The Psychology of Tickling Girls and Touching their Feet; How a Fetish Develops

[Palendrome]

I have noticed alot of recurring nuances that occured in my life while trying to touch and tickle girls feet, and I have noticed these nuances when people post stories and the like on the TMF. In this post I would like to try to define these and see how they compare to others experiences.

1. When your first learn concretely what a fetish is and that you definately have one (I would Imagine this is probably about 12-14 for most), you get a thought in your head like "well crap, not of the movies give advice on how to get girls to let you touch their feet."

2. The first time a foot/tickle fetishist acts on their fetish is with somone in their family, like moms, aunts cousins, etc, not because of incest, but because of the comfort level inherent between family.

3. Until you have a serious girlfriend, your fetish is literally your closest-gaurded secret, with maybe your absolute best friend having knowlege.

4. When your in social situations and the words "tickling" "feet" or "fetish" come up in conversation, your lips are sealed with super glue.

5. When again you find yourself in social situations and a woman throws her feet in your lap or your face, you feign disgust, as to avoid the suspicions your peers may pose should you appear to enjoy the affair.

6. As you get older, your approach becomes more bold while still maintaining a level of apathy as to maintain the diversion of suspicion mentioned earlier (I remember the first time I actaully asked a girl if she wanted a foot massage.)

7. Once you fully hit your stride, you become a pro at manipulating (yes its a strong word, but I feel its the best choice) girls into completely surrendering their feet to your will

So how is that? Am I wrong? anything yall want to add or tell me I completely off base about?

 

[luvgirlsfeet]

summed me up pretty accurately, except for # 7 that part hasnt kicked in yet however My cousin Julie has allowed me to tickle her feet on more than one occasion ( yes its non sexual I cant stress that enough )

 

[Palendrome]

Ya Its not like you are attracted to your cousin, you just like to tickle her feet. Understandable.

 

[TickVix]

So what about those that enjoy being tickled, vs those that enjoy to tickle? Would the same theory apply?

 

[playfuldude]

If I were a psych professor id give you an A+. Obvioiusly not hard to see why i'm not. Not sure if manipulate is the right word however. Persuade, or coerce maybe. Ahh tomato, toma'to

 

[Palendrome]

thats a good point, I mean, Im like strictly a ler, maybe the lees can elaborate?

 

[bftk2005]

You have me pegged EXACTLY!!!!!!!! Wow that was very very good. Especially how I pretend to be disgusted by feet to keep my LOVE for them a secret. And yes O go to great lengths such as using an alias and driving up up 200 miles to keep my fetish a secret, sadly its like I live a double life. And I was about 14 when I discovered I loved tickling feet.

 

[BMoreTklr]

Good summary. I wouldn't say #7 has kicked in for me either though I've gotten miles better than I ever thought, and have experienced a lot more in the tickling realm than I dreamed I would achieve.

 

[Raytheon]

#3 #4 & #6 i can agree with but ive gone full circle through my 20s from keeping my thoughts hidden, to desperately wanting a relationship, to knowing people don't want me around, to being comfortable alone. The same can be said for tickling. I have grown to know now that im earning enough if i want to experience sex or my fetish i can go to an escort or mistress. The Psychology of being "normal" and fitting in to society can be a desperate endeavor for people who are ugly, or have problems etc and it can drive you to suicide. Its only when your staring at the knife on the table in front of you can you truly answer the question 'are you comfortable living outside of society'? ....

 

[Jagermeistered]

#3 #4 & #6 i can agree with but ive gone full circle through my 20s from keeping my thoughts hidden, to desperately wanting a relationship, to knowing people don't want me around, to being comfortable alone. The same can be said for tickling. I have grown to know now that im earning enough if i want to experience sex or my fetish i can go to an escort or mistress. The Psychology of being "normal" and fitting in to society can be a desperate endeavor for people who are ugly, or have problems etc and it can drive you to suicide. Its only when your staring at the knife on the table in front of you can you truly answer the question 'are you comfortable living outside of society'? ....

Do you think your 'ugly', or having a 'fetish' - is outside the realm of "society?"

 

[mopug]

I skipped steps 2, 4 AND 5. With step 7, I don't really need to manipulate anyone, as I'm pretty open about my fetishes. I wasn't open for the longest time, and then suddenly it just didn't matter to me whether people knew or not.

 

[Raytheon]

Do you think your 'ugly', or having a 'fetish' - is outside the realm of "society?"

