Do you think some part of your tickling fetish came from bullying/childhood difficu?

[duderino84]

So I was digging pretty deep through memories and I remembered parts of my childhood I (naturally) didn't have control over. Learning issues/fitting in and the like. Being tickled by my older brother when he would visit. Going through puberty and dealing with socializing/dating "shit" with people. Do you think it kind of shaped things you would become attracted to? Like the whole tickling/laughing connection?

I know of course it's an odd thread but I thought I'd ask because I wonder if things had turned out different how much into tickling I'd be.

 

[Wolf]

I'd say it's a reasonable thought. I can only speak from my own experience, but I'm pretty sure that being molested as a child made me more comfortable using tickling to express physical intimacy.
But once you're cognizant of it, it's something you can work through.

 

[duderino84]

I can't imagine what that's like but I kind of thought that would be one of the kind of experiences shared. For me it was kind of the opposite. I'd get the proper home life indoors and outside I'd get the typical verbal/physical shit. Plenty of issues with other people back then. Kinda made me tune inward. Add to it I'd hear some kid talk about how he "found" the porn channels on his rents cable box and I just was kind of disgusted at the time; I didn't relate well. I was big on reading tho. Lol its funny now to think I've become used to Internet porn when back then I (for the most part) grew up without Internet.

I just thought it was an interesting thought considering what I was accustomed to, what I wanted from people, and how eventually it all got shaped into what would be a fetish when I just forgot all about it.

 

[Rectangle]

I don't know.
I mean, I had rough moments with bullying and getting in fights and stuff in school as a kid..
..but the tickle stuff predates all of that by far.

My memories of being a knismo predate puberty, as in really young.
I don't really remember an age when it wasn't there., so it predates memories for me.
It was a strong fixation that just sort of started having sexual overtones on the edges around puberty.

Any social awkwardness/bullying etc came long after that for me.

 

[duderino84]

I misspoke about puberty, I meant before it "officially" began (seems like I'm posting without thinking again lol)....I had some clues about what I liked around 11 or so but I really was quiet about it til 16 or so. My ideas weren't really validated and decided that "this is tickling related" until like 17.

I was only sort of mentioning bullying/growing up (tho the thread got cut off even tho I filled in the subject line) because some of it seems to go together when I think about all this in retrospect.

 

[chicago]

Possibly, but I have no memories of such. I do remember having an intense phobia of tickling as a kid and I think that strong fear manifested into kink later but no clue what caused the initial terror.

 

[a7hgsir4h3jk]

Possibly, but I have no memories of such. I do remember having an intense phobia of tickling as a kid and I think that strong fear manifested into kink later but no clue what caused the initial terror.

I'm pretty much the same. I remember being terrified of tickling, among other weird things such as decapitation and oscillating fans (don't ask). It just always felt "dirty" to me, not to mention embarrassing. Didn't help that I was hyper sensitive to touch as well. I'm so glad I don't have decapitation as a fetish instead.

 

[arachnid95]

I don't think my own fetish developed because of any kind of problems. I remember having thoughts of feet and tickling when I was really, really little, though I obviously didn't understand those thoughts, and at no point was I abused or molested or had any real fear of being tickling. It just kind of... was there. The whole time. Forever.
If everyone else's tickle fetishes came from such examples of strife, then I must just be a unique case... XD

 

[DackJansen]

I definitely think there's a connection, and it can manifest itself in much more subtle ways. I can definitely understand how being molested can result in certain fetishes and an inability to identify with vanilla sex. It's really unfortunate that people have to go through that.

For me, the family I grew up in did not value intimacy. Feelings were never validated and there was subtle emotional abuse, so I never felt loved. I suppose because of that, my "normal" became abusing others, but not being a violent person by nature, I prefer the painless torture of tickling.

The concept of intimacy was just foreign to me. I never have, and don't think I ever will, be into genitalia the way I'm into stuff like tickling, bondage, soles, etc. I like the sadistic aspect of torturing people and breaking them. This turns me on MORE than the idea of making someone feel good. It's concerning to me and I don't think I'll ever have a normal sex life because of it. I've yet to meet a girl who likes getting her feet tickled, for instance. I'm 90% sure I turned out this way because of nurture, not nature. I wasn't born like this. For me it's more a fetish than a kink, which can be a problem.

 

[Rectangle]

I remember seeing a poll around here somewhere, asking at what age people knew they were into it.
The VAST majority was before seven years old, with leaning toward the younger side.
I remember seeing it recently when I went on a binge of reading old posts trying to figure out the roots of my own interest in it.

Hang on, going to look.

*Plods off, plods back*

Yup, found it.
Most people said "4-5 years old", which for most people, is about as far back as reliable memories go.
If you add in the "2-3" and "6-7" brackets, you've got most of the people with the fetish according to this (limited) data.

It seems like most people have been into this for as far back as memories reach, or close to it.

