Tickling Everyday & The Quality of Life

[Amnesiac]

Now it's true that daily tickling is not necessary for survival...consider how many people go years without it who don't die of cancer. But it's probably undeniable that for ticklephiles, tickling on a regular basis has beneficial physical and emotional effects, even its only palliative. It's even safe to say that even when ticklephiles DON'T have it every day, we're at least THINKING about (sometime even intentionally). After that, its a toss-up as to how much we actually get of what we want: some get it every day and some get it once a year if that.

So I figured, why not as the members of those two disparate groups how the frequency of tickling effects their daily lives mentally and physically. So...lees and lers:

For those of you who get tickling often, how often do you get it and how has your life felt once you got that much?

For those of you who barely get ANY tickling, how often do you get it, and how does that lack of it affect your daily life once it started?

I'd especially like to hear from those who manage to get it every day because those results would be interesting...and provoke envy, but that's neither here nor there.

SUBQUESTION: What would you do and how do you think you would feel if your current supply situation were reversed?

 

[RavenMoon]

Interesting and provoking question... And I agree. Laughter alone brightens your outlook and relieves stress, which allows your body and mind to better fight illness. By relieving the body and mind of unnecessary stress, the two portions are now able to devote energy to better things, which in turns gives you more everyday energy.

I live with my Love, my fiancee, who introduced tickling into my BDSM vocabulary. He is the one who is the sensual ticklephile Dom. I am the sadomasochistic pure switch. Introducing tickling into my life has made me better appreciate a softer hand in my scenes. It also has allowed me to be the goofy person I can. So often we get into tickle fights and doing just goofy things. There is no stress to be anything I am not and same for him. We just exist with each other.

I think life for us is much better now than it was before. But for us, there are a number of factors besides just the tickling that play into that. There is the finding someone who totally understands where you are coming from. Someone who you can share details of your kinks with without the hazard of them thinking your sick or crazy. There is the freedom to explore with someone you trust. Oh... and there is that little thing called love that might have something to do with it too. That acceptance is the greatest. These things all play a part in enriching the quality of life.

 

[911]

I don't get any ever and it causes stress, depression, and feeling of isolation.
I feel there's something wrong with me.

 

[Cavum]

For those of you who get tickling often, how often do you get it and how has your life felt once you got that much?


I'd especially like to hear from those who manage to get it every day because those results would be interesting...and provoke envy, but that's neither here nor there.

SUBQUESTION: What would you do and how do you think you would feel if your current supply situation were reversed?

Interesting thread. I have the possibility to play with tickling pretty much every day with several girls. And even that tickling is something I think of all the time and means alot in my life, it don't give me the same things as it used to do before. I remeber when I was hidden with my fetish, then all tickle experiences was something that gave me a REALLY good memorie and feeling. These days that only happends with a few people. I guess I demands more now since I have the possibility to tickle whenever I want.

And if the situation were reversed? Well I been there, so I know that every possibility to tickle would be a big and great moment for me. Even if this sounds stupid (at least for you who don't get it much) I kind of miss the feelings I used to get when I didn't get to tickle so much. When you experience your fantasies on a daily basis, it will loose some of it's effect on your mind and body.

 

[Skipadeedoodah]

I get my share of tickling and then some, and my first thought is that it doesn't change my quality of life at all, but after thinking about it, it is a huge stress relief.

It's one of those things that you don't really notice you're missing until you get it - if that makes sense. If I go a few days without being tickled, and then I get it really good, I get this amazing rush of euphoria and relaxation that improves my mood for the entire day.

Actually - I'm gonna go see what Michael's doing

 

[xSamanthax]

Tickling in our house tends to run in spurts. Everyday for a while, then not much for while. So I guess I get both ends of the spectrum, lol. Thing is, it's on tap anytime, so I am content with the situation.

As for what it has brought to my life...a lot of playfulness, which I need. I tend to be a very serious person and often need to lighten up, lol.

