How would you feel if the tickling fetish went mainstream?

[rhiannon]

Yes, the practice is uncommon but that doesn't mean a large majority isn't somewhat interested in tickling or wouldn't be interested. Quite the opposite is true and its usually because people assume that its uncommon or "abnormal" that they don't actually experiment. This was what I was pointing too with the phrase "pluralistic ignorance". A lot of people don't want to be labeled "abnormal" or think of themselves this way, so they don't 'give it a shot'.

Tickling itself is perfectly normal and a social thing. I wouldn't say people are "interested" in it, but it's a fun thing between parents and children, between friends and so on.

Tickling as a fetish is uncommon. It does not belong to the vanilla world. Thus, it is "abnormal", not mainstream, because the majority of people does not include it into their sex life any further than flirting.

And yes - a lot of people do not want to be labeled as "abnormal" (although I don't know why), which is why there are some people around who claim that having a tickling fetish is mainstream. But sorry - it isn't!

 

[solescratcher99]

I'm not sure why you insist on keeping tickling (as a sexual act) to only a select group. Especially when there's evidence to the contrary. But, if I can't convince you with evidence, then all I have left is my Dr. Cox impression.

 

[SlaverTickler]

I usually call tickling the stepchild of BDSM....most people who call themselves hardcore bdsm-fans either laugh about it (no pun intended) or say it's too hard. I think it is a sub-direction of BDSM.

And sure, it can be used as foreplay, but not to the extent we like it.

Yeah, most hard core BDSMer think it's silly... until you tie them down and tickle them. Then they are screaming for there lives and offering you the sould of there first born to get you to stop, and thats only in the first couple of minuets.

 

[c7_assassin]

Quite the opposite is true and its usually because people assume that its uncommon or "abnormal" that they don't actually experiment. This was what I was pointing too with the phrase "pluralistic ignorance".

I think you're getting hung up on the word "abnormal", solescratcher. I don't think you'll find any people who believe that there's anything "wrong" with tickling on this forum. It's just that it's still on the fringes, even in a society that's getting familiar with fetishes and BDSM. I mean, we're all fetishists here, did you think rhiannon was calling anyone a freak?

 

[Onlyfornow]

That's pretty damn cool.

I second this.

 

[rhiannon]

I'm not sure why you insist on keeping tickling (as a sexual act) to only a select group. Especially when there's evidence to the contrary. But, if I can't convince you with evidence, then all I have left is my Dr. Cox impression.

I insist on it because tickling as a sexual act IS only done by a selected group! Are you seriously, in all earnest, trying to tell me that the majority of people has a set of restraints in their bedroom and ties their partner down regularly for a prolonged tickling session?

If that is what you are trying to point out here, then how come so many people here have trouble finding someone to share their fantasy with them? Then how come so many people on here are embarrassed because of their fetish, if it is something everybody does?

Maybe "abnormal" isn't the right word, since to many people it has a certain connotation to negativity. To me, it doesn't. To me, "abnormal" just means "different from the norm", while "norm" is defined as "a standard or pattern, esp of social behavior, that is typical of a group". So we are different from the standard....there is nothing wrong with that!

It's the same with the term "fetish". A lot of people don't like to call what we have "fetish", since to many people fetish has a sick connotation. It used to, but in the meantime, "fetish" is just a fashionable word in terms of sexuality!

 

[chicago]

I insist on it because tickling as a sexual act IS only done by a selected group! Are you seriously, in all earnest, trying to tell me that the majority of people has a set of restraints in their bedroom and ties their partner down regularly for a prolonged tickling session?

I don't own a set of restraints, nor do I engage in prolonged sessions, but my boyfriend knows I'm into it and we indulge in a number of different ways. If you're defining tickling as a sexual act, as what you described in your example then yeah, it's probably a very slim minority.

 

[rhiannon]

That's what I am referring to. A little playful tickle here and there is totally different, although I still know a lot of people who don't look at that as being sexual. I wouldn't dare to give any numbers or percentages here though as I am just not sure about it how many people actually do integrate it into their sex life...could be 50-50 or 80-20 one way or another, I really have no clue!

All I know is that aside from one exception who is into BDSM, everybody I talk to about tickling is really surprised that I see something sexual in it.

