I felt this best posted in my blog.
For everyone who is judging me, for not being out of here now, I have this message: You have not seen the condition of my apartment. If this was happening to you, you might not be so arrogant.,
With each passing day, I realize how difficuilt this task is/will be. My father is coming on Friday to help me with things in my apartment. Since I last posted, I found many more pieces of costume jewelry, and pieces which I have to check as to whether they are costume. I've been selling jewelry to a store that buys Gold. Two days ago I sold real Gold. Today, I went, but came up empty, it was costume. Those things will have to be sold when I move back to NY.
Technically, I have a lease here through July 31. I dont want to stay nearly that long. My assistant/friend is going on vacation for several days in June. I promised my father that I would be living in NY by June 1, or at latest, by Father's Day. That gives me.. six weeks.
What complicates this whole thing is the distance between me and my family. When my grandmother died, my aunts, my mom, and I, sold her furniture, and dealt with her clothes. That was easy, because she lived down the street from my mom and me.
I talked to my dad a bit ago. He told me "I love you, and I'm looking forward to seeing you". I hope we have a good weekend. I fear, though, that when he sees the condition of this apartment, the good mood will dissolve rapidly. Basically, the condition of the apartment is not his problem to worry about. He;s in the process of selling his company, so he's very busy. I'm the one that has to deal with all this.
Everyone knows how much I adored my mom, and how much I miss her. I will say that there is a level of me that is angry at her that she left things in such a condition for me to deal with. My room, to be honest, is slightly cluttered, but... my aunt saw it when she was here, and told me "Mitchell, your room is normal clutter". I have a few clothes at the bottom of my closet that I need to try on, and maybe throw out, and the big chest in my bedroom has a lot of stuff in it. I think I can finish my room in.. less than a week. The big question for me, is what happens with my mom's room, when my dad sees it, and what happens with the third bedroom, where there is more shit, and all the breakables.
If my aunts were able to help me handle this, I wouldnt even have my dad here. The fact that they live so far away, cant visit me to help, and I dont have a signifcant other to help me with this, means its needed for him to come. While I warned him of the condition of the apartment.. and he promised he isnt going to get upset when he sees it, what someone says, and what they do when they see something, can be very different. My prediction, is that he's probably going to say something like "Mitch, your mother was all fucked up, and I feel sorry that she left all of this for you to deal with". If he says that, I'm not going to dispute him, because. each night when I find more shit in my mom;'s room, my thoughts are exactly the same. "Mom, I love you forever, and I miss you like crazy, but how the fuck didnt you clean up any of this shit, before something happened to you?" I'm going to ask my dad not to tell Cheryl (His wife) my uncle, or my dad's friends about any of this. I just dont want my mom smeared to people that didnt like her. While my mom never met Cheryl, my uncle and my mom hated each other.
I can actually clean/pack/unpack quickly when I wanted to. When my mom and I moved from one apartment in Fort Lee NhJ to another in 1994, I had just gradated college, and was very depressed. I could not handle unpacking. There were cartons all over my room, and my computer wasnt even hooked up for a few weeks. Finally, i started unpacking, and managed to get everything unpacked and my computer hooked up in less than 2 days.
Bottom line: I have to be out of here by Mid June. I'm dreading the task of finishing it all, because, as bad as my mom's room is, and its bad, I havent even dealt with the den yet. That is almost as bad,.
Mitch
For everyone who is judging me, for not being out of here now, I have this message: You have not seen the condition of my apartment. If this was happening to you, you might not be so arrogant.,
With each passing day, I realize how difficuilt this task is/will be. My father is coming on Friday to help me with things in my apartment. Since I last posted, I found many more pieces of costume jewelry, and pieces which I have to check as to whether they are costume. I've been selling jewelry to a store that buys Gold. Two days ago I sold real Gold. Today, I went, but came up empty, it was costume. Those things will have to be sold when I move back to NY.
Technically, I have a lease here through July 31. I dont want to stay nearly that long. My assistant/friend is going on vacation for several days in June. I promised my father that I would be living in NY by June 1, or at latest, by Father's Day. That gives me.. six weeks.
What complicates this whole thing is the distance between me and my family. When my grandmother died, my aunts, my mom, and I, sold her furniture, and dealt with her clothes. That was easy, because she lived down the street from my mom and me.
I talked to my dad a bit ago. He told me "I love you, and I'm looking forward to seeing you". I hope we have a good weekend. I fear, though, that when he sees the condition of this apartment, the good mood will dissolve rapidly. Basically, the condition of the apartment is not his problem to worry about. He;s in the process of selling his company, so he's very busy. I'm the one that has to deal with all this.
Everyone knows how much I adored my mom, and how much I miss her. I will say that there is a level of me that is angry at her that she left things in such a condition for me to deal with. My room, to be honest, is slightly cluttered, but... my aunt saw it when she was here, and told me "Mitchell, your room is normal clutter". I have a few clothes at the bottom of my closet that I need to try on, and maybe throw out, and the big chest in my bedroom has a lot of stuff in it. I think I can finish my room in.. less than a week. The big question for me, is what happens with my mom's room, when my dad sees it, and what happens with the third bedroom, where there is more shit, and all the breakables.
If my aunts were able to help me handle this, I wouldnt even have my dad here. The fact that they live so far away, cant visit me to help, and I dont have a signifcant other to help me with this, means its needed for him to come. While I warned him of the condition of the apartment.. and he promised he isnt going to get upset when he sees it, what someone says, and what they do when they see something, can be very different. My prediction, is that he's probably going to say something like "Mitch, your mother was all fucked up, and I feel sorry that she left all of this for you to deal with". If he says that, I'm not going to dispute him, because. each night when I find more shit in my mom;'s room, my thoughts are exactly the same. "Mom, I love you forever, and I miss you like crazy, but how the fuck didnt you clean up any of this shit, before something happened to you?" I'm going to ask my dad not to tell Cheryl (His wife) my uncle, or my dad's friends about any of this. I just dont want my mom smeared to people that didnt like her. While my mom never met Cheryl, my uncle and my mom hated each other.
I can actually clean/pack/unpack quickly when I wanted to. When my mom and I moved from one apartment in Fort Lee NhJ to another in 1994, I had just gradated college, and was very depressed. I could not handle unpacking. There were cartons all over my room, and my computer wasnt even hooked up for a few weeks. Finally, i started unpacking, and managed to get everything unpacked and my computer hooked up in less than 2 days.
Bottom line: I have to be out of here by Mid June. I'm dreading the task of finishing it all, because, as bad as my mom's room is, and its bad, I havent even dealt with the den yet. That is almost as bad,.
Mitch
