The Asshole Thread

[ViperGTS]

This is the place to post your true experiences with the less intelligent of today's society. Post about morons, assholes, dipsticks, and just stupid people in general. True stories only please!

I recieved this email from an anonymous remailer over the weekend. The jealous moron on the other end is too scared to use his real email address or tell me his real name, for the past 7 months or so.

---
From: Anonymous Sender <[email protected]>
To: My Email address
Subject: Hey Shithead..
Date: Sun, 20 Nov 2005 00:30:22 +0000


I find it ironic a military drop out thinks he's so tough that he believes a murderer should be turned over to him for vigililante justice. LOL I'm sure that
would scare the guy. I've seen you, you'd get your ass beat.

Also, no one is jealous of you and Irishgirl. It was merely pointed out she's
overweight, and needs to exercise more. She has cellulite for christ sake! We
all know she was never a cheerleader so kindly stop pumping yourself up. You're an idiot, a military drop out, and a flunky. Did the war scare you off?

BY the way, yes it is sexual harrassment, I'd fire your ass and if I ever caught
you even thinking of poking at a woman I'd beat you silly.
---

I don't think this guy is ever going to get the idea. He's going to keep sending these emails, telling me how tough he is (yet never being man enough to face up to his threats or even use a real email addres...pussy), and making me smile, not realizing that everyone but him that browses this forum is laughing at him with me.

Anyone else have any funny stories about morons?

 

[leafstk]

After reading that, the title of this thread is quite appropriate

True asshole story? Hmmm. My sister's ex and the father of her child comes to mind

 

[amk714]

There are a lot of asshole drivers. 🙁

 

[Wildtime]

I'm a perfect driver, it's the rest of the world that can't drive...

😱 Compared to your 'anonymous sender' chucklehead, my assholes are merely irritants. But I'll give this one a shot:

My rectum of the week goes to "Calgary drivers". The rest of the country may complain about Montreal drivers, but at least they signal. Alberta drivers, or more specifically Calgary drivers, don't signal, merge with no regard to the surrounding traffic and exhibit various degrees of road rage for no apparent reason.

A years ago, back when I was in the army, driving a Cougar (pre-cursor to the LAV 25) down Deerfoot, and I was cut-off FIVE times...in a 12-ton armoured vehicle...with a 76mm cannon.

Nowadays, with all the major road construction happening in the city, a single stalled vehicle creates massive gridlock which takes forever to clear up. Mix that up with impatient and unskilled drivers, and you eventually wind up with a multi-car pileup. I am ashamed of my fellow Calgarian's driving habits.

 

[elfriend]

oh I have one sorry Tidas but this is a pretty good asshole story and I know you hate it when I bring it up.

My ex fiance and I got engaged it was long distance because I was in college and he was still in high school (in his senior year). So we were engaged for 2 months. He calls me and tells me he doesn't want to be together anymore and is seeing some girl at work whom he has been talking to for a couple of months. Talk about an asshole!

But now I have Tidas so it worked out 🙂

 

[sadira]

I've got one.....(actually, I could come with a list longer than my forearm but I'll share one in particular). This would've been about 3 yrs ago, just before my divorce. I was working 36 hrs a wk (night shift) at a local hospital and another 8 hrs a wk at a dr office at the time. My now ex-husband was working approx 20 hrs a wk at a business right next door to the house we were renting. He had the gall to complain to his co-workers that his house wasn't ever clean and that he was living in a "pig sty"! And THIS makes me the moron?!?!

 

[Mitchell]

OMG This is a perfect thread for me.

Okay, so there is this guy I know, who helps me transport items for my business, that I absolutely cant stand! First, in recent months, the scumbag makes fun of me for being 35 and not married. Then, there was this girl I liked, and instead of wishing me well with her, he brazenly told me she had probably dumped me, and was cheating with someone else, which absolutely wasnt the case. Plus, in addition to being a complete jerk, he is also a moron. If we tell this guy a time to meet us for work, he can never remember the time. I refer to him as a moron, a putz, an asshole, and every name under the sun. I always have my favorite saying about if there was a dictionary definition of someone being something, their picture would be next to it. Well, if there was a dictionary definition of the word Moron, this guy would have his picture next to it!

