YOUR HELP IS NEEDED - or - Getting confident to change things - my take from Ted #1

[Erotickles]

This is, probably, common to all of us: working to change our lives for the better.

It has quite a few aspects, of course, but personally, for me, for the last couple of years - these efforts have been focused on supporting my relationship with myself and my sexuality. This is strongly tied to my tickling fetish - which sets my sexuality apart from that of most other people in general (and those that otherwise could be potential partners in particular).

Tell me, do you identify with this statement?

My narrative is such – that the current reality is fundamentally broken, and needs to be fixed.

In this current reality:

• Most of us are so deep in the closet, to the extent that finding one another is as difficult as it is.
• This leads to seclusion, to a lack of opportunity to experience and explore – for many of us.
• This, in turn, pushes many people towards a far from optimal relationship with this aspect of our sexuality: that of giving an excess weight to consuming “sexual goods” - be it video clips – or bought sex services.
• and in a soil where technicality rules – intimacy has a much harder time flourish...

In an ideal, fantastic, reality - every person who has an affiliation to the tickling fetish – would have a distinctive halo over their heads. Then, when we saw someone we liked and are attracted to – it would be for that – merely as one of many other things we were attracted to them for:

• they look at us in that way – that we know that they notice us too,
• they excite us, they impress us, they resonate with us, and they make us curious,
• they appeal to us physically,
• and oh – look at that halo – which promises that the intimacy with them will also be abundant, with wild, passionate, much desired, and exciting ticklish screams!

In an ideal world, experiencing and exploring out sexuality, our bodies, and touch – would be as easy as breathing.

Regretfully, this is currently( ) unattainable, however I act on the premise that we can drastically change, and even overturn this reality - if we only manage to learn to solve this problem as a community, rather than trying to solve it as individuals.

This is why I went on this endeavor, to push forward the concept of creating local communities of tickling enthusiasts (A part of which – is the Tickling Communities app as a platform).

And this is where the title of the post comes in:
I know that many of us are exhausted and frustrated with searching; It may seem that what is – is all that can be.. I know many of us have given up – or – are waiting for a miracle to turn things around for them – feeling that it will take no less than a miracle to do so; It is difficult to see a clear path of action and storm through it with unconditional confidence.

I watched this Ted Talk the other day; of the key points raised there, here is a key quote:
“So how do we crack the code on confidence? In my estimation, it takes at least three things: permission, community and curiosity. Permission births confidence,*community nurtures it*and curiosity affirms it. “

Watch the full video for the context, but I will just say this: Community – is a key aspect. TMF staff are extremely supportive – beyond my imagination. Quite a few of you signed up on the app – and it is great. Some expressed their honest appreciation and curiosity about the project – which is also great.

But all in all – I feel quite alone here. I do not feel that I have the strength of a community behind me. It is like people are sitting here, as a crowd in a lecture that they came to because their mother-in-law insisted that they go, playing with their phones, occasionally raising their eyes up to see if miraculously – something interesting happened on stage.

Please understand: I am begging for your help here. Between doing the development work, and trying to get the community’s attention, and trying to produce content for disseminating word around, and posting here and there – in English – which is not even my language(!), constantly acquiring new skills to do all these, trying, and failing, and going back to the drawing board, and coping with challenges in my own life – My brain is simply overloaded and deadlocked.

HELP!

I understand that everybody have other things in life too. You all have your lives. You all try to optimally satisfy your lives’ hungers.

But unless I am grievely mistaken – Many – if not Most - of you recognize that our situation is indeed broken. Every once in a while people talk about “past glorious days” of the community. Asking themselves and others why there are fake accounts, and a gender imbalance in the community, and the video content produced seems less and less about the connection between the lee and the ler – and more about the loudest screams, the most extreme experience, and the tightest bondage.

I think many of you want things to change – but if we keep doing things the way we do them – they will inevitably keep being the way they are!

HELP.

Did I mention “HELP!!” already..?

