Therapists Dating Former Patients: Is It Possible?

[Ocean]

I'm only interested in facts and legal information here -- not opinions on ethics or morality. My question is, is it ever possible for a therapist to date a former a patient -- therapy has ended etc. I've heard that after a certain amount of time has passed (6 months or something) it is legal, but I'm unsure of the legitimacy of such statements.

Does anyone know?

 

[Skipadeedoodah]

I have no idea what the laws are, but I'm sure they vary from state to state.

I know you don't want to hear about ethics - but I'm not talking about ethics like, some mouthpiece thinks it's "unethical" so they piss and moan about it. Therapists and other people who work in human services do so based on a strict code of ethics that are not "laws", but are adhered to by people in that particular profession as laws - if that makes any sense at all. So even thought state or federal law might allow it, the APA and the NASW do not. Even if they might not have to serve jail time, if they get caught they could still lose their license.

 

[Ocean]

if they get caught they could still lose their license.

So once a therapist sees a patient once, they could never have a relationship for the rest of their lives? There is no passage of time that would ever enable it to be okay?

 

[Skipadeedoodah]

So once a therapist sees a patient once, they could never have a relationship for the rest of their lives? There is no passage of time that would ever enable it to be okay?

You would have to look it up on APA or NASW website to be 100% certain of the exact way the ethical guidelines are laid out, but I'm reasonably sure that after you see someone in a professional context you can't/shouldn't see them in any other context after that. I mean, people definitely do it and don't get caught, but usually the relationship contains its own consequences and doesn't last anyway.

 

[Ocean]

You would have to look it up on APA or NASW website to be 100% certain of the exact way the ethical guidelines are laid out, but I'm reasonably sure that after you see someone in a professional context you can't/shouldn't see them in any other context after that. I mean, people definitely do it and don't get caught, but usually the relationship contains its own consequences and doesn't last anyway.

If that's true, that's... Really sad.

 

[Skipadeedoodah]

If that's true, that's... Really sad.

Why do you say that?

 

[LD_Tickler]

I think Skipperoo is mostly right on this one. It would certainly be about the regulatory board revoking licenses, not law.

If it's allowed, it wouldn't be based on how much time has passed - "former patient" is "former patient," whether it's 6 weeks or 6 years, I'd guess.

 

[Ocean]

Why do you say that?

For a number of reasons -- people change, for instance. They won't always be in that vulnerable position that is primarily what makes those types of relationships frowned upon.

Also, soul mates are found in strange ways; it's beyond sad if someone were to find theirs in a patient or therapist, and could never be together because at some point, some other person felt that it wasn't okay.

If you found the one that was really meant for you though, I don't think losing the license would matter.

 

[rhiannon]

For a number of reasons -- people change, for instance. They won't always be in that vulnerable position that is primarily what makes those types of relationships frowned upon.

But how do you find out if the person really has changed? A therapist will always know how his/her patient "ticks" and could easily manipulate them.

 

[Skipadeedoodah]

For a number of reasons -- people change, for instance. They won't always be in that vulnerable position that is primarily what makes those types of relationships frowned upon.

Also, soul mates are found in strange ways; it's beyond sad if someone were to find theirs in a patient or therapist, and could never be together because at some point, some other person felt that it wasn't okay.

If you found the one that was really meant for you though, I don't think losing the license would matter.

The problem is that the people who would be able to have a healthy relationship with someone they had once had a therapeutic relationship with are few and far between - if they exist at all. More often than not you end up with a very unhealthy relationship in which the roles are not clearly defined. Not to mention once a therapist opens that door and lets himself/herself believe that there's a chance that down the road, months or even years away, they may develop a relationship with this person, it would open them up for all kinds of transference and really diminish their ability to help the client. It's just a very irresponsible path to take.

 

[LD_Tickler]

But how do you find out if the person really has changed? A therapist will always know how his/her patient "ticks" and could easily manipulate them.

That's just as possible in any other relationship.

 

[rhiannon]

That's just as possible in any other relationship.

Of course, but in another relationship there isn't one partner trained in that kind of way. A friend of mine is psychologist, and she has a really hard time to turn the psychologist off while she is with her friends and partner.