mch5
TMF Regular
- Joined
- Mar 9, 2012
- Messages
- 272
- Points
- 18
Disclaimer (for those who love to jump to the wrong conclusion just to be able to attack and insult)
I'm not a pedophile, not into violence, rape, or any kind of sexual abuse,
other than the consensual/acted tickling fetish related.
In fact, I'm disgusted and unforgiving to any abuser.
I consider sex as the top pure and sacred concept form of joy and pleasure,
So I find it insulting whenever it is used as an abuse!
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Now, the question is:
What if the thing you desire most, is considered unacceptable? Inconceivable even?
What do I want?
I want to see someone like me (but of the other sex) being tickled tortured.
You may ask, what is so wrong with that... well, let me tell you;
I am a person with a severe disability (congenital myopathy). In fact, it's so severe that it's not just being in a wheelchair and hardly able to move, but I am also connected to a ventilation machine, which breathes for me by pushing air into my lunges through a hole in my neck (Tracheostomy).
Some days I almost hope I was just paralyzed (so maybe my sex drive would be lower due to physical inability), but that is not the case. I can feel my body, it's just infinitely "heavy". This is like if a would fork weight 5kg, so lifting your own arm would be like lifting a fridge
And now, think about how the notion of sex, let alone a fetish, with someone like me... in our culture... ?
So, yes, some people find it as unacceptable as child pornography or rape!
So, my dark fantasy is so bad...?
To watch a woman in/close-to my condition, being tickled.
I tried to write a story about my fantasy.
A woman with my condition (with the stereotype of depression), submitting herself to the secret organization that tickles torture. Falsely thinking it would kill her.
But, as I was writing the story, reaching the part she is finally being tickled tortured, I used my own experience and knowledge to describe it.
And I stopped because this story won't "work" for anyone but me, because... it's too different...
Even laughter is different, because of the ventilation machine. Imagine yourself laughing, while still breathing... weird, isn't it?
Vocalization would be (is, as I know from myself) longer and less sectioned: Instead of ahahah/hehe, more like continues Aaaaaah with an almost cut ending.
I bet while reading this, it sounds quite creepy... if laughter at all.
And that's not the only weird aspect of it.
So how would you handle a desire so strong, yet so impossible to accept by your surroundings?
How can you fulfill a fantasy that might be shared by no one?
btw, a fun note (if, anyone interested at all) :
People with Tracheostomy, sometimes have an internal balloon that when blown, the air cannot escape. That means better breathing but also the air can't reach the vocal cords at all.
So, laughter, that case would be totally silent! again, can you imagine how it is to be laughing uncontrollably and still breathing in normal rhythm?
I'm curious for your thoughts.
I'm not a pedophile, not into violence, rape, or any kind of sexual abuse,
other than the consensual/acted tickling fetish related.
In fact, I'm disgusted and unforgiving to any abuser.
I consider sex as the top pure and sacred concept form of joy and pleasure,
So I find it insulting whenever it is used as an abuse!
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Now, the question is:
What if the thing you desire most, is considered unacceptable? Inconceivable even?
What do I want?
I want to see someone like me (but of the other sex) being tickled tortured.
You may ask, what is so wrong with that... well, let me tell you;
I am a person with a severe disability (congenital myopathy). In fact, it's so severe that it's not just being in a wheelchair and hardly able to move, but I am also connected to a ventilation machine, which breathes for me by pushing air into my lunges through a hole in my neck (Tracheostomy).
Some days I almost hope I was just paralyzed (so maybe my sex drive would be lower due to physical inability), but that is not the case. I can feel my body, it's just infinitely "heavy". This is like if a would fork weight 5kg, so lifting your own arm would be like lifting a fridge
And now, think about how the notion of sex, let alone a fetish, with someone like me... in our culture... ?
So, yes, some people find it as unacceptable as child pornography or rape!
So, my dark fantasy is so bad...?
To watch a woman in/close-to my condition, being tickled.
I tried to write a story about my fantasy.
A woman with my condition (with the stereotype of depression), submitting herself to the secret organization that tickles torture. Falsely thinking it would kill her.
But, as I was writing the story, reaching the part she is finally being tickled tortured, I used my own experience and knowledge to describe it.
And I stopped because this story won't "work" for anyone but me, because... it's too different...
Even laughter is different, because of the ventilation machine. Imagine yourself laughing, while still breathing... weird, isn't it?
Vocalization would be (is, as I know from myself) longer and less sectioned: Instead of ahahah/hehe, more like continues Aaaaaah with an almost cut ending.
I bet while reading this, it sounds quite creepy... if laughter at all.
And that's not the only weird aspect of it.
So how would you handle a desire so strong, yet so impossible to accept by your surroundings?
How can you fulfill a fantasy that might be shared by no one?
btw, a fun note (if, anyone interested at all) :
People with Tracheostomy, sometimes have an internal balloon that when blown, the air cannot escape. That means better breathing but also the air can't reach the vocal cords at all.
So, laughter, that case would be totally silent! again, can you imagine how it is to be laughing uncontrollably and still breathing in normal rhythm?
I'm curious for your thoughts.