Next stop... Jail

[Adam]

Just a quick update for anyone that remembers. Last year, I posted about a friend of mine who got himself into trouble for DUI. Well, after 3 separate trips to the courthouse for various reasons, it has been decided that he will be spending this weekend in jail. Frankly, though this isn't the most pleasant outcome, we both realize that he got off pretty easy. Even better for him, he'll be on unsupervised probation. 18 months worth, but at least he won't have to visit with a P.O. every week. I believe he said that the jail time won't go on his permanent record, either.

I find myself a tad conflicted. Though this dude is my best friend and had been for years, he clearly needed to get caught for his drinking and driving issues. It wasn't the first time he'd done it. Just the first time he got caught. I'd never admit this to him, but I find myself to be a bit on the happy side that he'll be experiencing prison for the 3 days. I figure if this doesn't teach him not to get behind the wheel of a car after having too much to drink, nothing will. All opinions welcome. If you want to be harsh, go right ahead. I'll likely agree with you.

 

[chicago]

Having had two high school friends die within a year of graduation because of drunk driving, I can say that illegal actions involved with alcohol (i.e. underage drinking, drinking and driving, giving alcohol to a minor, etc) are not punished harshly enough.

 

[Bugman]

I hope this a wakeup call for your friend.It's a good thing he got nailed before he hurt or killed someone.And that nice little increase on his car insurance should also serve as a handy reminder.

 

[Adam]

Having had two high school friends die within a year of graduation because of drunk driving, I can say that illegal actions involved with alcohol (i.e. underage drinking, drinking and driving, giving alcohol to a minor, etc) are not punished harshly enough.

Know what's ironic? At least in the case of the state of Maryland, the penalty that he is receiving is actually more harsh than it has been in the past. Most times the court system would settle for PBJ, but now they're actually exploring jail time for first time offenders. Of course, it seems to depend on which part of Maryland you're in as well. He was caught just outside of Pennsylvania, coming back into Maryland.

I am sorry about your friends, too. That type of thing should never happen in the first place. I hope my pal realizes that his ridiculous actions could have potentially had a fatal outcome. If he ever does it again, my sympathy for him will be gone completely.

I hope this a wakeup call for your friend.It's a good thing he got nailed before he hurt or killed someone.And that nice little increase on his car insurance should also serve as a handy reminder.

Absolutely. Thankfully, he seems to realize this. He still struggles with drinking, but as long as he stays away from a vehicle while doing so, the drinking is something that can continuously be worked on with the proper treatment... which he is getting, by the way. As for the car insurance, let's just say that I'm glad I don't need to pay that bill.

 

[Bugman]

I believe he said that the jail time won't go on his permanent record, either.

It will go on his driving record i assume.I don't know what he does for a living,but he's pretty well screwed getting a job that involves driving a company vehicle.I've been driving commercial vehicles for 30 years,and no company i ever worked for would hire him.The insurance companies won't allow it.There might have been a time when they would,but not in the last fifteen years or so.

I do hope he gets things turned around.

 

[Adam]

It will go on his driving record i assume.I don't know what he does for a living,but he's pretty well screwed getting a job that involves driving a company vehicle.I've been driving commercial vehicles for 30 years,and no company i ever worked for would hire him.The insurance companies won't allow it.There might have been a time when they would,but not in the last fifteen years or so.

I do hope he gets things turned around.

Thanks, B-Man. Me too. He has gotten much better since that incident, but has fallen off the wagon a few times. About the driving record, yeah, I'm 99% sure that it will stay on there permanently. But to me, the jail time is the bigger issue. If that stays on his record, he'll have a rough time getting any employment, period.

 

[TklDuo-Ann]

Having lost a few friends to drunk drivers, I consider this to be overly lenient. Most "penalties" for drunk driving are. If the courts don't take this more seriously, neither will those who are stupid and selfish enough to do it.

If it were my choice, there would be mandatory penalties... a week in jail and 6 months suspended liscence for a first offense...a month in jail and revokation of liscence for a second offense...vehicular homicide if anyone is killed...etc.

I have zero tollerance for this.

 

[storm7400]

Thanks, B-Man. Me too. He has gotten much better since that incident, but has fallen off the wagon a few times. About the driving record, yeah, I'm 99% sure that it will stay on there permanently. But to me, the jail time is the bigger issue. If that stays on his record, he'll have a rough time getting any employment, period.

Actually the points drop in 3 years and after 3 years, as long as he as no further incidents drinking related, he is under no obligation to report it. That and after 3 years he can apply to have it expunged.

 

[Bugman]

If that stays on his record, he'll have a rough time getting any employment, period.

Depends on the job,and the company.I work,and have worked with people who have been in jail and prison.Some companies will hire him,some won't.It sure won't make things any easier on him,especially given the current state of the economy.

 

[tcklft]

As long as he doesn't drop his soap in the shower I'm sure he'll get through jail okay. I hope he get his act together.

 

[QBWeaver]

I hope he gets real about his drinking problem and takes the right steps to do something about it. He can't get sober on his own. He has to get help whether it's AA or an inhouse program. If he's still drinking he'll drive drunk again. He hasn't realized that he has a serious problem yet. I just hope he doesn't hurt anyone else if/when he gets back behind the wheel after having a few too many.

 

[Jumper13000]

I lost my fiance to a drunk driver!

Your friend is going to jail on the weekends!
Hopefully, it will be a sober period of "enlightenment"!

No one got crippled and no one died as a result of his drinking and driving!

Hopefully, he will "tighten up" and walk straight! As funny as this may sound-I pray he will do the right thing.

