Tickling + normal people

[Sunday_10pm]

I'm guessing posts along these lines have been made before..

All it is, is that I've noticed that quite often on the internet (youtube, dating sites, myspace etc...), I find girls posting "don't message me asking for pictures of my feet" or "please, anyone who wants to know if I'm ticklish and where, go somewhere else". Even worse is when you see young girls on YouTube who are flattered by the attention and actually respond to these requests, not realising that guys are masturbating to their videos.

My own love-life sucks right now, so I joined a dating site yesterday, and surprisingly I was allowed to actually do a search with keywords - so I looked for "ticklish". Just to see if there were any girls on there open to LIKING it: What I found was a good number who mentioned it (maybe they do like it, maybe it means nothing, maybe they welcome the extra attention!) but a good handful that basically said "tickling pests get lost". Ouch

It looks to me like tickling is actually a common fetish, (I noticed tickling sites are top ranked on clips4sale) and that guys with a tickling or foot fetish are basically a nuissance. There's a huge imbalance of guys/girls on this forum (probably because it revolves around porn, which guys consume more of than girls)

Anyway, there's no conclusion to this. It's just an observation and yeah it's a pretty downbeat post: It's not constructive, but it's honest: what can I say - I feel blue. I'm actually kind of ashamed, and I don't think I deserve to be: I've gone my whole life being careful and considerate (too much for my own good, and probably to compensate for feeling my sexuality is a bit fucked up, and seeing this kind of thing doesn't help)

 

[maniactickler]

I do searches like that as well. when you do see a woman that says shes ticklish, its so tempting to want to make contact, but i usually back off. im sure theres some of those women who mention it because they do like it, but you know theres just as many that dont like it even though they mention it. id rather not come off as creepy. although on occasion i do contact a chosen few. with no response of course.

 

[babinsky]

The inter-net is bursting at the seems with various creeps
and weirdo's, and sorry to say, we're lumped into these categories
by "normal society". Anything out of the ordinary and you're looked at
as a freak. And all the people who use the inter-net to use and abuse
others, have ruined it for everybody.

 

[Sunday_10pm]

After posting this, I felt bad.

So I went out to see if I could find any christmas presents for any of my friends and family and I forgot about myself. On the way home, I remembered, and I decided I'm okay with it. It's all true but it's only one way of looking at it, and it's not the greatest woe I could have.

 

[mabus]

I started a more general discussion of this here

http://www.ticklingforum.com/showthread.php?t=167041

Specifically for you guys...sorry to say, but a lot...maybe not a lot, but enough to be annoying, of foot guys and tickle guys are...annoying!

I notice a lot of guys ask for this stuff on youtube, yet the hand fetish or fart fetish or whatever fetish people don't really. So we get signaled out as the weirdos.
Yet most of us (maybe) don't look at tickling as dirty, so we're kind of stuck.
It hasn't become mainstream, and honestly, EVERY time it's mentioned, it's literally ALWAYS negative.

NO, the guy with the foot fetish hasn't saved a hundred people from a burning building yet. But he keeps breaking into ladies houses to smell their feet!
Which I honestly believe is only about 2 or 3 percent of foot and tickle fetishists.
I wish we could just tell these people, and you guys could tell those girls, "yes, I have a fetish, and I wish for once it wasn't looked on in a negative light. It's harmless and fun, and I'm sorry it has become so damn negative. Why do the big boob lovers get a pass?!"

 

[ViperGTS]

Just remember that as large as your thing for tickling may be, it isn't your defining characteristic. If you make it appear to be your defining characteristic, you're not going to get anywhere with the ladies.

 

[Angel77]

Just remember that as large as your thing for tickling may be, it isn't your defining characteristic. If you make it appear to be your defining characteristic, you're not going to get anywhere with the ladies.

I agree. I'd rather know that a guy was contacting me because he found ME interesting, not the fact that I had a tickling fetish(which I wouldn't divulge until we would be dating for a little bit anyways) esp. if he was contacting me on a vanilla dating site.

 

[QueenMari]

Well,everyone is different.I know I hate being asked those questions.It's absolutely ridiculous when the first words that come out of a guys mouth is asl and then where are you ticklish,where are your worst spots?That's annoying.

 

[DanishTickling]

I don't think there's any reason to be negative about this fetish. it's pretty harmless compared to many other fetishes.
a reason tickling/foot fetish may get a bad reputation is when it's the first thing you ask a woman. most women would find that wierd and repulsive no matter what fetish we are talking about.
I think many guys forget that just because tickling is a rather innocent fetish, it is still inappropriate to ask a woman you haven't talked to before, any tickle or foot related questions..

if we just back off a bit in the beginning and first mention our fetish after we have actually got to know the person, there's a bigger chance it will be accepted.

 

[Sunday_10pm]

Just to clarify, I would never approach a girl in this way, and it's not even a big priority when looking for a partner. I've shared it with all my lovers but I at least wait until we have had sex.

What I don't like is that so many people who don't know how inappropriate it is, are apparently pestering girls (strangers) and giving us, and tickling itself a bad name.

