Ok I've written the odd note in facebook when I can be bothered to visit that place so I'm assuming a blog is the same deal. Just write what's on your thoughts. After last weekend I have plenty of things to think about.
A year ago, not long after my last g/f and I broke up, and a year after my dad died, I decided to change certain things about myself. I didn't like myself at all, and most of it stemmed with my inability to initiate anything. So I decided to cut my hair first of all. It had been long for about 10 years, since a couple years after arriving in the USA, and I was dying for a change. I decided to eat better and work out, just to see if I could get this metabolism of mine under a little bit of control and actually save some of that protein so I went off and got myself a gym membership. I started dating a beautiful girl (largely due to a facebook note I wrote coincidentally which she said had 'moved' her...oh yes, I moved someone), and my friend Jake, a comic artist, came to me asking if I would like to do a graphic novel with him. A year later and I'm no longer dating Kate, and although we are still working on it now and again, the novel thing is still pretty nonexistent after a year. Got a story. An awesome story if I say so myself (and I don't brag much, but I'm proud of this story), a story I'm very enthusiastic about...getting pictures from him on the other hand is like pulling teeth.
Then a month ago, I decided to come back into the TMF. I'd been lurking around the community since about 1997, back when alt.multimedia.tk was the newsgroup of choice if you wanted to chat with community members. The community back then, I don't remember being as lovable is it is now. Hell there was even some psychopathic blackmailing identity-theft expert named Terri lurking around who was eventually caught by the FBI I think. He'd pretend to be a girl, lure men to do tickle videos, then destroy their lives if they didn't come back for more.
Anyways, for 10 years I had come and gone very briefly, checking to see what new contributions people had given, whether BAC was drawing again, etc. Then a couple months ago, I decided to head into the general discussion forum, and was stuck there all night. So many fantastic people who got along so very well, and to top it off the forum was full of women. I think I was so amazed at that little fact that I posted a thank-you note directed at every female on here. I made a new profile, using the screen name I had used for many things for years (filthy weasels are what I endearingly called the ferrets at my first job - a local pet shop) and decided to make myself better known. Soon after, I got a PM from a very friendly and trusting Skippy, soon after that we were on the phone, and soon after that, making plans to go to Bella's. Throwing yourself into something you've always been too shy to do is so much fun!
I really did want more of an intimate friendly party setting than what I'd been hearing about nest. For my first time I really did prefer that to a convention. So after some crap at work, I finally managed to get the time off. There was an issue involving transportation which Musicroxmysox graciously solved for me, thank you luv.
Bella's was amazing. I didn't feel well for most of it, but I basically ignored that as best as I could. However I was still a little of a wallflower. Hard to jump into conversations that are reminiscing about past gatherings, but it was fun to listen and get to know people better in that way. When all the, uh, pwning started I had no idea what to do. I just kinda sat there. I became very interested in Lee's hypnosis, as I'd never seen it happen before and had always wanted to be hypnotized. So one day at the hotel in Viper's room, she tried it on me, but after 2 goes it still didn't seem to work. Then again, I'd taken excedrin, dayquil (not to be taken together I later found out) and a glass of absinthe. I really hoped the hypnosis would work, but I've never been able to meditate after a decade of dabbling in yoga with guided meditations. Some part of my mind is expecting to experience something a little too much. I wanted to be a little more ticklish below my waist. My legs and feet have a sensitivity to them, but nothing that would make me laugh, not even my knees. I'd never really known whether I was a Lee or a Ler, having no experience, so I figured this would help me a little. She's had some great luck with Impaler and Korastus and the entertaining things she'd made them do, but it still didn't seem to work with me. So instead, as I mentioned I'd never been tickled before and didn't know where my interests truly lay, she wrecked me. Believe me, it really opened my eyes. I'm still a little on the shy side when it comes to being the 'ler for now, but I think I'd be comfortable in the role of a switch given enough experience. It's just the playfullness of it all and the fact that the ler's attention is focused entirely on you. It was fun. And for at least a day it loosened me up a little...or maybe that was the absinthe 🙂. I was right back to being quiet and shy come the main party of course, but it was so much fun. I was intending to go with what kered told me and thicken the accent a bit, but with all the sensory input going on, I found myself going back again and again to my retail voice...the subconscious accent I use when talking to you people so you understand me better. It was funny watching people suddenly notice I was a foreigner after I had talked to them for a couple minutes.
I feel I got what I went for in going to Bella's. I wanted to hang out, bullshit with folks, and come away with new friends and a better understanding of the community as a whole. I left there feeling as though I now have friends that I'm connected with on a whole new plane. Being in a situation and among people where I am completely free and comfortable with something I have kept to myself my entire life. I also left with even more. I always knew that living near Philly, I lived close to a few TMFers, but now I know some, and they're awesome, a couple live a stone's throw away and I'll be hanging out with them next week.