So for there to be any real impact of social awkwardness or bullying or what have you, it would have to come at that point or before for most of us, I would think.
Most bullying and social pressure to "fit in" comes later during adolescence, so I don't know man.

Oh, here's the link.
http://www.ticklingforum.com/showth...-age-you-remember-being-intrigued-by-tickling

 

[duderino84]

I remember seeing a poll around here somewhere, asking at what age people knew they were into it.
The VAST majority was before seven years old, with leaning toward the younger side.
I remember seeing it recently when I went on a binge of reading old posts trying to figure out the roots of my own interest in it.

Hang on, going to look.

*Plods off, plods back*

Yup, found it.
Most people said "4-5 years old", which for most people, is about as far back as reliable memories go.
If you add in the "2-3" and "6-7" brackets, you've got most of the people with the fetish according to this (limited) data.

It seems like most people have been into this for as far back as memories reach, or close to it.

So for there to be any real impact of social awkwardness or bullying or what have you, it would have to come at that point or before for most of us, I would think.
Most bullying and social pressure to "fit in" comes later during adolescence, so I don't know man.

Oh, here's the link.
http://www.ticklingforum.com/showth...-age-you-remember-being-intrigued-by-tickling

What I'm kinda seeing is an overwhelming majority are "lifers"; They probably went around poking people before, so some might be more normalized. I don't know, I don't think it's "weird" to like tickling, I'm starting to think I'm just too considerate with people, anticipating the response before it happens. Plus I'm that quiet type, tho I tend to say more or the wrong things when I get started. I'm not sure what age really is as a factor, I guess I was just seeing if people let it manifest in themselves because they were more self-absorbed at a younger age, or if it was something that just happened regardless of life events.

 

[quietguy]

I definitely skew toward the nature rather than nurture side. Wasn't there some article somewhere that talked about foot fetishes possibly being so common because the parts of the brain associated with genitalia and feet are right next to each other? Basically saying there could be some cross wiring going on. I don't know that has the full ring of truth since doesn't really explain other fetishes. But I remember having thoughts very, very young, and I don't know of anything in particular that would have caused it, unless something I don't really remember. It might be like being gay and some people just come to recognize it a little later or something. I dunno. 'Tis a mystery

 

[chicago]

I've always really liked how Myr explains it.

First up it's a paraphilia not a fetish.

Fetish is reserved for when a paraphilia becomes a disfunction, crippling the ability to proceed in sexual interaction without it being included. A paraphilia is simply a strong preference for a non standard sexual trigger.

So let's use the right terms rather then culturally degraded incorrect application of Fetish. Though this is a fight I've mostly given up on. The world has decided to redefine fetish.

There is a phase where the sort of chemical surges in the mind (caused by the hypothalamus AND other limbic systems) begins in the early part of a persons life (ages 3 to9) in the pre-sexual period.

These surges, lay down the base connectivity between sexual urges and random environmental elements. It is supposed that this process is there to allow for connectivity to culturally standard sexual elements, but it casts a wide net and random debris is also seeded into the individuals sexual matrix. These seeds have the POTENTIAL to become paraphilia once the person enters their sexual development phase (ages 9 and up) at which point they develop more fully and uniquely.

Myriads

http://ticklingforum.com/showthread.php?267900-Knismolagnia-is-Powerful&p=3992152#post3992152

 

[duderino84]

I definitely skew toward the nature rather than nurture side. Wasn't there some article somewhere that talked about foot fetishes possibly being so common because the parts of the brain associated with genitalia and feet are right next to each other? Basically saying there could be some cross wiring going on. I don't know that has the full ring of truth since doesn't really explain other fetishes. But I remember having thoughts very, very young, and I don't know of anything in particular that would have caused it, unless something I don't really remember. It might be like being gay and some people just come to recognize it a little later or something. I dunno. 'Tis a mystery

Erogenous zones, you mean?

I've always really liked how Myr explains it.



http://ticklingforum.com/showthread.php?267900-Knismolagnia-is-Powerful&p=3992152#post3992152

It's one of the first things I think about tho. I think fetish is a bit restrictive, that "you have to" be turned on just by that. But for me, my fetishes are kinda the first gears that start turning when I think of a prospect. Then it's all the traditional stuff.

 

[tickletherapist]

Never had bullying/childhood difficulties, and wasn't even tickled except for some playful pokes from relatives or friends so it's not my case. It started as an interest to this enigmatic feeling and to what I saw how girls reacted to this. And it has always been more complex and intriguing for me than just some paraphilia or indeed incorrectly applied word fetish.

 

[mavs41]

I have a a few memories of my older brother tickling me when I was like 4 and a a year or two after, I was doing it to my little brother and little girl next door. I remember seeing girls playfully doing it and it really turning me on. A specific example, I was in 7th grade, it was a Friday close to the last bell when a girl tickled her friend quickly, promising there would be more of that at their sleepover, later. So yeah, it's been a thing as long as I can remember.

