Another personal thread that people don't want to read.

[Leo tickles]

Courtney and I have just broken up again for the third time.

And it blows as much fucking cock as it did the first two times.

The end.

 

[Mitchell]

Leo, I don't want to say too much publicly, except that I'm sorry to hear about Courtney and you breaking up. As you know, I pmed you in more detail. If you need me, my pm box is open anytime.

Take it easy, my friend,
Mitch

 

[maniactickler]

Lets hope it actually is the end with her! move on!

 

[Mitchell]

maniac has very sound advice. While that is practical advice, for the head, as we both know, maniac, the heart doesn't always follow the head. Hopefully, for Leo's sake, he can go through his period of getting over her, and move on to the much kinder girl he really deserves.

Mitch

 

[unclebill]

Forget about her, and get a puppy. They are so much easier to train than a woman.

 

[kis123]

Forget about her, and get a puppy. They are so much easier to train than a woman.

Better yet, get a kitty; they're nowhere as needy as puppies......or men at that matter.

Leo, I'm going with maniac on this one. The best advice is to close the door and leave it shut. When it comes to relationships, I call it the "if only" factor. If you can love that person regardless if they never change that behavior you find unacceptable, then stay. If not and you find yourself saying "if only" to any of it, it's time to let her go.

I wish you well.

 

[Leo tickles]

I'm trying to figure out how to get over all of it right now.

And how does one clearly tell they are over something like this?

The only what if I wonder, is what if she weren't so heartless and cold.

 

[GQguy]

For me, it's when I realize that i'm attracting/with a higher quality woman than I was with before. When you're over yor ex you take off the rose colored glasses and see them for what they really are. Typically I start having lots of fn again and I could not imagine going back.

The most awesome part about break ups IME is that you end up getting more love and attention in the end because you're not focused on a girl. You get to focus 100% on yourself. I use this to better myself by:working out, reading, making new friends, get new style, focus on school, date new women, going on FUN trips ect. I've always ended up on top. Think about all that money you spent picking up the tab, gifts ect....you can focus that all on yourself! That effort for a Christmas present....can now be spent on a fun New Years. That effort for Valentines day...can now be spent on a Spring Break trip with your boys. Oh...and you get your boys back!

GQ

 

[Helena]

For me, it's when I realize that i'm attracting/with a higher quality woman than I was with before. When you're over yor ex you take off the rose colored glasses and see them for what they really are. Typically I start having lots of fn again and I could not imagine going back.

The most awesome part about break ups IME is that you end up getting more love and attention in the end because you're not focused on a girl. You get to focus 100% on yourself. I use this to better myself by:working out, reading, making new friends, get new style, focus on school, date new women, going on FUN trips ect. I've always ended up on top. Think about all that money you spent picking up the tab, gifts ect....you can focus that all on yourself! That effort for a Christmas present....can now be spent on a fun New Years. That effort for Valentines day...can now be spent on a Spring Break trip with your boys. Oh...and you get your boys back!

GQ

I like the way your mind thinks about saving money. Not having to pick up the check for a date with a woman you don't really like anymore is a great way to look at things. Dating is soooo expensive.
What better way to spend your hard earned money than on yourself.

It's wonderful that you always come out on top.

 

[Leo tickles]

Yeah, extra cash is good, but I don't care about money like most people do.

I want to spend it on somebody if it makes them happy, and either way, that's not why she was with me. She didn't care about gifts.

It's just shit, this whole situation. I honestly want to type out a whole book about what happened, but I'm tired. Not sleepy tired, I slept. Not crying tired, I cried.

I'm just mentally tired. Not shutting down, but feeling everything that I have been over the past couple of months. I want to take time and recover. And that's good, because that's what I have to do.

The only question that I've been asking everybody is: how do you know when you are over it?

 

[GQguy]

Yeah, extra cash is good, but I don't care about money like most people do.

I want to spend it on somebody if it makes them happy, and either way, that's not why she was with me. She didn't care about gifts.