[video]https://www.ted.com/talks/brittany_packnett_how_to_build_your_confidence_and _spark_it_in_others[/video]

 

[Wolf]

I admire your tenacity and commitment, but I think you'll find most people have found the success you're trying to engineer simply by looking outside the "community" and doing the thing your app is designed to avoid:

Broaching the subject with a potential partner and risking a less than positive response.

And that is where confidence really brings about change.

 

[Erotickles]

Thank you for your kind words, Wolf!

However, I would like to light your statement - which is true - in a different light:

In the relevant respect - there are similarities between tickling fetishists - and members of some other minority groups:
First example: I see child-free people describing dates they have with potential partners - which they have no prior knowledge about their wishes in regards to having and raising children; (and I live in a country where not having children is unacceptable socially). I see the dilemmas on how and when is it proper to present this, and the different possible outcomes for rolling these dice within the general population.
It is different from our situation in the sense that the final, common, decision - is binary: Your either have, or don't have children. When it come to tickling one may be able to work together a version of tickling which everybody will be happy with.
It is similar in the sense that sometimes it turns out the other side does not have a strong tendency to choose this way or the other - and for the right person - they are willing to go with the flow. occasionally, it turns out the other side is child free too. sometimes it works!

A second example: Some vegetarians or vegans can make it work with meat eating partners. This too - is not 100% identical to our situation. However, it is an important example, because it is similar in the sense that the odds of success depend on the individuality of these two people: How do these two individuals experience their respective ideologies? How do they experience the difference of choices between them? What compromises is each side able to live with to make it work? The answers to these questions is personal for different people, and will not be the same for every two vegetarian<=>meet eating potential couple, right? Moreover, for some people - a meat eating - or a vegetarian partner - is simply out of the question - regardless!

The analogy for this in our community may be: what kind of tickling one likes? what is it that they like about tickling? How exactly does it fit into their sexual or sensual experience - and how is this sensation experienced by the other side? And of course - where one is on the lee / ler spectrum...

In both of these examples - members of these communities can try their luck with the general population - and for some it will work!
In both of these examples - if there are no opportunities for community members to meet each other specifically - then obviously trying to make it work with members of the general population is the only option!

But this is not to say that these communities cannot benefit from tools and opportunities to meet other like minded people! No one guarantees that they will eventually find someone otherwise compatible within their local community. But helping these local communities grow will benefit the individuals who belong to them at large, and will give them another, very viable - opportunity!

This is the same for us! joint efforts to grow our community, to form local tickling communities - and create more opportunities to meet each other - does not have to come instead of exploring relationships outside of the community. But it will add a very important, potential opportunity for us

Looking at the long list of posts in the personals section, with 0 comments, suggest that for quite a few of us, meeting other tickling community members is currently NOT HAPPENING. In this reality - than trying to make it work with potential partners outside of the community is the only way it CAN happen. In this respect - the fact the most people who have found success found it outside of the community - doesn't mean that the attempt to "engineer" a solution is either artificial nor futile. It just says that so far - there is no other option - so it is not happening - and that there is an opportunity in nurturing this direction!

 

[Comfort Eagle]

Not to be a dick but everything you post is worded and formatted like a spam e-mail for dick pills. Which is actually a point for your topic; nobody wants to indulge a kink if it's presented to them like a used car salesman trying to unload a lemon.

I'll sign up for your app, but holy crap dude, tone it down a notch.

 

[Wolf]

Looking at the long list of posts in the personals section, with 0 comments, suggest that for quite a few of us, meeting other tickling community members is currently NOT HAPPENING. In this reality - than trying to make it work with potential partners outside of the community is the only way it CAN happen. In this respect - the fact the most people who have found success found it outside of the community - doesn't mean that the attempt to "engineer" a solution is either artificial nor futile. It just says that so far - there is no other option - so it is not happening - and that there is an opportunity in nurturing this direction!

Serious question, no snark or negativity intended;

If the Personals section on a very specific website, with 133,000+ members isn't bringing people success, how is an app going to be any more successful?

 

[Lisatheticklee]

If the Personals section on a very specific website, with 133,000+ members isn't bringing people success, how is an app going to be any more successful?

