anybody else hate this thing called "love"

[AffectionateDan]

and be yourself!

Go up and talk to her. Talk to her like you've known her for years. Just do it.

Sound advice! Just relax. Self-confidence is one of the most attractive qualities a person can have, no matter what their gender. Just be true to yourself, and if she's attracted to you as you really are, then you're all set. If she's not, then would you rather pretend to be someone you're not whenever she's around? Just act like it's not a big deal, and if it's right, everything will fall into place without the need for pretenses.

And good luck!

I remember that song. From that 80s opera-singer-turned-rocker Pat Benadryl, wasn't it?

How about Nazareth's "Love Hurts"?
The Beatles "All You Need Is Love"
And finally, John Patrick's "Love Is a Many Splendored Thing"

I can't believe I beat you to adding The J. Geils Band "Love Stinks"! 🙄

 

[drew70]

It's my old age creepin in, Danny! Slowing down as time goes on 😀

Back to the topic, I've given a lot of thought to love over the years. It's a word that encompasses a lot of different feelings and emotions. For me, my love for my wife is not really about lust, or possession, or even trust. It's about knowing each other so well. Our strengths and our faults, and yet still wanting to be with no other. It's about a sense of things as they should be when we're together. And keeping the other first and foremost in all concerns. Most of all, it's about being ourselves and accepting the other with all the good and bad.

 

[Ethical Edward]

It's my old age creepin in, Danny! Slowing down as time goes on 😀

Back to the topic, I've given a lot of thought to love over the years. It's a word that encompasses a lot of different feelings and emotions. For me, my love for my wife is not really about lust, or possession, or even trust. It's about knowing each other so well. Our strengths and our faults, and yet still wanting to be with no other. It's about a sense of things as they should be when we're together. And keeping the other first and foremost in all concerns. Most of all, it's about being ourselves and accepting the other with all the good and bad.

That's a very rare thing you have there. I thought last year at this time I was going to have the same thing...I was wrong.

 

[Ticklerguy4u]

Well, first thing to do dude is..

Knock her off that pedestal you have her on. The reason a person is nervous to talk to another person is because we place that person on a pedestal higher then us. Will they like me? What if they don't. blah blah blah...(not to be so blunt)

Once you do that..then you will see that talking to her is no big deal because then it becomes the matter of what truly matters is..can you have a friendship of common interest. You may find that although physically she is attractive to you..her personality doesn't mesh with yours. If it does..then you are half way there..either way, you come off as confident in yourself and she will not see you as the weirdo you think. Women have just as much insecurities, yes even the attractive ones.

 

[kis123]

You can chose to believe me or not, but I really do not have any "sexual" thoughts regarding her, yet anyways. I just want to talk to her first, find out if she is a good person or a bitch, and then see what happens. But it's the "first contact" I'm worried about...

If you're talking about a relationship with a woman, you'll be talking about sex at some point-don't kid yourself. Besides, my comment about sex didn't just apply to your situation, trust me.

She's just another woman and no one to be afraid of. What's the worst she'll do? Tell you "no"? If that's your worst fear I just don't know what to say. You can live in the land of "what if" and "coulda' woulda' shoulda'" or you can bring closure to your thoughts. Who knows, you might make a new girlfriend, friend, acquaintance.

I hope you get past your fears and step up to the plate. You won't know anything until you do.

 

[SemoreBellys]

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[GirlWhoLikes2Laugh]

I've got to say just talk to her and be yourself. Take a chance, you never know she may like you or not. If she doesn't it's her loss and move on. I personally don't believe in this love at first sight crap because that's what it is, crap. I believe that you can be attracted to someone but it takes time to get to know them and then love hopefully will grow from the relationship.

 

[Illtcklu]

I've got to say just talk to her and be yourself. Take a chance, you never know she may like you or not. If she doesn't it's her loss and move on. I personally don't believe in this love at first sight crap because that's what it is, crap. I believe that you can be attracted to someone but it takes time to get to know them and then love hopefully will grow from the relationship.

First off HEY JEN!!!!! And second I agree with you, always be yourself!!!!!!!

 

[GirlWhoLikes2Laugh]

I am so glad we agree Illtcklu. How are you doing? Hopefully we'll meet in person someday.

 

[Illtcklu]

I am so glad we agree Illtcklu. How are you doing? Hopefully we'll meet in person someday.

I hope so too........

Back to the thread, I hope you find true love someday! If you do you'll realize it's worth it!!!

 

[kis123]

Question: I think I would be better off (less stressful) if she wasn't with anyone with I first talk to her, all I need is a bunch of other eyes on me practically saying who the hell is this guy. Anyone agree?

Since you want advice, here's a suggestion:

The next time you see her, take a deep breath and move! Just move towards her-don't think, don't do anything else.....just move! When you reach her, draw another deep breath and behave normally. Talk about running and ask if she'd like some company on a run. From there, ask about coffee-college students LOVE coffee! Take her for a coffee after the run and just relax and let things progress naturally.

You know that you've turned a molehill into a mountain with this right? Just relax and be natural. Make it when she's alone; you don't need a public display at this point.

Get this over with for crying out loud!!! And remember to relax and enjoy. I wish you the best and look forward to the report.

 

[Ethical Edward]

I hope so too........

Back to the thread, I hope you find true love someday! If you do you'll realize it's worth it!!!

Indeed it is worth it, but I lost mine and now the great creator has me branded as...The Forsaken.

 

[Ticklerguy4u]

Ditto Kis 🙂

Question: I think I would be better off (less stressful) if she wasn't with anyone with I first talk to her, all I need is a bunch of other eyes on me practically saying who the hell is this guy. Anyone agree?

Worst thing to do is never be a fortune teller meaning don't tell the future before it happens. You'll wind up confusing yourself...she will say something you are totally unprepared for and fumble your words out.