Okay, end of rant! Perfect thread for me, to go off about this guy. GRRR! I cant stand him!

Mitch

 

[amk714]

Mitch, are you talking about the racist? If you are, I agree: he's a MAJOR asshole!

 

[Ray<3tiklishft]

Perfect place for this:

I was driving my kids (at the time, 11 and 6 years old) to get an ice cream. I was in the left lane of a three lane street when a guy and his girlfriend in an SUV pull out in front of me from a side street, all the way across to get in the left turn lane. There was no room behind the other cars in the left turn lane so he ends up in my lane blocking traffic. I slammed on my brakes and came skidding to a stop, beeping the horn and tires screeching. When he finally moved into the left turn lane, I pulled forwad and looked at him and he gave ME the finger, as if I did something to him.

I had an aluminum baseball bat in my truck, grabbed it, got out, walked toward the SUV, saw the SCARED look on both their faces, and busted the passenger door window where his girlfriend was sitting. I yelled "Hey ASSHOLE! What the fuck is wrong with you. I got my kids in my truck." He took of fast, and made his left turn to who knows where. I got back in my truck and left the scene. Surprisingly, I never got a notice from the police or anything. I guess people saw what happened and figured the ASSHOLE got what he deserved.

Then my kids and I enjoyed our Sunday sundaes. (True story)

 

[Mitchell]

Yes, Amk, Iam talking about the racist. The very same guy who made the assanine and predjudice comments about racial intermarriage. Amk, I agree with you, he is one of the biggest assholes I've ever met, and a stupid moron to boot.

Mitch

 

[Mitchell]

I have another asshole to post about, and while there isnt any specific incident about her, it is just her behavior in general that puts her on my list.
My best friend's mom is one of the most miserable human beings I have ever met in my life. She is nasty, condescending, judgemental, and thinks she has a right to pass judgement, and opinion, on how anyone lives their lives, even if the person does not affect her in any way. In circumstances where there are times parents should just keep their mouths shut, her attitude is that "She has a right to pass opinion, but her children dont have to go by it".
I havent seen this woman for 7 years, after she passed comment that I was "using" my best friend, because he was helping me get settled with my move down here from NJ in 1999. She was extremely gleeful when my parents seperated, and Alan and I estranged, saying to my friend that "It happens to a lot of people" Well, lady, what goes around, comes around, because she is currently getting seperated and divorced after 41 years of marriage, because her husband cant stand her badgering and judgemental mouth, and that she is a cold blooded nasty bitch. I feel bad for my best friend that his parents are divorcing, but he is well aware of my feelings for her, and says he can understand, and would feel the same way if my parents had done this to him. Conversely, while I dont see his mother, my mom and my best friend have a great relationship, and she sees him all the time, and considers him like a second child.
I think the bottom line with my best friend's mom is that she hates me because I dont put up with control freaks. She despises me because Iam estranged from my father, and while she doesnt know about the last round with him, because I wasnt talking to her then, and asked my friend to keep my business a secret from his parents, she felt I had no reason to estrange from him, because her husband saw his father, who physically abused him, to the very end. If my friend's father felt he didnt want to estrange from his dad, fine, that is his peroggative, but to me, be damned to anyone and this woman who judges me for not seeing Alan, because they arent standing in my shoes. I wouldnt have any right to judge how another person treats their family, since Iam not in their shoes. I think another problem with this woman, is that during the years we all knew each other in Connecticut, my father made a lot more money then her husband, my parents had class, and they never did, so when the divorce happened, and my mom and I got hit financially, this bitch loved it. She wont come out as badly in her divorce as we did, but still, to me, it is poetic justice. If there was a dictionary definition of the words "Bad Person", her picture could be next to it.
So, Iam done, end of rant.