 

[sasaxrah]

I play pretty much every time I see my boyfriend, which is usually two times a week. Not only is it a huge stress relief, it's also something we both love to do. It's hard for me to separate tickling from meeting my boyfriend, since the two happened at the same time. Since then, I've been pretty happy and satisfied with life. That's not to say I was unsatisfied before, but something was definitely missing. Since all this started, I've been happier at work. I've been feeling good about stuff, which always encourages me to eat better and exercise more.

It would really, really, really suck if I didn't have access to tickling on a regular basis. I'd be trying to fix it immediately.

 

[BellaRisa]

I haven't gone more than a few days without at least a brief bit of tickling in the last 17 yrs. My life partners aren't tk-philes but they're both very physically affectionate and tactile, and neither can walk by me very often without a gentle poke or ticklish caress; it's just habit now. It's definitely enhanced my life because I'm such a touch-junkie, I need daily hugs and kisses and tickles and such the way I need food and water, and I'm grateful I have loved ones who recognize that and give me what I need 🙂 I can't imagine life if that were reversed, frankly they'd have to have entirely different personalities and we probably would never have become 'us' 🙁

 

[Ayla ny]

You know… you really would think that two people, who are really into tickling, who starting talking because of TMF and met for the first time at NEST, would tickle for hours and hours and hours… every single day.

You would think.

What we DO do is tease each other A LOT! Lots of dangling shoes (me) and “Gonna getcha!” looks (him). Lots of reaching waaayyy up high with a short top on (me) and lots of “You’re gonna pay for that” looks (him).

It’s awesome! 😀

We both wish that we were able to push friends, family and obligations into the closet and make those teases/threats pay off a little more often than we get to… but I don’t ever want to give up the teasing. And I’m willing to bet that he feels the same way about the threats.

So, here’s to hoping for just a little bit less friends, family and obligations. 😉

 

[Tiger.Lily]

When I lived with dREW for a year there was tickling every day. Some days more, some days less. But there was always something. It was a reassurance of affection and love. Like Bella, I need some sort of physical affection every day in order to feel happy.

Since dREW has moved out, I get it infrequently (compared to what I used to get). I'd say one or twice every few days to a week I'll get a few pokes or a squeeze. I might get something a little more intense once a week or so.

I miss it a lot. Because tickling is one of the ultimate forms of physical affection to me, I do feel something lacking in my life. I've also noticed it means much less to me when it's a co-worker flirtatiously poking me than when it is dREW or a close friend squeezing and tickling because they know (or notice) that it makes me happy, and because they're showing some form of affection.

Recently, dREW and I had a tickle fight, and even though it was platonic and harmless I felt a huge rush of happiness. I glowed the rest of the day.

So, uh, in short, yes, getting daily doses of tickling (and the love, affection, comfort, and reassurance it provided) did affect the quality of my life for the better, and I do miss it greatly.

 

[His Divine Shadow]

I don't think my situation qualifies as receiving "barely any" tickling. If I'm not at a gathering I get no tickling. Literally none. I think that, outside of the gatherings I've been to, I may have had a total of five minutes of tickling in my entire life. So I am squarely in the no action camp. Having received so little it is difficult to comment well on its absence, for such is a fact of my life.

Having, in the last year, been to several gatherings and received more than my share of tickling I can make a comparison between me receiving and me in the tk drylands. The times I am tickled are immensely relaxing. It is like some sort of ultra-super-Danimal Surprise Massage that kneads the stress from my brain as much as, if not much more than, my muscles. I am a generally stressed-out person, mostly thanks to schoolwork, but also thanks to my personality which doesn't lend itself to relaxation. The few days (and especially hours) after I have been tickled are astonishingly relaxing compared to my normal state. Tickling forces me to relax, as I cannot control my reactions and thus the control freak I am turns off, shocked by this strange phenomena. So maybe that's why I am so stressed normally; not enough tickling. Or maybe I just stress myself out. Or both. Whatever, eh? 😀

