Where did I leave off? Oh yeah, I was sick. The five days following my last post were pretty miserable. It's been years, maybe a decade or more since I've been that sick. 
...LOL...Fever running rampant, a disaster, and to make matters worse the f'n heat went out for two days in building. It was not pleasant, at all.
The one good thing that came from the experience was the fact that it forced me to put the brakes on, and really put them on. I'm just constantly wound up and can never just f'n chill, even without a gallon of coffee racing through me. 😛 I'd say after the first few days and when consciousness became tolerable, it was kinda relaxing to just lay in bed all day and watch youtube. Watching multiple episodes of Behind the Music, or mind-stretching documentaries on existence, reality, or whatever craziness us humans attempt to comprehend.
Speaking of youtube, I'm on it right now and dislike the most recent design change to the site. It's a pain in the ass now to go through the playlists, I'm not feelin' it. 😡 I'm going to post some mellow music in this entry, strange mood tonight. The ups and downs are difficult to level out tonight.
Scrolling through my favs I've come across this song. This song embodies thee darkest days of my life, up until now at least. It was April, right around the time my car got crunched and ultimately totaled. It's still driveable but it's fate is pretty much sealed. At that time, I had still been out of work for almost three years, emotionally, mentally, financially withered and now my f'n car is trashed. To make matters worse, the girl lied about running the red light and in the end I only got half of what I should have for a settlement and couldn't even really buy another car.
With that said, in a twisted way it may have been a blessing in disguise. At that point, I was out of money but again and it enabled me to drift a little further. That's a sign of the times right there, when your car gets smashed and it's a good thing. Now with that said, I did indeed take a bit that $$$ and hit the bottle, HARD. My situation at that point just caused me too crack and all I wanted to do is shut the f**k off. During my days and many times on the road of this life I've put 'em down with the best of them, but this was bad. That became an uncontrolable spiral into the blackest mother f**ker I've ever come up against.
Never again do I want to find myself walking through that valley. Who knows? Maybe someday I'll drink again, but for now I'm done with it. That and my friend at 33 just passed away from alcohol serving as the final nail in his coffin. I'm staying clear from that stuff for a while. How did I even get on this subject? Oh yeah, the song. This song is quite spectaular but it carries a dark lining.....
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The main topic I wanted to write about is starting to play music. I need to get moving here, I've been on this for an hour already and still haven't gotten to what I'm trying to get to. Before I get into that I was posting pictures before on some of these entries but I haven't taken any recent ones. Let me see if I can find some older ones to spice up the post.....
View attachment 340287
View attachment 340288
View attachment 340289
....Those are kinda cool. I miss taking photos and need to get out and about and find something interesting.
Done f'n around....Topic at hand, music. So last Spring I purchased a guitar and started working on my voice, although not in that order. I can't really explain how it happened, it wasn't intentional. It really began I guess when I was rocking Mercenary when I'd be driving. It was like, this music is too epic to not sing along to, at least for me because I really like that band. All I can think is that I must have thought to myself, ''Wow, I really can't sing for shit.''
At some point, something must have clicked and I probably learned how to do a certain thing with my voice. Gained that mind-body connection that becomes enhanced through the learning process. Probably from there thought, ''I can learn how to do this fundamentally correct.'' Got the gears in my brain turning, toss in OCD and the rest is history, fully committed ever since.
Shortly after beginning that, I sold some things to buy a guitar. What's crazy is when I got in the car accident, the first thing I did after getting hit is look in back because the guitar was on the seat. I was thinkin' , '' I hope that's not f'n busted because I can't afford another one.''...LOL...But it was fine, it survived. I'm trying to think how much I want to go into this. We'll rock some music for a second.
Here's a unique version one of Mercenarys slower songs. It's the orignal version with a girls voice superimposed over it and it's really good....
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....One of the first things I noticed when I started playing the guitar was once again the similarites within ''the arts''. I'm not going to into this because I'll be here all night but it's very intriguing to think about. For example, the similarities between boxing and playing the guitar are mindblowing when you look at the core of understanding them or many things for that matter. You can take the elements, say, balance, positioning, timing and in so many ways they are the keys to success.
Balance, positioning, timing, you have to be balanced to be in the right position to land the punch at the right time. Again, you need to balance the guitar to be in the right position to hit the chord or note at the right time. You need to balance your life so you can be in the right position and when the time is right get what you want. You can get the promotion, get the girl, hit the chord, land a right hand or devastating throw and at the core of those achievements could be three simple words. Don't get me wrong, applying those things could prove to be a difficult task but the basic blueprint remains the same.
This music thing has been a hell of a ride. In reality I needed something like this to focus on, and needed it desperately to. For me, I've always grown in a spiritual sense through physical endeavors and pushing myself that way. Those days are dwindling down now and it's been very empty because of it. This musical journey is kind of taking the place of that in a certain sense. In other ways it's allowing the past to live on.
All those years where I pushed myself, and I f'n pushed hard, for a while it seemed like all was lost and everything was done in vain. I'm actually going to shift directions because there's too much depth headed this way, It'd take way too long. I'll just say this, the years of the grind, the pain, on all levels, the sacrifice, the wasted sacrifice, the loneliness, f'n everything, there was so much emotion and effort invested that only I could see and for a while it seemed to die it's death. All that shit helped build the character I have today and through the expressive nature of music I'm going to make sure that it wasn't for nothing.