New door in my life. I'm leaping through. You guys are fantastic.
A year ago, not long after my last g/f and I broke up, and a year after my dad died, I decided to change certain things about myself. I didn't like myself at all, and most of it stemmed with my inability to initiate anything. So I decided to cut my hair first of all. It had been long for about 10 years, since a couple years after arriving in the USA, and I was dying for a change. I decided to eat better and work out, just to see if I could get this metabolism of mine under a little bit of control and actually save some of that protein so I went off and got myself a gym membership. I started dating a beautiful girl (largely due to a facebook note I wrote coincidentally which she said had 'moved' her...oh yes, I moved someone), and my friend Jake, a comic artist, came to me asking if I would like to do a graphic novel with him. A year later and I'm no longer dating Kate, and although we are still working on it now and again, the novel thing is still pretty nonexistent after a year. Got a story. An awesome story if I say so myself (and I don't brag much, but I'm proud of this story), a story I'm very enthusiastic about...getting pictures from him on the other hand is like pulling teeth.
Then a month ago, I decided to come back into the TMF. I'd been lurking around the community since about 1997, back when alt.multimedia.tk was the newsgroup of choice if you wanted to chat with community members. The community back then, I don't remember being as lovable is it is now. Hell there was even some psychopathic blackmailing identity-theft expert named Terri lurking around who was eventually caught by the FBI I think. He'd pretend to be a girl, lure men to do tickle videos, then destroy their lives if they didn't come back for more.
Anyways, for 10 years I had come and gone very briefly, checking to see what new contributions people had given, whether BAC was drawing again, etc. Then a couple months ago, I decided to head into the general discussion forum, and was stuck there all night. So many fantastic people who got along so very well, and to top it off the forum was full of women. I think I was so amazed at that little fact that I posted a thank-you note directed at every female on here. I made a new profile, using the screen name I had used for many things for years (filthy weasels are what I endearingly called the ferrets at my first job - a local pet shop) and decided to make myself better known. Soon after, I got a PM from a very friendly and trusting Skippy, soon after that we were on the phone, and soon after that, making plans to go to Bella's. Throwing yourself into something you've always been too shy to do is so much fun!
I really did want more of an intimate friendly party setting than what I'd been hearing about nest. For my first time I really did prefer that to a convention. So after some crap at work, I finally managed to get the time off. There was an issue involving transportation which Musicroxmysox graciously solved for me, thank you luv.
Bella's was amazing. I didn't feel well for most of it, but I basically ignored that as best as I could. However I was still a little of a wallflower. Hard to jump into conversations that are reminiscing about past gatherings, but it was fun to listen and get to know people better in that way. When all the, uh, pwning started I had no idea what to do. I just kinda sat there. I became very interested in Lee's hypnosis, as I'd never seen it happen before and had always wanted to be hypnotized. So one day at the hotel in Viper's room, she tried it on me, but after 2 goes it still didn't seem to work. Then again, I'd taken excedrin, dayquil (not to be taken together I later found out) and a glass of absinthe. I really hoped the hypnosis would work, but I've never been able to meditate after a decade of dabbling in yoga with guided meditations. Some part of my mind is expecting to experience something a little too much. I wanted to be a little more ticklish below my waist. My legs and feet have a sensitivity to them, but nothing that would make me laugh, not even my knees. I'd never really known whether I was a Lee or a Ler, having no experience, so I figured this would help me a little. She's had some great luck with Impaler and Korastus and the entertaining things she'd made them do, but it still didn't seem to work with me. So instead, as I mentioned I'd never been tickled before and didn't know where my interests truly lay, she wrecked me. Believe me, it really opened my eyes. I'm still a little on the shy side when it comes to being the 'ler for now, but I think I'd be comfortable in the role of a switch given enough experience. It's just the playfullness of it all and the fact that the ler's attention is focused entirely on you. It was fun. And for at least a day it loosened me up a little...or maybe that was the absinthe 🙂. I was right back to being quiet and shy come the main party of course, but it was so much fun. I was intending to go with what kered told me and thicken the accent a bit, but with all the sensory input going on, I found myself going back again and again to my retail voice...the subconscious accent I use when talking to you people so you understand me better. It was funny watching people suddenly notice I was a foreigner after I had talked to them for a couple minutes.
I feel I got what I went for in going to Bella's. I wanted to hang out, bullshit with folks, and come away with new friends and a better understanding of the community as a whole. I left there feeling as though I now have friends that I'm connected with on a whole new plane. Being in a situation and among people where I am completely free and comfortable with something I have kept to myself my entire life. I also left with even more. I always knew that living near Philly, I lived close to a few TMFers, but now I know some, and they're awesome, a couple live a stone's throw away and I'll be hanging out with them next week.
New door in my life. I'm leaping through. You guys are fantastic.