Think this really hit the nail on the head and really have to ask it myself. Why would your app be any different?

 

[Yote]

I understand the point you're trying to get across but no offense, you need to work on how you format your posts. You'll get less attention than you could have if you confuse your audience.

If the Personals section on a very specific website, with 133,000+ members isn't bringing people success, how is an app going to be any more successful?

This too. Your app is likely going to get less attention than Personals, if anything.

 

[Erotickles]

Serious question, no snark or negativity intended;

If the Personals section on a very specific website, with 133,000+ members isn't bringing people success, how is an app going to be any more successful?

There are no guarantees that any new enterprise will ever succeed.
Ask every entrepreneur – even of the most successful ones - about their long list of glorious failures.

But what we can control for, is the methodology we choose to address the challenge.
So just as is taught in the “lean startup” school of thought, the first thing I did, was consulting with the community.
This led to choosing what appears the most promising direction: nurturing local groups. It will later dictate a continuous
iterative process of development and improvement, to make it an ever more suitable tool to serve its purpose.

A lot of other questions came up and were begging to be answered:
How do people currently form relationships and / or local communities?
What tools are they using, and in what ways do current tools hamper or limit success – that can be improved?

There are other factors at play, other than the specific number of accounts created over the course of 20 years...
Different tools serve different purposes in different levels of success. Have a look, for example, at this comment by Myriads – one of TMF’s owners
– in a thread raising a question about the TMF’s approachability to the different genders.

It is now easier to see, that in an environment that appears more approachable to straight men than anybody else,
some groups will inevitably be under represented, right? Moreover, isn’t such an environment, and its influence
on social dynamics, much better at enabling some sort of relationships than others?

So recognizing current problems, this app aims to be a more casual and comfortable setting for interaction,
geographically based, with an atmosphere which better supports multi-dimensional interaction.

But this goes further:
Looking at this project like yet another business that tries to serve a community is the wrong way to look at it;
This app is not a business, and not a startup. If it was – it had very little potential. It is not a concept aiming
to sell any goods or service, and will require ridiculous resources of marketing to build a sustainable user base.

It has great potential, as appears from this blog post;
However, it will only realize this potential if the community seizes this opportunity, and get behind these efforts.

And it is indeed, an opportunity:
Ask for a quote from a software company, for the development of such a group based platform,
for web and mobile (as this app will eventually support); Not including the research beforehand,
the networking required, the communication with the community – or any advertising whatsoever
– you’d be looking at a price tag of about 30,000$. Yes, 30k$.

The community is getting a blank check here. I am investing these efforts, and the work involved – voluntarily.
Moreover, this app will evolve in ways defined over the long run by the community’s needs – This is a totally
custom tool - tailored for this community; But the community will have to step out of the point of view by which
everything is a “product”, that they “consume” passively – in order to benefit from this opportunity.

As I continuously said over and over again: This is a for-the-community project – and it is up to the community to create the internal debate here:
how can each and every one of us work to materialize the vision.

I am working hard for this to succeed, and I am open as ever to cooperate with others.

 

[Wolf]

[/B]The community is getting a blank check here. I am investing these efforts, and the work involved – voluntarily.
Moreover, this app will evolve in ways defined over the long run by the community’s needs – This is a totally
custom tool - tailored for this community; But the community will have to step out of the point of view by which
everything is a “product”, that they “consume” passively – in order to benefit from this opportunity.

As I continuously said over and over again: This is a for-the-community project – and it is up to the community to create the internal debate here:
how can each and every one of us work to materialize the vision.

I am working hard for this to succeed, and I am open as ever to cooperate with others.

I work for a pretty successful (so far) little tech start-up. Nice folks. Benefit package / stock options are pretty sweet, too.
Your plan is deeply flawed, because you're hoping that the app will attract a demographic that is not evident here in the numbers that would make it viable. You have no data to suggest that an app would attract a more varied group than what is already here.

It's like trying to open a restaurant in a town you've never even visited.

