Kids and tickling

[tickledgirls]

It's sad that we live in a culture where this is even a question worth asking. He's a kid being playful. If the person receiving the tickling is fine with it, it SHOULD be a non-issue. The pathetic fact that rampant pedo-fear has transformed our society into a place where innocent acts like tickling are causes for litigation is downright depressing.

I hope that, if it truly makes you feel self-conscious, he stops. If you aren't truly uncomfortable with it, then I hope he continues and you do subtly encourage him to express himself in whatever way he feels is appropriate. There are some things that kids obviously shouldn't do and should be discouraged from even considering, but tickling (and innocent touches in general) is not one of them. If it starts happening to teachers on a wider scale, maybe the culture will wise-up to it's harmful paranoia.

This! My cub-scouts tend to tickle me a fair bit if they can get the chance, they're a fairly playful bunch. The parents don't mind, they encourage me to get them back if their watchful eyes are there too occasionally. But I don't understand why it has to be such a problem. Touch is one of the five senses, and society has basically dictated that we cut of one of these senses....

 

[Rachel_L]

I'm sorry I can't quite get my head around this. What is your issue exactly? Yes we are a tickling site which is supposed to be about adults tickling, but that doesn't mean she can't come here and ask advice to do about a kid that keeps tickling her. Maybe she thought that we might have had experience with that. It's not like she was talking about tickling the kid in some sexual way... she was just asking peoples opinion about the kid tickling her and what to do on a tickling site. You were really rude. And a nine year old just had a baby in mexico, and if a 9 year old can have a kid, then sure a 7 year old can have a crush on someone...

If you think I'm being rude? You have seen nothing yet if I am to fight the corner of a child (If indeed this is a true case scenario and not a troll)..I ask this question of the original poster as to why she hasn't sought the guidance of peers in her LEA? NOT of you....I ask this because,A) I'm also in the UK and B) because I happen to know a more than a little about teacher training..Let me ask you this..If your child's behaviour was an issue with a teacher for this or a similar reason would you want it dealt with in a professional manner by trained professional individuals or judgemental people like you on a fetish site? I would suggest that in UK law that even sharing such information and in such a place is in beach of the Children Act 2004. Disappointing really that so many people fail to see the nature of this post.

 

[Rachel_L]

And a nine year old just had a baby in mexico, and if a 9 year old can have a kid, then sure a 7 year old can have a crush on someone...[/B][/QUOTE

Oh and that bit..Is that really your justification? Shame on you..YOU vile excuse for life.

 

[rhiannon]

Oh and that bit..Is that really your justification?

I don't think you're getting the point here.

 

[tcle1]

It's really sad how the world is now. Tickling can just be a way of bonding between two people, as has been brought out, and be as innocent as a hug or playfighting etc. But obviously we all view it a little differently also. And i'm not having a go at anyone on here...it is true that you have to cover yourself to avoid any allegations etc. But it's just so sad that you HAVE to cover your back on something so innocent and playful. It's like it's gone from one extreme to the other. It used to be so relaxing and you didnt have to be on edge all the time for fear that someone might sue you for total innocent, harmless and playful behaviour (with children or even just with friends). Sadly, people used to take advantage of that and children would be sexually abused. But now it's like the other extreme where people are fearful that some1 could take the simplest, most innocent/playful, none ill intentional like poke or nudge the wrong way and make a huge issue of it and even sue you or something.

Dont get me wrong, if it's making you uncomfortable then by all means stop it. But I fear that part of why it's making you uncomfortable is because you're afraid of how people will see it and worst case scenario you could lose your job just because somebody THOUGHT you were doing something wrong. And we are just a touchy/feely race (erm yeah I know how that may sound but I hope you know what I mean lol. Im not the best at expressing myself properly :s haha) and it's just a shame with all these lawsuits and now people just assume the worst and assume people have bad intentions :/. Anyway, sorry about that little rant sort of thing..it's just a little saddening and kind of depressing lol.

 

[ISUmark]

I think you have handled it quite well and appropriately. Especially as a teacher you have to tread very lightly. Myself, along with many others im sure, can distinguish playfully tickling a child or being tickled by a child such as a niece or nephew, from erotic tickling, but its definitely a different situation in ANY workplace, let alone a school. Very nice job handling it, and I dont think its a bad thing that you asked for advice here. We are all people too, not just mindless tickle perverts looking for our next fix.

 

[maniactickler]

Its completely normal. and the good part is, hes a future ticklephile.