 

[chicago]

The thing is, you're defining using tickling in sexual activities as having a fetish basically. Using bondage and the like and being very extreme to one side. And everyone else is just getting a poke here or there (no pun intended.)

I think there are a lot of different ways people incorporate tickling into their sex lives. It doesn't have to be one extreme or the other. And if you think about it in the way I'm explaining, then perhaps there is a larger amount of people that engage in sexual tickling in their relationship.

 

[rhiannon]

Not really. My definition of a fetish is "being turned on by something that usually isn't a turn-on". I know that is not how a fetish is defined in the dictionary, but I think nowadays if you talk about a fetish that is what's meant by it, although most people probably just think of bondage and leather and stuff like that when they hear the term.

The poke here and there (I'm putting it simple here) on the other hand I wouldn't really call "engage in sexual tickling". It's playing around to me. No doubt, tickling is something that everybody does, and it's also done to fool around in bed. But that doesn't necessarily mean people are turned on by it.

 

[chicago]

Maybe you aren't understanding me.

The thing I'm pointing out is that you're dealing with extremes here. Either you're using bondage and having prolonged tickle sessions, or you are only getting a poke here or there.

There are shades of gray here that you aren't bringing up, or maybe that you aren't aware of.

For example, like I said, I don't own restraints and my tickling sessions don't last for hours, but my boyfriend and I do incorporate tickling into our sex life. Would you consider me "normal"?

Places like Spencers and Lovers Lane (stores in the US that have sell your run of the mill mainstream sex toys and such) sell tickling related stuff like feather duster looking things, I've seen something called "tickle powder." And likely, to us, this stuff looks cheesey and watered down to what we're used to, but it's items designed for the mainstream.

So you have to question your ideas of mainstream, sexual, and so on when things like that are being mass produced for more than just the people posting on this forum.

 

[rhiannon]

Right now I only know what you don't do, but you didn't tell me what exactly you do, so I can't tell you if I would consider you "normal". (You don't have to answer that of course if it's too indiscrete).

So right now I am not aware of YOUR shade of grey.

I know about those feather duster things. I also said before I think a most people enjoy soft tingly touches of fingers or feathers. It's not what I consider "real" tickling, and I also don't consider enjoying that having a tickling fetish. Maybe it's just a problem of definition though.

Every sex shop sells handcuffs and stuff like that, and a lot of people buy them. But I would say probably only 10% of the people who own handcuffs for sex games are actually into BDSM or have a bondage fetish, if that many. Just because supplies are sold doesn't mean something is mainstream!

 

[chicago]

Well I think what solescratcher was getting at was that many people may involve tickling in their sex lives, but you took it as many people have a tickling fetish.

What you consider to be true or not true does not apply to everyone else. So, sure, you may not consider tickling to be mainstream because you don't consider a feather to be a real tickling tool or whathaveyou, but items are not going to be sold in a store unless people are continually buying them. That right there, should tell you that a number of people are probably experimenting with tickling.

If you use handcuffs, that is a form of bondage. The people using them might not be full fledged bdsm veterans, but they are incorporating bondage in their sex lives for sure.

I'm not saying tickling is completely mainstream. I think bondage is pretty mainstream to an extent. There are of course shades of gray, like I said. I think tickling is a lot more mainstream than you may choose to believe. And perhaps you are defining things a bit too narrowly.

And I think it's safe to say if I've been on this site for six years that I'm not entirely normal.

 

[rhiannon]

I think this is much more about personal definition of terms than anything else. How about we just agree on not being completely normal and liking it?

 

[girlboundforfun]

I wouldn't like it. I think that you would get a lot of people who were just into it because it was trendy and you would get a lot of bad ticklers. I think that the quality of tickle videos would just get really bad because anyone with a get rich quick scheme would try and do it, I mean we see a lot of that already as is. I guess that there would be more material available to people if they wanted it, but would it really be any good? I think it would get really boring if it was something that everyone was able to talk to you about. Like instead of "did you sleep with her?" it was "did you tickle her?". Would there be tickle ads like there are so many sexualized ads now? It would just become too common and I don't think it would have the same effect on me. I enjoy it being a fetish, I don't want it to be mainstream.

As far as I can see, this has already happened.

 

[Amnesiac]

I've often thought that the whole mainstream debate thing was about resources than about acceptance.