 

[Libertine]

I work for a pretty successful (so far) little tech start-up. Nice folks. Benefit package / stock options are pretty sweet, too.
Your plan is deeply flawed, because you're hoping that the app will attract a demographic that is not evident here in the numbers that would make it viable. You have no data to suggest that an app would attract a more varied group than what is already here.

It's like trying to open a restaurant in a town you've never even visited.

Not to be a dick but everything you post is worded and formatted like a spam e-mail for dick pills. Which is actually a point for your topic; nobody wants to indulge a kink if it's presented to them like a used car salesman trying to unload a lemon.

I read three lines and went blind

When a true genius appears, you can know him by this sign: that all the dunces are in a confederacy against him.

Jonathan Swift (1667 - 1745)

Gentleman's first language does not appear to be English, but his ideas seem well-expressed.

I'm still very happy with My Dear Wife, BTW, but if Erotickles' new take on an old subject helps someone, it's worth it.

The Wright Brothers' airplane evolved, after all.

And before its invention, the possibility of heavier than air flight was universally mocked.

 

[Wolf]

When a true genius appears, you can know him by this sign: that all the dunces are in a confederacy against him.

Jonathan Swift (1667 - 1745)

Gentleman's first language does not appear to be English, but his ideas seem well-expressed.

I'm still very happy with My Dear Wife, BTW, but if Erotickles' new take on an old subject helps someone, it's worth it.

The Wright Brothers' airplane evolved, after all.

And before its invention, the possibility of heavier than air flight was universally mocked.

Missed the part where I complimented him on his tenacity and commitment, and continued to try and ask questions without any snark, until he decided to throw down about "lean startups" and blaming the community as a whole, did you?

 

[Comfort Eagle]

When a true genius appears, you can know him by this sign: that all the dunces are in a confederacy against him.

Jonathan Swift (1667 - 1745)

lmao wow what a smartass. Nobody is screaming at him it's a bad idea, there's merely a suggestion that something resembling tact could be of assistance.

What is like the universal number one complaint from tickle people? That "the mainstream" is constantly picking on them and stereotyping them for absolutely no reason. It seems when the entire idea seems to be breaking through the "misconceptions" around the tickle people, being aware of how certain phrasing is going to strike people already not in the know might be at least worth a consideration.

 

[chicago]

T's hard to readeth thy posts. I behold f'rward to thy furth'r responses

 

[Wolf]

T's hard to readeth thy posts. I behold f'rward to thy furth'r responses

Aaand, Scene.

 

[Libertine]

T's hard to readeth thy posts. I behold f'rward to thy furth'r responses

And you may have one, sans spurious apostrophes or leaden attempts at literacy, Mistress Fustilugs.

 

[Erotickles]

I work for a pretty successful (so far) little tech start-up. Nice folks. Benefit package / stock options are pretty sweet, too.
Your plan is deeply flawed, because you're hoping that the app will attract a demographic that is not evident here in the numbers that would make it viable. You have no data to suggest that an app would attract a more varied group than what is already here.

It's like trying to open a restaurant in a town you've never even visited.

Look, Wolf (and others):

I agree with you: The app will not magically grow or diversify the community on its own!
As I previously expressed – the app is a TOOL, and it is up to us to create those communities.
Needless to say – putting an app in the store and expecting it to grow exponentially just because
it is available – is a false hope indeed.

Still, this app is designed to greatly enable - and is probably required -
to allow this process of growth and diversifying to happen at all:

If you follow the process of the app conception from the beginning, you will come across several
initial posts, trying to figure out together with the community here - what the best direction is.

The comments in these posts, together with several other inputs, yielded results:

• That the prevalence to accepting tickling in the sexual context in the general population
  is greater than it seems.
• That there are several demographic groups under represented - or unwilling to take an active role -
  in current platforms due to the nature of these platforms.
  For example, as explained well in the already mentioned comment by Myriads:
  The trade off of having a free forum of tickling media – is that its vibe centralizes on a very specific male perspective of the fetish.
  Though there are undoubtedly “playful ticklephiles” in the crowd (and evidently – some women) - this environment is not
  one that supports these demographic groups’ retention and growth within the community.