It's just shit, this whole situation. I honestly want to type out a whole book about what happened, but I'm tired. Not sleepy tired, I slept. Not crying tired, I cried.

I'm just mentally tired. Not shutting down, but feeling everything that I have been over the past couple of months. I want to take time and recover. And that's good, because that's what I have to do.

The only question that I've been asking everybody is: how do you know when you are over it?

Lol. I don't mind paying for dates. I actually prefer it. I loved taking my girls out till the last day we speak. I'm a true romantic.

While money is nice...that wasn't my point. I feel as though when most people are in a serious relationship they become stagnant in who they are. They may evolve as a couple....kids...house...ect. But they nolonger work on themselves. They don't grow. No new hobbies/friends ect. No new challenges. Or at least not as many as one could find being single. Even going back to school can bring stress to a relationship. I feel it even now as I'm in a relationship. Instead of fixing what is wrong with you as a person you spend lots of time working on the relationship. By being single you can refocus that effort back to yourself.

Example...the last gf I was with didn't want me to be a military pilot. At the time I was FAR away from making that goal happen. If things had worked out I wouuld have given up that goal to be with her. Thank God it didn't! And now i've been accepted as a military aviator 3 years later and having the time of my life. I'm simply a better man now than I was 3 years ago. And a much better man than I would have been had we stayed together. Ironically i'd be a mch better boyfriend now than I was back then. She'd be VERY impressed. But the real question would be ....would she impress me seeing as my standards have gone up along with everything else. That's where you want to be.

Take care of yourself. Experience the world(when was your last trip? Go!). Hang with your boys. Develop yourself. Figure out what went wrong and learn from it. Make a better relationship for the next girl. Make new, better quality friends that make you a better man(Do you know any quality guys that you admire? Find them and live like them).

GQ

 

[Knox The Hatter]

Leo, if a fourth opportunity arises, say this to yourself: the definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting a different result.

Move on.

 

[Leo tickles]

I personally think that one of the major points in a relationship is to grow and learn together, about ourselves, about our partners, about life. I know a lot of people say that, but don't do it. I usually try my best to, and I expect my partner too, also.

Knox, that's probably the best thing anybody could say to me right now.

Here's a detail of our break up, and, in my mind, the only one that matters.

"I don't love you, I can't see myself marrying you or having kids with you, stop talking and trying to make me cry, I'm not the one that's hurt".

That's what she said to me. Some love, eh? And still, it hurts like a fuck. Not because of the words, but because of who they were coming from.

 

[kis123]

Here's a detail of our break up, and, in my mind, the only one that matters.

"I don't love you, I can't see myself marrying you or having kids with you, stop talking and trying to make me cry, I'm not the one that's hurt".

It might not be over for you but it is certainly over for her. Deal with your pain, and shut the door on that woman. Don't take a phone call, email, text message, letter by carrier pigeon.......nothing else from her. She said it's over for her, then it's over Leo. There is no comeback in the future when she grows up and realizes she screwed up or when some man she falls hard for treats her like dirt. It's done and dead......leave it there and deal with your issues as you see fit as long as you're making progress.

That's what she said to me. Some love, eh? And still, it hurts like a fuck. Not because of the words, but because of who they were coming from.

Of course it hurts Leo and it's going to hurt for some time. It's what you do with it that'll measure growth vs. immaturity. GQ guy has lots of ideas to handle some of your pain and help you move forward, I suggest you try some of them. Getting away for a weekend here and there sounds like a great idea. Just do you for a little while; work on self during this time and don't sweat the small stuff or worry about her because she sure ain't concerning herself with you.

 

[Babbles]

Yes, it sounds like she made it "easier" for you in a way, she was cold and to the point about it. It still hurts, and that's still fresh
but at least you're not being strung along or left wondering...