Were the situation reversed? I don't know how I'd take it. I cherish the moments I do get tickling now as something rare and precious and I can't easily see how I'd react if it were not such an uncommon thing and occurred, say, weekly or even daily. I think I'd enjoy it no small bit, but I do suspect it wouldn't be too much of a stress reliever if not given by those I care for and know well. The fun of tickling for me comes as much from the relationship I have with my 'ler (or, it seems, my 'lee 😀) as it does from the physical act itself. So if I did receive it more that would mean, hopefully, that I'd be seeing and interacting with those I care about more as well. And that, perhaps, would make my stress melt all the more.

Good question, Amnesiac.

 

[chicago]

I'd like to believe getting tickled often somehow makes me a happier person, but I'm happier at this point in my life for a lot of other reasons too.

At any rate, the one thing I miss when I wasn't getting tickled often, was how surprising and exciting it was when I finally did.

On the up side, the boyfriend and I are looking to invest in some bondage equipment. Finding someone you can really share this kind of thing with is amazing.

 

[Amnesiac]

Okay, looks like its time for me to chime in to keep the thread going...because I KNOW there's more than 9 people who have something to say about this.

I'm in a different section of the same boat HDS booked passage on: I have NO access whatsoever to tickling in my everyday life (or BDSM or sex or pretty much anything else for that matter, lol) so I'm entirely dependent on the TMF and gatherings for anything.

The effect on my life is a bit difficult to describe but AnnieHall has hit on it from a glance: when you don't have it, there is a certain thrill and excitement that comes from alleviating that deprivation. I suppose that it makes my imagination and fantasy life more active, but I find that sometimes spikes and ebbs in that department can be triggered by an unknown combination of food and fatigue and occasionally depression. So it's hard to say if my imagination is due to a dry spell exclusively.

However, there's a certain trepidation that goes with indulgence. Because I'm dependent on gatherings, my sessions are never as casual or as fun as they might be with people who are accustomed to regular tickling; I always have to maintain my professional composure to protect the lee and my reputation. Everybody has to do that, true, but I think that those who get it regularly can have more fun with it and let the chemistry of the session take over, whereas people like me have to have a certain detachment, which can diminish the fun.

I don't know how I would feel if the situation were reversed, because it would probably require the context of a regular partner which would require the context of a relationship and I don't do those; so it'd probably be like trading the discomfort of an empty stomach for the discomfort of a really full stomach.

 

[JustPeechy]

I am tickled almost daily now, by a man who basically rolled his eyes when I first asked him to. The benefits are received by both of us. He cant wait to make me laugh and I seriously need it some days. I wouldn't trade it for the world. If a few days go by and I am untickled, I get needy and start leaving my feet just laying around waiting....

 

[xSamanthax]

I am tickled almost daily now, by a man who basically rolled his eyes when I first asked him to.

Oh mine didn't roll his eyes. I'm not sure if hubby is a true ticklephile or just likes to exploit a weak spot. But after years of not letting him tickle me (I have sort of a love/hate relationship with the whole thing - which it why it tends to run in spurts), I told him that I was considering doing a tickle video. He looked me dead in the eye and said: "You know this changes everything, right?" And from that day forward, I have been defending against tickle attacks, lol.

 

[b0xr]

After reading all the replies I realize how truly lucky I am to be able to tickle almost any day and at time. My wife is not your typical 'lee. She doesn't like the torturous tickling but does enjoy being tickled to a point. Bondage has been out of the equation for a couple of years because of health issues so mostly it's me pinning her and going to town. I am much bigger and stronger so I have little difficulty attaining dominance. She really LOVES having her feet tickled lightly but when it really begins to tickle she wants it to end. Sometimes I will stop and sometimes I will keep tickling...depends on HER mood. She will tease me into tickling her, ask for it so to say and I always oblige her. Last week I pinned her on the couch and started tickling her. I tickled her neck with my lips and her nipples with my free hand. I did this lightly and only a few seconds at a time so she was laughing yet not laughing too hard. It was a good balance that she really seemed to enjoy. It made both of us very excited so we went to bed for some afternoon delight. Did I mention that she LOVES having her feet tickled? She'll lie on the couch and put her foot on my chest and wiggle it meaning take off my socks and tickle...and I oblige. Not too bad for a girl that isn't quite a tru'lee. 😀