As far as the guitar goes, it's been a lot of Nirvana for the last several months, to say the least. Growing up I wasn't a huge fan of Nirvana, I never really gave them an honest listen other than a song or two. Which is ironic because I was and still am a big Alice in Chains fan and they occupied the same genre. Basically it's like Kurt Cobain has been my guitar teacher in a way. I'm learning fundamentals of song structure and progression through listening to and first playing his music. I sat here one day during the summer for like 4 hours and learned the solo, minus the vibratos, to ''The Man Who Sold the World'' and at the time I remember it was pretty rewarding and one of the cooler things I had done in a while. With that said, it's been a bit since I've practiced anything on that song.
Another thing I thought when I first started playing was thinking, there's not enough time in life, and I don't know if I've ever thought. There are just so many good songs to aspire to play but you could never learn them all. Songs that I definitely want to learn before I'm dead are ''Down in a Hole'', ''Stillborn''(Acoustic version), ''Descend the Shades of Night''. There are so many but those stand out as absolutes. ''Down in a Hole'' is the most personal song that I could ever learn in this particular lifetime. ''Dirt'' was the first cd I ever owned and I bought it after hearing that song. It's amazing how sometimes the things we gravitate towards early on stay with us for a lifetime.
As far as vocals, quite possibly the most intriguing thing I've ever done. The learning process involved and the development of the aforementioned mind-body connection is like a rubik's cube. In many ways it's like a riddle within yourself. To me it's totally fascinating to have my influences and learn the things that I admire about them and incorporate that into my own style. Not trying to copy or mimic anyone in particular, but learn the techniques you like and apply them to your own unique physical vocal capabilities. All in all I'm having a fun time with it and look forward to possibly one day hearing what kind of sound I cultivated, or what kind of monster I created.
I've been wanting to write about that, it's been causing a log jam in my proverbial stream of thought, so now I can make room for some other madness. I should check this for errors but I'm not, I'm getting antsy in this chair. This might be my last post for a while and in the meantime the UNY gathering will have since taken place. Wow, I don't even know what to expect. I've wanted to meet people from the forum for the longest time now. Play aside, for me just meeting individuals who share the interest in the art of tickling is very meaningful.
''What has been put asunder shall again be whole''
My painkillers are kickin' something fierce right now so I'm about to go lounge on the couch and watch a soon to be chosen DVD. We'll end this with the artists that inspire me most vocally.Thank you fellas...
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...LOL...Fever running rampant, a disaster, and to make matters worse the f'n heat went out for two days in building. It was not pleasant, at all.The one good thing that came from the experience was the fact that it forced me to put the brakes on, and really put them on. I'm just constantly wound up and can never just f'n chill, even without a gallon of coffee racing through me. 😛 I'd say after the first few days and when consciousness became tolerable, it was kinda relaxing to just lay in bed all day and watch youtube. Watching multiple episodes of Behind the Music, or mind-stretching documentaries on existence, reality, or whatever craziness us humans attempt to comprehend.
Speaking of youtube, I'm on it right now and dislike the most recent design change to the site. It's a pain in the ass now to go through the playlists, I'm not feelin' it. 😡 I'm going to post some mellow music in this entry, strange mood tonight. The ups and downs are difficult to level out tonight.
Scrolling through my favs I've come across this song. This song embodies thee darkest days of my life, up until now at least. It was April, right around the time my car got crunched and ultimately totaled. It's still driveable but it's fate is pretty much sealed. At that time, I had still been out of work for almost three years, emotionally, mentally, financially withered and now my f'n car is trashed. To make matters worse, the girl lied about running the red light and in the end I only got half of what I should have for a settlement and couldn't even really buy another car.
With that said, in a twisted way it may have been a blessing in disguise. At that point, I was out of money but again and it enabled me to drift a little further. That's a sign of the times right there, when your car gets smashed and it's a good thing. Now with that said, I did indeed take a bit that $$$ and hit the bottle, HARD. My situation at that point just caused me too crack and all I wanted to do is shut the f**k off. During my days and many times on the road of this life I've put 'em down with the best of them, but this was bad. That became an uncontrolable spiral into the blackest mother f**ker I've ever come up against.
Never again do I want to find myself walking through that valley. Who knows? Maybe someday I'll drink again, but for now I'm done with it. That and my friend at 33 just passed away from alcohol serving as the final nail in his coffin. I'm staying clear from that stuff for a while. How did I even get on this subject? Oh yeah, the song. This song is quite spectaular but it carries a dark lining.....
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The main topic I wanted to write about is starting to play music. I need to get moving here, I've been on this for an hour already and still haven't gotten to what I'm trying to get to. Before I get into that I was posting pictures before on some of these entries but I haven't taken any recent ones. Let me see if I can find some older ones to spice up the post.....
View attachment 340287
View attachment 340288
View attachment 340289
....Those are kinda cool. I miss taking photos and need to get out and about and find something interesting.
