Bad ideas involving tickling. (for everyone's safety!)

[Slappy McGee]

ForgottenTickler, in another post, suggested that there is no bad idea involving tickling. I personally disagree, and think we shoudl all come togetehr and compile a list of these bad ideas, so nobody gets hurt.

here are a few I thought of:

It is a bad idea to tickle someone while drinking gasoline.

It is a bad idea to get tickled during open heart surgery.

It is a bad idea to tickle the ribs of the driver of a motorcycle that is going 100 mph while you are sitting behind him/her holding on.

It might be a bad idea to tickle someone's feet with a fork, and then stick said fork into a wall outlet.

It is probably a bad idea to sneak up and tickle someone in the middle of a funeral.

It is definately a bad idea to tickle attack a cop who has pulled you over for speeding, and then when they beg for you to stop, say "what are you going to shoot me or something, you big baby?"

It might not be a good idea to tickle charles manson.

It is not a good idea to fly to Afghanistan, start looking in caves, and keep repeating "where is that little fucker? I'm gonna tickle the shit out of him."

And finally, it is probably not a good idea to tickle the judge during your sexual harrassment trial.

Please everyone else add to this list. WE need to be safe!

 

[TheRhythmDoctor]

ROFLMAO!!!

 

[TickledToDeath]

LMAO!!!

I add this:

Probably not a good idea to tickle the pits or ribs of someone who is hanging on for dear life over a Cliff or is HOLDING ON to someone who is hanging over a cliff.

TTD


PS. A long time ago, I did tickle the exposed bare feet of a girl kneeling in front of me in Church!

She screamed Out a laugh!!! Everyone looked.

I had to be practically sedated and carried out and nearly broke a blood vessle trying NOT to laugh.

 

[P.H. Tickler]

my $0.02

There are some real precautions...

1. NEVER EVER tickle a sleeping woman awake! Even if she lets you other times.... OUCH!
2. If she's ticklish, AND you're going after both feet... GET a good grip on the ankles!!! (light binding is good) <<== Black eye and bloody lip :-( (but THAT didn't save her

)
3. Toe-sucking a hyper ticklish woman is just ASKING for minor lacerations in your mouth ;-) ((( but always worth the risk ))).
4. ALWAYS steady yourself BEFORE starting, those ticklish gals buck worse than a mechanical bull on 10 ! (( after three throws, break out the rope ))

 

[Mimi]

I have one to add here, that actually spawns from a real life incident that happened a few days ago:

Never, EVER tickle your wives feet when she is in labor! I know her feet up in stirrups may be quite the temptation, but by all means, HAVE SOME RESPECT! LOL!

Mimi

 

[tklr5150]

Sure, NOW you all tell me!

Also, as I've learned the hard way, it's never a good idea to tickle someone who's holding the rope that's holding the safe that's hanging over your head. Leads to an owie.

 

[Dave2112]

Just a little tip from your resident Jedi...

...now matter how far down you set the intensity adjustment, a lightsaber blade CANNOT be set to "just tickle a little".

Trust me on this one.

 

[tklr5150]

He goes through more ticklees that way . . . .

 

[Capt. Spalding]

Gasoline, indeed! I should flame you...

OK, listen up! Take it from one who knows... from both sides now (Cue
the record!).
Never, ever tickle someone who is in mid-swig from a nigh-full can
of Dr. Pepper.
Oy! The mess... not to mention the weird feeling when the bubbles
tsunami through your nose...

 

[Scooby112211]

It might be a bad idea to tickle someone's feet with a fork, and then stick said fork into a wall outlet.

Now that, my friends, is classic.

tklr5150, you've been hangin around me and dave too long
(don't get me wrong bro, you were right there with the joke

 

[Marauder]

Another one from real-life experiences:

Always, ALWAYS make sure the perosn you're about to tickle is more ticklish and NOT a better tickler then you, unless you want to see a lopsided tickle-fight from the business end. Oh, thinking back - the horror, the HORROR! *shivers at the remembrance*

 

[Maria_Rose]

Be very careful when tickling a woman with PMS...you are just asking to get the hell beat out of you lol.

 

[mysterytic]

Not good ideas

Tickling a barefoot beauty's foot while is stretched out on a ladder changing a lightbulb.

Giving a waitress carrying a tray of meals a ramdom "tickle test".

Unfortunately I sometimes take "stupid pills" because the above two are from my lifetime experiences. Neither was a smart move. Luckily she was not hurt and the damage was minimal.

 

[Slappy McGee]

a few more....

don't tickle a member of the bomb squad while they are on the job.

don't use a tickle attack to try to thwart a bank robbery.

think twice before asking local street thugs if they want to tickle you.

don't smoke crack while being tickled; you might break your crack pipe!



thanks for all the great responses..... I feel safer already

 

[Dave2112]

Tickling a working surgeon is almost as bad as dropping a Junior Mint into the open cavity.

 

[tklr5150]

Who's gonna turn down a junior mint?! It's chocolate, it's peppermint -- it's delicious!

It is good.

It's VERY refreshing!!

 

[mpath]

Never tickle the shit out of ANYone....very messy

 

[QBWeaver]

Don't tickle anyone carrying an expensive object that's breakable like a family heirloom which was (I repeat WAS) a beautiful crystal vase. (It flew into the air and landed shattering into hundreds of little fragments.


Also.


Don't surprise tickle someone who's bent over picking up something out of the trunk of the car. The knot on the head and stitches sure didn't make that any fun.

 

[DallasFootTickler]

Tickling a working surgeon is almost as bad as dropping a Junior Mint into the open cavity.

LOL! Seinfeld right?

-DFT

 

[dvnc]

Know your 'lee. Some of 'em are lethal. Little QBWeaver has been known to pitch folks off of furniture, and has bruised several 'lers unintentionally. When a body says to tie 'em, tie 'em! Ask Boomtown13.

When someone says they're gonna throw up, believe 'em. (one o' the older kids in grade school did)

Don't tickle unbound people that know martial arts. *ouch*

Never tickle someone who's armed. Never tried it. Never will.

dvnc

 

[QBWeaver]

DVNC you crack me up Sir! (But you already knew that!)

Poor Boomtown! The knot on his head and on mine left vivid reminders of why you shouldn't tickle me without me being bound.

But as far as tickling someone who's armed... I'm armed. I have two. One on the left and one on the right! Does that count? Does that mean I can get away with NO tickling from now on?

heheheheh

(Yes, I already know the answer! LOL)

 

[Dave2112]

While tickling anywhere on the human body is acceptable, tickling internal organs is frowned upon by most.

 

[DallasFootTickler]

Organs are off limits, yes, but one can tickle a funny bone, can one not?



-DFT

 

[guitman69]

While tickling anywhere on the human body is acceptable, tickling internal organs is frowned upon by most.

It can also get pretty messy. All that blood all over the place.

You also would not want to tickle someones eyes. (they're not internal unless you close your eye lids)

 

[laughter_n_love]

I just discovered this thread, and I want to play too....

Never tickle someone who is facing a Roger Clemens fast ball.

Never tickle someone who is sharpening the lawn mower blade.

Never ticke someone who has just consumed a large quantity of coffee and baked beans.

Never tickle someone named Knuckles, Snakes, Crusher, or Gorilla.

Never tickle someone while scuba diving and observing man eating sharks.

Never tickle someone while trimming your own nostril hairs.

Never tickle someone who is running with scissors (we know what happens then, don't we?).

And never tickle someone who is playing Jenga or building a house of cards for money.