California (joke)

[steph]

So as not to be outdone by all the redneck, hillbilly, and Texan jokes:

You know you're from California if:

1. Your coworker has 8 body piercings and none are visible.

2. You make over $300,000 and still can't afford a house.

3. You take a bus and are shocked at two people carrying on a
conversation
in English.

4. Your child's 3rd-grade teacher has purple hair, a nose ring, and is
named Flower.

5. You can't remember . . . . . is pot illegal?

6. You've been to a baby shower that has two mothers and a sperm donor.

7. You have a very strong opinion about where your coffee beans are
grown,
and you can taste the difference between Sumatran and Ethiopian.

8. You can't remember . . . is pot illegal?

9. A really great parking space can totally move you to tears.

10. Gas costs $1.00 per gallon more than anywhere else in the U.S.

11. Unlike back home, the guy at 8:30 am at Starbucks wearing a
baseball
cap and sunglasses who looks like George Clooney really IS George
Clooney.

12. Your car insurance costs as much as your house payment.

13. You can't remember . . . .is pot illegal?

14. It's barely sprinkling rain and there's a report on every news
station:
"STORM WATCH."

15. You pass an elementary school playground and the children are all
busy
with their cells or pagers.

16. It's barely sprinkling rain outside, so you leave for work an hour
early to avoid all the weather-related accidents.

17. HEY!!!! Is pot illegal????

18. Both you AND your dog have therapists.

19. The Terminator is your governor.

20. If you drive illegally, they take your driver's license. If you're
here
illegally, they want to give you one.

 

[milagros317]

LMAO 😛
Very funny, Steph. 😀

 

[steph]

😀 😀 😀

 

[ticklingfeet4fu]

Oh Steph you are extremely funny. That was terrific. That was really good. where do you get your material anyway?

 

[TKpervert]

Looks like you got us weirdo Californians figured out !

oh wait... you're a Californian too...
so you know that's all true.

 

[steph]

I thank you ticklingft4~ Well, you know how everyone has a couple of "things" unique just to you?? Well, one of mine is being funny. 😀 (My pop got transferred a lot when I was a kid and I learned fast if you could make people laugh, they were less likely to beat the crap out of you.) Also, I think I just got lucky, because apparently I was funny as a baby too (you should hear the stories my folks tell people to this day...)🙄 God.
I went to 4 different high schools and was voted "class clown" at 3.
My own life (and even the job I have today) has been laced with tragedy and I use humor as means to cope. But I'm also lucky enough to have fantastically funny friends as well. My material comes from all over the globe! So glad you enjoyed!😛

Oh TKperv! Your posts always make me smile!
XOXO

 

[ticklingfeet4fu]

I was voted clas clown too. But for reasons I won't go into.

 

[Knox The Hatter]

21. When you die, your remains can be handled by a mortuary where your relatives can drive through to have a look at you.