 

[Sanhael]

I believe your friend has walked away from his misdeeds with an inappropriately light slap on the wrist. That being said, the situation is what it is; nobody can say, in advance, that this assuredly won't turn his attitude about driving under the influence around. I hope it will.

Y'know what really disgusts me? Billboard advertisements for lawyers who specialize in beating DUI charges. Anybody who puts up an advertisement like that deserves to have an SUV crash into their living room.

 

[fordtech30]

Drinking never results in anything good. I've have friends that were into bad stuff and I actually had to drop them.

Sometimes you have to seperate yourself from people like that. You can only help those who want to help themselves. Sounds like your friend doesn't want much help.

 

[Adam]

Thank you everyone for your comments. I respect your opinions even if I don't totally agree with everything said. My pal does want help. I have seen him try, fall on his face and then try again. It's not for lack of effort. Most importantly, I do have to say to you, Jumper, that I am extremely sorry to hear of what happened to your fiancee. That breaks my heart. Nothing like that should ever happen to anyone. You have my sincerest condolences.

 

[Mister Scruff]

I'm a fan of people getting away with illegal things, but drink-driving is a big no-no. If he uses this as a springboard to get better it's all good, but if he's a recidivist he's probably going to need a kick up the arse from his mates to really sort himself out. Note, not friendly counsel and "just being there"; a proper rocket up the tailpipe so's he knows he's behaing like a twat and needs to change before he kills himself, or more importantly someone else.

 

[kis123]

I remember back in the day when the driving laws were much more lax that I used to get behind the wheel feeling little pain. I was lucky and didn't hurt anyone-still made it wrong, but again I was lucky.

I wouldn't do it now for anything! I know of too many people who have suffered at the irresponsibility of a drunk driver, including a TMF member who was hit shortly after his tour in Iraq. So he dodges roadside bombers overseas to come home to a DUI? Totally insane!

We had a case in OH about two years ago where two college students coming home for Christmas break were killed by a drunk driver on his 15th DUI! That's ridiculous! If they don't start cracking down on these folks, more people are going to be hurt or worse.

Adam, tell your friend that if he just has to drink, buy a bottle, take his arse home, and stay there!

 

[Adam]

Adam, tell your friend that if he just has to drink, buy a bottle, take his arse home, and stay there!

Oh, we've had that talk. Fortunately, staying put after drinking is exactly what he does now. Not that he should be drinking, but at least he's not behind the wheel. Under no circumstances does he want a second DUI. Thank you for the good thoughts, Kis.

 

[kis123]

Oh, we've had that talk. Fortunately, staying put after drinking is exactly what he does now. Not that he should be drinking, but at least he's not behind the wheel. Under no circumstances does he want a second DUI. Thank you for the good thoughts, Kis.

Well, once he coughs up about $2500 for the DUI and all that goes with that, and pays that bond for the next five years, that might be enough to straighten him out.

If he has a real alcohol problem (which it sounds like he does) he needs to seek out some help. Like QB said, he can't do this alone; AA is free if money's the issue. If he does nothing, he'll get worse and will eventually get behind the wheel again. I don't want to hear about him waking up in jail or handcuffed to a hospital bed told by the cops he hurt or killed someone during his drunken stupor. He'll never forgive himself and neither will the family(ies) he affects with it.

 

[Adam]

Well, once he coughs up about $2500 for the DUI and all that goes with that, and pays that bond for the next five years, that might be enough to straighten him out.

If he has a real alcohol problem (which it sounds like he does) he needs to seek out some help. Like QB said, he can't do this alone; AA is free if money's the issue. If he does nothing, he'll get worse and will eventually get behind the wheel again. I don't want to hear about him waking up in jail or handcuffed to a hospital bed told by the cops he hurt or killed someone during his drunken stupor. He'll never forgive himself and neither will the family(ies) he affects with it.

No doubt about it. He does attend AA and also goes to therapy, so he is trying. Struggle as he does, he doesn't drink half as much as he used to. So it's better. A big work in progress, but better.

 

[Bugman]

No doubt about it. He does attend AA and also goes to therapy, so he is trying. Struggle as he does, he doesn't drink half as much as he used to. So it's better. A big work in progress, but better.

It's not unusual for people to take two steps forward and one step back with things like that.The important thing methinks is he continue taking those two forward steps.

 

[kis123]

No doubt about it. He does attend AA and also goes to therapy, so he is trying. Struggle as he does, he doesn't drink half as much as he used to. So it's better. A big work in progress, but better.

As long as he stays in the battle, he has a chance of winning. I hope he gets stronger and better; addiction is a beast!

 

[xionking]

A weekend away in jail? Is this like one of those jail camp retreats I've heard so much about?

Breakfast, rock-climbing, soul-searching and shower activity. And at the end of it all, you get a badge!

-Xionking

 

[Adam]

A weekend away in jail? Is this like one of those jail camp retreats I've heard so much about?

Breakfast, rock-climbing, soul-searching and shower activity. And at the end of it all, you get a badge!

-Xionking

If I'm him, I'm keeping to myself in my cell for the entire weekend, if allowed. I don't know the degree of offenders they have at this facility, but I wouldn't be taking chances. If this means waiting until I get home to shower, I'd be doing that too.

 

[xionking]

If I'm him, I'm keeping to myself in my cell for the entire weekend, if allowed. I don't know the degree of offenders they have at this facility, but I wouldn't be taking chances. If this means waiting until I get home to shower, I'd be doing that too.

Dude, imagine...showering in jail. Potentially, your mate at one point may be thinking, "Well, this is the time...this is the moment...if I'm gonna be butt-violated ever in my life, it's gonna be now. Better make the room nice and steamy."

-Xionking