 

[milagros317]

NO, the guy with the foot fetish hasn't saved a hundred people from a burning building yet. But he keeps breaking into ladies houses to smell their feet!
Which I honestly believe is only about 2 or 3 percent of foot and tickle fetishists.

Actually, the person who just saved a hundred people from a burning building may well be a foot fetishist, but that isn't what the reporters will ask him about, nor what the media will report about. It only tends to come up when it's the motive for a creepy crime like stealing women's shoes or tickling the feet of strangers in a library. 🙁

 

[rhiannon]

I don't blame "normal" people that they get annoyed by people with a tickling fetish! I have a tickling fetish myself, and even I get annoyed by the way fellow fetishists approach every now and then!

 

[Sunriseticklee]

Hate to break it to some of you, but a lot of foot guys ARE annoying. It's really annoying to get IMed constantly with a guy not introducing himself, no greeting, just requesting pics of feet... Are you barefoot? How big are your feet? Are your feet ticklish? I'm tickling your feet. GAHHH!

There are tons of ticklish people out there. Some may even admit it, but that doesn't mean they are into it. And those who are into it, may not be open to talking about it.

Then there's us... The ones who love it and who would talk about it if the person approached is politely, and realized (as previously stated) that there are other things to talk about. Be charming. Find me interesting. I'm into so many things, not just tickling.

The good news: It is not impossible to find someone who shares your fetish and enjoys it. I have a great relationship and I do believe it will last. Yes we talk tickling/ tickle just about everyday, but we share so much more than that.

Yes, there are weirdoes out there... Glad it's not any of us! 😀 *giggle

Sunny

 

[gypsyhanna]

I agree, as much as I consider myself a solid ticklephile lol. I have found myself on sites seeing foot lovers and foot tickle lovers making their "requests" (probably applies to other areas too, but so far I've only seen it with the foot people...maybe because they are the most common ones in the tickling community?). I thought "what a weirdo" and that's coming from someone with a tickle fetish...so I can't imagine the creep factor for people who aren't even into it.

I KNOW how desperate the need is to have that desire satisfied, but the volume of weirdos on the net has made it a huge red flag that women now watch for when they are seeking an online partner. The thing is, online we do have to make snap judgements because we don't have the luxury of checking someone out non-verbally first, getting a look at their body language and how they conduct themselves in their lives. Unless ALL you want is someone who is interested in your feet, chances are you are not going to respond to someone who offers only that.

I also think some of the creepy associations are due to the fact that tickling has been used as a "legal" form of child porn. Surely you've all seen it on YouTube, you're looking for actual adult tickle clips and here you end up finding some kid being tickled, with comments below like "that's hot, next time get his feet" or otherwise making custom requests from something that may have been posted as an innocent family home vid (or, sometimes for a more sinister purpose), or created by the minors themselves, who are too young to understand why tickling their cousin or brother/sister's feet is getting them so much attention.

If I was not a ticklephile and I seen a few of those whilst posting home vids of my neices or nephews, I would be ready to kick the arse of the whole damn tickling community. As it were, I'd still like to kick the arses of the people who take something so innocent and make it into pornography. It's a real safe way to get away with pedophile behaviour . . . saying "it's only tickling." People see that online, and they come to associate all of us with the pedos who use it to exploit minors.

Between these reasons, I can honestly say I understand why people are so freaked out by it, and unfortunately that's why we have to be very careful in how we introduce it. Don't treat it like cheap porn, it's not. It's a sacred act of intimacy and affection and if we treat it as such we will find that we attract the quality people we would like to have in our lives.

 

[Marquis De Sade]

I'm guessing posts along these lines have been made before..

All it is, is that I've noticed that quite often on the internet (youtube, dating sites, myspace etc...), I find girls posting "don't message me asking for pictures of my feet" or "please, anyone who wants to know if I'm ticklish and where, go somewhere else". Even worse is when you see young girls on YouTube who are flattered by the attention and actually respond to these requests, not realising that guys are masturbating to their videos.

My own love-life sucks right now, so I joined a dating site yesterday, and surprisingly I was allowed to actually do a search with keywords - so I looked for "ticklish". Just to see if there were any girls on there open to LIKING it: What I found was a good number who mentioned it (maybe they do like it, maybe it means nothing, maybe they welcome the extra attention!) but a good handful that basically said "tickling pests get lost". Ouch

It looks to me like tickling is actually a common fetish, (I noticed tickling sites are top ranked on clips4sale) and that guys with a tickling or foot fetish are basically a nuissance. There's a huge imbalance of guys/girls on this forum (probably because it revolves around porn, which guys consume more of than girls)

Anyway, there's no conclusion to this. It's just an observation and yeah it's a pretty downbeat post: It's not constructive, but it's honest: what can I say - I feel blue. I'm actually kind of ashamed, and I don't think I deserve to be: I've gone my whole life being careful and considerate (too much for my own good, and probably to compensate for feeling my sexuality is a bit fucked up, and seeing this kind of thing doesn't help)

You're not alone in feeling like this.

