I will not come out and name anyone in particular in this thread.
I have just arrived back to college from taking a four day trip to Chicago to relax and meet up with online friends. I had been miserable and desperately depressed for months now, and was losing hope that I would ever find people I could relate to in any way. It's not just tickling, but everything else about me.
So I ended up in Chicago last Thursday and napped the whole day. No biggie. The following day I met up with one of my buds and he and I had lunch and hung out together for a while and talked. However, that was cut short because he wanted to take a nap. So I let him be and went, by myself, down to Navy Pier. I remember that I was at the Pier, in the Ferris Wheel, thinking to myself in the Gondola. I was pondering on several sad thoughts, most of which dealt with how I could not be myself, I was destined to be "alone," and how I was just simply too strange and unconventional for most people.
That was about to change.
Yesterday, Saturday, I met up with friend #1 and now with a gal, whom I shall refer to as friend #2. I was nervous. Let me just say I have never before met anyone else who was a tickle enthusiast. No 'lers. No 'lees. And suddenly I was gathered with two fellow TMF members, all around the same age, enjoying a nice conversation over Chinese lunch.
That night all of us went to my hotel room near the O'Hare airport and enjoyed some drinks and had a surprise birthday party for Friend #2. She had no idea it was coming...we had hot chocolate brownie vanilla ice cream sundaes brought to my room to celebrate her early 20th birthday. All was going great and Friend #1 and I even gave Friend #2 a birthday present that we pitched in to buy her. She was thrilled. 🙂
Why do I bring this up and post it in the Tickling Discussion section? Because, and I honestly mean this, that day feels like the first day I have ever been able to be MYSELF and not pretend to be someone else. For the first time in my life I was with people who understood me and did not judge me. I was free to speak my mind, no matter how silly or awkward the thoughts. And yes, there was some tickle play for the birthday girl, for about an hour or two (including some ice play), but that was never the purpose of this trip. Friend #1 and I went to Chicago so that the three of us could meet up before NEST and get to know each other before hand so that we are comfortable with each other and have each other for whatever we need. In other words, to form a friendship and start a significant bond between the three of us.
I have not been this happy for months. I felt like a part of me was reborn and I was able to be free again and just smile. I was so happy with them, so happy to be accepted, so happy to be understood, that I cried. I cried from happiness when I had to say good bye to come back to Virginia. I cried hard and long. But I cried happy tears, tears of an incredibly strong emotional release. Neither of them know about that yet, but I figure they'll find out when they read this post.
You two know who you are. Thank you for being, for lack of a better term, awesome.
I am so ready for NEST. So ready to meet others who I can be myself with. Ready to make life long friends. Ready to smile again and be free.
It's amazing what can happen when you finally take that brave step and venture out into this world to find people like you, people you can associate with, people who love you.
Thank You,
- Chaneda
I have just arrived back to college from taking a four day trip to Chicago to relax and meet up with online friends. I had been miserable and desperately depressed for months now, and was losing hope that I would ever find people I could relate to in any way. It's not just tickling, but everything else about me.
So I ended up in Chicago last Thursday and napped the whole day. No biggie. The following day I met up with one of my buds and he and I had lunch and hung out together for a while and talked. However, that was cut short because he wanted to take a nap. So I let him be and went, by myself, down to Navy Pier. I remember that I was at the Pier, in the Ferris Wheel, thinking to myself in the Gondola. I was pondering on several sad thoughts, most of which dealt with how I could not be myself, I was destined to be "alone," and how I was just simply too strange and unconventional for most people.
That was about to change.
Yesterday, Saturday, I met up with friend #1 and now with a gal, whom I shall refer to as friend #2. I was nervous. Let me just say I have never before met anyone else who was a tickle enthusiast. No 'lers. No 'lees. And suddenly I was gathered with two fellow TMF members, all around the same age, enjoying a nice conversation over Chinese lunch.
That night all of us went to my hotel room near the O'Hare airport and enjoyed some drinks and had a surprise birthday party for Friend #2. She had no idea it was coming...we had hot chocolate brownie vanilla ice cream sundaes brought to my room to celebrate her early 20th birthday. All was going great and Friend #1 and I even gave Friend #2 a birthday present that we pitched in to buy her. She was thrilled. 🙂
Why do I bring this up and post it in the Tickling Discussion section? Because, and I honestly mean this, that day feels like the first day I have ever been able to be MYSELF and not pretend to be someone else. For the first time in my life I was with people who understood me and did not judge me. I was free to speak my mind, no matter how silly or awkward the thoughts. And yes, there was some tickle play for the birthday girl, for about an hour or two (including some ice play), but that was never the purpose of this trip. Friend #1 and I went to Chicago so that the three of us could meet up before NEST and get to know each other before hand so that we are comfortable with each other and have each other for whatever we need. In other words, to form a friendship and start a significant bond between the three of us.
I have not been this happy for months. I felt like a part of me was reborn and I was able to be free again and just smile. I was so happy with them, so happy to be accepted, so happy to be understood, that I cried. I cried from happiness when I had to say good bye to come back to Virginia. I cried hard and long. But I cried happy tears, tears of an incredibly strong emotional release. Neither of them know about that yet, but I figure they'll find out when they read this post.
You two know who you are. Thank you for being, for lack of a better term, awesome.
I am so ready for NEST. So ready to meet others who I can be myself with. Ready to make life long friends. Ready to smile again and be free.
It's amazing what can happen when you finally take that brave step and venture out into this world to find people like you, people you can associate with, people who love you.
Thank You,
- Chaneda
