More tickling at work (kind of)

[LittleMissT]

I foolishly put my tickling fetish on Okcupid. I thought I would meet interesting men with the same fetish that way. I was wrong.

Anyways, someone who works in my office but not directly with me saw my profile, read through it all and then was compelled to message me about the fact that he read through my whole profile and found it fascinating.

So since then I've taken my tickling fetish secret off the site but can't help but think about the fact that this certain coworker knows my deepest darkest secret. I find myself alone with him in the kitchen and can't help but look down and the floor when he asks me how I am. He's very friendly and polite but I can't move past the fact that he knows more about me than most of the people in my life.

Anyways, I found out a couple days ago that he will be working on the same show as me (I work in kids animation). This means that I will be working with him closely on a day to day basis. This is my nightmare. I can't even look into his eyes on a casual basis and now I will have to talk to him daily. I am freaking out.

I'm just writing this out into the tickling universe because I feel like you guys are the only people whole will understand. Don't feel obligated to respond but if you have any advice for me, please feel free to share it.

 

[Jk1974]

Sounds like to me that he may have a tickling fetish also? Otherwise what would he be doing on that site searching for tickling? Or perhaps he just has a crush on you? Either way it doesn't sound too threatening to me.

 

[kcantankerous]

Hello,

When I had an account, I put that my match "must be ticklish".

Thanks,

K

 

[mealzonwheels]

I foolishly put my tickling fetish on Okcupid. I thought I would meet interesting men with the same fetish that way. I was wrong.

Anyways, someone who works in my office but not directly with me saw my profile, read through it all and then was compelled to message me about the fact that he read through my whole profile and found it fascinating.

So since then I've taken my tickling fetish secret off the site but can't help but think about the fact that this certain coworker knows my deepest darkest secret. I find myself alone with him in the kitchen and can't help but look down and the floor when he asks me how I am. He's very friendly and polite but I can't move past the fact that he knows more about me than most of the people in my life.

Anyways, I found out a couple days ago that he will be working on the same show as me (I work in kids animation). This means that I will be working with him closely on a day to day basis. This is my nightmare. I can't even look into his eyes on a casual basis and now I will have to talk to him daily. I am freaking out.

I'm just writing this out into the tickling universe because I feel like you guys are the only people whole will understand. Don't feel obligated to respond but if you have any advice for me, please feel free to share it.

Didn't you foresee a coworker coming across your profile?

Theoretically what would your choice be if he blackmails you into either going out with him (he already expressed that he is intrigued by your profile), or even tying you up and tickling you?

Would you succumb or wouldn't care about your tickling fetish being out in the open to all your office

 

[TheTickleMonster]

maybe you should message him on the site.. does he even know it was you? Did he recognize you.. if not then it doesn't matter, but if he does, maybe you should message him tell him that there's some personal stuff on your profile that you don't want getting out or whatever... and that's cool that you work in kids animation.. i'd love to work with you.

 

[SmashTV]

I'd not mention it in front of him, and see if he raises it. If he doesn't, then the chances are that he'd also not want his secret to be revealed. After all, he was the one trawling the site, not you. The fact he finds it 'fascinating' suggests that he's got some sort of interest in it himself. As a result, he might not want it exposed either.

I totally understand where you're coming from, though; I'd be mortified myself if my co-workers (or indeed my friends) found out about my tickling fetish. Thank God for the TMF!

Best of luck with everything.

Cheers, everybody,
SmashTV

 

[kcantankerous]

Hello,

Easy, not everyone thinks it is a big deal. We blow it up in our own heads a lot of times. Still, I can see why MissT is a bit concerned. I think it has more to do with T than it does him. Hell, he probably forgot about it. Just let the scenario play out is all that can happen.

Thanks,

K

 

[FFT32]

Unless you left some details out, it seems as if the coworker thus far has only read about your tickle fetish. He continues to be polite and "his normal self" based on what you wrote. He most likely has a crush on you and is possibly into or interested in tickling.

I say you do what he is doing and act normal and as if he knows nothing about your tickle interests. If this guy is into you he will have to reveal it eventually. Otherwise let it fade.

 

[Sandisk444]

I'm a little confused, did you not try to inquire further about who this person was?

I realize it feels like a huge deal but it might not be as long as the person doesn't try to make things difficult for you. If it is the guy you're suspecting, he doesn't seem to really care all that much about it and might genuinely think it's interesting. I don't really think enjoying tickling is all that embarrassing and have been told that by quite a few people outside of the fetish (vanilla and not). Feeling exposed is totally normal but I don't think it's going to do you any good to freak out about it.

If you find out who it actually is and you feel like it would help, pull them aside and explain the situation and how it makes you feel. Clearing the air will make it feel less daunting if the person isn't a dickhead.

 

[robmic]

The one thing I haven't seen mentioned, or have missed, is if you are not interested in him, or just embarrassed in the fact he knows about your interest in tickling.

 

[nomercyystudios]

i sent you an inbox message i have been where you are now, i hope the advice i wrote you helps, i have been in your exact same position

 

[HappyTriangle]

Well I'd say just confront him directly. He doesn't seem like a bad guy, and he isn't going around telling people or being a jerk about it. Just tell him that what you put on your profile was very personal and that you don't feel comfortable having anybody else know.

Who knows? Maybe you could make a friendship or relationship out of the deal!

And even if her does a 180 starts being a jerk and tells everybody, who cares? Out of all the fetishes in the world, tickling is rather tame.

