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Curroupt a Wish

Granted, but pay scales stay the same and you can no longer afford your bills and you become a crazy bag lady pushing a shopping cart full of old shoes and used diapers.


I wish I was independantly wealthy.
 
Granted, but you lost your money independently with Madoff.

I wish I could learn to get to sleep earlier.
 
Granted but you have sacrificed your bed for the floor. (so lame I SUCK) *facepalm*

I wish to live in another state
 
Granted, you now live permanently in a state of confusion.

I wish I didn't have work tomorrow.
 
Granted, your house is buried under 20 feet of snow and after 2 weeks of being trapped, you're forced to eat your own leg to survive.


I wish I had some better ideas.
 
Granted, but you forget them as soon as you think of them. Age is taking its toll 🙂

I wish I had my own car
 
Granted, it will never rain again! Enjoy your water shortage and forest fires.

I wish I had a pizza
 
Granted....one Marshmallow and M&M pizza coming right up!



I wish I never tried using a lightsaber to scratch my back....
 
Granted, you used a chainsaw instead

I wish I was asleep right now
 
Granted, you receive a lifetime supply of sleeping pills. Just don't take too many of them at one time and O D.




I wish that it would warm up around here.
 
Granted. Your bedroom is warm. The rest of the county, however, is below zero.

I wish I had some ice cream.
 
Granted, but as soon as you go to take a bite, it falls into the dirt.


I wish I had a tasty supper right now.
 
Granted. But you just had a root canal and can't even think about chewing without your coinpurse scrunching up.


I wish I had a Pink Iguana.
 
Granted. But instead of the sweet, frosty kinda Pop-Tarts, you get the creepy, stalky Internet kinda poptarts. :sarcasm:


I wish I could become invisible at will, and turn back again at will.
 
Granted. You fall over in the bathroom and are in a coma for the rest of your life.


I wish I could go to the munch in NYC
 
Granted. But no one else turns up.

I wish I had the power to make people orgasm just by touching them.
 
Granted, but it's been cursed by a voodoo priestess and upon eating it, makes your head shrink to the size of a walnut.


I wish Jo would win her wager so she can post again.
 
Granted, but the voodoo priestess has made it with a zombie turkey that chases you everywhere you go.


I wish people would just accept that the Steelers are the best team in football history.
 
sorry, can't grant that one...maybe in another life

i wish people would accept the fact that Dallas is America's Team
 
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