The gap between the potential out there and the reality in here, and recognizing these trade offs,
suggest that changing this reality requires a combined effort:

One, is supplying an alternative platform, a “hosting space” to hang out, that is neutral –
and is therefore more inviting to demographic groups that are uncomfortable with current platforms.

The second – is reaching out outside of the community, and inviting those out there – into this neutral hosting space - to hanging out.

Doing the first without the second – will probably fail.
Doing the second without the first – will probably fail.
Doing both – has an actual chance to change things.

If you look it up – you will see that I have expressed the necessity for us to represent this community outwards.
I wrote about it in this thread about Netfilx “bonding”, for example.
It was also the path I suggested in my first video – which I launched when I presented the app.

My point here, is that though there are no promises of success (and there never are),
and though I made no promise to not make any mistakes, The process and concept are thought of.
Though it is evidently not an easy fix “just make an app and everything will change” -
it is a process that has a chance to transform things. I actually can not think of an
easier or more sure way to do so (or I would have taken that way…).

One last, personal, note.
I made great efforts to be honest and frank, to approach the community with the proper humility on the one hand
– while reflecting the seriousness, thoroughness, effort, and magnitude of this opportunity.
This project cannot be done commercially, in my opinion – but it seems that once something is voluntary
and is expected to be free – people tend to underestimate it and even shit on it.

I am far from perfect, and am forced to do some things that are outside of my skill set here.
As noted bluntly by several commenters in this thread, my writing is long and maybe even tedious.
I cannot think of a shorter way to explain these things in a way that reflects all necessary points.

My question is, why are people so eager to insult me, or go to greatest length to argue how everything I do is wrong,
instead of taking on this opportunity and accepting the invitation to be a part of change?
Given I am not good at conveying the required messages – why isn’t anyone saying
“Allow me to to convay these ideas – I am good at it – and let me free you to do the development work you are doing”?

You accused me, @Wolf, of “blaming the community”. I honestly made efforts for it to be a callout, or a cry out -
anything BUT blaming!
I can only assume that by “blaming” you are referring to me writing the the community is passive – in the “cry for help” that is my top post.
How else should I have expressed it? And really, can I ask you to cut me some slack here? I am not your enemy (!)

I am doing my best to be nice and friendly – while evidently in this thread – not everyone are. But you know what – one doesn’t even
have to like me to join this effort; they only need to recognize that there is an project here with potential;
That the person leading it is making his best efforts to invite others to make a meaningful impact - so it has the best chance of success.

Why is there so much resistance here? Do you want things to change at all..?

 

[Wolf]

Again - I've not insulted you or belittled you. But since you want to talk straight, let's talk straight.

This is what you want.

In an ideal, fantastic, reality - every person who has an affiliation to the tickling fetish – would have a distinctive halo over their heads. Then, when we saw someone we liked and are attracted to – it would be for that – merely as one of many other things we were attracted to them for:
they look at us in that way – that we know that they notice us too,
they excite us, they impress us, they resonate with us, and they make us curious,
they appeal to us physically,
and oh – look at that halo – which promises that the intimacy with them will also be abundant, with wild, passionate, much desired, and exciting ticklish screams!

What you want is a scenario where you can find a willing partner without having to risk rejection by actually asking for what you want.


However, the demographic you strenuously contend you are trying to serve is heavily skewed. There are women, here, to be sure; but women who have an interest in tickling on any level don't need an app (or even a website) to find a partner, if that's all they want. The demographics here should show you that.

There is no amount of thinking or passionate entreaties to "the community" that will replace what a little self-reflection, a little hard work, and a little courage could accomplish.

So, I'm not denigrating your efforts. I'm saying your goal could be accomplished by focusing your energies in a manner that would have a better chance of success for you.

