bellystrokes
3rd Level Yellow Feather
- Joined
- Feb 21, 2002
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Ok, you knew our country was in trouble, but now you will know why.
A Washington , DC , airport ticket agent offers some examples of why our country is in trouble!
>> 1. I had a New Hampshire Congresswoman ask for an
>> aisle seat so that her hair wouldn't get messed up
>> by being near the window. (On an airplane!)
>> 2. I got a call from a candidate's staffer, who
>> wanted to go to Capetown. I started to explain the
>> length of the flight and the passport information.
>> Then she interrupted me with, "I'm not trying to
>> make you look stupid, but Capetown is in
>> Massachusetts ." Without trying to make her look
>> stupid, I calmly explained, " Cape
>> Cod is in Massachusetts , Capetown is in Africa ." Her
>> response - click.
>> 3. A senior Vermont Congressman called, furious
>> about a Florida package we did. I asked what was
>> wrong with the vacation in Orlando . He said he was
>> expecting an ocean-view room. I tried to explain
>> that's not possible, since Orlando is in the middle
>> of the state. He replied, "Don't lie to me. I looked
>> on the map and Florida is a very thin state!" (OMG)
>> 4. I got a call from a lawmaker's wife who asked,
>> "Is it possible to see England from Canada ?" I said,
>> "No." She said, "But they look so close on the map."
>> (OMG, again!)
>> 5. An aide for a cabinet member once called and
>> asked if he could rent a car in Dallas . When I
>> pulled up the reservation, I noticed he had only a
>> 1-hour layover in Dallas . When I asked him why he
>> wanted to rent a car he said, "I heard Dallas was a
>> big airport, and we will need a car to drive between
>> gates to save time." (Aghhhh!)
>> 6. An Illinois Congresswoman called last week. She
>> needed to know how it was possible that her flight
>> from Detroit left at 8:30 am and got to Chicago at
>> 8:33 am. I explained that Michigan was an hour ahead
>> of Illinois , but she couldn't understand the concept
>> of time zones. Finally, I told her the plane went
>> fast, and she bought that.
>> 7. A New York lawmaker called and asked, "Do
>> airlines put your physical description on your bag
>> so they know whose luggage belongs to whom?" I said,
>> "No, why do you ask?" She replied, "Well, when I
>> checked in with the airline, they put a tag on my
>> luggage that said 'FAT', and I'm overweight. I think
>> that's very rude!"
>> After putting her on hold for a minute while I
>> looked into it (I was laughing), I came back and
>> explained the city code for Fresno , CA is 'FAT' -
>> (Fresno Air Terminal), and the airline was just
>> putting a destination tag on her luggage.
>> 8. A Senator's aide called to inquire about a trip
>> package to Hawaii . After going over all the cost
>> info, she asked, "Would it be cheaper to fly to
>> California , and then take the train to Hawaii ?" (Wooo!)
>> 9. I just got off the phone with a freshman
>> Congressman who asked, "How do I know which plane to
>> get on?" I asked him what exactly he meant, to which
>> he replied, "I was told my flight number is 823, but
>> none of these planes have numbers on them."
>> 10. A lady Senator called and said, "I need to fly
>> to Pepsi-Cola , Florida . Do I have to get on one of
>> those little computer planes?" I asked if she meant
>> fly to Pensacola , Fl. on a commuter plane. She said,
>> "Yeah, whatever, smarty!"
>> 11. A senior Senator called and had a question
>> about the documents he needed in order to fly to
>> China . After a lengthy discussion about passports, I
>> reminded him that he needed a visa. "Oh, no I don't.
>> I've been to China many times and never had to have
>> one of those." I double checked and sure enough, his
>> stay required a visa. When I told him this he said,
>> "Look, I've been to China four times and every time
>> they have accepted my American Express!"
>> 12. A New Mexico Congresswoman called to make
>> reservations, "I want to go from Chicago to Rhino,
>> New York ." I was at a loss for words. Finally, I
>> said, "Are you sure that's the name of the town?"
>> "Yes, what flights do you have?" replied the lady.
>> After some searching, I came back with, "I'm sorry,
>> ma'am, I've looked up every airport code in the
>> country and can't find a Rhino anywhere." The lady
>> retorted, "Oh, don't be silly! Everyone knows where
>> it is. Check your map!" So I scoured a map of the
>> state of New York and finally offered, "You don't
>> mean Buffalo , do you?" The reply? "Whatever! I knew
>> it was a big animal."
