Advice on instructing a friend on how to enjoy tickling...

[Candygirl]

Ok so first of all, Kenzie is the 2 year girlfriend of a roommate of mine. And we have an open friendship (conversationally) and talk about everything from sex to shoes. So, here's a conversation I had with Kenzie the other day while cleaning the kitchen and the guys were playing xbox:

Kenzie: So, I was browsing the internet the other day to try and find some things to spice up things between Shane and I a bit, and came across this weird article that said it was possible to arouse a girl through tickling. Like, finding secret hot spots by tickling her.

(A LINK to the article so you know what we're talking about. Spot 3 at the bottom, specifically)

Me: Yeah, actually, I read that one months ago. I think. Was it the one talking about the back of the neck and the knees too?

Kenzie: Yeah that one. Do you think it works?

Me: (feeling comfortable enough talking to her, I figured I'd just go all out) It does, actually. The spot behind the knees is incredibly ticklish anyhow. And it turns me on just by a single stroke.

Kenzie: Wait, you get turned on by being tickled? Like how much?

Me: Well, not always turned on. It's different for each person. For me it varies on where I am tickled and by who. It's only a turn on, for me at least, with the right person in a more private setting. Like tied to a bed kinda thing. Mostly it's just playful fun.

Kenzie: Wait, for you? There's other people that like it? Like...it's a thing?

Me: Haha, yes it's "a thing". There's literally hundreds of thousands of people who enjoy either tickling or being tickled. But again, it varies with each person.

Kenzie: Well, I know I'm ticklish. But how do I know if I like, enjoy it like that?

It was then that Shane came in to get her as they were heading to her house for the night, and she asked if we could continue talking about it later.




My question is, I guess for me it's one of those "You know or you don't" kinda things. I don't know how to explain to her whether she would "like" being tickled as opposed to just being ticklish. So first off, how would I explain that to her, and if she wants to go through with the idea of something with her boyfriend, how would she bring it up or get him to try something?

 

[scorpionldr]

Well my girlfriend doesn't really like tickling (that's what she says but that's not what it looks like to me lol....). When I met her I just gave gentle tickles. She was even ticklish along her forearm so I started working from there. Then to up the arms, around the sides, and eventually to the stomach. SOFT so she could get used to it and then I just kept working her lol.

Then we found extra credit spots I shouldn't mention. But that's basically it. Don't tickle like some rough wild ape and she might respect you forit.

 

[JoePTickle]

Thanks for the story, firstly. I agree with you, if you know you're ticklish, it seems likely that you already would know if you liked it at all, let alone to be arousing. Add in the uncertainty of whether Kenzie's boyfriend has any interest... the odds seem long. With that said, unless she was interested in being tickled by you a little to see if she likes it, she could just bring up the article with Shane in the same way that she did with you, unless the need to spice things up is more of a deep problem than just a creative idea.

 

[longstory]

I agree.

 

[deadlywiffeathr]

Basically I think she just needs to have it pointed out to her that tickling can actually be a sensual and gentle experience. It sounds like the image of tickling she has built up in her mind is the intense, hard type of tickling most people engage in out of the bedroom for fun. Maybe suggest the 'blindfold and feathers' route and see what she says 😀

 

[iloveddub]

See, on the flip side I HATE light tickling with feathers and things. It's just not my" thing". I like it rougher, more intentional, and intense. Maybe try a variety of touches, keep it short, no bondage, and give her a chance. Accept no if it's no. Like Joe P said, usually if you like it, you already know that. Good luck!

 

[robmic]

To be perfectly honest here, I think that unless she were introduced to it by someone that knows how to instigate the right responses by tickling, (i.e., someone that she's intimate with), she may not experience what we do from being tickled. It would be a crap-shoot at best whether or not she has a positive reaction to it. Even those of us that hold tickling near and dear aren't always successful passing on our feelings towards it and how you can benefit from tickling or being tickled. About all you can do is try to always convey tickling in a positive manner and hope for the best.