 

[Erotickles]

Let's drop the issue of shame at the door: I am referring a lot to shame in regards to the
fetish - because it is a true and painful issue for many of us either in the past and/or at the present.
We cannot honestly discuss our ability to connect with others without recognizing that it is a present
issue for many of us.
However, please keep in mind, that I am the guy who put a video of himself on YouTube telling the
world he has a tickling fetish. Furthermore - I did this not only knowing that once you put something
on YouTube - it may go anywhere;
I did it with a clear hope that people will share it - as it was my way of presenting the case for this project.
I further referred in my video to my experiences when "coming out" in front of friends as well as when
trying to explore it with past partners. This means - that suggesting that I am making this app as a
personal attempt to avoid shame and "play it safe" - is an inaccurate representation.

PS
I do not consider you as one of those insulting me;
Though we disagree - you made efforts to present your points respectfully, and I am grateful to you for that.

 

[Wolf]

Let's drop the issue of shame at the door: I am referring a lot to shame in regards to the
fetish - because it is a true and painful issue for many of us either in the past and/or at the present.
We cannot honestly discuss our ability to connect with others without recognizing that it is a present
issue for many of us.
However, please keep in mind, that I am the guy who put a video of himself on YouTube telling the
world he has a tickling fetish. Furthermore - I did this not only knowing that once you put something
on YouTube - it may go anywhere;
I did it with a clear hope that people will share it - as it was my way of presenting the case for this project.
I further referred in my video to my experiences when "coming out" in front of friends as well as when
trying to explore it with past partners. This means - that suggesting that I am making this app as a
personal attempt to avoid shame and "play it safe" - is an inaccurate representation.

PS
I do not consider you as one of those insulting me;
Though we disagree - you made efforts to present your points respectfully, and I am grateful to you for that.

I didn't say shame. I said "rejection" .

 

[Barney Stubble]

When a true genius appears, you can know him by this sign: that all the dunces are in a confederacy against him.

Jonathan Swift (1667 - 1745)

Gentleman's first language does not appear to be English, but his ideas seem well-expressed.

I'm still very happy with My Dear Wife, BTW, but if Erotickles' new take on an old subject helps someone, it's worth it.

The Wright Brothers' airplane evolved, after all.

And before its invention, the possibility of heavier than air flight was universally mocked.

Well said, sir.

 

[SilentSnake1995]

Okay, so I've read this whole thread and felt the strong urge to say something about this. Long time lurker, first time poster, came here to say this, the whole shebang. So, here goes:

Serious question, no snark or negativity intended;
If the Personals section on a very specific website, with 133,000+ members isn't bringing people success, how is an app going to be any more successful?

Serious answer, with no snark or negativity intended. Here are a couple of points to consider:

1. I honestly have no idea why are you even trying to compare the TC app to the Personals section. As far as I know, Personals are designed for people to meet specifically for tickling sessions, mainly one on one. Moreover, these sessions aren't necceserily going to take place where the person lives. I'm sure you've seen a lot of "I'll be at city X next weekend, does anybody want to have a session with me?" kind of posts. On the other hand, TC is being designed for people with a tickle fetish to form local groups, which goes beyond the possibility of just having a tickle session. If there is a section of TMF you should compare the app to, then it's probably General Gatherings, not Personals.

2. Why are you trying to use the number of accounts registered on TMF as an argument? Do you have any idea how many of these accounts are active and posting? How many of these accounts are lurkers? How many of these accounts are dead or abandoned? Well, I'm pretty sure you don't, but please correct me if I'm wrong. I don't blame you though, because I don't have any idea either. So it seems like trying to use this approximate number to prove or disprove anything in this particular dispute is not really a good idea.

3. You seriously can't see how a platform specifically developed to organize local gatherings will be better at organizing local gathering then a section on an Internet forum? I'm guessing the only reason why TMF is able to organize any gathering in the first plase is because it's older, bigger and better fit for it as a platform than any other tickling platform we have at the moment. However, just because this is the best platform to organize gatherings at the moment, doesn't mean that it's the best platform to organize gatherings in general.

