Can this fetish be "unleashed" in someone or can it only be innate?

[CuteJill143]

I met my guy on an internet dating site. (A vanilla one). The first time we started talking through text we got into a conversation about foot massages and he started saying that they tickle and he said how ticklish he was was and even gave away some spots without me having to ask. In the back of my mind, I knew he sounded promising. I teased back saying that was the worst thing he could have told me and left it at that. There was no need to tell him right away before we had even had our first date. I later found out that he practically had everything else in common too.

The first time we were cuddling/wrestling on his bed and I went to tickle his sides and he told me not to do that because it turned him on too much and being tickled made him want to rip my clothes off. I knew that if I told him that I loved tickling too I would have a positive reaction. I had never been happier to tell a guy whom I was dating how much I enjoyed it too. I had no doubt in my mind whatsoever.

My boyfriend said that him being tickled always turned him on but he never knew it could be explored as a fetish until he met me and I talked about it to him. He has never experienced tickling in the ways that I described to him and he was intrigued. At first he was a bit shy about it and didn't mention it for a while after I admitted to him that it turns me on too. He eventually came around on his own when he brought it up to me on his own one night while we were watching TV and said that that he wanted to explore the tickling more. I knew he was sincere and not just trying to humor me. He told me that we needed feathers and restraints and a blindfold 😀. He did some research on tickling to learn what to do. After the first time I restrained him with belts and tickled him he was addicted, he then ordered under the bed restraints to try which haven't came yet. At first I was afraid that he was strictly a LEE but he really does love tickling me too. Lately hes been pinning me down and tickling me and it drives him crazy when he gets that control, teases me and hears me laugh and sees my squirm.

He jokingly says that because of me he now has "a major tickle problem" and he thinks he likes it more than I do now if that's even possible. He is so addicted to me tickling him and him tickling me, its incredible.
Was this potential deep down inside of him that I coincidentally activated or unleashed or just simply "got him into it" or was this with him all along the way it has been with me? Is it possible for somebody to learn to like tickling from their partner and then all of a sudden develop a full blown fetish after trying it? or is a fetish "genetic" or innate (Something people are both with?)

I felt that with me, my fetish for tickling is innate. With my boyfriend I am not too sure but all I know is that this is great that I have someone like him.

Either way does not matter to me since my partner is officially into it! woo hoo!!

 

[anderson1129]

Sounds like you're one of the lucky ones. I have to imagine your bf had to always have those feelings for tickling. It's just something I believe you are born with. Once he realized that you were into it too he may have been more comfortable exploring it. Lucky for you.

 

[CuteJill143]

True, but he doesn't know about things like TMF or NEST. I've known about those things since I've been too young to join this forum. I was 11 turning 12 when I had my first computer with dial up and discovered the forum. I'm 26 and hes 28. He's no prude but there's also a lot he hasn't tried (As far as he's told me anyway)

 

[anderson1129]

Hmm. I guess everyone is different. I was similar to you though. I discovered the forum when I was prob early teens. It wasn't til last month that I finally joined. I guess it is just my experience but I was shy and a little embarrassed about the fetish. Seems like he is much more open though. Don't think I could ever talk to a gf about it.

 

[robmic]

Ya know what? It really doesn't matter. You've reached a pinnacle that many will never reach. You've hooked up with someone that loves tickling as much as you! Enjoy it and everything that comes with it! Concentrate on other things that make a relationship work and enjoy each other for many years to come!

 

[tommytikl]

Enjoy the ride! Woohoo indeed!

 

[Skipadeedoodah]

It sounds like in his particular case tickling always turned him on, but I don't think that has to be the case. I'm exploring tickling with someone who isn't vanilla, but never gave tickling a second thought outside of little flirty pokes and/or being playful with kids. But once we explored it together and he was able to look at it from a different point of view, it became something that really turns him on. I don't think it was already there in him. It's just something he found he can enjoy through someone else who enjoys it - ya know? If someone leads you down an exciting path, you can find yourself liking all kinds of things you never gave a second thought to previously and had no predisposition to enjoy.

 

[ticklishdanny]

My girlfriend asked what turns me on, I told her tickling and now we tickle each other every chance we get 🙂

 

[deadlywiffeathr]

I don't think fetishism is ever "innate", thats reserved for something more like the hunger drive or survival instinct. But i do believe he already had a predisposition to tickling. It sounds like he liked the idea of it before you two ever became a couple, he's just fully exploring it with you now 🙂

A wide array of factors from early life affect our adult sexual behaviours. I wouldn't say he/we are born with it though.

 

[DanishTickling]

These questions lead to a more general discussion than you and your boyfriends situation: Whether fetish is genetically-determined or environmentally-determined?
This has been discussed many times before, and even though many people (and scientists!) have thought of many good reasons to believe both things, we still don't have any scientific evidence that can tell us the right answer.
I personally think it's a complex mix of genes and environment. However I find it hard to believe that a person can "develope" a fetish.

 

[b0xr]

These questions lead to a more general discussion than you and your boyfriends situation: Whether fetish is genetically-determined or environmentally-determined?
This has been discussed many times before, and even though many people (and scientists!) have thought of many good reasons to believe both things, we still don't have any scientific evidence that can tell us the right answer.
I personally think it's a complex mix of genes and environment. However I find it hard to believe that a person can "develope" a fetish.

A person CAN develope a tickling fetish. I know that for a fact. I've been married to my wife for almost 30 years and she never had a tickling fetish before we met, or while we dated. I started tickling her before sex and she started to enjoy having her feet tickled lightly. As things progressed, I started tickling her ribs a little during sex, poked her sides here and there, just quick tickles. After years of this the tickling became more involved in our love making. NOW she is a ticklee...albeit not always into it like I am, but it does turn her on sexually. The more I tickle her, the wetter she gets. And her orgasms are definitly more intense too. I tickle her all the time and it's mostly playfull tickles but when I do tickle her she starts to think about having sex. It has become our foreplay. She always blames me for her new found like for being tickled. She says I turned ger into a pervert...to which I reply...But you are sooo wet from it, that makes you a perv too. I guess we're just a couple of pervs that enjoy some kinky fun.