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Time to have some pun.

Bugman

Level of Quintuple Garnet Feather
Joined
Feb 4, 2006
Messages
32,843
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Some of these are really, really bad. 😀

•Energizer Bunny arrested - charged with battery.
•A man's home is his castle, in a manor of speaking.
•A pessimist's blood type is always b-negative.
•My wife really likes to make pottery, but to me it's just kiln time.
•Dijon vu - the same mustard as before.

•Practice safe eating - always use condiments.
•I fired my masseuse today. She just rubbed me the wrong way.
•A Freudian slip is when you say one thing but mean your mother.
•Shotgun wedding: A case of wife or death.
•I used to work in a blanket factory, but it folded.

•I used to be a lumberjack, but I just couldn't hack it, so they gave me the axe.
•A man needs a mistress just to break the monogamy.
•Marriage is the mourning after the knot before.
•A hangover is the wrath of grapes.
•Corduroy pillows are making headlines.

•Is a book on voyeurism a peeping tome?
•Dancing cheek-to-cheek is really a form of floor play.
•Banning the bra was a big flop.
•Sea captains don't like crew cuts.
•Does the name Pavlov ring a bell?

•A successful diet is the triumph of mind over platter.
•Time flies like an arrow. Fruit flies like a banana.
•A gossip is someone with a great sense of rumor.
•Without geometry, life is pointless.
•When you dream in color, it's a pigment of your imagination.

•Condoms should be used on every conceivable occasion.
•Reading whilst sunbathing makes you well-red.
•When two egotists meet, it's an I for an I.
•If electricity comes from electrons... does that mean that morality comes from morons?
•I fired my masseuse today. She just rubbed me the wrong way.
 
Some of those were pretty funny. I may use 'em.
BTW - the last one is repeated from the second block.

Thanks for taking the time to share.
 
Some of these are really, really bad. 😀

•Energizer Bunny arrested - charged with battery.
.

My favorite one by far....(If the Energizer Bunny assualts someone, is he charged with battery?) :drinkup:
 
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