4. I've mentioned other tickling platforms, so let's name a few. Keep in mind that while some of these relate to tickling as a whole, some do only in certain parts. A good list would look something like this:

- r/tickling on Reddit

- /tk/ thread on 8chan, before 8chan was taken down

- Tickling oriented servers on Discord

- Twitter

- Tumblr, before the NSFW ban

- DeviantArt

- Pixiv

- Kusubooru

- Some groups on FetLife

- Other forums like Tickle Theater and forums in languages other than English

Now, I've been to some extent on all of these platforms, except the last two, and I can safely say this: Some people there are not happy with the way TMF manages things, so they don't use it because of that. Also, there are a few people on these platforms that have never even heard of TMF. Not to mention, there are certainly some people with a tickle fetish that don't frequent any of these platforms at all. If we can bring people from different parts of the community together by creating a new platform that doesn't inherit the previous ones' flaws, it may very well have the potential to grow to the current size of TMF, if not bigger.

5. I'm sure a lot of you already know this, but TMF is really old. And I don't mean old in a good, elderly way. It's technologically outdated, which, I feel like, is a big problem for younger parts of our community, including me. Seriously, sometimes the site is really hard to navigate. This might very well be one of the reasons why some people prefer to use other currently available platforms. I also feel like creating an app that is more technologically advanced, have a better design and is easy to use will greatly benefit our community, in more ways than one.

6. The creation of the local tickling communities is a way to go, because it has the potential of serving almost any possible end goal a person with a tickle fetish might have. Do you want to find a patner for a tickling session? Go to your local group gathering and see if you can find somebody. Looking for a more intimate, long-lasting relationship? Go to your local group gathering and see if you can find somebody, but be more careful. Just want to discuss some tickling related things in a company of fellow like-minded individuals? Well, can you guess what's the answer to this one going to be? That's right, go to your local group gathering.

Look, I'm not saying that the current system doesn't work. It does. But it works mainly for those who live in US or UK, due to a lot of different factors, all of which I don't feel like thinking about right now. This project has the potential to become something truly great for our community, worldwide, and I feel like we should believe in it more. I know some of you are skeptical towards it, but you can't really do something unless you try. Nothing is guaranteed to succeed, ever, but that doesn't mean that approaching everything with a "Well, what if it fails?" mentality is a great course of action.

What do you guys think? Is it possible to open a good restaurant in a city you've never visited before?

P. S. I have no idea what's your guys' problem is with the way Erotickles formats his messages. Sure, blocks of big colored text and a lot of bold might be an eyesore, but other than that he expresses himself pretty clearly.

P. P. S. Sorry for a wall of text.

 

[Wolf]

(Sparing all another Wall of Text).

The quote you posted was my response to the OP's argument.

Quote Originally Posted by Erotickles
Looking at the long list of posts in the personals section, with 0 comments, suggest that for quite a few of us, meeting other tickling community members is currently NOT HAPPENING. In this reality - than trying to make it work with potential partners outside of the community is the only way it CAN happen. In this respect - the fact the most people who have found success found it outside of the community - doesn't mean that the attempt to "engineer" a solution is either artificial nor futile. It just says that so far - there is no other option - so it is not happening - and that there is an opportunity in nurturing this direction!


Again, I've complimented him on his tenacity and commitment; my issue was his blaming his app's failure on a lack of help from this "community".
I think there are other factors, that's all.

 

[BeautifullyBNT]

Wow. You guys can sure suck the fun out of this forum!

 

[SilentSnake1995]

Again, I've complimented him on his tenacity and commitment; my issue was his blaming his app's failure on a lack of help from this "community".
I think there are other factors, that's all.

Well, first of all, I wouldn't call it a failure, yet. I think it would be most sufficient to say that it's in a stage of beta-testing right now. In regards to your argument:

On one hand, there are most definitely other factors at fault. For example, I personally think that the course of action he chose for the start-up was wrong. After the app started working, the key message seemed to be "Spread the word and get as many people as possible on board!". And if you think about it, it's not that hard to do. Message the moderators on Reddit, relevant people on Twitter, start the thread on 8chan (when it gets back up), etc. However, doing that right now would be a bad move. The app is still rough around the edges. And if it's rough around the edges, a lot of people will reject it just because it is. Anyone who has ever tried to present something to the public knows this, you can't pitch an unfinished product.

