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What makes a good Ler?
- Thread starter jd58
- Start date
sweet.laughter
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- Sep 13, 2006
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Great question...
A good tickler is...
- respectful. They don't go overboard or push limits TOO far. They know what the ticklee is comfortable with, and is happy to work inside those parameters.
- attentive. A good tickler is always watching, listening and observing. They search for details on where the really good tickle spots are, the changing reactions of the ticklee, and they can deduce what those reactions mean. (when to push further, when to lighten up, etc.)
- creative. They keep the ticklee guessing, which in turn, makes them more sensitive. Whether this is unique spots or tools, or its just in terms of the teasing or conversation, their mind is active, which is the sexiest part of any person.
Those are the big 3 for me.
A good tickler is...
- respectful. They don't go overboard or push limits TOO far. They know what the ticklee is comfortable with, and is happy to work inside those parameters.
- attentive. A good tickler is always watching, listening and observing. They search for details on where the really good tickle spots are, the changing reactions of the ticklee, and they can deduce what those reactions mean. (when to push further, when to lighten up, etc.)
- creative. They keep the ticklee guessing, which in turn, makes them more sensitive. Whether this is unique spots or tools, or its just in terms of the teasing or conversation, their mind is active, which is the sexiest part of any person.
Those are the big 3 for me.
milagros317
Verified
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- Jan 12, 2002
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The key word is feedback.
A good ler is always watching the lee, seeing what technique works on which part of the body, and adjusts to what works on that lee.
A good ler is always watching the lee, seeing what technique works on which part of the body, and adjusts to what works on that lee.
daturaskiss
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- Jul 29, 2013
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#1. They have to care about me. It can't just be about them getting off and making it intense enough for THEM to get pleasure. It has to be about making me WANT it that intense - and they will get away with a lot more that way.
#2. They have to let me interact. Let me be a brat, and help me find ways to make this fun for you, instead of just coming in and taking what you need without talking to me. Let me feel like I am a great 'lee...give me the chance to BE that 'lee for you.
#3. They should be willing to adjust their approach depending on what is working on me. I understand if you're a foot person, and I'll give you some great giggles that way, but please explore me. You'll find I have some much more ticklish spots that you can exploit for devastating effects.
#4. Let me have a safeword, and if I use it, stop. Don't be angry towards me if you have to do so. Don't ignore and push me away. Hug me, talk to me, make sure I am ok. Be kind to me in this moment and I will push my own limits the next time.
#5. Make an effort to find new tickle spots - especially ones I haven't found myself. Teach me something new about my body.
#6. Remember my favourite spots. If I'm a good girl and give you a great time, show me by revisiting those lovely sweet spots that I adore.
#7. Change your technique often...keep the tricks that really work, but don't stop trying new things!
#2. They have to let me interact. Let me be a brat, and help me find ways to make this fun for you, instead of just coming in and taking what you need without talking to me. Let me feel like I am a great 'lee...give me the chance to BE that 'lee for you.
#3. They should be willing to adjust their approach depending on what is working on me. I understand if you're a foot person, and I'll give you some great giggles that way, but please explore me. You'll find I have some much more ticklish spots that you can exploit for devastating effects.
#4. Let me have a safeword, and if I use it, stop. Don't be angry towards me if you have to do so. Don't ignore and push me away. Hug me, talk to me, make sure I am ok. Be kind to me in this moment and I will push my own limits the next time.
#5. Make an effort to find new tickle spots - especially ones I haven't found myself. Teach me something new about my body.
#6. Remember my favourite spots. If I'm a good girl and give you a great time, show me by revisiting those lovely sweet spots that I adore.
#7. Change your technique often...keep the tricks that really work, but don't stop trying new things!
Brattysub5
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- Jul 3, 2013
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Well it's all been said!!! What they said ⬆
MistressMia
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- Apr 22, 2001
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Aside from being respectful...
Agile, adaptable and able to read the lee's responsiveness. Creativity and the element of surprise are a must for me as a lee in order to get the best response from me.
Agile, adaptable and able to read the lee's responsiveness. Creativity and the element of surprise are a must for me as a lee in order to get the best response from me.
In my opinion a good ler is a person that's respectful, down to earth and understands limits and boundaries. Nothing worse than telling a ler to stop or signal them with a safe word to do so and they don't. Not cool! Also a good ler is a person that understands the intricacy of tickling and how each area of the body responds differently to different levels of touch and pressure. Being poked and prodded in a painful manner really ruins the experience. Sorry just being honest.
UnsolvedMystery
TMF Poster
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- Feb 27, 2011
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- 116
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- 16
Sensitivity, imagination and respect.
Sensitivity because just digging your fingers in isn't the way to go and can be uncomfortable or even painful for a 'lee (I wasn't always the finely tuned tickling dynamo I am today...!) Sometimes a light stroke in the right place is all it takes. You also need sensitivity to the situation and the mood.