British society, absolutely. The 24 hour drinking culture, the rise of the fake tanned Essex slut, and every girl wanting a 6ft+ bad boy to ride makes living in todays -20 something- society impossible if you don't fit in. Its the same with the British bdsm scene. As well as the described cultural issues im overlooked because of my 'soft/pathetic' tickling fetish. Clubs don't want girls laughing, they want spanking and pain.

So what are you left with? Well your left with a man who's nearly 30, no one wants to know, lives by himself and uses escorts to get his kicks. Being ugly and/or having a fetish (thats not good enough to be allowed in bdsm clubs) leaves you out of society ...from personal experience... yes.

 

[Libertine]

Being ugly and/or having a fetish (thats not good enough to be allowed in bdsm clubs) leaves you out of society ...from personal experience... yes.

If that's you in the sig pic, don't blame being ugly for your fetish failures, blame being a lousy salesman, and learn how to change THAT.

 

[Knizmo]

Wow-very perceptive sir!
Still workin on #7 myself these days..but I've definitely gotten to the point in my life where I figure, since this is part of who I am, I might as well embrace it. Eh, people will think what they think-so it's better to have tried.

 

[Mane'o]

One could easily replace tickling references with some other desire or passion or preference or fetish and have the same list. For any number of reasons our societies have established some public boundaries of behavior, many of those societal boundaries to keep us acting in a generally decent way to get through each day without major harm. But the human experience is so much broader than these arbitrary boundaries. Some things remain taboo from ages old customs that are no longer relevant to today. The boundaries for openness about intimate or sexual or simply types of physical interaction between people seem to have particularly narrow boundaries. And the more we suppress such desires the more they seek expression and can become obsessions that can consume us. Look at the cultures where women are expected to be covered completely, including faces, in public and the violence done to those who may not follow those strict rules of behavior. And so fear becomes a primary factor.
And that leads us back to the 7 items of the OP. The seven phases resonate with many in our community but many times I think we let the assumption of how might react to our "fetish" dictate our actions. Early on I had feelings similar to the first steps but determined not to liet my assumptions of others overtake my life. Until the advent of things like TMF, it was nigh impossible to find a place to share with like minded people. But i didn't hide my preference for ticklish bare feet (for me feminine feet) nor did i take out full page ads announcing it. Most people could care less. Most of the boogeymen were in my own head, assuming what others might think or say or do.
I let it be a part of me like my preference for certain foods or clothes or music or cars and on and on. I didn't hide it but I didn't broadcast it either. I let it flow. And for most people i encountered, the subject either never came up or did so in passing and then we went on to other things. But there were others, male and female, who responded to the knowledge that I enjoyed ticklish feet and it has given me a full life of experience and pleasure. So I skipped most of the intermediate steps listed by saying to myself, I'm not going to let fear of what others tink of me keep me from living the life I choose. I know it sounds easier said than done but neither impossible nor really that difficult once you open the door.

 

[C.A.B.]

The 'Why' of it all has always been of less concern than the 'When.'

 

[Jagermeistered]

Its the same with the British bdsm scene. As well as the described cultural issues im overlooked because of my 'soft/pathetic' tickling fetish. Clubs don't want girls laughing, they want spanking and pain.

-Raytheon

You must be the shy-type(outside of the mouse, keyboard, CPU/MAC, monitor device), or am I wrong? Are you sure all ladies want to be spanked and in pain, in the BDSM club? Observation is only fact, when it is backed by experiment... "Experience"-observation, is limited, due to the small data set; and, is due to cowardice. If you go to a club/gathering, you should look for a reason to love it(especially, when it comes to sexuality). If you want to blame society(in a sex-club); maybe, buying pleasure - is a end, not to sure. I am not against prostitution, or the escort... But, we should always seek, perpetual profit(love or free-lust)... And, not a ongoing expense!

 

[demure]

Holy shit this totally nailed it. I knew I had a thing for feet when I was about 5 or 6.
And, I do keep my lips sealed when "feet" or "fetish" come up.
I am pretty closeted about my foot fetish, but I have become somewhat open about it over the years.
Though, I didn't really experiment anything on my family, I just never thought it as ethical to experiment sexual acts on family members.

 

[Raytheon]

You must be the shy-type(outside of the mouse, keyboard, CPU/MAC, monitor device), or am I wrong? Are you sure all ladies want to be spanked and in pain, in the BDSM club? Observation is only fact, when it is backed by experiment... "Experience"-observation, is limited, due to the small data set; and, is due to cowardice. If you go to a club/gathering, you should look for a reason to love it(especially, when it comes to sexuality). If you want to blame society(in a sex-club); maybe, buying pleasure - is a end, not to sure. I am not against prostitution, or the escort... But, we should always seek, perpetual profit(love or free-lust)... And, not a ongoing expense!

