Want a partner but have no idea what to do

[LostandNew]

Hey, everyone. As my username suggests I'm new to the site and confused about where to start. As a little bit of backstory I'm an 18 y/o M living in the North Eastern US. I've known for many years that I've had a tickle fetish but have never had a way to, shall I say, indulge in it. I've been honestly pretty desperate for a while now. I really want to find a great partner that I can go all out on and tickle to my heart's content, but the odds of me finding people through normal means (talking, social events, etc.) are pretty nonexistent. I've talked to a few friends who know people into weirder fetishes but they keep telling me that they don't know anyone into tickling and there's almost no chance I'll find someone. I also can't exactly go around asking about it because tickling and feet are two VERY shunned fetishes around where I live. I'm coming here because I honestly don't know what to do. I want to look and hopefully find a great 'lee but I don't know where to start. Could any of you guys help me?

 

[CapturedDoll]

I suggest you make a video (wear sunglasses if you must protect your identity) and make a 5 minute video. Post it in the personals section. I think most women find it hard to gravitate to a written ad/post. Now I know most women say they don't want to find someone in a sexual based site. But then why is Fetlife doing so well? And while you're at it... set up a Fetlife account. Let women see you and be able to read and hopefully hear via audio what your personality is like.

 

[LostandNew]

The problem I'm seeing with FetLife though is that the anonymity isn't there. I'm really scared someone would see me there and spread it around that I'm into that stuff, which wouldn't be good

 

[CapturedDoll]

Well then you have other options.

Skype or trade pics privately.
Make a post in the personals section.
Go to Gatherings.
Go to munches.
Be as active as you can be on here so people will begin to see your personality through your posts.
Go to BDSM fetish play parties in your area.
All of the above.

You have to at least be willing for your personality to shine through within the posts you make. Or else it will be hard for people to be inclined to contact you. At gatherings people understand the need for anonymity so... that I feel will be your best bet in meeting people to play with. But if you can do all of the above that will definitely help you.

 

[chicago]

If you want to maintain privacy and find a Lee, it's gonna make things difficult. I'm sure people aren't gonna want to meet up without without video chatting first or something.

And just remember, as intense as your desire is, the Lee is gonna have their own desires and wants and boundaries. Theirs another person not a thing to satiate thirst.

 

[Wolf]

I think it's much smarter to find people you're compatible with in a general sense first, then worry about the compatibly with your fetish.
You're not going to find someone who feels exactly the same way you do about your sexual desires unless you manage to clone yourself.

 

[FFT32]

LostandNew, Like many other things in life, this is a process. You have to be patient and stay positive. You have been given some very good information thus far. Allow me to expand on some of the positives you have going for you. Which are:

1) You are fully aware of your fetish and willing to act on it.
2) Your age is a tremendous positive as you have a life time ahead of you to explore and indulge.
3) You are willing to consider the avenues that are available, i.e. TMF, FetLife, etc.
4) Privacy is important to all of us to varying degrees. You need to be open to adjustments to your degree of comfort on this. You will come to see that as you age, your position on this will most likely change.

Keep going!

 

[ISUmark]

First of, welcome to the TMF bro. I hope you enjoy your stay and stick around. Now to the topic on hand. Welcome to being an 18 year old with a tickle fetish. It feels embarrassing and awkward. I have to ask though, why is going out and socializing not an option? If you want to try on here its fine but honestly you're better off interacting in the community and writing stuff in posts or talking in the chatroom, then you are in the personals. I'm sure that over the period of 18 years or so since this place existed, that there have been successful meetings through the personal sections that weren't MUNCH/Gathering related, but probably not many. I dated a girl from here for awhile and it wasn't from the personal section. I just noticed her saying something interesting in a post and shot her a message and a friend request. Guys here do horribly because since they assume its a fetish forum they can go balls deep and talk about tickling right away. They don't understand that the gates to complete fetish satisfaction, that 100% tickle saturation...is right behind this door with a lock on it. How do you open that lock? Not by trying to shove your dick in it("ZOMG YOURE SO CUTE LEMME SEE YOUR FEETTTSSS WHERE TU TKLSH LOL") but by taking the time to get to know the person they are. Talking to them about interests or current events. Its easy to know if you click or not. Then comes the picture exchange to make sure you aren't being catfished. I was catfished in my earlier years and it sucks. Once you two crazy kids decide you like each other maybe the ticking subject is finally broached. From there arranged meets etc etc. The thing is, its exactly the same in real life.

Your 18 and its embarrassing. Theres no need to come right out with it right away when you're getting to know a girl. At a younger age like yours, success with "vanillas" comes from dating them the way you would date a woman if you didn't have a tickle fetish, but instead just throw a little tickling in and no one is the wiser. I wasn't up-front with potential girlfriends about my fetish until I was about 24...that was just the year I figured out I wasn't embarrassed by it anymore. That year is different for different people. Now a days since I'm a little older(34) I know exactly what I want and I let a girl know within the first couple of conversations. At my age you don't really want to waste your time only to find out that the woman isn't ticklish or HATES being tickled. But at 18 years old...holy hell man. IF its an option just go out and socialize. 99% of my tickling adventures up until age 18 came from girls I knew from high school. Its out there my friend. Don't think of your fetish like some big, ugly, embarrassing monster that everyone laughs at you about. Think about it as you being truly more unique then 99% of the people around you all the time. Its kind of cool when you think about it that way. Good luck man and feel free to ask these kind of questions throughout the community. There are thousands of guys on this forum that have gone through the exact same thing that you're going through right now. I guess when we are all old men and mainlining Viagra we will pass the torch and guys like you will lead on the younger generation of us perverted tickler/tickleess.

