Long term Friendship ended need advice please!

[porcelaindoll2]

So first let me try to explain. There is this gay guy who I have known for seven years. We both went to the same art school in high school and we now currently go to the same college of music. I always thought we were best friends. It was always the two of us together and we would be bff. I did always feel he was using me. Sadly all through out freshman and sophomore year of college we would go out to eat places and I would always pay for him. I had no car and I only did it because he drove me everywhere. Even home which was four hours away. My parents understood why I did that. They were not that mad. Sadly I feel he was only my friend because I was his sugar mama. He even called me that once. We had alot of conflicts during our friendship. One of the main conflicts happened sophomore year. I asked him about moving into an apartment together. He would just shrug and say maybe. His first excuses were you have no car and the other roommate doesn't want to room with you. I kept asking him and then the real truth came out he said I just don't want to room with you at all we would drive each other crazy. That really hurt. Then the week I got back from spring break he was desperately looking for a roommate. He had the nerve to ask me after he said I never want to room with you! I tried to get him to explain and he really couldn't say much. I was great at asking questions that left him speechless or saying idk. Well around the end of this year I found out the third roommate wasn't coming back. Was it bad of me to feel after the way he treated me sophomore year that I would be rooming there? I kept asking him about it and he kept saying we wouldn't get along. Well during the winter of this year we had a huge blizzard and I stayed over at his apartment for eight days we got along great! I asked to room with him again because I proved rooming together would work. He told me to ask the second roommate who was coming back to see what she said about me staying there. She was in Ireland studying aboard and said no to me being there. I was upset, but I understood she was stuck in Ireland and would have had no where to go. He was on the hunt for a third roommate. He finally found one he liked a transfer from New York. He wanted me to get to know her, si we started hanging out. I wasn't really a fan of her because she was horny and she said she drank once a week. My friend would complain about my drinking because I got really depressed and used it to relax, but her drinking was ok because it was for social reasons!? All three of us went out to celebrate his 21st she got more drunk than him! I was the DD. Well the next week my guy friend told me to ask for her help to make me gain confidence. She was literally telling me my facebook was all wrong and needed to be fix! I was an angry unhappy person, so of course the pictures and info would be sad and angry! I am alot happier now! I told my best friend I thought she was being harsh. We had been friends for 7 years! He just dropped me and I am hurting so much! He said I needed to move on and make other friends. I might have been depending on him too much, but I thought we were that close and he enjoyed my company. He had to end it right before finals. He wouldn't even talk to me face to face. He got the new third roommate to text me to end it. Then I tried to talk to him and she turned into his lawyer and texted everything for him. Well after he dropped me as a friend she still wanted to help me, but I dumped her. She wasn't really helping that much anyway and I go to a counselor! They really know how to help people not MT Majors! Could you give me some advice? I am really hurting. I'm trying to realize he was an ass, but forgetting about him is not that easy. I also feel he was friends with me in college because he pitied me.

 

[porcelaindoll2]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=J6G-pCykYl4 My life feels like this song now. I will never be able to really listening to it without crying. I know it is about a romantic relationship, but it still works.

 

[Fire_Sprite]

Meh, sometimes friendships fail. It sounds like he was never a very accommodating friend, but trying desperately to convince yourself he's entirely in the wrong won't do you any good in the long run. Just move on without him.

 

[Saeria]

Losing a close friend you value for whatever reason is always hard. Sometimes you just plain connect with a person in a way completely different from the way you connect with anyone else in the world. Losing that does kinda feel worse than breaking off a romantic relationship. You find yourself wishing you could call up that friend and just pour your heart out, because this person just plain gets you, but they're not there anymore. Maybe it's something like that.
It gets better in time. Just keep your head up, dollface. Though you may not ever find someone you connect with exactly that same way, there's literally thousands of ways to be friends and no doubt in time you'll have another good friend you can call up and connect with, even on those days you're really missing your old friend.