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Girlfriend not into Tickle videos?

F

fonzieluck

TMF Regular
Joined
May 27, 2006
Messages
287
Points
28
Alright so I turn to the forum for help. My girlfriend and I are serious and she knows that I have a tickling fetish as well as a bondage and sock fetish. We do our own tickling sessions and everything else. She is into it and everything. No need to explain that.

My problem is, my girlfriend is angry that I watch tickle videos that I buy from clips4sale. She says that it is very wrong and makes her feel like I am into the girls that are being tickled and doing the tickling. I explained to her the same fact about porn and how it is not the people but the actions that you watch. I explained to her also that I have many tickling videos that I bought over the years, and that I would love watching them just for my personal pleasure.

She took great offense for that and was very upset. She asked me if she can watch them with me and I agreed that it would be NO problem at all. Obviously if I'm in the privacy of my own house when she is at work, I would watch them still. But has anyone ever heard of this issue with their girlfriend or boyfriend? Thanks so much for your help!
 
I have a headache that won't go away so maybe I shouldn't say anything, but imma say somethig and might be blunt about it lol

if she's not into them, stop watching them... if she indulges in your fetish why do you need them? She lets you indulge it in real life, no need to watch videos of it happening... you get the real thing.
 
mtTicklemonster said:
I have a headache that won't go away so maybe I shouldn't say anything, but imma say somethig and might be blunt about it lol

if she's not into them, stop watching them... if she indulges in your fetish why do you need them? She lets you indulge it in real life, no need to watch videos of it happening... you get the real thing.
Click to expand...

I'm sorry for your headache hun 🙁. He does have a good point. I never experience the problem that you are having because my boyfriend just like your gf indulges in my fetish all the time so there is no need and desire to watch a tickling video on my end.
 
mtTicklemonster said:
I have a headache that won't go away so maybe I shouldn't say anything, but imma say somethig and might be blunt about it lol

if she's not into them, stop watching them... if she indulges in your fetish why do you need them? She lets you indulge it in real life, no need to watch videos of it happening... you get the real thing.
Click to expand...

I never thought I would say this but he is right .
 
Hmm, why did she ask to watch them with you? I ask because I know of couples who watch porn together and they have no problem with it so I'm a bit confused as to her motivation.
 
YES... And I was the "problem".

The first guy that I was dating and "caught" looking at porn- I pretty much felt betrayed. We had this HUGE argument. HUGE!!!!!!!!

I'll admit that this was when I was young, I was waiting until I was married to have sex, I didn't watch or own ANY clips (including tk clips), I didn't know that TMF existed... I had so many issues besides the fact that I thought they were gross, and I felt like I was being disrespected in some way.

Thankfully, I had some married sisters at the time, so I asked them for advise. Not to generalize, but they said that most guys are into some level of porn whether via internet or the collection of videos they possessed. They explained some things to me that kind of made it clearer. (I still didn't really like it- still don't) But well- My ex-boyfriend and I kind of patched things up. I made a compromise- He could tickle me... while we watched one of his little "flicks". Problem- Solution. (It only happened once though. Loved the tickling.... still hated the porn- and I STILL hate it! LOL)

Not every girl is like me, and they don't have to be. Just because you like to watch clips or are into various things does not mean your girlfriend has to be. You aren't going to change the fact that she feels a bit as if you are more into fantasy than what you have right in front of you. Or that it makes her feel inadequate in some way. And likewise, she can't change the fact that you like to watch them.

If you ever want to actually STAY in a relationship, you are gonna learn really soon that it is about give and take and about compromise. Every woman has her limits, and you can't force something. (Even if she decides suddenly that she doesn't want to watch them with you, and that she still hates it.) It is not the end of the world. Respect her boundaries and do not watch that stuff around her. Tell her you understand how she feels and that you will do what you can to make sure she isn't exposed to the clips. If that is something that might be a problem with you... ask yourself how much you truly like her.

There are things my husband watches and that he is into that I am TOTALLY not into. I'm just not into it, and vice versa. Her feelings are not a issue. She can't change the way she feels, but you can respect how she feels, patch things up, and realize that you have a good thing in front of you. 😀
 
A lot of women feel threatened when their partner looks at porn/clips/strippers/women on the street. If you ask me, they are insecure about themselves and overly sensitive, but that's just my opinion.