 

[maniactickler]

Sounds like to me that he may have a tickling fetish also? Otherwise what would he be doing on that site searching for tickling? Or perhaps he just has a crush on you? Either way it doesn't sound too threatening to me.

Its not a tickling site though. I predict he will tickle you at some point. embrace it.

 

[EmbraceSerenity]

I met my boyfriend on OK Cupid. I wrote about the tickling thing on there, and it gave us scope to talk about it and discuss it and now its a part of our relationship. So if you like him too, I don't think its a big deal. Most guys find it cute, so at the very least, he'd be like oh that's cute.

 

[bestmed]

Kids animation, that sounds awesome. Voice overs would be my dream job.

It sounds like, if he doesn't share the fetish, at least he doesn't look down at you. If you need to just ask if he thinks less of you for it. At least you'll know if there's any reason to feel embarrassed.

 

[LittleMissT]

Thank you all for your advice. I'm not interested in him. I think I just need to get over my embarrassment. I should have known a co-worker would see it but usually out of curtesy when you see a coworker on a site like that you don't click on them... For fear of awkwardness, right??? Maybe it's just me!

He messaged me about my profile and pointed out key things he read. But he never mentioned the fetish. I responded with a friendly message back. And that was the end of it. I just can't help but think about it as soon as I see him in the office. I know I'm making a mountain out of a mole hill. I know. I just wish he didn't know and I could go back to not caring about it anymore.

Anyways, thanks again, I'm sure I'll get over it eventually.

 

[magic fingers]

I'd not mention it in front of him, and see if he raises it. If he doesn't, then the chances are that he'd also not want his secret to be revealed. After all, he was the one trawling the site, not you. The fact he finds it 'fascinating' suggests that he's got some sort of interest in it himself. As a result, he might not want it exposed either.

I totally understand where you're coming from, though; I'd be mortified myself if my co-workers (or indeed my friends) found out about my tickling fetish. Thank God for the TMF!

Best of luck with everything.

Cheers, everybody,
SmashTV

That's great advice. Don't bring up tickling, keep things professional at work. If he mentions it, just remember he didn't ridicule or insult you. If anything he sounded interested. Do you feel comfortable around this partucular co-worker? He sounds like a decent guy.

 

[tklfeather10]

I think if anything adverse was going to happen it would have happened by now, a lot of people on these sort of sites would rather not have their coworkers aware that they were signed up to it, nothing wrong with it, so he may be feeling a slight unease, he does seem a ok type of guy, a live and let live person, not all people have a adverse opinion about our fetish,i understand it more humiliating for a female in some respects, the office gossip aspect, but just imagine a manly guy with a tkl fetish and it becomes public knowledge thats a real red face job, don't worry, it may be worth getting to know him, as a friend.

 

[magic fingers]

Thank you all for your advice. I'm not interested in him. I think I just need to get over my embarrassment. I should have known a co-worker would see it but usually out of curtesy when you see a coworker on a site like that you don't click on them... For fear of awkwardness, right??? Maybe it's just me!

He messaged me about my profile and pointed out key things he read. But he never mentioned the fetish. I responded with a friendly message back. And that was the end of it. I just can't help but think about it as soon as I see him in the office. I know I'm making a mountain out of a mole hill. I know. I just wish he didn't know and I could go back to not caring about it anymore.

Anyways, thanks again, I'm sure I'll get over it eventually.

I'll bet you he's already forgotten. We're all so "ashamed" of our fetish, but most vanilla's don't think tickling is all that weird compared to other kinks. The internet has kind of densensitized the general population to what was once considered "deviant" behavior.

 

[LittleMissT]

Okay, for those who are invested in my made up dilemma.... 'he who shall remain nameless' came and talked to me today. About his vacation days. He was very nice and friendly. Needless to say, I lived through the experience.

That is all for now, but I will continue to give you updates as my crisis continues to unravel.

 

[magic fingers]

Okay, for those who are invested in my made up dilemma.... 'he who shall remain nameless' came and talked to me today. About his vacation days. He was very nice and friendly. Needless to say, I lived through the experience.

That is all for now, but I will continue to give you updates as my crisis continues to unravel.

I know you said you're not attracted to him, but it sounds like you got a new friend out of this experience.

 

[Jk1974]

In my opinion it sounds like your friend.. Coworker was looking 4 tickling.. It's been my experience that you don't find what you're not looking for.. Keep that in mind.. I would not be ashamed.. Because he was obviously searching tickling profiles.. Highly doubt yours just popped out at random.. Embrace it look forward to the stories JK 1974

 

[Phineas]

In my opinion it sounds like your friend.. Coworker was looking 4 tickling.. It's been my experience that you don't find what you're not looking for.. Keep that in mind.. I would not be ashamed.. Because he was obviously searching tickling profiles.. Highly doubt yours just popped out at random.. Embrace it look forward to the stories JK 1974

Sorry dude, but you're not even close.

The OP said her coworker found her on OKCupid. OKCupid's matching algorithm shows you people local to you who score highly based on the answers you give to OKC's various profile/match questions, most of which are submitted by other users. I've personally answered hundreds of them over the years, and not a single one of them has ever dealt with a tickling fetish. (On the other hand, I've been asked sixty-two different ways if I'm cool with someone who smokes weed.)

The odds that her profile popped up simply due to being nearby are infinitely higher than due to him searching for tickling. Hell, I don't even think OKC's keyword searches even work anymore.

I've had OKC try to match me with friends, coworkers (both current and former) and exes, all without me even so much as looking at Quickmatch.