 

[shiftdown]

Deadly, Mitchell and Edward are all right. Overall this kind of practice should be stopped, due to the fact he will start to wonder about other things. Let alone, starting to approach other things with you, with the age difference, let alone being a teacher should stop this, don't be suprised if he try's to continue it in a rather sneaky way. If I where you I wouldn't raise a hand around him or "mess around" with your shoes around him, overall I can all but guarantee that he will try and continue in anyway he can, .....men are like that, believe me, I know ;-)

 

[NonConTickler]

I don't know if you thought of this, but if you were to not have any reaction to the tickling he would most likely figure you weren't ticklish and give up.

 

[Caligula66]

When I was 5yo, I had an immense crush on my Aunt's best friend, I thought I was in love. She was drop dead gorgeous. Now I didn't tickle her (I guess I'm weird, I've never had the urge to tickle girls though I find them attractive, yet I'm a major "ler" when it comes to guys).
So we cuddled I little, I was too young to know about anything naughty, yet alone do it.
But I loved to create trouble between her and her fiancé when she got engaged. I was really mean to him until he would be mean to me back and I made sure he did that in front of her and she would get mad at him and say "is this how you'll treat our kids" then she'd run off to comfort me.

My point is yes, young boys, do indeed develop crushes on adult women (I can't speak for young girls) and it's totally normal and innocent.
What he's doing is totally innocent and you can even tickle him back, yet you should discuss with him how this type of behavior can be taken the wrong way.

Now if it makes you uncomfortable, you should do what one of my high school girlfriends did when a 7yo boy she babysat used to pinch her butt. She'd kindly sit him down and explain that this was innappropriate behavior that could get him into a lot of trouble.
Every time he'd pinch her, she'd repeat the conversation with more emphasis until he stopped.

When it comes to adults working with kids, I'd hate to see a world where there could be no touching between them because people are too afraid of lawsuits and what others would perceive.
Granted an adult should never touch a child, unles saybthey're comforting them with a hug.
But if the child initiates an innocent tickle or kiss on the cheek it's no big deal.
When I had tobsay goodbye to my favorite teacher in H.S., we embraced tightly and I gave her a kiss on the check goodbye.
I'd hate to see a world that's so puritanical that she'd be forced to deny me that physical closure that we both needed.

 

[Caligula66]

Oops! Double post, my mistake.

 

[Caligula66]

If you think I'm being rude? You have seen nothing yet if I am to fight the corner of a child (If indeed this is a true case scenario and not a troll)..I ask this question of the original poster as to why she hasn't sought the guidance of peers in her LEA? NOT of you....I ask this because,A) I'm also in the UK and B) because I happen to know a more than a little about teacher training..Let me ask you this..If your child's behaviour was an issue with a teacher for this or a similar reason would you want it dealt with in a professional manner by trained professional individuals or judgemental people like you on a fetish site? I would suggest that in UK law that even sharing such information and in such a place is in beach of the Children Act 2004. Disappointing really that so many people fail to see the nature of this post.

Rachel, you are being rude.
What on earth would make you think she's trolling, she genuinely seems distressed and in need of advice.
I believe the reason she's asking for advice here instead of asking her peers is because she wants advice in light of her fetish.
I don't know UK law, but if the Children's act of 2004 truly does prohibit her sharing this information, than it's just another example of how sad it is that this is becoming a world where a teacher can't even hug a child to comfort him/her.
I am glad I don't work with children and I would be horrified if I had a child and they had to work with a #%^* like you.

YOU are the judgmental person here.

 

[C.A.B.]

In my opinion, you only find it weird behaviour because you are into tickling as a fetish already. That being said, if it bothers you in your professional work environment, you have every right to ask him to cut it out. Associating tickling and fetishism with a seven year old is not a good thing, even though it is being initiated by him, I think you are doing the right thing by shutting it down

^ This.

 

[Huth]

children across the globe are being victims of molestation, so I think stringent global laweas are required under the ssurveillance of UNESCO and UNICEF

 

[desperado_flare]

children across the globe are being victims of molestation, so I think stringent global laweas are required under the ssurveillance of UNESCO and UNICEF

Sure, anyone who gets off on touching children's breasts, butts or genitals should face severe punishment. I doubt any rational person would argue against that.

But tickling is tickling. Kids are already taught to be way too suspicious of the 99% of adults that have no sexual interests in them because of the 1% that actually mean them harm. This leads people to become paranoid and socially awkward throughout their lives, which is arguably just as damaging as being a victim of one of these creeps.