Personally I think if you believe your man doesn't watch porn you are in some serious denial. 🙂

And if he actually doesn't watch porn, there might be something wrong with him! 😉
 
rhiannon said:
A lot of women feel threatened when their partner looks at porn/clips/strippers/women on the street. If you ask me, they are insecure about themselves and overly sensitive, but that's just my opinion.

Personally I think if you believe your man doesn't watch porn you are in some serious denial. 🙂

And if he actually doesn't watch porn, there might be something wrong with him! 😉
Click to expand...

Exactly. :clap:

If I understand, this isn't about you trying to force anything on her. This is about her trying to control something about your private behaviour, and that's not something you have to 'compromise' about. Your girlfriend needs to get over herself.
 
I don't get why people freak out over porn/tickle videos/other fetish videos. It's just something to enjoy alone- as long as it isn't taking away from your person life with your partner or interferring with your real life, then why is it a problem?
 
If your partner feels that strongly about it, then you do need to be sensitive to her feelings. Perhaps she will come around...Watch one with her, it can really heat things up and maybe she will see that she is actually being very silly about it. I actually encourage my boyfriend to watch tickling clips etc. I even email him links to ones that I think are sexy. It's only a problem when it becomes an obsession and interferes with your relationship. It sounds like you have a healthy sex life, so be sensitive and patient. In relationships we do have to learn not to hurt the ones we love and she does indulge your fetish... I actually love pleasuring my boyfriend while he is aroused by watching a clip... and when he is away (which is most of the time) it's nice to have a visual of what I wish I could be doing with him...
Be happy you've got the real thing!
 
rhiannon said:
And if he actually doesn't watch porn, there might be something wrong with him! 😉
Click to expand...

I don't agree with this... He could just not feel the need to watch porn because he feels satisified in real life...

if I got to tickle someone on a regular basis that I'm attracted to, I probably wouldn't watch tickle videos. Not because there's something wrong with me but because I feel satisfied in the real world.
 
c7_assassin said:
Exactly. :clap:

If I understand, this isn't about you trying to force anything on her. This is about her trying to control something about your private behaviour, and that's not something you have to 'compromise' about. Your girlfriend needs to get over herself.
Click to expand...

It's not wrong for her to get upset at him watching videos with other naked girls involved with sexual acts.. sure it's not as bad as cheating on her, but there's nothing wrong with it, maybe she feels like she's not enough for him which she's doing what she can to please him by indulging in his fetish.
 
mtTicklemonster said:
I don't agree with this... He could just not feel the need to watch porn because he feels satisified in real life...
Click to expand...

Do you know any guy who is completely and utterly satisfied in real life?
I know a couple, and they still watch porn.
 
He could just not feel the need to watch porn because he feels satisified in real life...
Click to expand...

One has nothing to do with the other! Masturbation and porn has absolutely nothing to do with how good or bad your sex life is! Sometimes I simply don't feel like going the whole nine yards with foreplay, sex, afterplay...sometimes I just want to watch a tickling clip and masturbate, be done within ten minutes and be left alone! 🙂

It is totally detached from the sex life with my husband, and I dare to say it is exactly the same way for most other people as well.

If your partner feels that strongly about it, then you do need to be sensitive to her feelings.
Click to expand...

Careful here! Some reactions are over the top! I know a lot of people who have a lot of unreasonable strong feelings about stuff that their partner does.....you don't have to be sensitive about everything, or one day your partner will decide what you can and can't do!
 
On the one hand, it's rare to find a girl that's attractive and willing to indulge your fetish. You don't want to quickly jeopardize anything like that. On the other hand, her opposition to you watching porn is born 100% out of insecurities. That's something you want to discourage at every opportunity.

I would simply watch the videos while alone and keep it locked up to where she can't access it.
 
rhiannon said:
A lot of women feel threatened when their partner looks at porn/clips/strippers/women on the street. If you ask me, they are insecure about themselves and overly sensitive, but that's just my opinion.

Personally I think if you believe your man doesn't watch porn you are in some serious denial. 🙂
Click to expand...