I mean, so many of us here, depending on generation gaps, are pretty much used to and comfortable with keeping the tickling fetish/philia thing secret: it preserves our unusually sensitive-to-judgment natures AND lends an air of "naaaaaauuuuuuuuuuughtiness" to the community, which is kind of a thrill.

But at the same time, as MTJ, Agencies & Achilles Heel Art have demonstrated, there's always been an interest in having the community materials of a higher grade than say, crudely drawn crayon pictures and grainy home-movie-camera S-VHS camcorder videos. I think we've always wanted the kind of professionalism and quality control that is afforded the mainstream but without the exposure.

And contemplating mainstream is one way we've thought about how it could happen. The aforementioned companies above have been experimenting with that kind of expansion quite seriously for the last 2 years now and I like it. Not to mention the work that AddieJuniper and her kind have been doing with videos I think the future looks brighter once we get some film students delving into the adult fetish world and graphic design artists who happen to draw their own Vellicatrices Unlimited fanzines in their spare time.

But until there's a massive cultural shift of introspection and understanding about the kink communities similar to the sexual revolution--but hopefully without the chaos, drugs, government overreaction and shitty, pretentious, self-absorbed politics and music (Emo's bad enough as it is)--any attempt at tickling going mainstream is not only unlikely to happen outside of producers who are aware of it, but is going to be disastrous.

I mean, can you imagine the kind of fallout that would occur for PARENTS if tickling goes mainstream during the "To Catch A Predator" pedophile paranoia phase our culture is going through right now? You'll see a whole generation of new members who have NO childhood tickling stories or memories at all...come to think of it, I wonder how these hypothetical members would even become aware of their interest.

 

[rhiannon]

I mean, can you imagine the kind of fallout that would occur for PARENTS if tickling goes mainstream during the "To Catch A Predator" pedophile paranoia phase our culture is going through right now? You'll see a whole generation of new members who have NO childhood tickling stories or memories at all...come to think of it, I wonder how these hypothetical members would even become aware of their interest.

You are mentioning my exact fears here.

 

[Master feathers]

I would welcome that fact ...for one thing ,it would probably open up many to this fetish ,who didn't know it exists ...

 

[Mephistopheles]

No. I like it just the way it is. As it has been pointed out before being outside of the mainstream creates much more of a community.

And more importantly I prefer this site to be found only by people who enter the word "tickling" in google. Not by people I might know in real life; I have no desire at all of anyone I personally know to read my ramblings here. So if it were to happen I'd politely ask Myriads to delete my account or something like that.

And I still don't know what the benefits are except for coming out of the closet. And I personally like my closet very, very much.

 

[rhiannon]

I would welcome that fact ...for one thing ,it would probably open up many to this fetish ,who didn't know it exists ...

Why would it? I didn't need to know that this can be a fetish, I always though it was exciting. You need a predisposition for a fetish, not the knowledge that it exists.

Tickling is someone that everybody does or witnesses sooner or later, and then they will know if they are into it or not. I doubt that anybody on here never found tickling erotic and then went on the internet, saw this forum and went like "Wow, this is hot".

 

[natural tickler]

I wouldn't mind, because it can help a lot of people come out with their fetish, instead out of hiding and being secretive about it. They can be free to express their love of their fetish in public and not be ashamed about it

 

[rhiannon]

Why can't you express your love of your fetish now? I have no problems at all to talk about it to those people I talk to about sex. And why would I tell people who I don't talk to about sex about it? It's none of their business!

 

[P[a]pi]

If that happened I would think it's cool and I would enjoy it.

Thought about it for a sec and I have to clarify. If you mean bondage and tickling together when you say tickling fetish, then what I stated above. If you mean just tickling by it self when you say tickling fetish, I wouldn't care much.

The same goes for bondage. As people have said, bondage is now mainstream, but with no tickling added to it, I don't care much.

 

[MikeMenace]

No, thank you. Foot fetish just went mainstream in my country thanks to social media and its presence in the mainstream is the cringiest thing I ever witnessed.

 

[Comfort Eagle]

obligatory "15 year old thread bump" but

I genuinely don't understand what people mean by a "mainstreamed fetish". Like people just talk about getting their asscheeks spanked raw in every day conversation? Like what the hell is the ideal scenario there? Dakota Johnson just blurts out she bought a set of stocks on Jimmy Fallon one evening? How does that discussion even come up organically?