 

[LostandNew]

that I feel will be your best bet in meeting people to play with.

I'll definitely try. I plan to be more active here if possible. I've known about this site for quite some time but wasn't sure if it was something I would stick to. Now I know that I plan to, and I'll definitely try to at least look into everything you mentioned

 

[LostandNew]

Theirs another person not a thing to satiate thirst.

I fully understand that and I'm sorry if I made it seem that way. But I want to make sure they enjoy it too

 

[LostandNew]

I think it's much smarter to find people you're compatible with in a general sense first, then worry about the compatibly with your fetish.

But what if I do find someone I'm compatible with but who's not compatible with my fetish? I wouldn't entirely be sure what to do in that situation

 

[LostandNew]

Don't think of your fetish like some big, ugly, embarrassing monster that everyone laughs at you about. Think about it as you being truly more unique then 99% of the people around you all the time.

This whole message is really eye-opening. And I guess it's right along the lines of what FFT32 was saying about adjusting and getting more comfortable with it. It'll definitely take time. It's bad enough I worry so much about my image as it is (I used to be much larger and am still working to where I'm happy with myself) that having this taboo kink that a lot of people frown upon doesn't really help. I'm trying to become more comfortable with it, which is kind of why I came here, but this message is definitely reassuring and it's something I'll work harder towards.

Plus you're right. I do have a lot of time and I don't need to get 100% comfortable with it right away. But if there's anything I can take from all of these replies it's to try different things and keep at it

 

[mealzonwheels]

But what if I do find someone I'm compatible with but who's not compatible with my fetish? I wouldn't entirely be sure what to do in that situation

this is why it's always better to actively seek out someone with similar interests

 

[Wolf]

But what if I do find someone I'm compatible with but who's not compatible with my fetish? I wouldn't entirely be sure what to do in that situation

Enjoy that you found someone compatible, and move on, if that's your wish.
Looking for people who are "outwardly" compatible with your fetish is far too limiting, and, in my experience, people tend to pass up a lot of opportunities, just because a woman doesn't have a visible tattoo that says "I have a tickle fetish!"

 

[duderino84]

This is the time I'll agree with Wolf. It's True, you'll have more to talk about. Not just about what gives you a hardon.

I know you probably want to meet someone that you can offload all the baggage and excitement to, and at first it sounds great. But trust me, there's just some parts of yourself that are like the fatty bits on the chicken after they cook down. They aren't that appetizing to anyone but yourself.

 

[chicago]

It's possible to find people just wanting to play without all the pseudo relationship bs too, especially on sites like this or fetlife.

 

[ISUmark]

It's possible to find people just wanting to play without all the pseudo relationship bs too, especially on sites like this or fetlife.

You're absolutely right. I'm glad this young gentleman is heeding everyone's wise words. For a guy his age though, 18 years old/shy/still coming to grips with his fetish, its probably better for him to enjoy the comforts of a relationship and have the tickling as a nice little extra. I tend to think that SOME people...note that I said SOME...tend to develop a certain kind of attitude if most of their tickling was done in arranged sessions very early on. It kind of puts a strange taint on the whole experience and they might not be as successful with tickling in a relationship after all they've experienced is sessions. Almost like the tickling is implied/expected very early on in the relationship. Does this make any sense to anyone? Like I said though I'm not putting everyone under this its not a blanket statement. Each person is different, but from the sounds of this guys posts relationships first THEN sessions might be better, but who knows I don't charge people money to lay on my couch and talk to me.

 

[chicago]

Yeah, I was just offering another option. Not gonna read that far into his life or get that hardcore with the advice like everyone else. To each their own. Whatever makes ya happy.

 

[Wolf]

Everyone's got their own style, their own experiences, and their own perspective. I know my approach wouldn't work for everyone.
Hell, I'm surprised it worked for me.

 

[LostandNew]

Does this make any sense to anyone?

I think it makes sense. I can definitely see what you're getting at

 

[mariowuitomari]

Go to Uk. Many (relatively) ticklish movement. Us is too big but. If you go to other country with more interested people you will success. In Spain I am eating my fists because here is almost imposible to find any interested ticklish girl. It is more probable that a meteorite land in my house.

 

[Wolf]

Go to Uk. Many (relatively) ticklish movement. Us is too big but. If you go to other country with more interested people you will success. In Spain I am eating my fists because here is almost imposible to find any interested ticklish girl. It is more probable that a meteorite land in my house.

Many people, in many different locations, blame their locations.

 

[duderino84]

I haven't heard many bad things about Brazil. ....

 

[Wolf]

I haven't heard many bad things about Brazil. ....

Or the Czech Republic.

 

[duderino84]

Or the Czech Republic.

Well I'd have to choose. Between visual/societal/climate preferences and music scene. Lot of grindcore/death metal bands from the Czech republic and surrounding countries...

Do you really think people are prettymuch the same wherever you go? I mean, there are for better or worse sites that suggest otherwise....