Biggles of 266
1st Level Red Feather
- Joined
- Apr 26, 2001
- Messages
- 1,128
- Points
- 36
I have no idea where this comes from, someone just emailed it to me. It could be the onion ( www.theonion.com ) or it could just be someone with a lot of time on their hands (again, www.theonion.com ). Enjoy and don't take it too seriously...
The Axis of Just as Evil
"In Speech, Bush Calls Iraq, Iran and North Korea 'Axis of
Evil" - N.Y.Times, 1/30/02
ANGERED BY SNUBBING, LIBYA, CHINA AND SYRIA FORM "AXIS OF
JUST AS EVIL"
Cuba, Sudan, Serbia form Axis of Somewhat Evil. Other
nations start thier own clubs bitter after being snubbed for
membership in the "Axis of Evil"
Libya, China, and Syria today announced they had formed the
"Axis of Just as Evil," which they said would be way eviler than
that stupid Iran-Iraq-North Korea axis President Bush warned of
his State of the Union address. Axis of Evil members, however,
immediately dismissed the new axis as having, for starters, a
really dumb name. "Right. They are Just as Evil... in their
dreams!" declared North Korean leader Kim Jong-il. "Everybody
knows we're the best evils... best at being evil... we're the
best. "Diplomats from Syria denied they were jealous over being
excluded, although they conceded they did ask if they could join
the Axis of Evil. "They told us it was full," said Syrian
President Bashar al-Assad."An Axis can't have more than three
countries," explained Iraqi President Saddam Hussein. "This is
not my rule, it's tradition. In World War II you had Germany,
Italy, and Japan in the evil Axis. So you can only have three.
And a secret handshake. Ours is wicked cool."
International reaction to Bush's Axis of Evil declaration
was swift, as within minutes, France surrendered. Elsewhere,
peer-conscious nations rushed to gain triumvirate status in what
became a game of geopolitical chairs. Cuba, Sudan, and Serbia
said they had formed the Axis of Somewhat Evil, forcing Somalia
to join with Uganda and Myanmar in the Axis of Occasionally
Evil, while Bulgaria, Indonesia and Russia established the Axis
of Not So Much Evil Really As Just Generally Disagreeable. With
the criteria suddenly expanded and all the desirable clubs
filling up, Sierra Leone, El Salvador, and Rwanda applied to be
called the Axis of Countries That Aren't the Worst But Certainly
Won't Be Asked to Host The Olympics; Canada, Mexico, and
Australia formed the Axis of Nations That Are Actually Quite
Nice But Secretly Have Nasty Thoughts About America, while
Spain, Scotland, and New Zealand established the Axis of
Countries That Be Allowed to Ask Sheep to Wear Lipstick. "That's
not a threat, really, just something we like to do," said
Scottish Executive First Minister Jack McConnell.
While wondering if the other nations of the world weren't
perhaps making fun of him, a cautious Bush granted approval for
most axes, although he rejected the establishment of the Axis of
Countries Whose Names End in "Guay," accusing one of its members
of filing a false application. Officials from Paraguay, Uruguay,
and Chadguay denied the charges. Israel, meanwhile, insisted it
didn't want to join any Axis, but privately, world leaders said
that's only because no one asked them.
The Axis of Just as Evil
"In Speech, Bush Calls Iraq, Iran and North Korea 'Axis of
Evil" - N.Y.Times, 1/30/02
ANGERED BY SNUBBING, LIBYA, CHINA AND SYRIA FORM "AXIS OF
JUST AS EVIL"
Cuba, Sudan, Serbia form Axis of Somewhat Evil. Other
nations start thier own clubs bitter after being snubbed for
membership in the "Axis of Evil"
Libya, China, and Syria today announced they had formed the
"Axis of Just as Evil," which they said would be way eviler than
that stupid Iran-Iraq-North Korea axis President Bush warned of
his State of the Union address. Axis of Evil members, however,
immediately dismissed the new axis as having, for starters, a
really dumb name. "Right. They are Just as Evil... in their
dreams!" declared North Korean leader Kim Jong-il. "Everybody
knows we're the best evils... best at being evil... we're the
best. "Diplomats from Syria denied they were jealous over being
excluded, although they conceded they did ask if they could join
the Axis of Evil. "They told us it was full," said Syrian
President Bashar al-Assad."An Axis can't have more than three
countries," explained Iraqi President Saddam Hussein. "This is
not my rule, it's tradition. In World War II you had Germany,
Italy, and Japan in the evil Axis. So you can only have three.
And a secret handshake. Ours is wicked cool."
International reaction to Bush's Axis of Evil declaration
was swift, as within minutes, France surrendered. Elsewhere,
peer-conscious nations rushed to gain triumvirate status in what
became a game of geopolitical chairs. Cuba, Sudan, and Serbia
said they had formed the Axis of Somewhat Evil, forcing Somalia
to join with Uganda and Myanmar in the Axis of Occasionally
Evil, while Bulgaria, Indonesia and Russia established the Axis
of Not So Much Evil Really As Just Generally Disagreeable. With
the criteria suddenly expanded and all the desirable clubs
filling up, Sierra Leone, El Salvador, and Rwanda applied to be
called the Axis of Countries That Aren't the Worst But Certainly
Won't Be Asked to Host The Olympics; Canada, Mexico, and
Australia formed the Axis of Nations That Are Actually Quite
Nice But Secretly Have Nasty Thoughts About America, while
Spain, Scotland, and New Zealand established the Axis of
Countries That Be Allowed to Ask Sheep to Wear Lipstick. "That's
not a threat, really, just something we like to do," said
Scottish Executive First Minister Jack McConnell.
While wondering if the other nations of the world weren't
perhaps making fun of him, a cautious Bush granted approval for
most axes, although he rejected the establishment of the Axis of
Countries Whose Names End in "Guay," accusing one of its members
of filing a false application. Officials from Paraguay, Uruguay,
and Chadguay denied the charges. Israel, meanwhile, insisted it
didn't want to join any Axis, but privately, world leaders said
that's only because no one asked them.
