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Curroupt a Wish

Granted it is made of the sweet and sour chicken that you puked up after getting food poisoning.


I wish that people would explain to me why the do the things they do.
 
Granted as they explain their tar and feathering you for the way you answered that last wish

I wish I was a body builder
 
Your wish is my command... but as your muscles grow your income shrinks

I wish I could be 10 years younger
 
Granted but for every year younger you get your ears and nose get bigger so you look like a freak.

I wish I had a beautiful woman into tickling madly in love with me.
 
She's all yours... but she is blind, deaf, mute and has to be back to the center for the mentally ill each night by 7pm.

I wish I could have dinner with my favorite movie star.
 
granted but a jealous groupie comes in and dumps ice water on your head and the stars phone rings with an emergency and they leave.

I wish I was 35 again
 
Poof! You're 35...

But now you're a cop again... in the middle of a drug bust... someone knocks over a mirror of cocaine which fills the air with dust and you fail the next piss test and the only job you can find is a garbage collector.

*whew* that was long.

I wish I had a transporter that would take me anywhere I wanted.
 
granted but it malfunctions and sends you into a garbage bin where I place you in the back of the truch for messing my wish up so bad.

I wish I had a BMW brand new
 
MasterPaladin said:
granted but it malfunctions and sends you into a garbage bin where I place you in the back of the truch for messing my wish up so bad.
Click to expand...

LMAO!!! BUt ya gotta admit... it was creative!!!

Okay... here's your BMW... brand new...

But it turns out to be stolen from a car lot and you get put in jail for receiving stolen goods!

I wish I could win a vacation to Australia
 
granted but it's a one way trip and your broke and left your pc at home.

yaaaaaaa the last word is mine

I wish I had a harley
 
Poof! You have a Harley...

But while riding you piss off a herd of Hell's Angels and they beat you with it.

I wish I had a boat
 
Granted...

But you get tied down and tickled and while they are tickling you, there's a fire and they all run out of the building and leave you to explain your tied condition to the fire fighters when they arrive to put out the fire.


I wish I had the ability to become invisible
 
Granted; now, if only somebody could figure out a way of becoming visible again; mealtime has become a very messy affair.

I wish I was a successful, famous author.
 
Granted!

But while swimming you enter the Bremuda Triangle and disappear never to be seen again.

I wish they would bring back midget (yes... I KNOW this is a politically incorrect term) wrestling.
 
Granted! But they all turn out to be giant midgets.

I wish the SI swimsuit models would pay me a surprise visit.
 
Granted!!!

But they can only stay 5 minutes and they all wear sweat suits and parkas and refuse to take them off.

I wish I could walk through walls
 
Granted. You are now the Kool-Aid Man and crash thru walls on the whim of thirsty children.

I wish I had super speed.
 
Poof!!! You have super speed...

But you don't have super stop and you smash into a brick wall reducing yourself into what only can be described as a large glob of yuck!

I wish I could walk on water
 
Granted. Sadly afterwards, you receive the same treatment as the last person who did that.


I wish I had the power of the Hulk.
 
Granted. You're Jimi Hendrix. Try not to make too much noise banging on the lid of your coffin.



I wish I had more of those tasty burritos.
 
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