Mitch

 

[blondie46]

Nice thread, Viper. A couple of days ago there was a gas leak in town, so an area was evacuated. My son invited four/five evacuees over, and man were they LOUD....playing some computer device and actually SWEARING when they missed shooting at obstacles or whatever they were attempting. And there was a LITTLE one with em, dressed in one of those old man long coats, and HE was loud too, like a little understudy!!! And there are always people in this house, guests, shouters, and wayfarers...forcing ME to be a bitter faced AH. LOL.....but my theory is, is that I'd rather have all the boys home and I know where they are, instead of out doing God only knows what, so I tone down the AH-ism a little. I just think guests should have some respect, especially since I'm the lone lady around here. hehehehe. That felt good to rant.

 

[amk714]

Perfect place for this:

I was driving my kids (at the time, 11 and 6 years old) to get an ice cream. I was in the left lane of a three lane street when a guy and his girlfriend in an SUV pull out in front of me from a side street, all the way across to get in the left turn lane. There was no room behind the other cars in the left turn lane so he ends up in my lane blocking traffic. I slammed on my brakes and came skidding to a stop, beeping the horn and tires screeching. When he finally moved into the left turn lane, I pulled forwad and looked at him and he gave ME the finger, as if I did something to him.

I had an aluminum baseball bat in my truck, grabbed it, got out, walked toward the SUV, saw the SCARED look on both their faces, and busted the passenger door window where his girlfriend was sitting. I yelled "Hey ASSHOLE! What the fuck is wrong with you. I got my kids in my truck." He took of fast, and made his left turn to who knows where. I got back in my truck and left the scene. Surprisingly, I never got a notice from the police or anything. I guess people saw what happened and figured the ASSHOLE got what he deserved.

Then my kids and I enjoyed our Sunday sundaes. (True story)

Usually, I don't condone road rage, but in this case, I do (it's not like you used a gun). I think he was too scared to have you brought up on charges, and knew he was wrong to do what he did. What an asshole! 😡

 

[Ray<3tiklishft]

Usually, I don't condone road rage, but in this case, I do (it's not like you used a gun). I think he was too scared to have you brought up on charges, and knew he was wrong to do what he did. What an asshole! 😡

The only real reason I was mad is because my kids were in the truck, otherwise I might not have been as mad. But still, I kinda wish I didn't act that way in front of my kids. But they know that I wouldn't let anything happen to them, even to the point of road rage, which I don't condone either. But no way was the A-hole going to offend me TWICE without a reply.

If anybody is offended by my actions, I apologize. But some people are stupid and need to be taught a lesson that they soon won't forget.

 

[tulipangel]

I got one.......

The @$$hole that I have to write about here is an ex of mine who wound up not only cheating with women but also men! AND I caught him in OUR bed! Forking @$$hole!

 

[Mitchell]

My father acted like a complete asshole on Monday when he went off on me, and threatened me, for asking quietly about the status of my mom's alimony. Basically, he is just an asshole in general, as well as a few other things I can think of!


Mitch

 

[Mitchell]

My father acted like a complete asshole again today, merely because I questioned him about when he might want to see me. He hasnt seen me since Nov, 2003, and we have been back together now nearly four months. When I gently asked him when we might get together, he sassily said to me:" I dont know", and got all huffy. The guy is just a major league asshole, and will always be, no matter how hard I try to be nice to him.

Mitch

 

[TKpervert]

Sorry to hear that Mitchell. Any idea why he acts like this ?
Emotions are impossible to figure out because there is no logic to them.

 

[Mitchell]

I have no clue, pervert. I wish I knew. He has a lot of unresolved emotional issues, I think, from his early life, that he hasnt dealt with.

Mitch

 

[Kira]

My in-laws come to mind. My father-in-law and mother-in-law criticize my husband and I, and feel they have a right to give their opinion on the way we live our lives. They're assholes, and I wish they would bugger off.

Also, my brother-in-law thinks he's better than everyone else, especially my husband and I.

Yeah, and these are people that I want to bring around my son - RIGHT!!!!!