Hate to break it to some of you, but a lot of foot guys ARE annoying. It's really annoying to get IMed constantly with a guy not introducing himself, no greeting, just requesting pics of feet... Are you barefoot? How big are your feet? Are your feet ticklish? I'm tickling your feet. GAHHH!

It never ceases to amaze me the haze of stupidity those people walk around in all day thinking that works.

Next time it happens, start a new IM account, pretend to be a guy and ask him for pics of his cock. Who knows, that might put a crack in his Wall of Stupid.

But probably not.

 

[Phineas]

Here's something you need to remember... and it doesn't just apply to tickling or foot fetishes, but stuff in general;

The "haters" are generally not the majority - they just scream louder.

I've said it before, but I've never once had any of my fetishes negatively received by any of my girlfriends, dates, or whatever else... and I've dated a lot of women by now. My last girlfriend remarked to her friends that she was dating a "foot guy" and her friends were jealous. Jealous! Can you believe it?

The thing is, we notice the one person who draws more attention to themselves... and in this case, it's the negative Nelly yelling about how much she hates feet. We don't see the six tickle-lovers who're keeping their mouths shut because they're too busy not bitching about things they hate.

When you see people complaining, just remind yourself that they're not complaining about you. You're not the one who did the stuff they're upset about, after all - and if you're that keen on talking to them, then you might want to wait before you spring the fetish on them. But, if there's one thing I've learned... it's that no matter how great someone seems, there's always someone else out there even greater, and ten to one that other one is greater because they're not a hater.

 

[rhiannon]

Phineas, it seems to me thought that you are an educated guy with charme and other stuff on his mind than just the feet of a person. I also am ready to bet that you will not mention your fetish right away.

Other people don't do that, and that is the overall impression people get from foot- and tickling fetishists. They don't get the chance to meet a nice, decent guy who happens to enjoy feet, no, they only meet the creep who is obsessed with feet!

Next time it happens, start a new IM account, pretend to be a guy and ask him for pics of his cock. Who knows, that might put a crack in his Wall of Stupid.

LOL - you wish!!! Usually in IM accounts the guys have a pic of their cock up as an avatar!!!

 

[Phineas]

Phineas, it seems to me thought that you are an educated guy with charme and other stuff on his mind than just the feet of a person. I also am ready to bet that you will not mention your fetish right away.

You're very perceptive. But actually, very often I do mention my fetish right up front because I refuse to date someone who isn't comfortable with it.

The dynamic is probably a little different, though, in that I never answer other people's ads, I just post my own. This way I'm guaranteed to only get fetish-friendly people answering.

But, that said, I also realize that if I run across someone that's loudly screaming how much she hates foot fetishists, I just ignore her and focus on the half-dozen other women who don't hate foot fetishists, because I know they're not the rare and exquisite snowflakes some people here make them out to be. They're really not - they just keep their likes and dislikes private, because that's generally where they belong.

Other people don't do that, and that is the overall impression people get from foot- and tickling fetishists. They don't get the chance to meet a nice, decent guy who happens to enjoy feet, no, they only meet the creep who is obsessed with feet!

I agree. One of the reasons people creep n' sneak is because they think that if they're honest, they won't get what they want. I often try to get people to realize that being open and honest will get them what they want... if they go about it the right way. It's not the revelation that you have a foot fetish that's turning them off, it's the way you're presenting it to them.

A very wise person once told me, "women don't mind if you express attraction to them, as long as you do it respectfully."

'Respectfully' being the key word, here. I fully agree with you that a lot of our fellow foot folk need to work on that one. I've heard it postulated that the reason some of them are so icky about it is because since fetishes are essentially objectification, they really don't care about the person they're targeting, only the objects of their affection. If they saw the girl as a human being with thoughts and feelings and not just as a 'pair of female feet', they'd stand a much better chance of getting somewhere.

I'd like to share a quick anecdote. I have this female friend who I didn't know so good. I'd met her through a mutual friend. Anyhoo, one day I saw her barefoot for the first time and hoo boy, did she have some beautiful toes. So I literally E-mailed her later that night and asked her if she was involved with anyone. When she asked why, I told her flat-out that I had a foot fetish and thought she had beautiful feet. A week later she came on to me at a social outing and I got to 'experience' said feet very thoroughly. Dream come true? Pretty much - but it's proof positive that the direct approach works... although you do have to be capable of typing with more warmth than the average foot fetishist, who uses a lot of what I call 'creeper vocabulary' that just puts people off.

Moral of the story? Get some social skills, learn how to pick someone who'll be receptive, respect her as a person, and go for what you want. You just might be surprised.

* Edited to add;

As another recent thread showed, some people simply don't like feet, and thus don't like us by association. Feet are gross, the logic goes, so anyone who likes them is also gross. There's no point in trying to reason with people like that, most of the time - you simply need to realize that not everyone shares your likes and dislikes and try not to take it personally.

 

[rhiannon]

I totally agree with you.

My theory is that a charming, self-confident, polite guy can enjoy whatever he wants - if he knows what he wants and shows he is comfortable with himself and his likes, I can't imagine any woman being appalled by it - especially if it is something as harmless as feet. Could be different if the guy wants to pee on her! 🙂