Shy? rofl no im not shy. Ive never played World of Warcraft

A few years ago i made a distinct effort to head out and explore bdsm & fetish scene in my area. We have 4 clubs and 3 munches down this end of the country so after making a few profiles on sites i started getting to know people. I was befriended by a nice girl called Emily who said she was new to the scene too so we decided to explore it together. We started with 2 munches, the first Emily was was the only woman there and was hassled so much we left. The second munch once we arrived we were required to hand over car number plates, telephone numbers and addresses to attend which i was not happy about but Emily begged as we had driven a long way for it. We were ignored and shushed as if it were an actual meeting then everyone left after half an hour.

Bummed we decided to chalk these experiences to bad luck and try a club. The first club looked good and was considered a 'starter club' in the community.The club catered for bdsm and fetish members and It was happy to accept my £80 ($127) for two tickets. 4 days before the event i received an email telling me we were not to attend as our fetishes were not compatible with the clubs image and despite much complaint i didn't get a refund.

Gutted we tried a second club. This was the furthest away - a 600 mile round trip with a camping night stay and another £80 ($127) for tickets - Again the club promoted itself as a fetish friendly evening inside a bdsm club at a private mansion. This time we got there and Emily was quickly snapped up by a master for play times so she was happy. In the main scene room ironically a scene involving tickling was taking place and out of the blue i was asked to leave the room by the owner as "tickling was my fetish" and "it wasn't right that i should watch this". Without further explanation the rest of my evening was spent talking to people on the patio, not able to go back inside and an early night in the tent.

Disgruntled and getting disappointed with my experiences so far, 2 months had past and id spent a good £500 ($800) on travel and tickets. The third club billed itself as an extreme playhouse. Its image was hardcore sex and fetish. Learning from my previous mistake, before buying tickets i mailed the club to make sure my fetish was accepted. The response i received was that i was "permanently banned" from the club "for my own protection as tickling was too soft/pathetic for the nature of the club". Emily made her own way and had her first lesbian experience that night.

The forth and final club. By this point i didn't really want to go as i knew what to expect but Emily convinced me and even lined up a cute redhead for me to meet who'd expressed an interest in playing with me. £60 ($95) for tickets and we made it in without a problem. No, those didn't start until we were inside. The club was controlled by 3 middle aged men going from scene to scene touching and playing with whom they wanted. All other men had to remain by the bar throughout the evening. The cute redhead found me and we got chatting before two of the three controlling men came over and roughed me up for "talking to their property" before kicking me out. A horrible 5 hour wait for Emily to finish being played with sat in a dingy car park at 2am watching drug dealers made up my mind about the entire bdsm & fetish scene. I was done.

Later i emailed Emily to say i wanted out and she seemed to have made a great start in the scene. She emailed me back to say she was a pro-domme mistress who wasn't at all new to the scene and she wanted £3,000 ($4,800) for 7 days worth of financial slavery services i had apparently had built up each time we met. That night i deleted my accounts i had set up at the start months earlier. A fitting end to my experience.

... So to sum up for you buddy yeah i blame society for taking advantage. I blame the bdsm world for not being honest or open. Im comfortable paying a little more to enjoy tickling experiences which are otherwise unaccessible to me, not for lack of trying and ive moved on from the whole experience stronger and more robust to avoid getting burnt in the future.

cheers,
Ray

 

[Libertine]

The above post is fascinating.

I went to my first London fetish club 30 years ago in 1982 and since then have attended, and also dungeon-monitored at, countless clubs and events, mainly all over England but also in Germany, Austria, a few cities in Canada, and several in the United States. Never once have I had an experience the slightest bit like this, and never once have I paid so much for tickets.

There are certain rules in this forum regarding etiquette and I will not break them.

I can only say I have never read a 'contribution' which indicates with such clarity that the writer has infinite potential for a career in law or politics.

I have seen tickling in fetish clubs, I have DONE tickling in fetish clubs, and if anyone reading this is thinking of attending a fetish club, by all means do so, keeping in mind that as in vanilla clubbing you may or may not enjoy a particular establishment.

Shop around, and just be normally polite and respectful of your fellow patrons while you're there.

 

[Raytheon]

Just to clarify im not bashing the scene, just writing about my personal experience. Ticket price was for x2 tickets for both myself and Emily. By all means as the good dude above says go to clubs and have fun. Just if your thinking about going in the south west of england my advice would be you might want to check with the organizers first before you attend.