 

[Wolf]

I've always really liked how Myr explains it.
http://ticklingforum.com/showthread.php?267900-Knismolagnia-is-Powerful&p=3992152#post3992152

Yeah, that's an excellent point.
I think, at some point, how someone develops a paraphilia isn't as important as how they deal with it.
And by deal with it, I don't mean there's anything wrong with it at all; but you can't be happy without accepting who you are.

 

[tickler29]

I don't think my own fetish developed because of any kind of problems. I remember having thoughts of feet and tickling when I was really, really little, though I obviously didn't understand those thoughts, and at no point was I abused or molested or had any real fear of being tickling. It just kind of... was there. The whole time. Forever.
If everyone else's tickle fetishes came from such examples of strife, then I must just be a unique case... XD

My fetish didn't come from any bad experiences either. I've just always been fascinated with tickling for as long as I can remember. I had my share of being bullied as a kid, but it had nothing to do with my fetish. Tickling was always a positive thing for me. In fact, fantasizing about tickling was kind of an escape for me at times.

 

[robmic]

My fetish didn't come from any bad experiences either. I've just always been fascinated with tickling for as long as I can remember. I had my share of being bullied as a kid, but it had nothing to do with my fetish. Tickling was always a positive thing for me. In fact, fantasizing about tickling was kind of an escape for me at times.

That's pretty much me. It started at a very young age. I would get a "tingle" when I either saw tickling on TV, in person, or was doing it to someone as a kid. Once I reached puberty I figured out why I was getting that "tingle".

 

[Aboundtime]

I think it can be a contributing factor. But I didn't have difficulties as a child. Just my brain hardwired the scene of April O'Neil being tickled as something fun and errousing. So every since then I've been into bondage and tickling. Could also explain why I don't mind playing with guys either because of Vernon being tickled immediately afterwards.

 

[Mrcool]

I don't have a tikling fetish But this does make sense

 

[The Internet]

No way. Not for me. I've been into tickling as long as I can remember, and my memory goes back vaguely to 1 1/2 and starts getting clearer with each year. Every time I saw a pretty female I wanted to tickle them, don't ask me why. I know I had a pretty neighbor when I was between the ages of 1 and 2 (we moved that year),and wishing I had tickled her.

I will say this: my father kept Playboy, Penthouse, Hustler, Club....all these porn magazines out in the open. My parents were young, it was the 70s, there was open nudity in the house, I saw nudity in movies....and I think it may have caused an indifference to what most people get off on I don't have the " naked lady" syndrome, there was no mystery about seeing the human body.

But there is mystery in touching it. And hunting that reaction, and coaxing it out.....honing your skills, learning about the human body......interacting with it rather than just ogling it........interacting with the person, they are an alive person, not just an object.....ah, that's our life's work, right? 😉

( I'm starting to feel snobby about our fetish again! lol. It's the best!)

So maybe being exposed to sex and porn and nudity, maybe I just developed my own sexuality based on what my thing was at the time: tickling. Like....I found my thing already, I don't need to look no further!

 

[CapturedDoll]

But there is mystery in touching it. And hunting that reaction, and coaxing it out.....honing your skills, learning about the human body......interacting with it rather than just ogling it........interacting with the person, they are an alive person, not just an object.....ah, that's our life's work, right? 😉

NAILED IT!!!!

 

[TKLVR18]

My experience is like this--I was like so many in the thread, getting butterflies frm watching tickling from an age that was...let's just say 'pre-pubescent' and leave it at that. When I got older into my young teens I started getting 'ler daydreams.

When I was a freshman in HS I moved to the big city and experienced bullying issues for the first time in my life. They never touched me, but I did a lot of running and being afraid to go from one classroom to the next.

When I was a senior I moved back to my hometown, lost the bullies, and found TT/TMF (though I'd been 'browsing' for a long time by then). I became active in the Community thanks to a few guys dragging me out of lurkerdom and getting me involved.

I was pretty depressed and on some anti-depression meds at the time, and still all 'ler, and lerring was pretty sexual to me--the situation of having that kind of control is a charged rush, no matter the situation--but I hadn't yet warmed to the idea of letting myself be that 'weak' as to 'lee.

Over the next year or so, whilest working through some pretty bad memories and feelings, I became a switch. The idea of being 'bullied' in a way that was entirely playful, by people who like me and only want to make me a combination of flustered so bad I can't think straight and happy became VERY appealing--after my issues with being bullied. I should point out that leeing isn't always sexual for me, like lerring--leeing can be therapeutic, a way for people to FORCE my guard down (as that's something I've had an issue with...since about the time I started getting bullied, come to think of it).

I'm curious to see people's lee/ler preferences in correlation to the answer to the bullying issue, I wonder if there's correlation like there was for me. '

~K