Texanology

[FlockOfSeagulls]

1} Armadillos sleep in the middle of the road on there back with all four feet in the air

2} 5,000 types of snakes & 4998 live in Texas

3} 10,000 types of spiders; all 10,000 live in Texas , plus a few no one have ever seen

4} If it grows, it will stick you; It it crawls, it will bite you

5} Nothing can kill a Mesquite tree

6} A tractor is NOT an all-terrain vehicle; they do get stuck

7} Onced & twiced are words

8} Coldbeer is ONE word

9} Green grass does burn

10} When a buzzard sits on your fence and stares at you, it is time to see your doctor

11} You install security lights on your house & garage, but you leave both unlocked at night

12} You know what '' cowtippin`'' & '' snipehuntin` '' are

13} You only have 4 spices in your kitchen. They are salt, pepper, ketchup, & Tabasco

14} The first day of deer season is a state holiday in Texas

15} A carbonated soft drink isn`t a soda, cola, or pop. It`s a Coke { no matter the brand or flavor}

 

[milagros317]

Very amusing list. 😀

PS: I have no idea what snipehuntin' is.

 

[sole seeker]

Damn fine list.

Snipe hunting is when you take a naive person out in the woods and make them bang on pots and pans yelling "here snipe." If they're exceptionally dense you tell them this will attract the snipe. If they're only average dense, you tell them this will drive the snipe over to the rest of the hunting party. Then you and the rest of the "hunting party" split for a few hours.

Heres the visual picture:

a naive tenderfoot
sitting alone in a forest
banging on a cooking pot with a large spoon
yelling, "Here snipe - here snipe!"

You and the rest of the guys are off for a few cold ones while you discuss just how stupid the snipe hunter is, and how you can turn this to your monetary advantage.