Done f'n around....Topic at hand, music. So last Spring I purchased a guitar and started working on my voice, although not in that order. I can't really explain how it happened, it wasn't intentional. It really began I guess when I was rocking Mercenary when I'd be driving. It was like, this music is too epic to not sing along to, at least for me because I really like that band. All I can think is that I must have thought to myself, ''Wow, I really can't sing for shit.''
At some point, something must have clicked and I probably learned how to do a certain thing with my voice. Gained that mind-body connection that becomes enhanced through the learning process. Probably from there thought, ''I can learn how to do this fundamentally correct.'' Got the gears in my brain turning, toss in OCD and the rest is history, fully committed ever since.
Shortly after beginning that, I sold some things to buy a guitar. What's crazy is when I got in the car accident, the first thing I did after getting hit is look in back because the guitar was on the seat. I was thinkin' , '' I hope that's not f'n busted because I can't afford another one.''...LOL...But it was fine, it survived. I'm trying to think how much I want to go into this. We'll rock some music for a second.
Here's a unique version one of Mercenarys slower songs. It's the orignal version with a girls voice superimposed over it and it's really good....
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....One of the first things I noticed when I started playing the guitar was once again the similarites within ''the arts''. I'm not going to into this because I'll be here all night but it's very intriguing to think about. For example, the similarities between boxing and playing the guitar are mindblowing when you look at the core of understanding them or many things for that matter. You can take the elements, say, balance, positioning, timing and in so many ways they are the keys to success.
Balance, positioning, timing, you have to be balanced to be in the right position to land the punch at the right time. Again, you need to balance the guitar to be in the right position to hit the chord or note at the right time. You need to balance your life so you can be in the right position and when the time is right get what you want. You can get the promotion, get the girl, hit the chord, land a right hand or devastating throw and at the core of those achievements could be three simple words. Don't get me wrong, applying those things could prove to be a difficult task but the basic blueprint remains the same.
This music thing has been a hell of a ride. In reality I needed something like this to focus on, and needed it desperately to. For me, I've always grown in a spiritual sense through physical endeavors and pushing myself that way. Those days are dwindling down now and it's been very empty because of it. This musical journey is kind of taking the place of that in a certain sense. In other ways it's allowing the past to live on.
All those years where I pushed myself, and I f'n pushed hard, for a while it seemed like all was lost and everything was done in vain. I'm actually going to shift directions because there's too much depth headed this way, It'd take way too long. I'll just say this, the years of the grind, the pain, on all levels, the sacrifice, the wasted sacrifice, the loneliness, f'n everything, there was so much emotion and effort invested that only I could see and for a while it seemed to die it's death. All that shit helped build the character I have today and through the expressive nature of music I'm going to make sure that it wasn't for nothing.
As far as the guitar goes, it's been a lot of Nirvana for the last several months, to say the least. Growing up I wasn't a huge fan of Nirvana, I never really gave them an honest listen other than a song or two. Which is ironic because I was and still am a big Alice in Chains fan and they occupied the same genre. Basically it's like Kurt Cobain has been my guitar teacher in a way. I'm learning fundamentals of song structure and progression through listening to and first playing his music. I sat here one day during the summer for like 4 hours and learned the solo, minus the vibratos, to ''The Man Who Sold the World'' and at the time I remember it was pretty rewarding and one of the cooler things I had done in a while. With that said, it's been a bit since I've practiced anything on that song.
Another thing I thought when I first started playing was thinking, there's not enough time in life, and I don't know if I've ever thought. There are just so many good songs to aspire to play but you could never learn them all. Songs that I definitely want to learn before I'm dead are ''Down in a Hole'', ''Stillborn''(Acoustic version), ''Descend the Shades of Night''. There are so many but those stand out as absolutes. ''Down in a Hole'' is the most personal song that I could ever learn in this particular lifetime. ''Dirt'' was the first cd I ever owned and I bought it after hearing that song. It's amazing how sometimes the things we gravitate towards early on stay with us for a lifetime.
As far as vocals, quite possibly the most intriguing thing I've ever done. The learning process involved and the development of the aforementioned mind-body connection is like a rubik's cube. In many ways it's like a riddle within yourself. To me it's totally fascinating to have my influences and learn the things that I admire about them and incorporate that into my own style. Not trying to copy or mimic anyone in particular, but learn the techniques you like and apply them to your own unique physical vocal capabilities. All in all I'm having a fun time with it and look forward to possibly one day hearing what kind of sound I cultivated, or what kind of monster I created.
I've been wanting to write about that, it's been causing a log jam in my proverbial stream of thought, so now I can make room for some other madness. I should check this for errors but I'm not, I'm getting antsy in this chair. This might be my last post for a while and in the meantime the UNY gathering will have since taken place. Wow, I don't even know what to expect. I've wanted to meet people from the forum for the longest time now. Play aside, for me just meeting individuals who share the interest in the art of tickling is very meaningful.
''What has been put asunder shall again be whole''
My painkillers are kickin' something fierce right now so I'm about to go lounge on the couch and watch a soon to be chosen DVD. We'll end this with the artists that inspire me most vocally.Thank you fellas...
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