Imagination because you want to keep it interesting. Not just, "tickle, tickle on your feet!" I remember one girl I barely tickled her. I just whispered things in her ear but as I spoke I was gently blowing on her ear and neck until she was practically vibrating with anticipation in my lap. What you say can really help too. As a guy who likes to tickle girls, it's been my experience that if you devise a little role play scenario for your lee then it helps her get into it a bit more.
Respect. Does this one even need an explanation?
Sensitivity because just digging your fingers in isn't the way to go and can be uncomfortable or even painful for a 'lee (I wasn't always the finely tuned tickling dynamo I am today...!) Sometimes a light stroke in the right place is all it takes. You also need sensitivity to the situation and the mood.
Imagination because you want to keep it interesting. Not just, "tickle, tickle on your feet!" I remember one girl I barely tickled her. I just whispered things in her ear but as I spoke I was gently blowing on her ear and neck until she was practically vibrating with anticipation in my lap. What you say can really help too. As a guy who likes to tickle girls, it's been my experience that if you devise a little role play scenario for your lee then it helps her get into it a bit more.
Respect. Does this one even need an explanation?
JazzBouchard
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- Oct 15, 2006
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Someone who can conect with his/her ticklee. Not just to have techinques, but have the will to care about the other. Someone who can be trusted and be abble to give and take on any situation. Tickling is (i think) to make two people get closer; if that fails, something must be wrong with the tickler and or the ticklee.
Soda Bobinski
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Having your first name be 'Soda' & your last name be 'Bobinski'.
What makes someone good at sex? They are sensitive to the reactions of their partner and respond accordingly. A good ler knows what works and what doesn't work as the session goes along, even if they have to feel things out at first before they hit the jackpot. They know when to switch it up and come back and revisit sweet spots. They are creative and nimble with their fingers. They understand the amount of pressure and speed needed to be applied to certain areas in order to get the desired reaction.
Above all else, for me, the ler has to really derive immense amounts of pleasure and joy from tickling me and want it as much as I do.
Above all else, for me, the ler has to really derive immense amounts of pleasure and joy from tickling me and want it as much as I do.
realista_magica
TMF Expert
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This is a though question haha I've been tickled by some 'lers that are not that skilled I don't know... They fingers feel a little clumpsy. I guess its all about adding the right pressure on the right spots... Find out if your 'lee is more responsive to squeezing, nibbling, scratching, pokes or digging so you can work it out from there. Be sure to find aaaaall the ticklish spots you can and not spend a lot of time there! Keep your 'lee guessing!
Verbal teasing also helps a lot!
Verbal teasing also helps a lot!
nosforatiop
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- Mar 24, 2003
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Patience: exploring the body to find the best spots, repoire: it often falls on the dom to create one ( because we are the "agressors" in the situation so to speak). Respect: no-brainer, if you don't respect your partner you have and deserve no respect. Lastly endearingness: if you have a genuine love for the fetish, you have that same love for the person you practice it with. After all: it would be impossible to indulge without them.
clean_kitchen
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- Aug 14, 2002
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The best tickler is someone who *wants* to tickle me as much as I want to be tickled.
If they want to tickle me, then they will tend to do things like search out effective spots and techniques, because they want the reaction. If they're just doing it because you want them to, that's nice, but you usually get a half-hearted effort, and they get tired of it long before you do. A lot of times people don't like to tickle because they don't like to be tickled, and it's hard for them to understand that you truly like something they maybe truly don't. Then they feel bad for you or tolerate it with you instead of enjoying it with you.
But that's just me.
//CK
If they want to tickle me, then they will tend to do things like search out effective spots and techniques, because they want the reaction. If they're just doing it because you want them to, that's nice, but you usually get a half-hearted effort, and they get tired of it long before you do. A lot of times people don't like to tickle because they don't like to be tickled, and it's hard for them to understand that you truly like something they maybe truly don't. Then they feel bad for you or tolerate it with you instead of enjoying it with you.
But that's just me.
//CK
Bradhadair
TMF Expert
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- Jun 23, 2012
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All that has been said above. Most importantly, they enjoy and derive pleasure from what they are doing. I don't want to be tickled just because I asked you to do it. I want to be tickled because you love the way I giggle and squirm. For me, tickling is horribly sexual, so I must be able to connect on a sexual level with my ler. A slightly sadistic side helps for me. I want them to want to keep going even if I beg and plead for them to stop. Don't actually stop unless I safe word. BUT by the same token, know when I need a break to breathe for a bit. Switch it up... if you"re tickling the crap out of me and I start wheezing, stop tickling and suck my nipples or rub my clit until you can tell I caught my breath. Pay attention to my reactions. Mix light tickles with rough ones. Yeah... a lot lol.
