sexual disorientation

[some1somewhere]

Have you every been confused with the opposite orientation? This is not a thread to offend anyone. But I am straight, and I am getting tired of being accused of bring gay. I know I am not the most MACHO person in the world. But I do know that I am attracted to women. I know that it is women's feet nor male feet that I find attractive. I find the ticklish laugher of a lady very arousing, not a males. But I am a very shy person in general. I tend to keep quiet of my fetish, but not my orientation. Today I had someone who was very forward in accusing me of being gay when I am not. This person was a person of the opposite sex and gay. She was "Since I am gay I know who is, and you are whether you know it or not." I think she is a sweet person, nor do I want to "reveal her to recrimination". The thing that bothers me is that I was embarrassed as to the direction of the conversation, and as someone who is very private as to my own sexuality I had to balance two ways. It ended with me a little frustrated, and embarrassed. I guess the question is if how do you deal with it. What makes a man gay? The reason I am asking it rather than ignoring it (as I normally would) is that I am getting a little pissed at getting this same damn question every few weeks or so. I could go one to say I am attracted to this or that, but the real question is what attracts me to another. Maybe I am too picky, but this is what immediately comes to mind as attractive. This is vague and if you have a better story to tell, please do.

 

[amk714]

Be honest about who you are. If someone says or thinks you're gay correct him or her and tell that person you're straight. Whether you're believed or not is their problem, not yours, unless they decide to spread lies or rumors about you. You're right that it's nobody's business what your sexual orientation is, and as long as you're straightforward about it no one can accuse you of hiding anything and be believed because they have no evidence which proves otherwise. Just be yourself, no one can take that away from you, and don't let anyone get to you about your sexuality. It's not worth getting worked up over.

 

[Krokus]

Well, I say:


Who cares what anyone thinks you are? You know what and who you are and thats all that matters. What makes a man gay? Well, if you like to have sex with men, your gay or at least bisexual. If not, don't worry about it. You don't have to prove anything to anyone in this life. The only person you have to prove anything to is yourself.

 

[Knox The Hatter]

Sounds like the person accusing you feels strength and comfort in numbers...and feels very lonely having come out without other people having done so.

I wouldn't worry about this.

 

[some1somewhere]

Good grief, that is the last time I try to type something on this board after drinking two bottles of wine. I'm not even sure I can really understand what I wrote. I think that the thing that bothered me most about this issue is that I get that question enough that it is becoming annoying. I don't think it was lady in general that bothered me, but I an just wondering what is it about the way I present myself, ie mannerisms, that contributes to this misinterptation of who I am. One person said it was that I am very phonitic in how I speak? Anyway, since this is an issue that only people who know me personally could possibly answer I guess I really shouldn't have posted it here to begin with, but I did need to vent.

Does anyone else, however, have this problem as well?

 

[tickledorange]

I still remember when this kid in my high scholl accused everyone of being gay. He kept saying things to people like "Why do you have to be such a fag?" and stupid stuff like that. Well, a few years later, after it had ended and everything, a few of us had learned that he had a boyfriend that he was living with while at college. Sooo, if someone says something like that, I just say "Whatever." and blow them off, cause you never know what they're really trying to say.

 

[Butterfly wings]

Well, I say:


Who cares what anyone thinks you are? You know what and who you are and thats all that matters. What makes a man gay? Well, if you like to have sex with men, your gay or at least bisexual. If not, don't worry about it. You don't have to prove anything to anyone in this life. The only person you have to prove anything to is yourself.

Amen very well said Krokus. *standing appleause*

 

[Butterfly wings]

I still remember when this kid in my high scholl accused everyone of being gay. He kept saying things to people like "Why do you have to be such a fag?" and stupid stuff like that. Well, a few years later, after it had ended and everything, a few of us had learned that he had a boyfriend that he was living with while at college. Sooo, if someone says something like that, I just say "Whatever." and blow them off, cause you never know what they're really trying to say.

Now that you mention it tickledorange. Come to think of it. My own co-worker who i work with uses the fag or homo word around me and towards me some times while i am working with him with the job that we do. Since we work side by side

But my last day is Nov. 2. So i don't have to hear it anymore. Since me and him are both done with our Job on the 2nd of Nov anyways. I'm straight as an arrow. But i still don't like the fag tone and fag or homo word period that he uses no matter if he is using it in a joking manner or not when he talks.

 

[Ignatz]

"To be great is to be misunderstood."
--Ralph Waldo Emerson