 

[ShadowKat]

I don't get any tickle action these days, but I'm cool with it. I have a very active imagination, and am perfectly content to just hang out here on the Forum, and, as finances allow the occasional splurge, support certain favorite vendors on C4S. It's all good.

 

[ticklishfeetnyc]

No doubt tickling regularly helps the quality of life and makes releationships fun. I tickle my wife almost daily and so does she, she just tickled my feet on the couch a few hours ago. Not having to ask to be tickled is great to because it is not all about sex but to make the other feel good or just playful teasing. So I would agree and think this is a very unique thread.

 

[Bohemianne]

There are 2 things about tickling and me:
I can ask for it conveniently OR I can draw it.

 

[P_Bustleton]

I've been tickling and getting tickled a lot more than I have in the past, and my overall happiness has been increasing. Other things have been going well in my life, but having a regular tickle partner (with whom I am in an open relationship) and other friends who are into it has made me feel very comfortable with who I am.

There's no doubt that getting tickled gives me a short-term mood boost. I do find myself "craving" it. I have to agree with skipadeedodah, Sasaxrah, and Bella here. I'm not quite as much of a touch junkie as Bella, but I am "touchy-feely" and having human contact alone is pleasurable.

Great bump, Amnesiac. Looking forward to seeing you at NEST!

 

[dreamer117]

Great question! I'm actually in the middle on this, and a bit confused. 🙂

Went way too many years in the "no action" camp with gf's and then a wife (now ex) who hated tickling. But over those years, for me, it evolved from a minor kink to major. I dreamed about it more and more and wanted it SO bad. Finally got out of the unhappy marriage (for non-TK reasons) and started living out some long-suppressed fantasies.

Right now I have my first ever gf who's actually cool with and even semi-into my tickle fetish. She has an awesome fun/sexy/playful attitude, and lets me tickle her many times a day -- but just playfully or as foreplay. We only use light bondage every few days, and even then rarely get too prolonged or intense. She doesn't like that much and I *don't* want to ruin this.

In the beginning it was absolute heaven! She was extremely ticklish. But recently she seems to be getting less and less ticklish. I vary technique, location, etc., but the effect is clearly diminishing.

So I'm actually wondering now if we've been doing it too much. Or if she was only so ticklish the first few months because she'd barely ever been tickled before. Now that she gets tickled all the time, maybe her body has acclimatized?

Anyway, finally finding the dream -- a wonderful cutie who enjoys some tickling -- is truly incredible. Makes me wish I'd sought it years sooner. (To me tickling was NOT something to risk breaking a marriage over. It just sucked to lose it anyway, and have gone so long before finally pursuing this happiness.) But now that I have it, I'm learning that I still have to learn how to best fully enjoy it! 🙂

 

[juiceboxs]

For those of you who barely get ANY tickling, how often do you get it, and how does that lack of it affect your daily life once it started?

I don't get tickling , i dish it out, and being 52 and still a tickle virgin, i,ll have to rely on other peoples opinions.

 

[Sunriseticklee]

I think about it everyday (on some level) and I get tickled everyday...

Not full blown sessions- sometimes it is just a squeeze or caress before I fall asleep. I'm sure I would be fine without it, and there are days when I just crave it.

As mentioned by others.... I think it is the physical contact/ affection: kissing, hugging, etc. that I love more than anything.

I have been in "no tickle land" before. Sometimes I'm cool, and sometimes it sucks. 🙁
BUT, I'd rather be in "no tickle land" than no food land or no job land, so it evens out. LOL 😛