Hey, hip-hoppers: pull ya pants up! And what's with the bling around your neck, but but can't pay ya credit card bills? Holla!
Please, big women - I know all about the phrase "if you got it, flaunt it." There's another one about "too much of a good thing". Tight pants? No. Shirts that cover almost all of your stomach, but not all? No. True, men DO like curves on women. Like.... well toned abs.
NO sandals if you have bad feet! This shouldn't even have to be on the list.
And while were on the subject, chickas, don't go out wearing the barest sandals... put on bright red nail polish with a flower on the big toe that you PAID someone to do for you... add a toe ring or two.... a gold anklet... a tiny butterfly tattoo.... body glitter.... a swish of mehndi... and then act like we're freak pervs when we notice.
WWJD? Not wear logos, that's what.
You got "Thug" tattooed across your chest, but I'm not allowed to 'label' you? Two words for ya; the first one starts with a great big "F....."
Gamers, come on with the kilts, now, enough. Society of Creative Anachronism? Deal. A "utili-kilt"' in the mall? No deal.
And what about the McNugget? Who are the geniuses that came up with this? I wanna know!
Indian and Filipino women - quit bleaching your skin, you look fine. And for those of us who are in the Klan, it's not like you're fooling us.
Oh, you got a tattoo of some Chinese characters, too? Nice. It shows your individuality. What - they run out of the Hebrew or Cuneiform stencils that day? What's it mean, "thug" maybe? Don't forget to get that big longhorn/tree branch thingy across your lower back, I'd hate to break up a set.
A Betty Boop shirt? AWE-some! Nothing says youthful cuteness like the B&W silent era. You sure don't look 96!