, from feitiço artificial, false, from Latin facticius factitious."

So the direct ancestor of the English word is a French term, which was derived in turn from the Portuguese word you mentioned. Apparently one meaning of that word in Portuguese is "something fake or wrong," which could fit in with the meaning you mentioned of a spell, enchantment, or illusion.

The word "fetish" in English can also refer to a primitive superstition, usually associated with an object of some kind. A lucky charm would be a "fetish" in that sense. My guess is that it came to be associated with sex with the meaning of a "false object" of sexual attraction: something that substitutes for a proper or healthy focus.

Interesting language research aside, though, I think we're getting upset over nothing here. It looks to me as though the author is clear on the difference between healthy and unhealthy fetishes, and is talking only about the unhealthy sort.

 

[nenezinho]

My compliments to you Redmage!

You did a great job! Actually I was already changing my post as I started reallizing where this word might be coming from.

Still, I do believe that both french and portuguese should have a comon origin in latin. Because it´s not usual to have a portuguese word being adopted by another european country around 1800....specially not so close to napoleon and the revolution. The oposite would be more likely as france was kind of isolated and seen as an example by the more liberal in society (also in portugal lots of french words where adopted around this time).

I was not upset with the article, despite I still find a bit biased it´s original description. I can get the point in the following parts about characteristics and the difference bettween healthy and not.

Still...I was mostly trying to be funny and inviting some nice ladys to come and visit Lisbon 😉

P.S.: aditionaly, our word "feitiço" is almost the same as your "spell". Like yours, we can relate "feitiço" to ilusion as with being under a spell or something. Maybe "feitiço" also had a relation to something fake or wrong in the dark times of inquisition but is surely doesn´t have that meaning anymore and probably only had it for a short time during midle age.

 

[vegantickle]

This whole thing does make me wonder again...

This whole thing does make me wonder again if, when presented to the public, it is not prefered to relate to it as a "kink" than a "fetish".

Somehow I am starting to think that "kink" may have a more positive, "adventurous" meaning to people than fetish (which is.. "devint")...

 

[milagros317]

Typical article, trying to tell me that I have a problem. I don't, I'm happy induging my interests, which they call fetishes. I don't need a psychologist to tell me why I like to do what I like to do. I just need willing adult partners to do it with. 😀

 

[cloudgazer2k]

wow...interesting.
what i find funny is how "fetishes" can also describe objects of power. native american shamans used fetishes to bless hunts, fights and whatnot. hell, even rosary beads can be considered a fetish since it is linked to religious power.
and i've never had an issue with proper masturbation....

 

[LItickleree]

treatment? 🙄 please, they act like its a disease

 

[cloudgazer2k]

jeeze...if some quack told me he could cure me of my fetishes...them pills would become suppositories.
hell, some doctors have recently admitted that more than half of the reported depression cases are just teens and young adults going through the usual angst...and they were given happy pills! you can't cure human thought.

 

[Red_Feather]

I've noticed something of a change happening with regards to the use of the word 'fetish'. From what I've seen, more and more people are using it to describe something non-sexual.

On facebook, I decided to search the word 'fetish', just to see what would come up. There were a surprising amount of people putting random things like: 'I have a serious LOST fetish' in their description. A completely non-sexual use of the word fetish (unless they were saying they get turned on by the t.v. show, which I doubt).

Just something that made me think.

 

[Redmage]

treatment? 🙄 please, they act like its a disease

As I've said several times now, they're referring to fetishes as a disorder only when they cause serious problems for the person who has them. And in that case they ARE a disorder.

Really, folks are getting way overwrought here.

 

[rajee]

 

[Vexis]

treatment? 🙄 please, they act like its a disease

seriously. i mean, you think Chemo or a dosage of Motrin could end fetishes. that, and everything else everyone has said, makes me realise the auther is an idiot.

 

[melbtickler]

Twaddle

Thanks for posting an interesting article as it has just underlined what I've always believed....I'm normal. This twaddle must have been written by a half-baked shrink along with the other kooks who completed the studies.

I quote, "Studies show that fetishists have poorly develop social skills, are isolated in their lives and have a diminished capacity for establishing intimacy."