Just treat her like you would a woman who you aren't attracted to or if she were a guy.

 

[kis123]

Sorry folks, but I can't take it anymore!

Indeed it is worth it, but I lost mine and now the great creator has me branded as...The Forsaken.

How long has it been since this break up? Several months? A year? Let's face it Edward, however long it's been, it's time for you to stop wallowing in it and move on!

I don't think there is one person on this entire forum that hasn't been taken advantage of, used, abused, dumped by someone they once loved. You are not the first and won't be the last. Learn from her mistakes and your mistakes and move on. At the rate you're going, we'll be hearing about Tanya five years from now and you will be in the same place while she's gotten on with her life.

I hope you're listening-it's time out for the pity party and time to push yourself forward.

Solrry folks I didn't mean to go off topic but this has been going on for months and someone needed to say it.

 

[911]

I wouldn't exactly say that. Sure, it sucks most of the time. It sucks hard. A lot of the time, it turns out not to be real and someone gets hurt badly in the process. Still, there is happiness in love. I know, I've seen it. Not personally, of course, but I've seen people who are truly in love. That's one reason that I keep my head up high, because I know that if I have faith in myself I'll have that someday as well.

That sounds very opptummistic I wish I felt the way you do, when I see people in love it makes me want to fucking hurl but that's probley because I'm a bitter lonely soul if someone loved me back I guess that would be good, but that's a big if. Unless that happens I stick to love equals depression, suicidal thoughts, low self-esteem, and anger, since those are bad things I don't like love.

 

[SemoreBellys]

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[SemoreBellys]

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[OnnaOtaku]

Start small.

This is a little cheesey, but it's so cheesy it might just work!

Ask for a pen, even if you already have one. The next day or so, ask for another one and say something else with it, like, "I am always forgetting or losing my pens!". Then wait a bit, ask for one again. This way you break the ice a little and give her a chance to converse back, and also, she remembers you after class is over and you can judge her reactions everytime you ask for one so that you know if you're wasting your time. Eventually, just start talking to her about obvious things, like what's going on, ask for a good place to get some food or something. After you're confortable enough and have had some short, two-sided conversations, ask her to get coffee or something sometime.

Just take baby steps.

 

[SemoreBellys]

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[SemoreBellys]

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[Ethical Edward]

How long has it been since this break up? Several months? A year? Let's face it Edward, however long it's been, it's time for you to stop wallowing in it and move on!

I don't think there is one person on this entire forum that hasn't been taken advantage of, used, abused, dumped by someone they once loved. You are not the first and won't be the last. Learn from her mistakes and your mistakes and move on. At the rate you're going, we'll be hearing about Tanya five years from now and you will be in the same place while she's gotten on with her life.

I hope you're listening-it's time out for the pity party and time to push yourself forward.

Solrry folks I didn't mean to go off topic but this has been going on for months and someone needed to say it.

Sorry to go off topic and I know what kis is trying to do and that's help but it's just that good things never happen to me. In fact that was the only good thing that I think ever happened to me and that was 1 year ago exactly. Sometimes it takes longer than a few months to get over something special. Sometimes you never get over it.

 

[kis123]

Sorry to go off topic and I know what kis is trying to do and that's help but it's just that good things never happen to me. In fact that was the only good thing that I think ever happened to me and that was 1 year ago exactly. Sometimes it takes longer than a few months to get over something special. Sometimes you never get over it.

I didn't tell you to get over it-I told you it's time to get out of your pity-pit and move on!

I feel the stiing of past relationships all of the time. A couple of the guys involved have been dead for years-it still hurts from time to time. But you better believe I've moved on. I was married for 10 years and left that marriage with my two kids in tow and nothing else. Think that didn't hurt? Sure it did, but you better believe I've moved on.

That relationship obviously wasn't meant to last so get up and start moving on! I and many members of this forum are expecting you to progress and five years from now hope Tanya will be a very distant memory.

Now if you want to eat your soul out over this for years, be my guest! But it's not going to bring her back and no woman is going to want to deal with your ex-files.

 

[Ethical Edward]

I didn't tell you to get over it-I told you it's time to get out of your pity-pit and move on!

I feel the stiing of past relationships all of the time. A couple of the guys involved have been dead for years-it still hurts from time to time. But you better believe I've moved on. I was married for 10 years and left that marriage with my two kids in tow and nothing else. Think that didn't hurt? Sure it did, but you better believe I've moved on.

That relationship obviously wasn't meant to last so get up and start moving on! I and many members of this forum are expecting you to progress and five years from now hope Tanya will be a very distant memory.

Now if you want to eat your soul out over this for years, be my guest! But it's not going to bring her back and no woman is going to want to deal with your ex-files.

I know, you're right of course it's just these holidays this year get me down. I also lost my father along with my girlfriend so you have to factor that in. Sometimes lately i'm charming, smooth yet sincere when talking to girls and other times I just feel lost.

 

[The Sean Man]

I didn't tell you to get over it-I told you it's time to get out of your pity-pit and move on!

I feel the stiing of past relationships all of the time. A couple of the guys involved have been dead for years-it still hurts from time to time. But you better believe I've moved on. I was married for 10 years and left that marriage with my two kids in tow and nothing else. Think that didn't hurt? Sure it did, but you better believe I've moved on.

That relationship obviously wasn't meant to last so get up and start moving on! I and many members of this forum are expecting you to progress and five years from now hope Tanya will be a very distant memory.

Now if you want to eat your soul out over this for years, be my guest! But it's not going to bring her back and no woman is going to want to deal with your ex-files.

I have to agree. It's over and, not to sound cold, you have to move on. Constantly going over it is going to eat you whole.

 

[SemoreBellys]

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