On the other hand, you can't say that a lack of help is not a problem. Doesn't matter how much tenacity and commitment he has, he's just one man. A man who lives in a country that's in a constant state of war, at that. And even if he wasn't, he would still very quickly come to a point where he needs staff. Global moderators, maybe a web designer or a second programmer. And I'm sure you understand why these people would have to be from within the community. However, for some reason not many people seem to care. I think what he should've done was posting a list of people he needs and what skills they need to have, then trying to find someone willing on the forum.

Wow. You guys can sure suck the fun out of this forum!

Well, sorry about that. It's never fun when people start trying to organize something, so it's kind of inevitable.

 

[Iggy pop]

2. Why are you trying to use the number of accounts registered on TMF as an argument? Do you have any idea how many of these accounts are active and posting? How many of these accounts are lurkers? How many of these accounts are dead or abandoned? Well, I'm pretty sure you don't, but please correct me if I'm wrong. I don't blame you though, because I don't have any idea either. So it seems like trying to use this approximate number to prove or disprove anything in this particular dispute is not really a good idea.

I agree with on this. Many of the accounts on here are dead, abandoned, or are duplicate, and this is relevant to my next point.

3. You seriously can't see how a platform specifically developed to organize local gatherings will be better at organizing local gathering then a section on an Internet forum? I'm guessing the only reason why TMF is able to organize any gathering in the first plase is because it's older, bigger and better fit for it as a platform than any other tickling platform we have at the moment. However, just because this is the best platform to organize gatherings at the moment, doesn't mean that it's the best platform to organize gatherings in general.

4. I've mentioned other tickling platforms, so let's name a few. Keep in mind that while some of these relate to tickling as a whole, some do only in certain parts. A good list would look something like this:

- r/tickling on Reddit

- /tk/ thread on 8chan, before 8chan was taken down

- Tickling oriented servers on Discord

- Twitter

- Tumblr, before the NSFW ban

- DeviantArt

- Pixiv

- Kusubooru

- Some groups on FetLife

- Other forums like Tickle Theater and forums in languages other than English

Now, I've been to some extent on all of these platforms, except the last two, and I can safely say this: Some people there are not happy with the way TMF manages things, so they don't use it because of that. Also, there are a few people on these platforms that have never even heard of TMF. Not to mention, there are certainly some people with a tickle fetish that don't frequent any of these platforms at all. If we can bring people from different parts of the community together by creating a new platform that doesn't inherit the previous ones' flaws, it may very well have the potential to grow to the current size of TMF, if not bigger.

I haven't been to all those different platforms, but I have been to a few. And the few that I visted were not as active as the TMF, and the majority of the content on those platforms were links to pirated material. Moreover, as you noted in your post some of those places are already dead. The issue, in my opinion, has nothing to do with platforms. The fact is the tickling "community" is small, a mere fraction of the general poplulation( how small I do not exactly know). As you noted the number of accounts on the TMF is not a true reflection of the actual population, but I do not believe that you are going to find a massive population on other platforms. Yes, you may find some people, but my guess is you are not going to find millions. Not only are tickle fetishists small in number, they are also 85-90% male. When you couple these facts together it makes difficult for a hetrosexual male to find a partner in the "community". A switch in platform will not change this if the above facts are correct. The only way app fixes this is if (1)there is massive population out there that has not joined the TMF, (2) that population has an even amount of women and men, (3) that population is more than willing to use this app, despite rejecting previous platforms. Let's just say I have doubts about all three of those points. I know that there are a lot of incels on here, but there is fair number of guys that are relationships on here as well, and from reading their posts and chatting with them, most found their tickle partners outside the "community" This is what I did, and I've been married over 10 years. That is why I think the best option for most is looking outside the community and their efforts would be best be placed in that direction rather than expecting to find a partner with an shiny new tickle app.