This is as the kids say......ON POINT!!!
 
I agree with Ryan.... i cant believe i am saying this but steve is right on this one. Relationships and love are all about the ability to meet each others needs and understand each other. she may feel insecure about u watch these videos because she feels like she isnt satisfying you enough. in that case you just out to stop watching them as long as your with her. if she makes u happy then clips are just clips. they arent there for you they dont take care of you and they wont offer u a shoulder to cry on. give up the clips and keep the girl if u really love her
 
mtTicklemonster said:
I have a headache that won't go away so maybe I shouldn't say anything, but imma say somethig and might be blunt about it lol

if she's not into them, stop watching them... if she indulges in your fetish why do you need them? She lets you indulge it in real life, no need to watch videos of it happening... you get the real thing.
Click to expand...

Well said. This is like someone owning a Porsche and being upset that there's a scratch on the fender. This shouldn't be an issue at all. Consider yourself lucky that you have a such an understanding and accomodating girlfriend(there are so many women out there who hate tickling, and don't understand our fetish at all). Since she respects your love of tickling, shouldn't you respect her feelings about tickling videos?
 
proud2tickle said:
I agree with Ryan.... i cant believe i am saying this but steve is right on this one. Relationships and love are all about the ability to meet each others needs and understand each other. she may feel insecure about u watch these videos because she feels like she isnt satisfying you enough. in that case you just out to stop watching them as long as your with her. if she makes u happy then clips are just clips. they arent there for you they dont take care of you and they wont offer u a shoulder to cry on. give up the clips and keep the girl if u really love her
Click to expand...

nice to see a couple people agreeing with me that can't believe they're agreeing with me
 
magic fingers said:
Well said. This is like someone owning a Porsche and being upset that there's a scratch on the fender. This shouldn't be an issue at all. Consider yourself lucky that you have a such an understanding and accomodating girlfriend(there are so many women out there who hate tickling, and don't understand our fetish at all). Since she respects your love of tickling, shouldn't you respect her feelings about tickling videos?
Click to expand...

thank you for being the first of the three to agree with me that didn't start with "I can't believe i'm agreeing with him" or whatever lol..
 
mtTicklemonster said:
thank you for being the first of the three to agree with me that didn't start with "I can't believe i'm agreeing with him" or whatever lol..
Click to expand...

Well, now that you mention it, I can't believe I agreed w/you 😛 (sorry, I couldn't resist!)
 
Last edited:
rhiannon said:
One has nothing to do with the other! Masturbation and porn has absolutely nothing to do with how good or bad your sex life is! Sometimes I simply don't feel like going the whole nine yards with foreplay, sex, afterplay...sometimes I just want to watch a tickling clip and masturbate, be done within ten minutes and be left alone! 🙂

It is totally detached from the sex life with my husband, and I dare to say it is exactly the same way for most other people as well.
Click to expand...

I'm on par with this. For some people, it may be that sex is to porn/masturbation as cigarettes are to Nicorette (or however the analogy might apply as far as feeling fulfilled.), but for others, it's more like, "Do I wanna cook a full dinner, or do I just want a quick, greasy burger?" It's ALL enjoyable at some point.
 
Thanks so much!

Hey Guys and Girls,

Sorry, I haven't had a chance to be on all day. I just got through reading everyone's posts. THANKYOU so much for responding. I tend to agree with everyone on some part of their post.

I agree that I should be sensitive to her feelings, and she does mean the world to me. We dated about 2 years ago and just started dating again back in October. We talk about marriage and what our lives would have been like if we stayed together through the past two years. I think the people that said "she is sensitive because she wants to be enough for me" are right. I think that is how she feels too. She wants to fully satisfy my fetish, which she totally does. Not everyday do you find a girl who actually calls me up and tells me she loves me, then says come over so I can tie you up and rub my socks in your face. She knows I like it and probably just wants to make sure that she is satisfying me.

However, I also agree that it isn't really a problem until we get further along. Even though we talk about the future, things can always happen and I can keep them locked up on an external hard drive. She wants to watch them with me so I will let her.

Thanks everyone and you have been very helpful! :thumbsup:
 
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