This is where the expression "being cruel to be kind" comes in,
(though it doesn't sound like she was going out of her way to be kind either )
when someone's that abrupt & unfeeling about it you don't need to worry about having lost someone especially nice or worthwhile
and hopefully it'll be easier to move on after the initial shock.

And you're obviously much better off....

 

[Leo tickles]

Well that's the thing.

After our 2 year history and her getting back together with me 3 weeks before doing this, I was under the impression that she did love me.

I suppose I was/am still in a state of shock. Looking back to yesterday, it's good, the way she put it.

It just still sucks.

 

[april]

My heart goes out to you. It is only too obviouse that your in pain and although there is a lot of sound advice in this thread, your heart is not ready to hear it. What you should do is talk about this to anyone willing to listen untill your sick of talking about it. Get it all out and then some. The healing will start to happen and your thinking process on this matter will start to change, not in a day or maybe not in a week but eventually. Put yourself first by loving yourself and know that you deserve a girl so much better than that other chic.

 

[Leo tickles]

I dunno, I think I'm ready to hear and take the advice I see here and elsewhere.

I'm not in denial. It's just a sucky feeling, but even after it hit, I knew life had to go on. But I knew that I had to cry and hurt for a while before it did so.

First couple of times, I just said fuck it and moved on. This time around, I'm going to heal. Not only so I can feel better, but so I can give a girl that deserves it everything I have to offer, which was the goal in the first place.

Not to say I'll quit spending time with females, however. They all know I want nothing more than somebody to bitch to. And whether it's my charming personality or my long hair, they're okay with that. And I don't care to know why at the moment.

 

[april]

I dunno, I think I'm ready to hear and take the advice I see here and elsewhere.

I'm not in denial. It's just a sucky feeling, but even after it hit, I knew life had to go on. But I knew that I had to cry and hurt for a while before it did so.

First couple of times, I just said fuck it and moved on. This time around, I'm going to heal. Not only so I can feel better, but so I can give a girl that deserves it everything I have to offer, which was the goal in the first place.

Not to say I'll quit spending time with females, however. They all know I want nothing more than somebody to bitch to. And whether it's my charming personality or my long hair, they're okay with that. And I don't care to know why at the moment.

Oh, I wasnt suggesting you are in denial at all. Its just I know that emmotions cannot be turned on and off like a switch and being in a similar situation in my past, I understand that you need to heal at your own pace. And sometimes even the best advice is difficult to objectively take to heart; kinda like how love is blind. You seam to be a really nice guy with some rare qualities. Im sorry your going through this.

 

[Banshee]

Uh Man Up

Grow up. Honestly I don't think this girl even exists, or more correctly he was ever with her.

 

[Babbles]

Grow up. Honestly I don't think this girl even exists, or more correctly he was ever with her.

I don't think this troll actually exists, I think he's just a lower form of annoying alien virus sent to invade harmless threads 😛

And yes, I'm very sorry it still sucks, or they do --- It'd be ideal if the trolls would attract the insensitive gfs instead, sparing the rest of the population...

 

[Comfort Eagle]

I don't think this troll actually exists, I think he's just a lower form of annoying alien virus sent to invade harmless threads 😛

...

Woooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooow...

But anyway yeah lol @ OP.

 

[sole seeker]

Looks to me like you exist. Been on the forum for several years. Got over 1000 posts.


Anyway - assuming this is for real... The situation does suck. No doubt about it. Been there, done that, got the T-shirt.

Time will heal it. Just hang in there.

Try doing something for other people. If you live in an urban area there's bound to be a shelter feeding homeless people. The local ASPCA probably needs help working around the animal shelter. All of these projects get more than enough volunteers around the holidays (when lots of people feel depressed), but right now some of these projects might need some help. You'll probably feel better if you do.

 

[Leo tickles]

Two of the brightest people on the forum have posted, Eagle and Banshee.

I can sleep well tonight.

 

[Comfort Eagle]

You know you've posted some weird ass shit across the internet, Leo.

Perhaps you need to reconsider how open you are to strangers online.