I was interested to see the topic of expert tickling pop up on Tickling Discussion recently. An interesting thread! And it made me nostalgic for the days when I myself was a mere Expert tickler.
This was a long time ago, of course. Since then I have graduated a further two times in my ‘ler status – first to that of Master tickler and then more recently to Tickle Lord. There is nowhere left for me to go from here; Tickle Lord (or Lord of Tickling, if you prefer) is the highest ‘ler status attainable in the art of tickling. Not many people are aware that such a status exists. One can only assume that this is because we are so rare; in fact, there are only 9 of us in the entire world! Many people have said that I am the greatest of all the Tickle Lords. I couldn’t possibly comment; these things are difficult to quantify, after all. What may be worthy to note, however, is that I am the only person to have developed a martial art based on the act of tickling: gargalate, to give its proper name. The idea for gargalate spawned from an incident in which I was the intended target of a brutal mugging. A man – big bugger he was, must have been a bodybuilder or a discus thrower or something – approached me and ordered that I hand over my wallet. When I refused for a second time, he charged at me like an enraged rhinoceros, and, being a person who is averse to violence in all its forms (except female mud wrestling, of which I am an avid spectator), I instinctively adopted a form of defence which I knew would inflict no lasting damage on my assailant. Tickling. I tell you, that guy was giggling and shrieking like a schoolgirl all the way to the police station.
So if you are reading this as an Expert tickler: good for you!
Keep on practising and who knows… Maybe one day you too will become a Tickle Lord - just like me! I mean, it’s not likely. But you can try. ïŠ
Pffff lol
This was a long time ago, of course. Since then I have graduated a further two times in my ‘ler status – first to that of Master tickler and then more recently to Tickle Lord. There is nowhere left for me to go from here; Tickle Lord (or Lord of Tickling, if you prefer) is the highest ‘ler status attainable in the art of tickling. Not many people are aware that such a status exists. One can only assume that this is because we are so rare; in fact, there are only 9 of us in the entire world! Many people have said that I am the greatest of all the Tickle Lords. I couldn’t possibly comment; these things are difficult to quantify, after all. What may be worthy to note, however, is that I am the only person to have developed a martial art based on the act of tickling: gargalate, to give its proper name. The idea for gargalate spawned from an incident in which I was the intended target of a brutal mugging. A man – big bugger he was, must have been a bodybuilder or a discus thrower or something – approached me and ordered that I hand over my wallet. When I refused for a second time, he charged at me like an enraged rhinoceros, and, being a person who is averse to violence in all its forms (except female mud wrestling, of which I am an avid spectator), I instinctively adopted a form of defence which I knew would inflict no lasting damage on my assailant. Tickling. I tell you, that guy was giggling and shrieking like a schoolgirl all the way to the police station.
So if you are reading this as an Expert tickler: good for you!
Keep on practising and who knows… Maybe one day you too will become a Tickle Lord - just like me! I mean, it’s not likely. But you can try. ïŠPffff lol
