Mastertank1
2nd Level Yellow Feather
- Joined
- Jan 21, 2006
- Messages
- 3,375
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The elderly Italian gentleman had been running his streetcorner vegetable stand for decades.
One evening an equally elderly lady approaches and gives him a list, one item at a time. He assembles each item and weighs it and bags it. The last item, an afterthought, she asks for a pound of onions.
He tells her he's all out of oinions.
Then, she says, "give me 3/4 of a pound of onions."
"But I have no oinions."
"So let me have a half pound of onions."
Growing exasperated he shouts that he is all out of onions.
In a wheedling tone she begs "so a quarter pound of onions?"
Visibly bridling his temper, he says "let me spell it out for you!"
Grabbing a paper bag and a pen he writes and hands it to the old lady. She reads; "I h-a-v-e n-o o-n-f-u-c-k-i-o-n-s !"
Indignant, she says:"What's this? There ain't no f-u-c-k in onions!"
The reply; "Atsa what I been tryin to tell you! There ain't no FUCKIN ONIONS!"
(Rimshot please.)
One evening an equally elderly lady approaches and gives him a list, one item at a time. He assembles each item and weighs it and bags it. The last item, an afterthought, she asks for a pound of onions.
He tells her he's all out of oinions.
Then, she says, "give me 3/4 of a pound of onions."
"But I have no oinions."
"So let me have a half pound of onions."
Growing exasperated he shouts that he is all out of onions.
In a wheedling tone she begs "so a quarter pound of onions?"
Visibly bridling his temper, he says "let me spell it out for you!"
Grabbing a paper bag and a pen he writes and hands it to the old lady. She reads; "I h-a-v-e n-o o-n-f-u-c-k-i-o-n-s !"
Indignant, she says:"What's this? There ain't no f-u-c-k in onions!"
The reply; "Atsa what I been tryin to tell you! There ain't no FUCKIN ONIONS!"
(Rimshot please.)
