Unlucky in love (split from "Lesbians")

[Dr. Bill Kobb]

Okay, last try. We'll beat this S.A.D., lads! Think sunny naked happy Twister fun! :super_hap

 

[brad1701]

Vanilla with sprinkles. Not last place.

(Come on, say you hate me. I can take it! 😛)

 

[Dr. Bill Kobb]

Nah, I don't hate. I'm...worried about you. 🙄

 

[brad1701]

Worried?!
My blood's still red, sir. It just gets pumped with a different lever. 😛

 

[Midnight Circus]

Okay, last try. We'll beat this S.A.D., lads! Think sunny naked happy Twister fun! :super_hap

I think I suffer from a form of autism where I don't find this arousing.

Or I'm dead. I think I might be dead. It would explain a few things.

I appreciate the try, though. We'll see how I receive it in the morning.

 

[Betchass1]

Mmmmmm... nothing cools down a summer's night like vanilla ice cream.

Try again? 😛

I personally find the one with the beer kegs sexy, but posed. Provocative, but intractable. Disingenuous, but unconvincing.

 

[Midnight Circus]

lol I split a thread.

 

[Betchass1]

And you know, there's a part of me that's convinced the tickling thing had something to do with it. I mean, the day I first messaged her, I started poking her, so she knew. She played with me, and was very very good at it too. But things online aren't quite the same as in real life--and it occurs to me sometimes that during those first two days when I tickled her maybe she thought, He's serious about this thing. He wasn't joking. He's gonna do this every day for the rest of our lives. In which case, you know, despite the shit, it would be better that way. I would rather end a relationship six months in than have fifteen years and a kid pass by before it's realised we're fundamentally incompatible.



Something about you just... seems off to them, eh? After that flirty honeymoon period, you feel comfortable enough with them to let them see you at something less than your charming best... and that's how they repay you. Let me tell you something... people who would forsake you for being yourself aren't worth much of anything at all.

You know, one thing I realized from having relationship problems all my life was that I acted like the other person knew whether we should be together and I was just waiting for them to let me know. Then it seemed like they were being cruel and fickle. But that's not always how someone thinks when getting to know someone. You're waiting for some kind of fun before deciding something like that. I think a total rejection that comes shortly after meeting you should be taken as seriously as an immediate decision to marry you.

 

[brad1701]

Oh, I know... (and the marrying thing is uproariously funny for reasons I'll explain later) But I cracked under the pressure of trying to do it in eight days. At the time... I just couldn't do it.
Besides, we HAD fun the first two days... all giggles and smiles and smooching. And then she turned it off.

 

[Midnight Circus]

I take a very proactive role in my relationships. In hindsight, I think that's my problem...caring too much about people who care too little. Or, I'm just one of those weird few who would rather not give up easily.

 

[brad1701]

Yup... I'm a Taurus. The thing about this case is that she'd already spent the previous 9 months vacillating... I don't mind saying I had the patience of a saint. She herself said as much. But when we met... I thought the fight was over. I wasn't PREPARED to take up the struggle again... when you go into battle you have to psych yourself up first.
But yes... normally I don't give up easily.

 

[Midnight Circus]

I didn't mean to insinuate that you did give up easily, if it was taken as such. I meant with regards to my own significant others, I'm a relative anamoly as I'm tenaciously persistent.

 

[brad1701]

Not at all!
What's wrong with trying to make things work? On the other hand, I learned that you can't save people.

 

[Midnight Circus]

Free will is a pain, to be sure.

 

[brad1701]

That's why God invented racks. 😛

 

[Betchass1]

Yup... I'm a Taurus. The thing about this case is that she'd already spent the previous 9 months vacillating... I don't mind saying I had the patience of a saint. She herself said as much. But when we met... I thought the fight was over. I wasn't PREPARED to take up the struggle again... when you go into battle you have to psych yourself up first.
But yes... normally I don't give up easily.

You talk like you needed to earn her.

 

[brad1701]

At the time, I thought I did... I thought I had to fight the good fight, ride into battle to save her from... the other guy? Herself? Part of the problem was me, of course... you're right.

 

[Betchass1]

I think people would rather be infatuated than to be the object of infatuation. Though it seems like it would be nice to have someone being devoted and offering you all kinds of things, love releases addictive chemicals, like cocaine does, and most people would rather use it than supply it.
Maybe this has something to do with why people think they want "equal footing" in a relationship, but then turn around and go after those who don't treat them so well. That way they get to be the one doing the following.

 

[Dr. Bill Kobb]

Intriguing, and probably all too true theory. Well put, too!

 

[brad1701]

I think people would rather be infatuated than to be the object of infatuation. Though it seems like it would be nice to have someone being devoted and offering you all kinds of things, love releases addictive chemicals, like cocaine does, and most people would rather use it than supply it.
Maybe this has something to do with why people think they want "equal footing" in a relationship, but then turn around and go after those who don't treat them so well. That way they get to be the one doing the following.

I wouldn't go quite that far... I didn't want to go on that wild goose chase. I was perfectly happy--we were perfectly happy--during the calm periods. I don't think I would have missed the crap.
But anyway... that was five years ago, so now I would have handled it a lot differently.