This is pure fiction and the I would say that the research covered a minute sample size. I am the complete antithesis of that ludicrous statement as I am sure many here are.

I have a foot fetish and a tickling fetish. Let's look at the foot aspect. I have no idea why I love feet but I just do. Mainstream society thinks this is nuts.
However, mainstream society thinks it is normal for men to have a thing for breasts. Breasts are seen as sexual.
Hmmm hang on...don't get me wrong I love breasts but aren't breasts what babies suck on for food? The baby grows into a man then continues to suck the breasts of women when he starts dating. Why is this not odd? Yet a foot fetish is.
It's to do with who is in the majority and they decide what is "normal".
People with green eyes are in the minority does this make them not "normal"?
It's all very silly and these shrinks are causing more harm than good with such matters. If I went to see a shrink about my ticklish needs he's probably drug me to the eye-balls which no doubt shortens my life-span.

Keep on tickling I say!

 

[Redmage]

Thanks for posting an interesting article as it has just underlined what I've always believed....I'm normal. This twaddle must have been written by a half-baked shrink along with the other kooks who completed the studies.

As several people have pointed out on this thread, "fetish" doesn't usually mean the same thing to a psychologist that it does to us. The word is used in the article specifically to refer to people for whom an unusual sexual interest really is a problem, due to obsession or other issues. The article notes that there are many normal people with these interests for whom they are not a problem, but the article isn't about those people. So there's no need to condemn them as though they don't know what they're talking about.

 

[melbtickler]

Yes, that's true, but it's not too hard to read between the lines.

 

[the wiz]

My therapist told me the same thing, and wanted me to see her long term, but how serious can I take late a 40ish y.o. woman, not dating anyone, No TV and just sit home and reads. That last sessions with her last all of 2 visits

 

[WorkInProgress]

Note to The Wiz: I'm not sure your appraisal of reasons why not to take this woman seriously follow, but, when it comes to therapists, it's important to know that there are those who think we all need to be cured of our kinks (I've encountered them), and those who can accept us as we are and let us be the judge of what our therapy goals are and of what aspects of our lives we consider to be okay as they are. There is now a set of listings for "kink-aware professionals," including therapists, and also including physicians who won't freak out at the sight of marks from a patient's having been whipped or spanked. Here's the link, http://www.ncsfreedom.org/kap/ , and if by chance you're in New York City I'll be glad to give you a referral to my most recent therapist--I've only stopped going to her because I'm moving--who is open-minded about these things. It's not that she has a special background in kinks; she's simply respectful of them as she's told about them.


And to everybody, for that matter: The link might interest you. http://www.ncsfreedom.org/kap/

 

[the wiz]

WorkinProgress:
No, I live in st. louis where people believe they have a God given right to tell you what to do, where to go, what to think. .thank you for your advice but my therapist is full of shit, i went there for marriage counseling not for someone to change my whole existing and being to fit what she believe I should be.

People always like to belittle what they don’t understand, or afraid of, they never take the time to know anyone just form an opinion according to what someone else said. Look at shows like Law n Order, CSI, …. When they did shows about people with foot fetishes, they always take it to the extreme.

So what I said about my therapist was my opinions about my therapist not the hold community.

Note to The Wiz: I'm not sure your appraisal of reasons why not to take this woman seriously follow, but, when it comes to therapists, it's important to know that there are those who think we all need to be cured of our kinks (I've encountered them), and those who can accept us as we are and let us be the judge of what our therapy goals are and of what aspects of our lives we consider to be okay as they are. There is now a set of listings for "kink-aware professionals," including therapists, and also including physicians who won't freak out at the sight of marks from a patient's having been whipped or spanked. Here's the link, http://www.ncsfreedom.org/kap/ , and if by chance you're in New York City I'll be glad to give you a referral to my most recent therapist--I've only stopped going to her because I'm moving--who is open-minded about these things. It's not that she has a special background in kinks; she's simply respectful of them as she's told about them.


And to everybody, for that matter: The link might interest you. http://www.ncsfreedom.org/kap/