>> Now you know why the Government is in the shape
>> that it's in!
A Washington , DC , airport ticket agent offers some examples of why our country is in trouble!
>> 1. I had a New Hampshire Congresswoman ask for an
>> aisle seat so that her hair wouldn't get messed up
>> by being near the window. (On an airplane!)
>> 2. I got a call from a candidate's staffer, who
>> wanted to go to Capetown. I started to explain the
>> length of the flight and the passport information.
>> Then she interrupted me with, "I'm not trying to
>> make you look stupid, but Capetown is in
>> Massachusetts ." Without trying to make her look
>> stupid, I calmly explained, " Cape
>> Cod is in Massachusetts , Capetown is in Africa ." Her
>> response - click.
>> 3. A senior Vermont Congressman called, furious
>> about a Florida package we did. I asked what was
>> wrong with the vacation in Orlando . He said he was
>> expecting an ocean-view room. I tried to explain
>> that's not possible, since Orlando is in the middle
>> of the state. He replied, "Don't lie to me. I looked
>> on the map and Florida is a very thin state!" (OMG)
>> 4. I got a call from a lawmaker's wife who asked,
>> "Is it possible to see England from Canada ?" I said,
>> "No." She said, "But they look so close on the map."
>> (OMG, again!)
>> 5. An aide for a cabinet member once called and
>> asked if he could rent a car in Dallas . When I
>> pulled up the reservation, I noticed he had only a
>> 1-hour layover in Dallas . When I asked him why he
>> wanted to rent a car he said, "I heard Dallas was a
>> big airport, and we will need a car to drive between
>> gates to save time." (Aghhhh!)
>> 6. An Illinois Congresswoman called last week. She
>> needed to know how it was possible that her flight
>> from Detroit left at 8:30 am and got to Chicago at
>> 8:33 am. I explained that Michigan was an hour ahead
>> of Illinois , but she couldn't understand the concept
>> of time zones. Finally, I told her the plane went
>> fast, and she bought that.
>> 7. A New York lawmaker called and asked, "Do
>> airlines put your physical description on your bag
>> so they know whose luggage belongs to whom?" I said,
>> "No, why do you ask?" She replied, "Well, when I
>> checked in with the airline, they put a tag on my
>> luggage that said 'FAT', and I'm overweight. I think
>> that's very rude!"
>> After putting her on hold for a minute while I
>> looked into it (I was laughing), I came back and
>> explained the city code for Fresno , CA is 'FAT' -
>> (Fresno Air Terminal), and the airline was just
>> putting a destination tag on her luggage.
>> 8. A Senator's aide called to inquire about a trip
>> package to Hawaii . After going over all the cost
>> info, she asked, "Would it be cheaper to fly to
>> California , and then take the train to Hawaii ?" (Wooo!)
>> 9. I just got off the phone with a freshman
>> Congressman who asked, "How do I know which plane to
>> get on?" I asked him what exactly he meant, to which
>> he replied, "I was told my flight number is 823, but
>> none of these planes have numbers on them."
>> 10. A lady Senator called and said, "I need to fly
>> to Pepsi-Cola , Florida . Do I have to get on one of
>> those little computer planes?" I asked if she meant
>> fly to Pensacola , Fl. on a commuter plane. She said,
>> "Yeah, whatever, smarty!"
>> 11. A senior Senator called and had a question
>> about the documents he needed in order to fly to
>> China . After a lengthy discussion about passports, I
>> reminded him that he needed a visa. "Oh, no I don't.
>> I've been to China many times and never had to have
>> one of those." I double checked and sure enough, his
>> stay required a visa. When I told him this he said,
>> "Look, I've been to China four times and every time
>> they have accepted my American Express!"
>> 12. A New Mexico Congresswoman called to make
>> reservations, "I want to go from Chicago to Rhino,
>> New York ." I was at a loss for words. Finally, I
>> said, "Are you sure that's the name of the town?"
>> "Yes, what flights do you have?" replied the lady.
>> After some searching, I came back with, "I'm sorry,
>> ma'am, I've looked up every airport code in the
>> country and can't find a Rhino anywhere." The lady
>> retorted, "Oh, don't be silly! Everyone knows where
>> it is. Check your map!" So I scoured a map of the
>> state of New York and finally offered, "You don't
>> mean Buffalo , do you?" The reply? "Whatever! I knew
>> it was a big animal."
>> Now you know why the Government is in the shape
>> that it's in!
Very humorous, but I'm not in the least surprised. 
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